GIVE TIL IT HURTS!

Moar continuing ed!

Climatology 101 this time, courtesy of Aesop.

To listen to the idiot retards of the media (but I repeat myself), you’d think everyone living in Califrutopia should be building an ark or something.

Fortunately, unlike most of the failed stand-up comics and braindead spokesbimbos who become weatherguessers and newsreaders, some of us have lived here more than a year or two, and we know that California has wet years, and dry years, which alternate at whim. Lather, rinse, repeat.

Cleverly, there has long been a name for what’s going on now, and it’s not the “Pineapple Express”, the “Fruit Cocktail Zephyr”, or any other such dipshitical dopey name they focus-grouped into being to try and sell more commercials in between bouts of weather doomporn.

The actual name for what’s happening now goes by a rather more accurate name.

We call it “rain”.

It ain’t caused by globull warmism, or climate change, nor any other such ginned up silliness so stupid, you need horsefaced fetal alcohol midwit dropouts from Sweden to shill for it.

In fact, there’s another clever name for what’s happening at the moment, and why.

It’s called “winter”.

And – shocker of shockers – in February!!! Who’d have foreseen that?!?

If ever there was a time to panic, surely it is now, Califrutopians. Be sure that while you do, you stay tuned to your local TV news station to keep up with the latest weather updates; as always, our one and only concern is Keeping You Safe!©

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1

An idea whose time has surely come

Not a sportsball guy by any stretch, so I can’t honestly claim to care one way or the other about what pro athletes (or any athletes, actually) might or might not do, say, or think—or to even to be aware of it, most of the time. But this right here, I support one hundred and ten percent.

Black National Anthem at the Super Bowl
What happens if a white person takes a knee?

The NFL has announced that for the fourth year in a row, the so-called black national anthem, “Lift Every Voice and Sing,” will be performed at the Super Bowl.

It appears we’ve come full circle since the 2004 Democratic National Convention when then-Illinois State Sen. Barack Obama said: “Yet even as we speak, there are those who are preparing to divide us…there’s not a liberal America and a conservative America — there’s the United States of America. There’s not a black America and white America and Latino America and Asian America; there’s the United States of America…We are one people, all of us pledging allegiance to the stars and stripes, all of us defending the United States of America.”

The national anthem is also the black/white/Asian/Hispanic national anthem. It is the national anthem of every citizen.

As for the black national anthem to be sung at the Super Bowl, what’s next? How about playing the University of Michigan fight song? What happens if at least some players reject the narrative that blacks remain victims and consider the singing of the black national anthem at the Super Bowl divisive?

The first white or black player who takes a knee at the Super Bowl during the “black national anthem” will immediately have the league’s bestselling jersey. As Nike says, “Just do it!”

Yes indeedy. Hell, if this idea should take hold and become a trend—not that it will, natch, because RAYCISS!!!©—I might possibly be persuaded to tune in a game on the TeeWee once in a while again, if only for that.

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1

Happy (?) New year!

I made a funny.

I saw something similar over the weekend somewhere or other, but when I went looking I couldn’t find it again, since I couldn’t remember where the heck I’d seen the danged thing. So I decided to hell with it and just struck out on my own—found the raw image, so’s it’s the same pitcher, same sentiment more or less, I just worded it differently and added the CF link, of course. Hopefully the maker of the original won’t waste his time trying to sue me over it; the phrase “blood from a rock” springs immediately to mind.

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1

Coast to coast road trip in a 75 Dart

First question that occurs to me is, why on earth would you WANT to? Myself, I wouldn’t trust a Dart to get me to the corner liquor store. But then, some people are just natural-born risk takers, and love taking on a challenge so daunting, so obviously insane, even the Gods Themselves would tremble at the prospect.

Dart Across America: Adventures of Driving a 1975 Dodge Dart 3,300 Miles in Six Days
The 225-cid. slant-six engine is touted for being bulletproof and able to handle all kinds of abuse. That’s one major reason why Erik Jesperson chose a 1975 Dodge Dart as the classic car for his coast-to-coast road trip adventure from Ocean City, Washington to Ocean City, New Jersey. The other solid reason was its mostly clean, rust-free body.

The road trip was arranged after Erik’s friend Josh asked what he wanted to do for his bachelor party before his wedding on December 1, 2023. A road trip across the country had always been on Erik’s bucket list, and he’s not the type to turn down an excuse to buy another project car.

After locating the 1975 Dodge Dart at a dealership, he had the car inspected by a local mechanic before fully committing to the trip. The mechanic came back with good news, simply recommending a tune up and stating the wipers didn’t work and the suspension was worn, nothing that would immediately jeopardize the 3,300-mile six-day drive.

“The Roadkill and Vice Grip Garage type shows have always spiked my interest,” Erik began. “Being a mechanic, I knew if I had the tools and supplies, I could probably make it happen.” Another piece of reassurance came from Josh, who works for U-Haul and had the ability to locate and rent a truck and trailer anywhere in the country at a cheaper rate (worst case scenario, of course). “My fiancé, Kristen, loved the idea of us acquiring an older car that we could use in the wedding as well as take to car shows and cruises together,” he added. That was the icing on the cake. Erik finalized the purchase and worked with the salesperson to pre-order any parts that could be needed for the trip, such as a mini starter, alternator, cap, rotor, fuel filter, and fluids. He packed items like spark plug wires and a few other parts in his luggage before catching his flight to Washington.

Wise move. The old MOPAR PoS did better than anyone intimately familiar with the road-apple abominations might expect, actually; minor annoyances like a broken fuel gauge,  a rotted-out heater core, and getting becalmed in Sturgis H-D rally traffic were dealt with, until…wait for it…WAAAIIIT FOR IT

DodgeDartRoadTrip

Gee, didn’t see THAT coming.

Our intrepid duo did indeed make it to Ocean City, NJ in the end, which speaks volumes about their pluck, ingenuity, and good old can-do spirit. Jesperson and his fiancé plan to keep the “car” for some reason or other, which speaks volumes about their mental health, far as I’m concerned. Then again, though, I’ve never been known for being at all hesitant about embarking on high-risk, no-net road trips myself. Remember, I’m the guy who rode a 1971 Shovelhead FLH, replete with apehangers and suicide shift, from CLT to NYC just to see a pretty girl.

TWICE; I did that TWICE. So, y’know, maybe I ain’t exactly the one to be sitting in judgment on Eric and his affianced, eh?

(Via Ed Driscoll)

2

Ingrates

Looks like them dang Injuns think they’re allowed to arrive at their own opinions or something.

Native American Group Threatens Boycott if Washington Commanders Don’t Change Name Back to Redskins
In a plot twist no one saw coming, a group of Native Americans is threatening to boycott the Washington Commanders unless they change their name back to the Washington Redskins.

The Native American Guardians Association (NAGA) posted a meme to its X account (formerly known as Twitter) with the message to “Educate not eradicate,” and wants the team to go back to its original name.

“At this moment in history, we are formally requesting that the team revitalize its relationship with the American Indian community by (i) changing the name back to ‘The Redskins’ which recognizes America’s original inhabitants and (ii) using the team’s historic name and legacy to encourage Americans to learn about, not cancel, the history of America’s tribes and our role in the founding of this Great Nation,” the letter said.

“Should we need to encourage a national boycott similar to what happened with Anheuser Busch (Bud Light) which is now down $27 billion (note, not one brick thrown, not one highway blocked, not one bridge burned) — WE WILL DO JUST THAT,” the letter continued.

The letter also warned that it would stand its ground because, if “you don’t acknowledge history, we are doomed to repeat it.”

Boy, the irony just doesn’t come any more delicious than that. In another note-perfect Tweet X Whatthehellever, the NAGA takes NY-state high school sports teams to task for the same thing, dubbing the sudden wave of PC-mandated name changes “the eradication movement.” Yep, you better just believe you’ll be seeing that one again around these h’yar parts, people.

4

Question asked, question answered

Over at Liberty Daily, we find this amusing link: Let’s Lighten the Mood This Weekend! Are Cats Smarter Than Dogs?

Easy-peasy lemon-squeezy. Having had both cats AND dogs my entire life, I feel I can speak with some authority on this, umm, pressing issue. And the answer is: cats are inarguably, indubitably smarter.

What would make you think so, you ask? Why, merely this: Any and every time I ever had both a cat and a dog at the same time, which has been fairly frequently, I always had to find some way to block off the cat litter box so’s the dog couldn’t get at it; you see, dogs will eat cat shit as if it were filet mignon*. Seeing as how I never once ran across a cat that showed the slightest interest in chowing down on doggie-doo, y’know, that pretty much settles the matter as far as I’m concerned. YMMV, of course and as usual.

*Saves on the hassle and back pain of scooping out the cat box, sure. Then again, it’s another reason why I have NEVER allowed any dog of mine to lick me all over my face the way some dog-owners seem to delight in.

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Laying the hate

Okay, from this diatribe I’m gonna guess that Ace is pretty much off the Trump train.

Wow, you would never guess that Donald Trump paid off a stripper to keep quite the adulterous affair he had with her, or that he’s been found culpable of sexual assault against a woman.

Before you object — stuff it. I’m always being told “Gee I don’t know why DeSantis people are so angry about Trump’s constant scumbag lies, this kind of thing always happens in a primary, just deal with it.”

Well Trump was found liable in a rape lawsuit. Deal with that.

We have ONE RULE here, people. Not one rule for the Trump scumbag and another rule for his opponents.

I guess Trump will be running on morality now.

Trump, who has spent most of his campaign money and time attacking Ron DeSantis rather than Joe Biden, now calls upon his opponents to drop out of the race because, you see, just by contesting the nomination, they’re attacking other Republicans instead of Joe Biden.

Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me?

Even by Trump’s slimy standards, that is outrageous. He has done nothing but attack an actual conservative Republican who, unlike him, is able to achieve win after win on conservative policy, instead of ranting on Twitter all fucking day.

The former president and GOP front-runner said it was time for Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis and others he dismissed as “clowns” to clear the field, accusing them of “wasting hundreds of millions of dollars that Republicans should be using to build a massive vote-gathering operation” to take on Biden in November.

How much of the money you’ve grifted from supporters have you spent on that, Mr. So-Tired-of-Winning-That-You-Just-Stopped-Winning?

Trump’s brand lately is losing. Losing his own races, and making horrible picks based just on whether someone is 1, a celebrity (or, really, a “celebrity;” Trump is desperate for anyone that he can pretend is in “show business”) and 2, willing to kiss his ass.

And these picks also lose.

He has to prove he is capable of winning — and of answering the many, many criticisms that the media/left has of him, but also the criticisms that (the) actual conservative right has of him.

But…but…but WAIT. You mean there’s still an “actual conservative right” out there? Man alive, that’s good to hear. I thought it had gone extinct years ago.

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Five German dances

One of my personal-fave Schubert compositions is his “Five German dances in C Major, D90”—a lilting confection showcasing all the lovely, melodic tunefulness for which the incomparable Franz Schubert is so justly renowned. But that isn’t the main reason I’m embedding this next vid of the piece; no, that would be for the delightful way the conductor, Matthias Foremny, umm, conducts himself in front of the orchestra.

Folks, that there is the living embodiment of what we mean by the phrase “a man who truly enjoys his work.” His illimitable passion; his zest; his pure heart-swelling glee comes through in every goofy facial expression, every broad smile. The way he stands nearly stock-still for extended periods, then suddenly starts leaping about, gesticulating frantically, as if someone had slipped a live scorpion down the front of his trousers, waving and grimacing, is just too damned funny. You gotta love it…which, I most certainly do. Maestro Foremni, I am definitely a fan, sir.

The Trannytittygate scramble

As the “Biden” junta trips over itself desperately trying to backpedal on the White House “Pride Party” Trannytittygate fiasco, Stacey Lennox offers some excellent suggestions on how the object lesson might be driven fully home for these inept, bumbling doofi.

Maybe don’t live your truth and express your joy in front of kids at an official government function. This was predictable as soon as hosting YouTube stars at the White House became a thing. It started with a woman who bathed in Fruit Loops, moved on to Dylan Mulvaney looking like a garish Audrey Hepburn with an Adam’s apple, and ended with people stripping on the White House lawn. Our enemies are laughing.

Hell, can you blame ‘em? At this point, I’M laughing right along with them myself.

If a bit of embarrassment is all it takes to roll back the revolutionary LBGT+ lunacy, here are a few other things we should demand the White House schedule immediately. First, have Joe Biden attend a “family” drag show in a tavern. Put him right in the front row to observe how grown men in dresses interact with children. If he’s lucky, the organizers will let him sniff the hair of a kid or two.

Then, they should send Jill Biden to a local junior high. As an educator, this should be an easy ask. During her visit, she needs to read aloud selected passages of Gender Queer on camera. Remember, these books are necessary, so there is no reason the event should not stream live on Twitter.

As compassionate as she is, she should visit at least one teen boy and one teen girl in the hospital after transition surgery. Then the butcher who performed the double mastectomy or orchiectomy should explain the surgery and recovery in detail. She should also meet with Jazz Jennings’s mother, who can describe the lifelong “wound care” for boys who receive vaginoplasties. Again, these events should be broadcast live, preferably before the end of Pride month.

Then, I would like the president and his wife to welcome Chloe Cole to the White House. Cole is a young woman suing the doctors who provided her testosterone and performed a double mastectomy as a teen. They should be forced to look her in the eye and assure her she received “life-saving care” because nothing could be further from the truth.

Sounds good to me, I’m all in. Let’s do this, people!

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No fate except what we make—or DON’T make

Leftism: a self-solving problem.

Go Ahead, Fly That Rainbow Flag
But before you do, realize one thing: When you advocate for this — which is beyond your personal choice and into trying to influence others to “celebrate” or “join” it — you are advocating for the literal suicide of your own species.

Don’t kid yourself. Just look here.

At 1.784 births per female over her lifetime each generation produces 0.892 of itself in children. Some small percentage of those children die before reaching sexual maturity and thus the capacity to reproduce themselves, but we’ll ignore that and count it as zero.

A “generation” is about 20-30 years on a “family” basis. That is, that’s when the next generation begins to have children. But on a social basis — that is, across society, its the bookends that matter and the generally-accepted number of generations in the last 100 years is roughly six. I’ll call it five — or 20 years per.

Well, at the current rate by 2200 the “replacement” population of the United States will be one third of what it is now — and headed toward zero.

By the way at one third of the current population in “replacement value” you had better pray the things that need to be done today by people (e.g. building roads, etc.) are all done by robots because if they’re not society will collapse as the basic requirements to maintain it will be lost. Indeed that will happen well before we get to that point.

I will not be alive to see that but my daughter has reasonably-good odds to be.

If you have children under 18 yours almost-certainly will live long enough to see that.

In other words if you’re an adult and put up with this crap you are committing the literal slow suicide of your own species.

On a somewhat related note, it’s long been my own contrarian, tongue-in-cheek theory that, rather than opposing abortion on moral and philosophical grounds, conservatives should perhaps consider encouraging it, on strictly practical ones. Since it will be mostly shitlibs who avail themselves of this beautiful, uplifting womens’ “health care” “choice,” all we’d have to do to be rid of them forever is just sit back and wait them out—eventually they’ll all die off, and POOF! Just like that, all our national political and cultural problems will be gone like smoke on a gusty day.

(Via WRSA)

The United States of Chiquitastan

Not a banana republic. NOT.

‘The U.S. Is Not A Banana Republic,’ Says Biden While Showing Off Cool New Uniform

ElPresidenteBiden
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In an address to the nation, El Presidente Biden showed off his cool new uniform covered with flashy medals and assured the nation that the U.S. is not a banana republic.

“Listen, folks, this is ridiculous,” said El Presidente as machine gun fire went off in the background. “Just because I’m using the corrupt power of my administration to prosecute a political opponent, doesn’t mean we are a banana republic. We’re a nation of laws and freedom! If you weren’t free, would I be wearing my beautiful gold Presidential Medal of Freedom right now? I think not!”

Media outlets praised Biden’s bold and impressive new look. “It’s as if the shiny gold of Dear Leader’s well-deserved medals are signaling a new dawn for our country and all humanity,” said CNN anchor Wolf Blitzer. “For the first time, I feel safe, wrapped in the loving arms of our Lord Ruler. Blessings be upon him!”

Sources say Biden’s political opponent, Donald Trump, is finally being held responsible for the egregious crime of having classified documents while not being a member of the ruling party. “I AM THE MOST PERSECUTED PERSON WHO HAS EVER LIVED,” said Trump in an all-caps rant on TRUTH Social. “NO ONE HAS EVER BEEN MORE MISTREATED THAN I HAVE. THIS IS A PHONY WITCH HUNT AND EVERYONE KNOWS IT!”

Sources confirmed Trump is scheduled to disappear mysteriously next Tuesday.

It’s (not) funny ’cause it’s true.

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You will be made to care

Even if—ESPECIALLY if—you don’t, not in the least.

Dying Vice Launches ‘Queer Sports’ Series, Hastens Its Demise
Dying Social Justice™ outlet Vice, apparently pathologically incapable of reform, is hastening its self-destruction by introducing a cringe segment called “Queer Sports.”

Video at the link—featuring some fat carpet-muncher dyke broad who obviously never participated in any sport not involving a comfy sofa, an xtra-jumbo-sized bag of Cheetos, and a case of designer beer in her entire life—which I won’t be embedding here, didn’t watch and have no intention of ever watching, and highly recommend you not watch yourself. Naturally, he/she/it is waving a giant rainbow fag-flag joyously around in the video screenshot, because QUEER SPORTS!!!! or something. Anyways. Onwards.

The non-binary non-athlete’s main gripe is that “pride” events hosted by nearly every major professional sports franchise are too “performative,” which is ironic given that performative Tolerance™ and Diversity™ are the entire demand.

“Are pride nights, important, Lyndsey?” the moderator prompts — as if that’s an open question subject to legitimate debate.

“I think they’re important, but I also think it’s gotten very performative,” Lyndsey replies, with an upward inflection that suggests she’s asking a question and not answering one. “Very like, ‘this is what we’re supposed to do. We’re supposed to do it in June and like, then, we’ll kind of forget about it.”

If people like Lyndsey had their druthers, every minute of every hour of every day would be a nonstop orgasmic celebration of “pride.”

This criticism of corporations bending over backward to cater to gender-obsessed ideologues at the expense of the vast majority of their customer bases who haven’t totally surrendered themselves to the Social Justice™ hive mind as “performative” is quite common within the so-called LGBTQ+++™ “community,” which is a euphemism for the insular cult of self-appointed representatives of a made-up demographic.

Ben’s conclusion is worth the price of admission all by itself, being perfectly, one-hundred-percent true.

Making them live their “truth”

Anything goes.


As do I. I mean, really, what could possibly be more fair? T’was toxic feminism created this voracious, all-consuming beast; now, let them live with it—cheek by jowl, in the house they themselves built for the rest of us, until they’re sick unto death of being forced to keep close-quarters company with the stinking, grotesque thing.

 GP also has a copy of Shepherd’s application to compete as a wyrmynnzzz, wherein zhirm hilariously declares “I identify as a woman for this contest.” Naturally, the weightlifting Powers That Be are pissing all over themselves trying to find a way to short-circuit the jolt of high-voltage reality being hurled their way by the Zeus-like Ms Shepherd.

According to the Reduxx report, the Global Powerlifting Committee of New Zealand (GPCNZ) appears to be scrambling to keep Shepherd out of the competition — even going so far as to change their rule book to say that he is ineligible.

The report points out that in their 2023 Rulebook, the Global Powerlifting Committee of New Zealand (GPCNZ) recognizes self-declared gender identity. In a section of the guidelines titled “Transgender Athletes,” GPCNZ states that “gender is presented on a spectrum” and that the organization “respects the autonomy of the individual and how they identify.”

“An archived version of the official website dated March 30 does not display the GPCNZ rules for trans-identifying competitors, instead leaning heavily on self-identification,” the report explains. “But, after submitting his application and declaring himself a ‘woman’ for the purposes of the competition, Shepherd was hastily sent an email and told he was not allowed to self-identify as transgender and must have been on estrogen for at least one year to compete.”

Shepherd is challenging their decision to exclude him.

You go, girl ummm, boy ummm, Manwoman ummm, whatever.

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