COUNT DRACULA, TOO! (UPDATED)
Have you heard those Census commercials?
Not the $250-million TV commercials. But now that you mention it, it only cost $237-million to make Avatar . Shouldn’t Ed Begley, Jr. at least be blue for $250 million? Or at least bluer than normal?
No, I mean the radio commercials. The ones that say the reason you need to fill out your census is so you can get stuff from the Gummint, so you can get your “fair share”. Karl Marx couldn’t have said it much better. Because he spoke German. And he woulda’ done it for a lot less than $250 million.
The example they use is education funding.
As a pay-off to unions, and to exert liberal control over any runaway school districts that might somehow be suceeding, Jimmy Carter invented the Education Department. Because conservatives didn’t kill it when there was a chance, a generation later it is accepted wisdom that the Federal Government should pay for your teachers and textbooks.
And you should fill out your census, not for the civic duty and representation as we all agreed to in the Constitution, but to get your cut of the booty, including the stuff we’re printing in the basement and borrowing from the Chinese with interest.
And then there’s the form itself.
Now I’m not calling anybody a racist, but the form I got seemed more focused on race than Archie Bunker at a Death Row Records reunion. Here’s the Ten Question Short Form they sent me:
1.) Are you Hispanic?
2.) Are you Latino?
3.) Are you Chicano?
4.) Are you Meztizo?
5.) Are you Tejano?
6.) Are you Latin American?
7.) South American?
8.) Central American?
9.) Spanish?
10.) What–don’t you want your cut of the booty?
11.) Oh, yeah; we almost forgot–how many people live at your house?
I wouldn’t really care, except I know this is all about their obsessive fixation with Racial Bean-Counting in order to hand out Race Favors in violation of the 1964 Civil Rights Act. Martin Luther King Day comes but once a year–but Anti-Martin Luther King Day lasts all year long, thanks in part to the census.
But at least it’s not as detailed as the old Long Form:
4,983.) How long have you owned your pet gekko (to the nearest hour)?
4,984.) How did you meet? (Attach extra pages if necessary. No staples.)
4,985.) Your gekko’s bowel movements; would you describe them as
a.) rare
b.) intermittent
c.) frequent
or
d.) more often than Sandy Berger uses the little boy’s room at the National Archives.
4,986.) What–you don’t want your cut of the booty?
Remember when they wanted to use “statistical sampling” (a.k.a.; “guessing”) instead of the “actual enumeration” we all agreed to in the Constitution? Every program for the last 50 years was going to “pay for itself” or ended up costing 600 times as much as originally estimated. Except for the health care bill, which is planned to cost a thousand times as much. So pardon us if we don’t trust your mad guessing skillz.
But I filled mine out and mailed it in, and so should you. That way, when they finally figure out the true National Debt, they can divide it equally and send you a bill for your “fair share”.
What–you don’t want your cut of the booty?
UPDATE: Maybe government would be smaller if we had advertising campaigns about what government was going to take from you instead of give to you. That’s why you never see a $250-million ad campaign saying you owe part of the $250 million.
Say Anything:
“…Michele Bachmann [is] leading the charge in talking about how the census has far exceeded its constitutional mandate. But when a resolution urging Americans to take part in the census came before the House of Representatives only one member of Congress voted against it.
Ron Paul.
It’s more than a little disheartening to see Republicans, who are ostensibly proponents of limited government, supporting an unconstitutional census that per the government’s own advertising facilitates the sort of expansion in government programs that has led to the current bankrupt nature of our national budget.
And this is no small matter. Refusing to participate in the census doesn’t just mean that you may lose some of your representation in the government, they can actually fine you $100 per question you refuse to answer up to a total fine of $5,000.
That’s just it–there should only be one question.
And if you refuse to pay the fine you can be put in jail.
This is exactly the sort of overbearing government activity Republicans should be opposing. Sadly, far too many of them are too busy joining the Democrats in thinking about all the new spending the census count will let them do in their states and districts.
At the very least, the other census questions not having to do with the constitutionally-required head count should be entirely optional.
We agreed to be counted, not categorized. We support the count because it’s Constitutional, and oppose the categorization because it’s used against the Constitution; to subvert the Civil Rights Act and Equal Protection.
Good for Michele Bachmann; conservatives should run on a Repeal ticket.
And forget resolutions; Congress wrote those laws and Congress can unwrite them. One of the best ideas Newt had was to have Repeal Days, dedicated to undoing some of the damage already done, instead of just piling more shiny new laws on top of the last ones. And Ron Paul is still a dorf.
Ronald Reagan:
“Public servants say, always with the best of intentions, “What greater service we could render if only we had a little more money and a little more power.”
And a little more information, too.