GIVE TIL IT HURTS!

Hey lawdy MAMA!

I’ve been stuck staring at this…ummm, story…ever since Ace first brought it up the other day.

Mum trolled as boobs ‘steal spotlight’ in ‘indecent’ dress at son’s birthday party
A mum claims her own cleavage “stole the spotlight” from her son’s birthday party.

Raquel Dicuru, 37, was throwing a party for her son’s seventh birthday last month while her sister-in-law filmed her lighting the candles on the cake.

It wasn’t until the mum, from Tonbridge, Kent, watched it back that she saw her purple sundress revealed much of her chest.

Happily, the comely (and hoo boy, is she ever that, as can be seen in the several other pics included with this bodacious article) Ms Dicuru has boucoup chestage to reveal, and it looks to be well worth the revealing, bless her perfectly proportioned, shapely heart.

Tig ol bitties!

Raquel’s riposte to the juiceless, withered old killjoys who took umbrage with the inadvertent display of her succulent fun-bags was spot on:

In response, Raquel has told her followers to “get a life”.

Attagirl, you tell ’em. I could be mistaken, I admit, but I can’t help but get the distinct feeling the bluenoses’ unsolicited critique just might have been motivated primarily by envy—the males, because they ain’t got anything like that waiting for ’em at home, and the females, because ditto. Certainly, it’s a pretty safe bet that young master Dicuru saw quite a lot of those tig ol’ bitties early on, or at least until he was weaned off of ’em—one assumes under extreme, kicking-and-screaming protest—and was therefore already quite familiar with the edifying spectacle anyway.

For some strange reason, this feel-good story puts me in mind of a certain RAB classic.

Now as it happens, among a crap-ton of other artists the Stray Cays covered that one early in their illustrious career, with Setzer tacking on one of the coolest verses yet written as a bonus:

Well, I’m smoking past the filter
And it’s burnin’ my lips
Yeah, I’m smokin’ past the filter
And it’s burnin’ my lips
My whole body is a-shakin’ right to my fingertips

Yep, you go on and try and tell me that ain’t just like mama used to make. Knowing Brian as I do, and I know him pretty well, he would be extremely gratified that I’d thought to include him in this particular post, and for all the right reasons too. A little extry rockabilly twangerrifickness for ya.

Lots and lots of excellent, obscure stuff on that album, but it’s that first tune I particularly wanted to call y’all’s attention to. If you’re into it, the fifth song—”Hot Rod Baby—is another one of my all-time faves. GONNA SUCK THIS CAT RIGHT UP MY PIPES…

Update! Yes, I know, I’m obsessing here, but can you blame me? Actually, I been mulling it over trying to come up with some conceivable downside for the kid here, seeing as how all those green-eyed bluenoses claim to be upset about how his hot MILF ruined his birthday for him by the heinous, hateful sin of letting ’em breathe without malice aforethought, and I confess I’m drawing a blank on that.

I mean, the child doesn’t look to be terribly upset in the two (2) pics he appears in in the article, as far as I can discern. And honestly, why would he be? Mama made the both of ’em famous the world over because a bunch of self-righteous Holy Joes got their panties in a bunch over nothing whatsoever.

Think of it: for the rest of his life, he gets to tell his buddies the funny story about that time he and his mom made the newspapers and got everybody all in a dither because, even pushing 40, she was still a sexy, eye-catching lass. He’ll be laughing over this tempest in a teapot from now on; he’ll consider Year 7 the greatest birthday party he ever did have. It’ll be a long, long time before he has to buy his own beer once he’s old enough to belly up to the bar for a pint of stout at his local pub with a story like this to recount.

And like I said earlier, it ain’t as if he didn’t already KNOW his mom was sporting a righteous shirt-full long before now; he didn’t just learn of it after every swingin’ Richard in once-Great Britain got all frothy and fizzy-lipped over it and pointed it out to all and sundry with great outrage and vexation. If there’s any real downside to be found here, for anybody at all except the aforementioned Holy Joe and Jane—who really ought to just shut their yaps and mind their own beeswax—be damned if I can find it.

Money shot!

Wasn’t gonna bother with this one originally, since it’s just not the sort of “news” item I give a crap about ordinarily. But then I read the New York Post’s write-up, which is so wonderful I just can’t help myself. First, you get the archetypical Post grabber-headline.

Woman fires gun at her vagina in cam show crotch shot gone horribly wrong

Heh. You begin to see what I mean right off the bat, I betcher. Right smack in the Post’s wheelhouse, a real gopher ball for those guys. But then, this IS the iconic tabloid that gave us the most famous headline in newspaper history, after all. On to the, umm, juicy bits.

Georgia webcam model Lauren Hunter Daman, 27, redefined “crotch shot” after discharging a firearm into her vagina during an alleged sex stunt gone awry.

“The female had shot herself in the vagina accidentally,” paramedic Brittany Rivers reportedly told responding police officers of the incident, which reportedly occurred on the morning of Nov. 9 at a residence in Thomaston, per a report by the Upson County Sheriff, the Smoking Gun reported.

Later interviews with witnesses revealed that the sex pistol-turned-gunshot victim was apparently alone in her bedroom when the weapon — a 9mm handgun — went off.

Officers were first alerted to firearm fiasco after receiving an “accidental gunshot wound” call from the residence, according to the police report. Upon arriving at the scene, a sheriff’s deputy encountered EMS Rivers, who was holding the unloaded handgun and a spent bullet casing in her hands.

She told the officer that Daman had blasted herself in the netherregions.

Police then conducted interviews with Daman’s three housemates, two of whom were present during the accident, to try and shed light on the alleged boudoir backfire.

Jordan Allen, the reported owner of the firearm, told officers that he was “in the kitchen walking back to the bedroom when he heard the gun go off.” Upon reaching the bedroom, Allen discovered Daman with “a small amount of blood” on her leg, at which point she reportedly informed him “that she shot herself accidentally” and apologized.

Meanwhile, a second witness named Cody Starnes told deputies that his mother Addie Ruth Johnson came into his bedroom and reported that “Daman had been shot.”

Allen revealed to officers how her inadvertent vagino-blasty allegedly transpired.

“Boudoir backfire”? “Inadvertent vagino-blasty”? COME ON, MAN!!! Pure, classic Post-age right there, and no mistake about it.

Now, like most of you miscreants and ne’er do wells out there in CF Land, I wouldn’t give a greasy Biden-shart if every last “newspaper” in America went under and ceased all publishing operations by mid-morning tomorrow—excepting the New York Post. Them, and only them, I would truly hate to see close up shop, and would mourn deeply if they did. The loss of such a wonderful news outlet would be a grievous one indeed, a bona fide catastrophe not just for NYC but for the entire nation. Long may those rascals wave, I say! America needs the Post, now more than ever before.

Fire In The Hole update! Pics of Miss Smokin’ Snatch—the Vented Slotte Girl, Kid Kordite Krotch herself—over at the Daily Mail. I have to admit, she’s rather cute in most of ’em, in that gormless-yet-worldly, slutty-naif way you often come across in the better, more upscale trailer parks. Way more so than I expected she would be, anyhoo.

3

Tricks ‘n’ treats

Elon Musk wins the Innarnuts. Handily, you might say.

As Stephen wryly reminds us, “The thing about Musk is that he might just do it.” I hope like hell he does. Seeing as how it’s Halloween and all, I have all the excuse I’ll ever need for running this.

Elvira is hot stuff right enough, and no mistake. But being partial to redheads the way I am, I kinda prefer Cassandra Peterson myself.

Hey, they don’t call ’em fun bags for nothing, you know.

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5

Mamalicious!

I’m laboring mightily here to refrain from making the all-too-obvious “MILF militia” crack, really I am. But it’s hard. So, so hard.

Mamalitia.jpeg

All my crass joking around aside, bless these comely lasses for their pluck, their initiative, and their can-do spirit, as laid out in the group’s mission statement:

Mamalitia is a community of constitution loving women that recognize our empowerment comes from fully engaging in our children’s education, our wellness, food and financial sovereignty, and overall skills. We are committed to building the world we want to live in, getting back to our roots while empowering women from every walk of life.

Mamalitia was formed in 2019, and is based in California where the founder saw a need to prepare women during a time of uncertainty. We are a non partisan group of women who support the Constitution and support uplifting other women. We are made up of professionals and homemakers, women trained in natural medicine, business owners, mothers and women who want to learn how to be self sustaining if and when needed.

Our women are trained in how to communicate should we be cut off

Our women are trained in protecting our homes

Our women are trained in how to prepare with food and supplies

Our women are trained in medic skills

Our women are trained in community support

Our women are creating schools

The tyrants have created women who are ready to go like it’s 1776.

In California? You go, girls, and good on ya. Needless to say, Mamalitia being comprised of patriotic, self-reliant, and indomitable sorts, the usual shitlib suspects are all a-snivel:

Triggered leftists are reportedly threatening a group of moms opposed to mandatory vaccines in California who have formed a pro-Second Amendment group empowering women called the “Mamalitia.”

On Sunday, the Mamalitia group announced it would cancel public meet-and-greet events after receiving terroristic threats following media hit pieces which mischaracterized the group as dangerous radical extremists.

“Mamalitia community has canceled all public meet and greet events due to media attacks, irresponsible reporting and false claims that have invited terrorist organizations to threaten our women and children,” reads a press release put out by the group.

Yeah, well, I can think of a really good retort to that kind of nonsense. More than just the one, actually, none of which involve putting up with a second’s worth of shit from the quivering queefs. More, and more pussified:

Dr. Richard Carpiano is a professor of public policy and sociology at the University of California, Riverside who has followed the group and its movements on social media since its founding.

He says Aguilar was in Washington, D.C., in January when a violent coup stormed congress, though there’s no evidence she breached the building.

But she has been seen on social media alongside members of groups like the Proud Boys.

He’s concerned that with this rhetoric some group members could become violent.

“When you’re showing pictures of you with weapons, you are advertising services to train people in firearms. There’s no reason whatsoever to think they’re not pushing some extremist view,” he said.

The article also cited state Senator Richard Pan (also a former UC professor), who claimed the group had bullied and harassed lawmakers.

“Not only did they protest the public health measures but they then employed tactics to bully and intimidate people,” Pan told CBS Sacramento.

I strongly suspect that, in your case, it would NOT be a difficult thing to do, Poindexter. Probably be a lot tougher to AVOID intimidating a “man” like you, in fact. You and the limpid Miss Carpiano sound as if you’d both collapse into a piss-yellow puddle on the sidewalk, hysterical tears copiously flowing, if a medium-sized dog growled in your general direction.

Most peculiar, innit, how the self-proclaimed “feminists”—especially the “male” variety—immediately soil their Underoos at the mere sight of a truly strong, independent-minded woman? I must inquire once more: HOW THE FUCK IS IT that we ever allowed such miserable specimens to take our country from us in the first place?

(Via Renegade Wes)

Gun Club Galz redux

Now THAT’S what I’m talking, brah. Courtesy of commenter Redhawk, who so thoughtfully provided the link for us, bless his generous heart. Muchas gracias, señor Red.

GunClubGalz-2.jpg

I love my wife, but OH! You kid! Or, as the immortal Jimmy Durante would opine: Hotchachacha!! And while we’re on the subject of luscious babes-in-arms, feast your eyes on this more contemporary example:

GunClubGalz-3.jpg

Alas, this one’s backstory will make your pulse pound in a far less agreeable way.

Instagram has removed conservative political commentator Kaitlin Bennett’s iconic graduation photo from three years ago for “violence and incitement.”

Meanwhile, the platform has allowed an endless stream of threats against the right-wing firebrand to continue for years.

Apparently, Instagram believes that photos of you peacefully exercising your Second Amendment right are a crime. In their notification to Bennett, they said “we don’t allow content that may lead to a genuine risk to physical harm or direct threat to public safety.”

Instagram has removed conservative political commentator Kaitlin Bennett’s iconic graduation photo from three years ago for “violence and incitement.”

Meanwhile, the platform has allowed an endless stream of threats against the right-wing firebrand to continue for years.

Apparently, Instagram believes that photos of you peacefully exercising your Second Amendment right are a crime. In their notification to Bennett, they said “we don’t allow content that may lead to a genuine risk to physical harm or direct threat to public safety.”

Right on, babe—”come and take it” indeed. Read the rest for a sampling of the ugly Instagram-approved threats of bodily harm hurled from behind a keyboard in Mommy’s dimly-lit basement at the lovely Miss Bennett for committing the hate-crime of aggregated exercise of her Constitutional rights, along with several counts of embracing said rights as if they were a matter of pride rather than proper shame. Kudos to ya, Kaitlin, and forever may you wave. A single one of you will always be worth more than several legions of your sniveling detractors.

Gun Club Galz

My good friend and fellow musical reprobate Jeremy sends one from the Golden Age:

GunClubGalz.jpg

Whether you’re talking about the guns, the girls, the clothes, or the hairstyles, they just don’t make ’em like that anymore. And that’s too bad, in my opinion. We’ve lost a lot along the road to Progtard Utopia, most of which we’d have been better off holding on to.

Another case of a gun stopping a crime without a shot being fired

Wonder if the fools will learn anything from this experience?

Shit, who am I kidding.

kimberly-m-gardner-3.jpg

The aforementioned McCloskeys, of course, are the St Louis attorneys who brandished some hardware at a mob of “peaceful protesters” who had broken down a gate to their neighborhood clearly marked with “No trespassing” and “Private property” signs. It was later learned that the two are self-declared BLM supporters and Mark 1-Mod 0 libtards, more or less, so the fact that they even had any guns at all is an indicator of your typical shitlib hypocrisy. Also obvious from the next pic is why liberals should never be allowed to play with guns:

Gun-donts-STLou.jpg

Pathetic. Pretty much everything about this picture, from a proper gun-handling point of view, is back-asswards and wrong. As for whether they shouldn’t oughta be defending their property against a gang of marauding thugs with firearms, well, I just gotta wonder how quickly the gendarmerie would have had a conservative and/or less well-connected couple booked and in the slammer, their property confiscated, and what their prospects might be for ever getting their freedom or their stuff back.

Hey, your rules, libtards, not ours. If the McCloskeys wind up finding themselves forced to live by ’em against all odds…well, my inclination is to say that one might be amazed how little I care about their plight.

On the other hand, though, maybe they DID learn something at that.

Mark and Patricia McCloskey said they grabbed their guns and stood in front of their house, on their own property, to back-off screaming Black Lives Matter protesters, and told KSDK TV they thought they’d have to make a deadly last stand to protect themselves. See Mark McCloskey’s video below.

When they kick in the gate, when the first thing they do is destroy private property and they storm in angry and shouting and threatening. This isn’t a protest. It’s a revolution. It’s just an attempt to inflict terror.

McCloskey said “the only thing that stopped them was my rifle.” McCloskey’s wife had a pistol. He said she doesn’t know much about guns but knows a lot about feeling scared:

Well, you know, we were always obviously upset. My wife doesn’t know anything about guns, but she knows about being scared. And she grabbed a pistol and I had a rifle, and I was very, very careful I didn’t point the rifle at anybody. The only thing that stopped the crowd from approaching the house was when I had that rifle and I was holding there. The only thing that stemmed the tide. I can’t blame my wife for being terrified and for doing what she could to protect what she thought was her life, it was it was, you know, a horrible, horrible event.

Bold mine, and perhaps indicative of a lightbulb coming on somewhere. And hey, you gotta give ’em at least some props for at least having the stones to go out and make a stand all by their lonesomes against a rampaging, thuggish mob that hugely outnumbered them, rather than cowering indoors praying feverishly that the cops would show up in time to save their asses.

However the education of these two privileged libs may or may not progress from here, the first takeaway for all of us, as confirmed by the despicable city attorney’s statement, is this: your government, on every level, is NOT your friend. The second? As the PJM article concludes, this sort of thing is one of the primary reasons we have a 2A in the first place.

There are other edifying developments here as well:

Following the incident people began calling for the McCloskeys to be doxed – resulting in at least one publication removing their address from a 2018 article detailing the extensive renovations they performed on the 1912 mansion.

One of those calling for doxing the McCloskeys, ‘anti-racism executive coach’ Kyle Dennis, restricted his Twitter account after he himself was doxed.

This piece of subhuman garbage called for his fellow Leftwit assholes to “sue them, ruin their businesses, call their kids, call their families” and the like, in a perfectly typical display of shitlib “tolerance” and “compassion.” Hopefully he’ll suffer all those things and much worse himself now that he’s been given a taste of his own rancid medicine.

One of CA’s readers offers a useful AAR, concluding thusly:

Consider the sharply changing trajectory of these riot mob groups if every time they went after someone in a residence, they had to face not only the home owner, but his/her neighbors as well? What if they realized that they now had such on at least one flank, and reinforcements were probably going to start pinching off their avenue for withdrawl? Once they sense that and panic, that will be some security footage to see as they bolt for the gaps. In such circumstance, I would hope that the residents keep their heads and let them flee unmolested.  There is a lesson to even the most obtuse when they realize that the only thing between them and a chalk outline is the good order, discipline and decency of the Average American. It will be a glorious day when some unnamed suburbanite “fixes bayonets” in a possible dystopian future and performs in a way suitable to his forebears.

Lest any of you still have any doubt—which I can’t even BEGIN to imagine at this point—we are indeed at war against Enemies, Domestic—a war which has been slowly, incrementally ramping up from cold to lukewarm to toasty, and will almost certainly wind up going full-on scalding-hot sooner than we might wish. Gird your loins.

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