Money shot!

Wasn’t gonna bother with this one originally, since it’s just not the sort of “news” item I give a crap about ordinarily. But then I read the New York Post’s write-up, which is so wonderful I just can’t help myself. First, you get the archetypical Post grabber-headline.

Woman fires gun at her vagina in cam show crotch shot gone horribly wrong

Heh. You begin to see what I mean right off the bat, I betcher. Right smack in the Post’s wheelhouse, a real gopher ball for those guys. But then, this IS the iconic tabloid that gave us the most famous headline in newspaper history, after all. On to the, umm, juicy bits.

Georgia webcam model Lauren Hunter Daman, 27, redefined “crotch shot” after discharging a firearm into her vagina during an alleged sex stunt gone awry.

“The female had shot herself in the vagina accidentally,” paramedic Brittany Rivers reportedly told responding police officers of the incident, which reportedly occurred on the morning of Nov. 9 at a residence in Thomaston, per a report by the Upson County Sheriff, the Smoking Gun reported.

Later interviews with witnesses revealed that the sex pistol-turned-gunshot victim was apparently alone in her bedroom when the weapon — a 9mm handgun — went off.

Officers were first alerted to firearm fiasco after receiving an “accidental gunshot wound” call from the residence, according to the police report. Upon arriving at the scene, a sheriff’s deputy encountered EMS Rivers, who was holding the unloaded handgun and a spent bullet casing in her hands.

She told the officer that Daman had blasted herself in the netherregions.

Police then conducted interviews with Daman’s three housemates, two of whom were present during the accident, to try and shed light on the alleged boudoir backfire.

Jordan Allen, the reported owner of the firearm, told officers that he was “in the kitchen walking back to the bedroom when he heard the gun go off.” Upon reaching the bedroom, Allen discovered Daman with “a small amount of blood” on her leg, at which point she reportedly informed him “that she shot herself accidentally” and apologized.

Meanwhile, a second witness named Cody Starnes told deputies that his mother Addie Ruth Johnson came into his bedroom and reported that “Daman had been shot.”

Allen revealed to officers how her inadvertent vagino-blasty allegedly transpired.

“Boudoir backfire”? “Inadvertent vagino-blasty”? COME ON, MAN!!! Pure, classic Post-age right there, and no mistake about it.

Now, like most of you miscreants and ne’er do wells out there in CF Land, I wouldn’t give a greasy Biden-shart if every last “newspaper” in America went under and ceased all publishing operations by mid-morning tomorrow—excepting the New York Post. Them, and only them, I would truly hate to see close up shop, and would mourn deeply if they did. The loss of such a wonderful news outlet would be a grievous one indeed, a bona fide catastrophe not just for NYC but for the entire nation. Long may those rascals wave, I say! America needs the Post, now more than ever before.

Fire In The Hole update! Pics of Miss Smokin’ Snatch—the Vented Slotte Girl, Kid Kordite Krotch herself—over at the Daily Mail. I have to admit, she’s rather cute in most of ’em, in that gormless-yet-worldly, slutty-naif way you often come across in the better, more upscale trailer parks. Way more so than I expected she would be, anyhoo.

3

Something to be thankful for

Not just one but TWO (2) proctologically-thorough, hilariously unconstrained fiskings in the inimitable Correia style, the first on L’Affaire Rittenhouse. Towards the close is when the shell is finally cracked to expose the nut of the whole ugly issue.

and may we find a way to get on common ground before more fuses to this powder keg are lit.

-The shit head arguing in favor of fiery riots is upset that the rule of law won out over jury intimidation, and he wants to chide us about “common ground”. We have no ground in common. Your fuckers are the ones who keep lighting the powder kegs, then you get butt hurt when somebody shoots them rather than getting blown up.
 
Basically guys, all the outrage over this trial is because the left is terrified of losing another tool in their toolbox. They love lawless mobs terrorizing you and wrecking your stuff. They love having you too scared of the system to stand up to their dirtbags. So that’s why they are lying their asses off and shedding fake tears for pedophile scum. The jury’s decision didn’t just say Rittenhouse was not guilty, but by extension, it says their useful idiot rioters were guilty, which damages the narrative. And anytime the truth goes against the narrative, the truth gets a bullet to the back of the neck.

The problem the left ran into this time in the court of public opinion was that all of the actual facts of the case were out there for anyone to see. (I really recommend Rekieta Law, who had phenomenal and entertaining coverage with lawyers watching the live stream. I was glued to it for much of the trial). So with the independent media doing the job that regular media won’t, it’s tougher for dishonest fucks like this to spread their lies.

But gullible people still listen to the media and the blue check marks, which was why they were heartbroken on Friday. If you actually believed the narrative nonsense, this case seems like a travesty.

The losing-a-tool notion I’m fully down with, but there’s another angle worth looking at here. I think the thing that wadded their Underoos more excruciatingly tight than anything else is easy-peasy, simple as pie: Teh Sacred Narrative™ was defied, in all sorts of ways, and quite successfully at that. And that, my friends, simply does not fly in Progtardia—not today, not tomorrow, not EVER.

In our second installment, Correia brings the cannonade to bear on a commenter he graciously refers to as “someone I honestly believe means well,” after said someone had accused Larry thusly and to wit:

…When it comes to the left, though, it sometimes feels to me as though you paint with a remarkably broad brush. Speaking as someone who lives in a blue state and who has a fair number of Democrat/Liberal family and friends…’the left’ is not nearly so monolithic as you paint them.

It’s a mistake to imagine all Democrats to be mustache-twirling-evil monsters, IMO. Are there some assholes on the left? Absolutely! But the vast majority are people that I hope you’d get along with just fine if you were chatting across a table with a beer in hand. In my experience, most are genuinely moral people whose greatest flaw is that their idealism is not tempered by realism. And, yes, that flaw can sometimes present in ugly ways…but I like to believe that such conflicts can be better resolved with conversation rather than condemnation.

The assholes on the left might be your enemy, but I don’t think that the entirety of ‘the left’ needs to be.

It worked out for this poor unthinking schlub about how you’d expect.

If the majority of the left aren’t my enemy, the burden of proof is on them, because frankly I haven’t seen jack shit from most of them beyond paying lip service to principles, as the rest of their fellows go about doing whatever horrible thing they feel like, and the ones who claim to be moral sit there silently and let them.

I do paint with a broad brush about the left, because democrats who stand up against leftist insanity are a tiny minority.

Then I get to listen to people like you, who are probably honestly decent people, tell me that you’re not all insane… Great. SHOW ME.

My liberal friends (and yes, I do have a few still, though most tossed me under the bus as soon as there was any societal pressure to do so) will constantly chide me about my words, or my attitude, and go tsk tsk, how rude! But then when people on their side go bat shit fucking insane, they sit there meekly and stand for nothing, because they know the beast they fed will just as easily turn and eat them too.

Besides, as soon as a democrat stands for principle outside of the narrative, they get tossed. Pick any of them in media, punditry, or academia. Any at all. Glenn Greenwald. Tim Pool. Jordan Peterson. Those were all mushy moderates, until they say hey wait, the left is going nuts, and boom, now the left thinks they are the second coming of Satan-Hitler. The party is currently enraged at Sinema and Manchin.

And I’m not alone in this. Most politically alert non-leftists will tell you the same thing. You belong to a cult which will not abide heresy. You want to show us that you aren’t all authoritarian statist trash, DO SOMETHING.

That, basically, is the executive summary. Larry goes on from there to quickly confirm that he was merely clearing his throat, cracking his knuckles, and generally limbering up before getting down to serious business.

Okay. Now for some expounding. Of course not everyone on the left is the same. It’s a big tent. There’s old fashioned liberals, who though they believe in stupid backwards policies, usually tend to have good but naïve intentions. Then there are the progressives, who are basically communist puritans who are actively trying to destroy America. Then there’s the news media, which is just pure Satanic evil. There are also useful idiot NPCs who don’t really have any belief system at all, who just repeat whatever script they are fed that day.

I can say equally insulting things about the right. We’re a big dumb tent too. It ranges from liberty minded people to authoritarians. We even let stupid Mitt Romney in it for some baffling and inexplicable reason. Many in the GOP are trash grifters or NRO cruise ship snobs. However, even though the most loathsome of republicans are corrupt, lazy, shiftless, and stupid, they usually aren’t trying to actively destroy the country.

The worst of both sides are the proverbial swamp creatures. And whether you loved Trump or hated him, there’s no denying that there’s a bloated, elitist, co-dependent bureaucrat/academic/pundit class whose primary motivation is getting and keeping more power for themselves.

So of these various competing factions, why do I typically paint the left with a broad brush?

Because you fucking deserve it.

I see the right fight with itself constantly. The right is its own worst enemy in that respect. That’s why there’s always the joke about republicans snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. Too many of them are passive wusses who wish to maintain the status quo. Their ultimate achievement is to lose with dignity.

The left however gets shit done, because they always put aside their differences and work toward whatever goal their elite wants. This is effective, but also what makes them despicable.

For this next part I’m not talking about the politicians or the punditry. Those guys pick a narrative, no matter how false it may be, and they fucking PUSH. They run with that narrative until it absolutely collapses, then they make up a new narrative and run with it instead.

No. I’m talking about YOU. Regular people. Voters. The guy next door. The masses on the internet. Just average joes. Democrats. Libs. Whatever you call yourself. Anybody who identifies as being on the left.

When your leaders pick a narrative, you drink that Kool-Aid. Even if it’s shit flavored Kool-Aid, most of you smile and tell us it’s the best fucking Kool-Aid you’ve ever tasted. It’s milk from the teat of a magic cherry flavored Unicorn. Nope. It’s shit. You all know it’s shit. But you go along with the narrative anyway.

When the insane progs among you lie their asses off, I’m talking blatant, easily disproven, painfully ham-fisted, fucking LIES…Do you call them out? Do you say, “hang on guys, that’s a little nuts”. Because if you do, the rest of us sure as fuck don’t ever see it. Pick a topic, any topic. It’s always the same.

When people nominally on your side are saying crazy, vile, violent, wacky shit on the internet…do you jump in? When I go out on Twitter yesterday and I find hundreds of posts from fucking scumbags dancing in blood, how come I didn’t see comments from Caring Liberals condemning them? (hell when some prog wrote that an evil motherfucker running over 50 people was karma and that Wisconsin DESERVED it, and I condemned them for it, Facebook banned me for “bullying and hate speech”. Fucking good. That was my 9th 30 day. One more I think I get a free yogurt.)

Anytime there is a breaking news story, there will be legions of howling leftists, and blue check mark idiots, lying their asses off and saying the most horrific things imaginable. And since they literally own social media, they get an official pass while the uppity on the right get officially squashed. We’ve all seen it. From trending hash tags that mysterious vanish, shadow bans, to ultra-biased fact checkers, to Youtube demonetizing wrong thinkers or even getting rid of the thumbs down button.

Yet as your fellow travelers are saying all this horrid shit, where are you? You’re supposedly sane. You claim to have a voice of moderation, but it must be a whisper because we certainly can’t hear it.

And if THAT lengthy excerpt isn’t enough to persuade you to hie thyself thither and Read of it the All, well, I just don’t know what I’m supposed to do with you. Because it only gets more rollicking, more rowdy, more just plain old-fashioned fun from there, most definitely including his pithy description of social media as “…a constant barrage of Common Internet Shit Gibbons.” What can one possibly say about such incandescent brilliance but: “Heh. Indeed.”

8
1

Bee on FIRE!

The Rittenhouse dustup has inspired an awesome burst of genius-level hilarity at the Bee. Some sample headlines, chronologically arranged:

Prosecutor Proves How Deadly AR-15 Is By Accidentally Shooting 7 Jurors

Kyle Rittenhouse Asked To Step Outside And Defend The Courthouse While Verdict Is Being Read

Rioters Flee In Terror As Kyle Rittenhouse Emerges From Courthouse With AR-15

Media Warns Thousands Of Americans Planning To Cross State Lines To Celebrate Thanksgiving

Rittenhouse, Sandmann Agree To Share Joint Custody Of CNN

Prosecutors Find Mail-In Jury Votes At 3AM, Rittenhouse Now Guilty

Last but by no means least, a slightly out-of-order one that requires excerpting to enjoy the full effects.

Rittenhouse Verdict Raises Concerns That It’s No Longer Safe To Beat People To Death With A Skateboard
U.S.—As Americans deal with the aftermath of the Rittenhouse verdict, many are being forced to come to terms with the fact that it’s no longer safe to beat people to death with a skateboard in America.

“I’m devastated. I’m terrified. I don’t even recognize my own country anymore,” said local concerned citizen Gail Piddlesnoot. “How have we gotten to the point in our nation where people can no longer beat someone with a skateboard, or kick someone in the face, or threaten to kill them without risk of being shot? It’s just horrible.”

The American Society of Communist Skateboard Murderers (ASCSM) reports that more and more of their members are dropping out, no longer confident that they can go out at night, burn down cities, and bash in people’s skulls with skateboards unmolested.

“This sets a dangerous precedent,” said Piddlesnoot. “It could be that in a very short time, we will no longer see gangs of marauding skateboard-murdering arsonists roaming our streets at night, and that’s a very sad thought.” 

For Leftards, a thought sad enough to reduce them to hysterics. Which, along with their slavering, unswerving preference that an innocent, entirely admirable teenager be brutally beaten to death by marauding thugs rather than have their own political fanaticism contravened, says all anybody should ever need to know about them—who they are, what they do, and above all else, what the upshot will most assuredly be should we ever be so foolish or inattentive as to allow these fiends to attain the unchecked power over us they so desperately crave.

7

Why they hate him so much

It’s perfectly understandable, when you really think about it.

 

 

 

Aesop has a followup you oughta go take a look at also.

2

Breathes there a man with soul so dead

That a story as delicious as this one doesn’t give him a sharp frisson of delight?

Rodgers In, Roethlisberger Out: ‘Fully Vaxxed’ Steelers QB Out with Covid as Unvaxxed Packers QB Returns to Action

Y’all begin to see what I mean already, I bet.

Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers is cleared to return to action Sunday after sitting out with Covid-19. He drew plenty of controversy after saying he was vaccinated, then having to admit that he wasn’t when he tested positive.

Now, another future Hall of Fame quarterback is out. Pittsburgh Steeler Ben Roethlisberger also claims that he’s vaccinated. We’ll soon know if that’s true since he’s out for Sunday with Covid. According to NBC Sports:

The Steelers will have to try to win their fifth game in a row without their starting quarterback. According to Steelers spokesman Burt Lauten, quarterback Ben Roethlisberger has been placed on the COVID-19 reserve list. He’s out for Sunday’s game against the Lions.

Roethlisberger becomes the second high-profile quarterback to miss a game this month due to COVID. If he’s vaccinated, he’ll be able to return after generating a pair of negative tests at least 24 hours apart. If he’s not vaccinated, he’ll miss at least 10 days.

Last week, Roethlisberger said he’s vaccinated. (Then again, so did Aaron Rodgers.) If Roethlisberger truly is vaccinated, the outcome suggests that he developed symptoms and was tested.

Alll just one more example of the ludicrous fuck-uppery brought to you by the most prolific producers of ludicrous fuck-uppery of all time, our very own Powers That Be. Three groans for ’em, folks.

Y’know, for villainous, evil despots possessed of the finely-tuned code of morality and ethics of a honey badger in rut; the compassion and restraint of Vlad the Impaler; the warmth and sensitivity of Don Rickles; and the simple human decency of Maximilien Robespierre, our would-be lords and masters sure seem to trip over their own dicks a hell of a lot, don’t they? Instead of sinister, near-invincible Bad Guys like, say, Doc Ock, the Green Goblin, Lex Luthor, or Professor Moriarty, these FederalGovCo assclowns more closely resemble Elmer Fudd, Gilderoy Lockhart, and Wile E Coyote. We expect the James-Younger Gang. The goobermint gives us The Shakiest Gun In The West as a stand-in.

I mean, really now. Deadly, bioweapons-lab-grown plagues that aren’t actually all that deadly, more nuisance than plague. World-beating, multirole stealth fighters that won’t fly, aren’t terribly stealthy, are extremely delicate and unreliable, can only carry enough ammo to fling two or three seconds worth of Combat Sadness at its opponent before fleeing the furball to RTB and reload. An extravagantly-financed, high-tech military force whose soldiers are far too dainty and Evolved to fight, under the command of a flag-rank officer corps more intently focused on enforcing the PC catechism than defeating our adversaries, its Navy apparently unable to navigate the seas without slamming into another ship, a dock, or a random terrain feauture. Mandatory electric automobiles entirely incapable of fulfilling the needs of a vast, widely-dispersed populace whose typical daily commute to work and back covers mileage more than sufficient to drain its batteries—cars which will be wholly dependent on a huge network of public charging stations that simply doesn’t exist. Which, as it happens, is of no great importance anyway because the nation’s outdated, overtaxed power grid simply cannot shoulder the increased load, being dangerously strained to keep the lights on already.

All the above is but a small sampling of the neverending cavalcade of stupidity, gross incompetence, unanticipated knock-on effects, and even worse calamities these retards insist on afflicting normal people with…For Our Own Good, natch. And now these Supergenii, these self-proclaimed “Experts,” these shambolic, all-thumbed, pig-ignorant droolcases have outdone themselves at last: a miraculous Vaccine!! so effective, so safe, so all-round beneficial for one and all that they not only had to mount a full-court-press propaganda effort, but also make submitting to it a non-negotiable requirement in order to keep one’s job, leave one’s home, or just generally be allowed to participate in society without being aggressively vilified, attacked, and/or thrown into the Gulag forever to get the concoction into American bloodstreams.

And just look what happens next. Not only did History’s Deadliest Plague fizzle badly on ’em, now the already-wheezing PTB Klown Kar is stalling out from rapidly-mounting evidence confirming that this shady “vaccine” they’ve pimped so frantically is in fact NOT effective, NOT beneficial or even benign, and absolutely, positively NOT SAFE. The propaganda campaign was already floundering, having been nowhere near convincing enough to persuade skeptical Americans to place their trust in a government medical establishment whose treachery and untrustworthiness had long since been established in the original chain of lies and manipulation used to spark the contrived “crisis” nearly two years ago. One can only wonder at what their next desperate gambit might possibly be, and what bonehead move on their part will bring their latest house of cards tumbling down.

I dunno, somehow I always kinda figured that Evil Incarnate would be way more skillfull and capable than these boobs have turned out to be. Oh well, my bad. After nigh on five decades of paying close attention to the antics, habits, and rituals of the ProPol Class in its native environment, I really should’ve known better than that.

4

An idea whose time has DEFINITELY come

It is no longer even remotely possible for me to describe how much I love this man.

DeSantis Threatens To Bus Illegal Immigrants Right To Biden’s Doorstep In Delaware If He Doesn’t Secure Border
Republican Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis said Wednesday he would send illegal immigrants to Delaware if President Joe Biden didn’t secure the southern border.

DeSantis was responding to a question about secret “migrant flights” sent to Florida from areas near the southern border. White House press secretary Jen Psaki previously said Oct. 19 it should be “no surprise” to Americans that the Biden administration is flying migrants to Florida and New York from the southern border.

“If they’re going to come here, we’ll provide buses. I will send them to Delaware and do that. If he’s not going to support the border being secured, then he should be able to have everyone there,” DeSantis said.

DeSantis issued an executive order in September that prohibited Florida state agencies from helping the Biden administration to transport illegal immigrants. DeSantis also said he would be suing the Biden administration for its “catch and release” program.

DeSantis previously characterized the border crisis as an “intentional policy” based on an “open borders ideology.”

“The Biden Administration refuses to abide by the immigration laws of our country, and states bear the brunt of the federal government’s failures,” DeSantis’ office said in a statement to the Daily Caller. “Governor DeSantis is committed to filling that void of leadership and doing everything in his power to protect Floridians.”

“Of course, it would be ideal if the federal government would do its job and use the resources at their disposal to enforce federal law, but since that’s not happening, the state has to step up wherever possible to mitigate the impact of the Biden Border Crisis,” the statement reads.

“If that means sending illegal aliens to Delaware, or even Martha’s Vineyard, so be it. Since Biden believes the open border free for all is good for our country, I’m sure he won’t object,” DeSantis’ office said.

Republican Texas Sen. Ted Cruz introduced the Stop the SURGE Act on Oct. 19, which would establish ports of entry in a number of Democratic-led areas, including Rehoboth Beach, Delaware, Martha’s Vineyard, Governors Island, New York, and multiple locations in California. The bill is intended to “alleviate the massive overload at the southern border,” according to Cruz.

Why yes, as I matter of fact I DID just swipe the whole damned DC article for the above “excerpt.” That’s how much I enjoyed this story. And yes, I do understand that the chances of DeSantis actually following through and making his threat stick for reals hover somewhere between slim and don’t make me laugh, for all sorts of reasons—some of them probably good ones, I suppose. I do not care, not one whit I don’t. The mere fact that America’s Gov is feisty enough to fire so outré and unheard of a shot across Brandon’s shit-smeared bow will do to be going on with as far as I’m concerned.

This brings to mind a couple announcements I need to make, and rat cheer is as good a place as any to make ’em. Numero Uno: I will henceforth be referring to the great and powerful Ron DeSantis not as “America’s Governor,” my own original term of endearment, but as the President of Real America. Nombre Deux: I will henceforth, as and when the mood strikes, be referring to ***”president”*** Brandon not using the standard POTUS acronym, but with the far more apt and insulting FLATUS one, for reasons of side-splitting hilarity which I assume require no further elaboration.

That is all. As you were.

4

Tooting his own horn

An ill wind that blows nobody any good.

He is supposed to be committed to reducing emissions – but when President Joe Biden produced a little natural gas of his own at the COP26 summit, it was audible enough to make the Duchess of Cornwall blush.

An informed source has told The Mail on Sunday that Camilla was taken aback to hear Biden break wind as they made polite small talk at the global climate change gathering in Glasgow last week.

‘It was long and loud and impossible to ignore,’ the source said. ‘Camilla hasn’t stopped talking about it.’

This summer, Johnson praised Biden as being ‘a big breath of fresh air’ on climate change compared to his predecessor.

Appropriately, Biden has urged world leaders to cut methane gas emissions by 30 per cent by the end of the decade. Cows and other livestock contribute substantially to global methane levels.

The White House declined to comment last night.

Oh, I just bet they did. What’s there to say, after all? Here we have this decrepit old near-cadaver, fraudulently installed as “leader” of the “free” world, in so advanced a stage of decomposition and decay he’s utterly helpless to prevent himself from shitting all over the friggin’ Pope—staggering around all befuddled and confused, muttering incoherently, tripping all over every set of stairs he wanders within ten feet of—so who among us is gonna bother complaining about the occasional sounding of the ***”Presidential”*** butt trumpet?

I must admit, as entertaining as President Trump was, the sheer hilarity Flatulent Zombie Brandon brings to the table puts ’em all in the shade. Every successive self-beclownment makes it seem more and more as if God Himself was exacting Heavenly Justice from the raddled old crook for all those years of unpunished kiddie-diddling, graft, and sundry petty crime. In fact, if you listen hard enough you might just hear Him laughing right along with the rest of His Chilluns.

9

How invective is DONE

As DuToit says, this here is the gold-plated, professional-grade stuff.

The Diclofenac pills do actually relieve the pain quite a bit but they, too, are a bit what we used to call spacey and I was up all night, between here and watching the telly. It was a wee small hours, musical interlude, on Channel Four, firstly a film of Liam Gallagher’s new ensemble, Beardy Eye, playing their new album in the Abbey Road studios. Liam is the truly neanderthal, younger brother from Oasis, a thick, grunting Manchester-Irish fuckpig, dumb as shit, you can hear the wind whistling between his ears, if he was any more stupid he’d have to be watered twice a week; makes Manchester United’s Wayne Potato look like a full Mensa meeting, does Liam. Nothing wrong with stupid. There’s lots of people like Liam, their oil just doesn’t reach the dipstick. He’s not as stupid as he looks, mind, because he looks like he was beaten with the Ugly stick and then ate it, ugly as fucking sin, is Liam Gallagher, ugly as a hatfull of arseholes; if your dog had a face like Liam’s, you’d shave its arse and teach it to walk backwards. Stupid, ugly and nasty, that’s Liam Gallagher, a truculent moron, charmless, graceless and entirely without discernible musical talent, a sign, in fact, of Ruin’s corrosion.

His new band, anyway, consists of four competent but unimaginative player-songwriters, and him. And the album’s a turgid lukewarm brew of reworked Oasis numbers which Liam’s brother Noel, every bit as ugly, every bit as unpleasant but a fraction less stupid would have rejected; the  band switch between a dazzling selection of Rickenbaker and Gretsch guitars -funny, isn’t it, how a fiddler will manage with one Stradivarius, Robert Johnson played only a two-dollar guitar, Rory Gallagher the same battered old Strat and yet the current lot switch from one expensive instrument to another between songs, maybe even during songs, the rock’n’roll of Consumerism – to produce the  same sounds, the same chords, the same figures over and over, to sing the same harmonies,  the same shouty, angry, miserable, hateful, retarded adolescent drivel, tripe, every fucking bar of it; Liam, stooped inside his ugliness, howling and frothing his whining, meaningless  doggerel; forty year old men, there oughta be a law against them doing this shit. Liam, rock hero caricature posturing, grunts at one point that this is whaditsallabout knoworramean, fucking keeping on playing and touring, selling the albums, to the kids, otherwise I’d end up working in fucking McDonalds, knoworramean; setting his sights way too high, there, overestimating his personal qualities, I mean, Billy Bragg might get a job in McD’s, on the mop bucket, Paul Weller, maybe, but they wouldn’t let Gallagher within a hundred yards.

Can’t say I know a whole heck of a lot about either Oasis or Liam Gallagher, and probably care even less. However, if I was him and somebody showed me this my career would be well and truly over before I finished reading the first paragraph. I mean, I’ve been on the hurty end of a negative review or three in my life; it smarts a little, then you shrug it off and get on with your day. But this? Jeez Loo-WEEZE, man!! No way could I ever walk out onto a stage again after a savaging that ferocious. Not even at gunpoint, I couldn’t.

2

Brandon drops a deuce

It was bound to happen, and it was always gonna be gut-bustingly hilarious no matter what august personage ended up bearing witness to it.

Internet Dumps Its Best #PoopyPantsBiden Memes As Rumors Swirl Puppet President Sh** Self at Vatican

I never, ever dared to dream I’d live to see a headline as delightful as that, but incredibly, the subhed is better still.

Just a typical day for the Biden administration.

BWAAAAAHAHAHAHAOOHHHHHSHIT!! Ummm, uhhh……

Oh, dammit all. S’cuse me just a sec, folks. CLEANUP ON AISLE THREE, STAT!!!

Joe Biden made headlines in all the worst ways during his meeting with Pope Francis in Rome over the weekend.

After the Vatican cancelled a livestream meeting with Biden over a media dispute, rumors quickly began spreading online that the cancellation was due to Biden…*ahem*…pooping his pants in front of the Holy See.

Thereby providing me with all the excuse I’ll ever need to run this unforgettable scene from the classic film The Pope Of Greenwich Village.


Eric Roberts has never been better than he was in The Pope, nor will he ever be. Same goes for Mickey Rourke with great big bells on, and possibly even veteran character-actor colossi Burt Young and Jack Kehoe too, among several other notables in the cast. Pope was a quiet little gem that came and went quick without much fuss at the box office to remember it by, failing to even make back its production costs if I remember right. Be that as it may, I saw the flick in the theater way back when, was completely charmed by it, and have adored it ever since. Read the book too, more than once, which was a good bit darker and heavier than the movie was, particularly the ending.

But back to, umm, business, shall we say. Richly blessed as we already have been by this kingly gift of a news item, the boons and benisons don’t stop there, playgoers.

Those rumors soon evolved into dank memes, which were dumped all over social media.

A big ol’ butt-load of funnies follow, none of which you will want to miss. I’ll limit myself to just one embed, difficult as the choice was to make.

Looks as if ***”President”*** Brandon has cranked the stink pickle heard ’round the world, a real stinkburger of a faux pas to put the cap on a long and noteworthy career of blunders, gaffes, and general self-beclownment with one he’ll never, ever be able to live down. How perfect is it that, after interminable decades in desperate, obsessive pursuit of an office he always was manifestly inadequate to successfully occupy, the corrupt old bunco artist finally did somehow manage to hoodwink his way into it…only to find it almost certainly the most miserable, excruciating experience of his entire worthless life?

Think of it: to ascend to the Presidency in his dotage—AT LONG, LONG LAST!!!—via a process so thoroughly tainted and corrupt that not just half the country but half the entire WORLD is deeply suspicious of his regime; has absolutely no respect for him or his plainly-usurped mantle of authority; and scornfully revels in his every successive misstep, on the vanishingly few occasions when people bother to even pay attention at all.

Yep, I think it’s safe to say that being POTUS has NOT turned out like ***”President”*** Brandon hoped or imagined it might, he nor his grabby, grubby show-wife either one. Not at all. They had imagined a plush, highly-remunerative sinecure being obsequiously pampered in the White House, the envious gaze of one and all focused on them with awe and admiration for their nation’s esteemed Chief Executive and his lovely First Lady. Instead, the miserable wretches are caught in the iron clutches of living nightmare, a sweaty horror from which there is no awakening.

And now the raddled old cretin has gone and publicly shat himself, in close physical proximity to the fucking Pope, ferchrissakes. Which Pontiff quietly noted this absolute nadir of humiliation, this total loss of all control of one’s person—even as the thick, fetid stench wafted far enough to invade the Papal nostrils all too swiftly—and dropped the decrepit oaf from his busy schedule posthaste, without offering any official explanation. Not that anybody needed one, after the nasty truth had, umm, leaked.

Couldn’t happen to a nicer asshole, if you ask me.

8
3

Losing it

What. The. Actual. FUCK.

Biden Meets the Pope and Utters One of the Most Embarrassing Lines Ever Said by a President

So far, strictly dog bites man stuff. But then ***”President”*** Brandon sez, “Hold my beer.”

Now we know why the Pope canceled a live broadcast with Biden on Thursday. When Joe Biden met with the Pope, he uttered a line that is so awkward that it defies belief.

“You’re the famous African-American baseball player in America.” The fuller context can be watched below…

And then Gropey REALLY went off the rails.

Biden may have meant it as a joke or it was another slip of the tongue about the gift he handed him, but the Pope laughing shows this is what he said. After a 75 minute meeting. This is not the behavior of a serious person, let alone one of the two ‘most powerful Catholics’ in the world.

The remark happened after they exchanged gifts at their meeting on Thursday. Biden spoke to the pope about Satchel Paige, the trailblazing Black baseball pitcher, and made a joke about their ages, CNN reported.

“How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you were? You’re 65. I’m 60,” Biden said.

Annnnnd that’s a wrap, gang. Pudding cups and diaper changes all around!

As reported on Tuesday, the Pope suddenly canceled a live broadcast with the U.S. president without providing an explanation.

Did the Pope take one look at the beleaguered U.S. president and decide that it wasn’t worth the risk going live? Was there a personal disagreement? There were no reasons given.

At this point in Brandon’s™ rapidly-accelerating deterioration, is there really any need for one?

8

Right back atcha, Slick

So how ya liking that sauce there, Gander?

Black students in Georgia were suspended for planning a protest after white students waved a Confederate flag and allegedly used racial slurs
A group of Black students in Georgia was suspended after they planned a protest in response to white students who waved a Confederate flag and reportedly used racial slurs against Black students while at school earlier in the month.

Students at Coosa High School in Rome, Georgia, were captured on video waving the Confederate flag during a spirit day event, but the students did not face disciplinary action from school officials, a student at the school told WGCL-TV.

The incident led other students to plan a protest against racism. The student organizer, Jaylynn Murray, told WGCL-TV that the Confederate flag “is a racist symbol” and “it makes me feel disrespected.”

Aww, did poor widdle snowflake get hims feewings all hurted? Nut up, punk, and get the fuck over it.

A recording of an announcement made over the school intercom last week obtained by the outlet said students should not participate in a protest, warning they’d be “disciplined for encouraging unrest.”

And so they were. Looks like Zero Tolerance for CRT-pimping race-hate mongers is the order of the day at this school, and I for one am all for that.

The protest organizers, comprised of a group of Black, Latinx, and white students, were called to the front office to discuss the demonstration with administrators, the students said, according to the report. During the meeting, the organizers said they argued with school officials over the lack of actions against their classmates who they said used racial slurs against Black students, WGCL-TV reported.

As many MAGA protesters, anti-pAntiFa and -BurnLootMurder counter-protesters, and other Real Americans have learned—via having been beaten bloody while cops looked on and did nothing, or being hauled off and gulagged indefinitely without benefit of legal counsel or bail—life ain’t fair, Buttercup. Deal with it.

Then, the students said administrators suspended only the Black students involved in organizing the protest, even though other non-Black students involved told WGCL-TV they had also been disruptive and argumentative with school administrators.

Ibid, fuckface.

“They didn’t suspend me and I was yelling and loud. It’s because I’m white,” student Lilyan Huckaby told the outlet.

I suggest you cavil and kvetch less and count your blessings more, young ‘un. Might also want to consider cracking a book now and then, which will accrue to your benefit much more than getting suspended, locked up, and/or doing hard time ever will.

“We’re not allowed to wear Black Lives Matter shirts or the LGBTQ flag, but kids can have Confederate flags, and they have said nothing,” a student told the outlet.

Which is precisely as it should be, far as I’m concerned. But hey, here’s a novel idea: how about you kids just drop the whole “protest” gig altogether and spend the school day attending to your fucking studies, eh? I know I run the risk of making the baby Jesus cry by making such an outlandish, impractical, and unfair suggestion, but you kids are in school for a goddamned reason. And “protest” DEFINITELY ain’t it.

A video posted by WGCL-TV’s Hayley Mason on Oct. 8 shows students protesting and shouting: “No Justice, No Peace.”

Ahh, exactly what I was waiting for from these little pukes: the direct and explicit threat of violence and disorder as redress for imaginary grievances. It’s as predictable as the sunrise any time they don’t get their way.

4

WAKE UP, BLACK AMERICA!

You folks know by now that I am resolutely immune to the bizarre ((((((JOOOOOOOOOOO!!!™)))))) obssessiveness currently fashionable in certain other quarters, for reasons I’ve already gone through here plenty enough times. Being more of a William of Occam devotee, I’ve never really had any truck with conspiracy theorizing of any flavor, which admittedly has become a much more difficult mindset to maintain the last two years. But once in a VERY great while, a conspiracy theory comes along that is so damned compelling, so brilliantly conceived, so clearly beyond argument that no sensible soul could possibly do anything other than embrace it without reservation.

This would be one of those.

San Francisco State University Prof Says Jewish Pot is Making Black Men Gay
“It is Jewish genius that has helped…to weaponize the weed.”

Wesley Muhammad believes that the U.S. government and the Jews are using marijuana to make black men gay. The “Pot Plot” is a popular theory in Muhammad’s Nation of Islam cult.

At the Saviours Day Convention in Chicago, an official Nation of Islam event, Wesley Muhammad claimed that, “It is Jewish genius that has helped… to weaponize the weed so that it may effeminize the black male of America. And be clear, it is Farrakhan and the Nation of Islam that is standing in between the total demasculinization of the black man in America.”

Some years back, Wesley Muhammad’s lecture, “How to Make a Homosexual: The Scientific Assault on Black America” was canceled at a Philly black beauty expo because of its hateful content. But what wasn’t good enough for the 23rd Annual International Locks Conference, a black natural hair expo, is unfortunately all too welcome at San Francisco State University.

It’s not too surprising that a black “wholistic” hair expo has higher standards than the most antisemitic university in America. Or that Muhammad fits in so well at SFSU.

“It is clear that the two most powerful lobbies in America – the Jewish and the Homosexual – are hellbent on the information in this lecture, “How To Make A Homosexualm (sic)” NEVER makes it to the public’s awareness,” Muhammad complained on Facebook.

San Francisco State University has however been happy to provide Muhammad with a platform despite no shortage of ethnically Jewish and gay people on the faculty and in the administration.

Wesley Muhammad’s bio at the taxpayer-funded university notes that he is a lecturer in the Africana Studies Department of SFSU’s College of Ethnic Studies. It mentions his publications in the Final Call newspaper of the Nation of Islam hate group, and his book, “Understanding the Assault on the Black Man, Black Manhood and Black Masculinity” which contains thoughtful chapters such as “Why Saggin is Faggin” and “Birth of the Black Man (God)”. 

This one scores straight A’s all across the board: for creativity; for originality; for weaving widely disparate threads into a wholly incoherent narrative fabric; for entertainment value; for sheer bugfuck lunacy, it tops every category. I must confess that I haven’t read all of it yet, mainly because I can only get another ‘graph or so deeper in before keeling over in helpless laughter and having to start all over again.

Damn pesky JOOOOOZ, getting all the brothas hung up on de weeeit ‘n’ fucking dey shit up ‘n’shit! Nomesay’n? Yup, it takes a nation of millions to hold ’em back. WE WUZ KANGS ‘N’SHIT!!!

6
3

Example, set

Gestapo goon squad shows up at Ocker’s door, attempts to intimidate and harrass him by waving a printout of his Fakebook page in his face, which includes a pic they threateningly allege might be legally-actionable evidence of his attendance at an “illegal protest.”

Ocker ain’t having any.

This guy right here gets it. He really does. These two officers of the corrupt law knocked on the wrong door.

A few highlights:

  • First off, he’s laughing throughout this whole scene. Laughing in their faces. (Because this is all a joke.)
  • “So, what are we here for? Are you here to serve me, or?…[laughter] It’s loserish, it’s like, sad. What is this? I mean, where are we going in life? We’ve got the cops coming around here to tell me that I’ve been at a protest six months ago.”
  • “Why are you working for this corrupt government? What are you guys doing? Who are you serving? Are you serving us? Or are you serving the corrupt government and health officials that want no good for you? They’re not there for you.”
  • “Black Lives Matter protest was 2 weeks before that! Was that illegal? You knocking on their doors? You’re not.”
  • “So if I say no [I wasn’t there] you’re not going to give me the paperwork? You’re going to go home?”
  • “You’re asking me if I’m at a protest six months ago. I don’t recall. I do not recall. I don’t recall, I’m sorry. I don’t recall. I don’t recall.”

Absolutely perfect. I hope these officers take something from what they’ve just heard. Probably they wont, though.

Good on ya for seeing those oinkers off proper, mate. A satisfying conclusion, right enough, but the post’s author closes on a sour note.

I’m so thankful to live in the Land of the Free!

Uh huh. One of you guys want to break the bad news to poor deluded Mr Pritchard and dry him out behind the ears, or should I do it?

5

Trump-erview

Mollie and the President In Exile square off, get it on.

What follows is adapted from three interviews of President Donald Trump for Mollie Hemingway’s latest book “Rigged: How The Media, Big Tech, and the Democrats Seized Our Elections,” out October 12.

A few weeks after Biden was inaugurated, I told Trump during a phone call that I was going to write a book about the 2020 election. He invited me to come see him.

That’s how I ended up in Florida in late February, for our first interview. The moment you land at the Palm Beach International airport, people joke about having made it to the Free State of Florida, but that’s exactly how it feels compared to D.C.

My friend Karol Markowicz, a writer who escaped Brooklyn for an area near Palm Beach just so her children could attend school during the lockdowns, describes the area as “The Hamptons, but colorful and risk-taking. Everyone is rich enough that they don’t care what anyone else thinks of them.”

For our first meeting, we sat in the 60-foot long Mar-a-Lago central room. Built by Post cereal heiress Marjorie Merriweather Post, and meticulously restored and renovated by Donald Trump, the gold-leafed ceiling towers above ornate furnishings and tapestries. A massive window overlooks the expansive lawn in front of the ocean. On the other side, the open doors lead out to the large patio where members of the private club there have dinner each night.

At a later meeting I was told that President Trump preferred a seat with its back to the ocean side, but this day he was in the seat facing the ocean. Behind him, an open door showed a room with video equipment and a large TV, playing Fox News.

Baier was interviewing Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell. I would later learn it was the interview in which McConnell told Baier he’d “absolutely” support Trump if he ran again. But Trump was still frustrated with McConnell and how he’d mismanaged the Trump era, calling him a “stupid f-cker.”

Heh. That loud “ka-thump” sound you just heard was scores of genteel NeverTrumpTard “True” “Conservatives” such as David French, the pedo-enabling losers at the Lincoln Project offices, and Bill “The Pillsbury Doughboy, only completely unlikable” Krystol falling over in a dead swoon, so horrified were they by yet another coarse, rude, and of course perfectly accurate blast from the fiend who haunts their deepest, darkest nightmares.

This is a quite long piece, as you might expect from the partial chronicle of an interview spanning three sit-downs with a guy as voluble and irrepressible as Mr Preznit is. It’s also spellbinding—one of those can’t-stop-reading deals that, like a red-hot scorcher of a novel that has you staggering into work next morn all red-eyed, ragged, and zombie-like because it was just too compelling to put the thing down until you got to the last page.

Now as y’all already know, the bloom is pretty much off the Trump rose for me at this point. While I don’t by any means dislike the guy, I nonetheless find myself paying less and less attention these days to his doings and statements than once I did. That said, though, I devoured every word of this Federalist piece in one fell chomp, and enjoyed the meal too—YUUUUGELY, you might say. In addition to being a lively read throughout, Mollie interjects a few spicy tidbits of her own here and there, some of which you might not expect. For instance:

Despite his hyperbolic and imprecise rhetoric, and in our meetings it was regularly that, Trump understood the big picture problems with the 2020 election better than many of his critics. He knew that many of the changes that had been forced through states in 2020 were unconstitutional.

“The constitution of the United States says you cannot change any of your rules, regulations, or anything else, unless you go through the state legislatures,” he said, referring to Article II, Section 1, Clause 2 of the U.S. Constitution, which leaves the power to the state legislature to make the election laws. Pennsylvania had been one of the states that made major changes to election laws, arguably in violation of both the federal and state constitutions.

Trump told me a story about how Sen. Ben Sasse annoyed him right after the 2016 election by being unduly hostile at his initial meeting with the Senate GOP conference. “Terrible senator. This started right at the beginning,” he said, remembering how much time, in his view, the Nebraska senator had spent sniping in the wrong direction. “He’s actually stupid, ‘cause you know the problem with the Republicans is they don’t stick together. You don’t have Mitt Romney and Ben Sasse in the Democrat Party,” he said, while admitting Sen. Joe Manchin, D-W.V., occasionally played a minor version of that role in his party.

A few years later, Sens. Lindsey Graham and Ted Cruz asked Trump to give Sasse another chance. “I say, ‘Keep him out. Guy’s a loser.’ So they said, ‘No, no, no. He wants to make peace.’” Sasse was trying to avoid a primary challenge at the time. “He was like a little boy. He was so well behaved. He didn’t say a word. And they made a case as to why I should let him back into the fold,” Trump said.

Combined with Sasse’s change of behavior to avoid a primary, Trump went on to endorse him. As soon as he won his primary, the old Sasse returned.

Enough with the excerpting, just go read every last tasty word of this. It’s funny, it’s fascinating, it’s lurid and salty in spots—in other words, it’s Trump at his very best. Take my word for it, friends: you will DEFINITELY miss out on something very much worth your while if you shine this one on. Good, good stuff, from start to finish.

2
2

CF Archives

Categories

Comments policy

NOTE: In order to comment, you must be registered and approved as a CF user. Since so many user-registrations are attempted by spam-bots for their own nefarious purposes, YOUR REGISTRATION MAY BE ERRONEOUSLY DENIED.

If you are in fact a legit hooman bean desirous of registering yourself a CF user name so as to be able to comment only to find yourself caught up as collateral damage in one of my irregularly (un)scheduled sweeps for hinky registration attempts, please shoot me a kite at the email addy over in the right sidebar and let me know so’s I can get ya fixed up manually.

ALSO NOTE: You MUST use a valid, legit email address in order to successfully register, the new anti-spam software I installed last night requires it. My thanks to Barry for all his help sorting this mess out last night.

Comments appear entirely at the whim of the guy who pays the bills for this site and may be deleted, ridiculed, maliciously edited for purposes of mockery, or otherwise pissed over as he in his capricious fancy sees fit. The CF comments section is pretty free-form and rough and tumble; tolerance level for rowdiness and misbehavior is fairly high here, but is NOT without limit.

Management is under no obligation whatever to allow the comments section to be taken over and ruined by trolls, Leftists, and/or other oxygen thieves, and will take any measures deemed necessary to prevent such. Conduct yourself with the merest modicum of decorum, courtesy, and respect and you'll be fine. Pick pointless squabbles with other commenters, fling provocative personal insults, issue threats, or annoy the host (me) and...you won't.

Should you find yourself sanctioned after running afoul of the CF comments policy as stated and feel you have been wronged, please download and complete the Butthurt Report form below in quadruplicate; retain one copy for your personal records and send the others to the email address posted in the right sidebar.

Please refrain from whining, sniveling, and/or bursting into tears and waving your chubby fists around in frustrated rage, lest you suffer an aneurysm or stroke unnecessarily. Your completed form will be reviewed and your complaint addressed whenever management feels like getting around to it. Thank you.

CF Glossary

ProPol: Professional Politician

Vichy GOPe: Putative "Republicans" who talk a great game but never can seem to find a hill they consider worth dying on; Quislings, Petains, Benedicts, backstabbers, fake phony frauds

Fake Phony Fraud(s), S'faccim: two excellent descriptors coined by the late great WABC host Bob Grant which are interchangeable, both meaning as they do pretty much the same thing

Mordor On The Potomac: Washington, DC

The Enemy: shitlibs, Progtards, Leftards, Swamp critters, et al ad nauseum

Burn, Loot, Murder: what the misleading acronym BLM really stands for

pAntiFa: an alternative spelling of "fascist scum"

"Mike Hendrix is, without a doubt, the greatest one-legged blogger in the world." ‐Henry Chinaski

Subscribe to CF!

Support options

Shameless begging

If you enjoy the site, please consider donating:

Correspondence

Email addy: mike-at-this-url dot etc

All e-mails assumed to be legitimate fodder for publication, scorn, ridicule, or other public mockery unless specified as private by the sender

Allied territory

Alternatives to shitlib social media: A few people worth following on Gab:

Fuck you

Kill one for mommy today! Click to embiggen

Notable Quotes

"America is at that awkward stage. It's too late to work within the system, but too early to shoot the bastards."
Claire Wolfe, 101 Things to Do 'Til the Revolution

Claire's Cabal—The Freedom Forums

FREEDOM!!!

"There are men in all ages who mean to govern well, but they mean to govern. They promise to be good masters, but they mean to be masters."
Daniel Webster

“When I was young I was depressed all the time. But suicide no longer seemed a possibility in my life. At my age there was very little left to kill.”
Charles Bukowski

“A slave is one who waits for someone to come and free him.”
Ezra Pound

“The illusion of freedom will continue as long as it’s profitable to continue the illusion. At the point where the illusion becomes too expensive to maintain, they will just take down the scenery, they will pull back the curtains, they will move the tables and chairs out of the way and you will see the brick wall at the back of the theater.”
Frank Zappa

“The right of a nation to kill a tyrant in case of necessity can no more be doubted than to hang a robber, or kill a flea.”
John Adams

"A society of sheep must in time beget a government of wolves."
Bertrand de Jouvenel

"It is terrible to contemplate how few politicians are hanged."
GK Chesterton

"I predict that the Bush administration will be seen by freedom-wishing Americans a generation or two hence as the hinge on the cell door locking up our freedom. When my children are my age, they will not be free in any recognizably traditional American meaning of the word. I’d tell them to emigrate, but there’s nowhere left to go. I am left with nauseating near-conviction that I am a member of the last generation in the history of the world that is minimally truly free."
Donald Sensing

"The only way to live free is to live unobserved."
Etienne de la Boiete

"History does not long entrust the care of freedom to the weak or the timid."
Dwight D. Eisenhower

"To put it simply, the Left is the stupid and the insane, led by the evil. You can’t persuade the stupid or the insane and you had damn well better fight the evil."
Skeptic

"There is no better way to stamp your power on people than through the dead hand of bureaucracy. You cannot reason with paperwork."
David Black, from Turn Left For Gibraltar

"If the laws of God and men, are therefore of no effect, when the magistracy is left at liberty to break them; and if the lusts of those who are too strong for the tribunals of justice, cannot be otherwise restrained than by sedition, tumults and war, those seditions, tumults and wars, are justified by the laws of God and man."
John Adams

"The limits of tyranny are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress."
Frederick Douglass

"Give me the media and I will make of any nation a herd of swine."
Joseph Goebbels

“I hope we once again have reminded people that man is not free unless government is limited. There’s a clear cause and effect here that is as neat and predictable as a law of physics: As government expands, liberty contracts.”
Ronald Reagan

"Ain't no misunderstanding this war. They want to rule us and aim to do it. We aim not to allow it. All there is to it."
NC Reed, from Parno's Peril

"I just want a government that fits in the box it originally came in."
Bill Whittle

Best of the best

Finest hosting service

Image swiped from The Last Refuge

2016 Fabulous 50 Blog Awards

RSS feed

RSS - entries - Entries
RSS - entries - Comments

Boycott the New York Times -- Read the Real News at Larwyn's Linx

Copyright © 2026