In the midst of fascist darkness, the lamp of liberty remains lit

An enheartening FauxVid reminiscence.

In the summer of 2020, when the entire nation seemed to have gone mad with fear of the COVID virus, some Long Island retailers gave only lip service to the draconian lockdowns, masking dictates, and “social distancing” requirements. They published the “rules,” but put little or no effort into imposing them on their customers. Those were the ones I patronized. Yet it was all too obvious that most Long Islanders had been cowed by the bellowings from Fauci and the politicians who saw in his pronouncements an opportunity to increase their power over us.

Masking was ubiquitous. People avoided coming close to one another. The floors of supermarkets were festooned with markings about social distancing. Some put up signs making the aisles into “one-way streets.” It was beyond depressing.

But I do remember one bright spot. It occurred in a Walgreen’s pharmacy / general store. I was there to collect a prescription: blood pressure medications. On my way to the pharmacist’s counter I spied a young woman accompanied by three small children. The young woman was shopping as casually as anyone I’d ever seen. Her kids followed her quietly, exhibiting perfect public behavior rarely seen in toddlers today. And none of the four were masked.

The young woman smiled when she noticed me looking at her and her children, for I was unmasked as well. We greeted one another and exchanged some small talk as the children clustered around us. Her English was excellent. It developed that she was a widow, a recent immigrant from Eastern Europe who’d just been granted resident alien status.

Of course the conversation eventually came to the pandemic and the lockdowns. I complimented her on not giving in to the fear campaign. It made her eyes brighten. She smiled and nodded.

“They did this sort of thing to us in my native country,” she said. “Arbitrary rules, pulled out of the air. There wasn’t even an excuse for it, much of the time.”

“It gladdened me to see another person who won’t bend to the madness,” I said.

Her smile acquired a tinge of pride. “I didn’t come here to put up with more of that nonsense,” she said. “I came here to be an American.”

It kept a smile on my face the whole day.

As well it should’ve, Francis. These days people like her are much more truly American than all too many who were born and raised here, alas.

Here legally too, no less—a rarity indeed. Refreshing all the way around, I’d say.

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Seagoing disgrace

Thank God we still have the most powerful, STRAC, well-equipped and -trained, effectively invulnerable military in the world. Right?

RIIIIIGHT?!?

Ummm…yeah, about all that.

Prayers up

And best wishes for a speedy recovery for our dear friend Gretchen, cherished spouse of our brother-from-another-mother Big Country, which good woman is currently languishing in hospital durance vile for a mysterious, sudden-onset affliction of unknown provenance. If you’re the praying type, please do send one up for Gretch yourself. What the hey, it don’t cost anything and can’t hurt, right?

Star Trek: 765874 – Unification

If you’re any kind of Star Trek fan at all, you’re gonna find this one…AWESOME.

A bit under eight minutes of unalloyed beauty, wonder, and joy, that’s what. Involving as it does the Genesis planet of fame and legend, I have to wonder what this might set the stage for, Trek-wise.

(Via Ed Driscoll)

Rolling abortion

The late, unlamented Supervee.

The little engine that couldn’t: A short saga of the Super Vee
When it comes to motorcycles, I like the odd ducks.

I prefer ducks that are actually capable of moving under their own power, but maybe that’s just me.

I’m no match, though, for Paul and Joel at American Cycle Fabrication. You might remember Paul as the man who had those $35 Harleys we wrote about. Recently, I meandered by to see what the boys were up to and what curiosities I could turn up. I walked in the door, and sitting on a bench was the mother lode: a Super Vee.

Nothing gets me going like an abstruse piece of motorcycle equipment, so when I saw this engine parked there, I started pushing people and parts out of my way so I could snap a few photos. You see, I’ve heard of Super Vees, but I’d never actually seen one live and in color. The particular one I saw was a third-generation, the final design ever offered for sale — and the rarest. Approximately 45 were ever sold.

Now as a rowdy, uncut stripling, I read all the biker rags religiously: Iron Horse, my all-time fave under David Snow (CAUTION: Fakeberg link) and my dear departed friend Chris Pfouts; Outlaw Biker, for whom I would later toil thanklessly; American Iron, for whom my tight Pittsburgh brother Mike Seate ditto; Easyriders, the granpappy of ‘em all, and entirely righteous back before it began to suck dead donkey dicks (in its glory days, ER once ran a pic of the illustrious Traci Lords [link is related, just scroll down] on the cover, under the preposterous nom de slut “Suzy Softail,” IIRC); Biker Lifestyle, an also-ran publication about which there really ain’t a whole lot to say other than they always seemed to run more titty-pics than any of the aforementioned rags; last and probably least, Steve Iorio’s Supercycle, which eventually became little more than a vehicle for pimping Iorio’s useless PoS Supervee doorstops.

A pic of the monstrosity in its natural habitat: to wit, propped up on a workbench surrounded by the tools with which the poor schlub who got suckered into buying it would attempt to ascertain why the &^%@#%)*!!! it wouldn’t run.

The rest of the sordid story.

So what is a Super Vee?
In 1983, Harley was not selling whole engines to custom bike builders. Steve Iorio, who owned an outfit called Nostalgia Cycle, wasn’t really digging that situation, so the Super Vee concept was born. The idea was to create an engine using cheap, easily available small-block Chevy parts, that could power a Harley-Davidson motorcycle. By 1985, the engines were released for sale. Iorio was so bold as to suggest that he was going to unseat Harley and put them out of business. He felt Harley was putting the screws to the workin’ joe, and the Super Vee was the common man’s way to fight back: Engine parts could be had reliably and very affordably from any GM dealership or aftermarket auto parts house.

Articles published in Supercycle Magazine as early as 1983 helped get the project off the ground. The engine, though primitive, got rave reviews. Nostalgia Cycle even had a phone number customers could call and hear a Super Vee running! Heady stuff for the 1980s. Nostalgia put together a video (which is pretty funny) extolling the virtues of the new mill. Take a peek. (Bonus points for the first reader to count how many times the narrator says “American.”)

Everything seemed hunky dory, but there were a few problems. First, did you notice in that video that you never hear the engine settle into an idle? That seems a bit strange, right? Secondly, Supercycle was published by the same guy who owned Nostalgia Cycle, Steve Iorio. Steve had dabbled quite a bit in the motorcycle industry. Those initials may be familiar to some — he used to produce springers under the company name SIE, and hung out with Dick Allen, a motorcycle legend in his own right.

Ol’ Steve also went by a few aliases, including “Steve Nelson.” In fact, you can read a lovely article the Los Angeles Times wrote about him — using his fake name! The biggest, most glaring problem with Iorio was his character. The biggest, most glaring problem about the Super Vee was its near-universal reputation of being a complete piece of shit.

For those of you who have never purchased a crate engine, let me fill you in on how the process works. You buy the engine, and sometimes you have to install an ignition and a carb. That’s about it. Install it, and hit the starter button.

The Super Vee was different. It did not run well, if at all. Mating Harley-esque cases to a General Motors rotating assembly presented problems. Critical engine parts didn’t always receive enough oil, yet most Super Vees puked plenty outside the engine. In many cases, engines required some disassembly and some additional machining. Many of the engines required an overhaul simply because of awful quality control during manufacture.

The gruesome saga of Iorio’s exorbitantly overpriced bastard-baby carries on from there; it’s a truly gripping read for any dyed in the wool gearhead-type weirdo, past or present. Won’t do much to bolster one’s naive, childlike faith in the fundamental decency of humanity, I’m afraid. But hey, dem’s da breaks, laddie-buck.

Update! Another aspect of the Iorio melodrama I thought might be worth a mention: I also spent a fair few simoleons on Nostalgia Cycle parts for my trusty old Shovelhead FLH over the decade or so I owned and rode her, mostly at swap meets and such-like dens of iniquity.

I quickly learned that those Nostalgia Cycle (universally reviled amongst my fellow CLT-area scooter trash as “Nostalgia Psycho”) geegaws and gimcracks were without exception El Cheapo crap: flimsy, soft-rubber handlebar bushings; bolt-ons which couldn’t be bolted on thanks to mis-aligned mounting holes; “stainless steel” engine hardware dress-up kits that were neither stainless nor steel; points that didn’t fire, plugs that didn’t spark, filters that didn’t filter, external oil hard-lines without any holes drilled in ‘em; “high flow” oil pumps with no pump gear, etc. etc.

The chrome on all those fancy-shmancy covers—battery, nose cone, breather, primary, drive chain, coil, &c—would begin to blister, flake, and/or peel within no more than two (2) days of the first time it got wet. I was never much of a chrome-cover guy myself—I was more inclined to remove all that shit, box it up, and store it in the remotest corner of the garage. I vastly preferred the lean, mean, bare-knuckle brawler look, as exemplified by my stripped-nekkid, hellaciously fast, screamin’ demon 06 Sporty:

Custom Hot Rod Flatz paint in Desert Sand (hand-sprayed at the shop by Goose, hand-striped and -lettered by the legendary Eddie Brown, Fender motor-mount bottle opener by yrs truly); wrapped header-pipes; no front or rear belt cover; not a single extraneous piece of chrome anywhere that wasn’t factory-installed—what can I say? Except that I surely do miss that sweet, nasty little bitch.

Anyways. Every last bit of Nostalgia Psycho’s teetotal junk, mind, was made from pure Chineseum© in an era when such foreign-parts profanations were strictly verboten—taboo to any self-respecting Milwaukee Iron aficionado, for which unthinking sacrilege the Harley Gods would surely smite down the blasphemer with a quickness. Suffice it to say, after getting bitten like that a cpl-three times, my days of throwing money down the Nostalgia sewer drain were O-V-E-R over.

Updated update! Awright, awright, awright, quitcher crying, ya sissy-Marys; more righteous photos of my beautiful, decidedly non-shiny Sporty below the fold. Although I’ve described her verbally/textually here before, I don’t believe I ever did post any pics, for whatever bizarre reason.

Continue reading “Rolling abortion”

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Bitch slap!

I’m nothing like as avid a fan of the Sweet Science as my brother Jeff is, and never claimed to be. Even so, I’ve been watching boxing since way back when Muhammed Ali was still Cassius Clay. So gimme a break here, I’m not a total dilettante. Be all that as it may, I found this story amusing as hell.

Mike Tyson slapped Jake Paul for stepping on his foot as their pre-fight weigh-in boiled over. 

Seemingly out of nowhere, Tyson smacked Paul in the face at the Las Colinas, Texas, event ahead of their Friday boxing match at AT&T Stadium.

Paul responded, “He hits like a bitch … He must die.”

Tyson claims to have not even heard him.

The smack was Tyson’s reaction to upstart Paul stepping on his toe, which he thinks may have been on purpose.

“I was in my socks and he had on shoes,” Tyson told The Post moments after the weigh-in. “He stepped on my toe because he is a f–king a–hole. I wanted to think it happened by accident. But now I think it may have happened on purpose.

On purpose? You bet your sweet bippy it was—seems like before most any heavyweight bout, there’s usually some hyped-up half-a-fracas or other along these lines at the weigh-in. Still: amusing. Video at the link, for those of you who are into this sort of thing.

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Peanut’s revenge

Speaking to us from beyond the grave.


Can there be any serious doubt about what’s going on here? I THINK NOT. Thank you, Peanut!

(Via Ace)

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Just the facts, ma’am

Another Kumhaula/Doughboy lie shredded in one simple, easy-to-understand graphic.


Thanks to Larwyn for the steer.

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Didn’t see THIS one coming

Bill “The meaning of the word IS” Clinton, telling the God’s honest truth without somebody holding a loaded pistol against his temple, about anything at all? If you’d told me thirty years ago this day would come, I’da laughed in your face and said you were an escapee from the Ha-Ha Hotel, on the lam from the boys with the butterfly nets and those odd jackets with the straps that buckle at the back. I mean, just…just…WOW.


“Show more” workaround:

“And the only time Yasser Arafat didn’t tell me the truth was when he promised me he was gonna accept the peace deal that we had worked out, which would have given the Palestinians a state on 96% of the West Bank and 4% of Israel, and they got to choose where the 4% of Israel was. So they would have the effect of the same land of all the West Bank. They would have a capital in East Jerusalem.

 I can hardly talk about this…. And they would have equal access all day every day to the security towers that Israel maintained all through the West Bank up to the Golan Heights.

All this was offered, including, I will say it again, a capital in East Jerusalem and 2 of the 4 quadrants of the old city of Jerusalem, confirmed by the Israeli prime minister, Ehud Barak, and his cabinet. And they said no. 

And I think part of it is that Hamas did not care about a homeland for the Palestinians. They wanted to kill Israelis and make Israel uninhabitable. 

Well, I got news for them, they were there first before their faith existed.

They were there. In the time of King David, in the southern most tribes, Hadjardia and Samaria.”

The truth, the whole truth, and nuttin’ but the truth. From the mouth of a Clinton, yet. Man alive, “unexpected” doesn’t even BEGIN to cover it.

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Season’s greetings

Never having been all that big on horror movies, I surprised myself when Bram Stoker’s Dracula became one of my all-time favorite films after I first saw it. Propelled by gifted thespian Gary Oldman’s marvelously creepy yet also unexpectedly sympathetic turn as Count Dracul, Coppola’s take on Stoker’s classic vampire tale provides an object lesson in how movies ought to be made. Atmospherics, acting, script, cinematography, SFX, set design, eye of newt, wing of bat, toe of frog—every last ingredient that goes into the cauldron to brew up a genuinely unforgettable cinematic experience is included here.

Plus, in the “Dracula’s brides” scene, TITTIES! Okay, nightmarish blood drinking ghoulie-girl titties, sure. But still. Hey, I ain’t complaining; whatever they’re attached to, it’s always nice to see a comely set. Which, y’know, these most definitely are.

I ran across a full-length, free version of the film on YewToob, and in the course of re-watching a little of it there’s one particular scene that, unfortunately, stands out as being of extraordinary relevance today. Judge for yourself why I say so.

“They’re perfectly nutritious”—sounds familiar, don’t it? Even after more than two decades, Renfield’s deranged blandishment is still as fresh and current as tomorrow’s headlines. As a YT commenter notes, Tom Waits doesn’t act much, but when he does, he’s amazing. SO: you vill eat zee bugs, eh? Yeah, NO. Just look how well that worked out for Mr Renfield, the poor schlemiel.

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Just another Biden fuckup

Not so much, this time out. After all, to him and all the rest of his scum-gargling radical Left ilk, she IS dead now.

Biden suggests very alive former Rep. Gabby Giffords is dead after bizarre remark: ‘Nothing wrong with me’
President Biden appeared to suggest Friday that former Rep. Gabby Giffords (D-Ariz.) is either dead or divorced— and no longer his friend — in an apparent gaffe shortly after he told members of a Native American community that there is “nothing wrong with me.”

“Thank you to Sen. Mark Kelly, a great friend — who also was married to an incredible woman who was my friend,” the 81-year-old president told the Gila River Indian Community, just south of Phoenix. 

Kelly, a Democratic senator from Arizona, has been married to Giffords — who is very much alive — since 2007.

Explanatory backstory for my above punchline—in reference not to Giffords but to Wonder Woman Tulsi Gabbard, which is probably the person Stupefied Jaux thought he was talking about anyway. Or talking TO, perhaps; who even knows anymore with that addled, staggerlicious old feeb. In any event, I’ve had this one sitting in an open tab for a cpl-three days now, and I’m a-gonna use it, by gum.

Tulsi Gabbard announces that she’s ‘joining the Republican Party’ at Trump rally
GREENSBORO, N.C. – Former Hawaii Congresswoman Tulsi Gabbard announced Tuesday that she’s “joining the Republican Party.”

Gabbard, a former Democrat and independent, made the declaration during a North Carolina rally for former President Donald Trump, as the GOP nominee for president – her inspiration for making the party switch – stood nearby.

“The Democrat Party has no home for people like us, but we do have a home in the Republican Party – where we are welcomed with open arms by President Trump and so many of you who love our country,” Gabbard said. 

“And it is because of my love for our country and specifically because of the leadership that President Trump has brought to transform the Republican Party and bring it back to the party of the people, and the party of peace, that I’m proud to stand here with you today, with President Trump, and announce that I’m joining the Republican Party,” she declared. 

Trump, 78, later noted that he wasn’t expecting Gabbard’s announcement. 

“Wow, that was a surprise,” the former president said, calling it a “great honor” to have influenced Gabbard to join the ranks of the GOP. 

Well said, Tulsi, and good on ya for it. Don’t look now, but there may well be another, more apposite reason for Gabbard’s sudden switcheroo, and America’s Only Trustworthy News Source knows what it is.

Tulsi Gabbard Finally Realizes She’s Far Too Attractive To Be A Democrat
WASHINGTON, D.C. — There was great rejoicing in the GOP yesterday as former Democrat Tulsi Gabbard finally realized that she’s far too good-looking to be a Democrat.

Sources close to Gabbard say the realization was a long time in coming, but that she finally decided to switch sides after realizing that she didn’t blend in at all.

“I’d felt very out of place for a while now,” Gabbard said as she announced she was now a Republican. “Everyone around me was either a creepy perv like Walz or a mummy like Pelosi or some uggo like Kamala. And then half of the Dems were just trans and pretending to be the other gender, honestly. I’m just glad to be joining the party with all the lookers, you know? Finally settled that one. Second Amendment, can I get an amen?”

Attractiveness experts agreed that Gabbard no longer had a place among the “sea of androgynous bags” that make up the Democrat Party. “We’re so glad she finally realizes how gorgeous she is,” said attractiveness expert Bubbs Bronson from Fort Wayne, Indiana. “Easy on the eyes, that’s for sure!”

The smokin’ hot, intellectually agile, leggily sexadelic, and unashamedly patriotic Ms Gabbard is certainly a breed apart from the blubberous manatees; bloated bipedal hippopotami; green-bewigged Manwomen; bong-ripping, dorm-dwelling Reluctant Femmes sporting nasty, smelly white-girl dreads; and mange-rife screech monkeys which constitute pretty much the complete taxonomy of feminine “pulchritude” in today’s D卐M☭CRAT Party. Not since the famously fugly Mrs Franklin D Roosevelt have we beheld such a gorge-raising gaggle of fairer-sex gargoyleens. Gruesomighty! Next to these present-day specimens, even Her Herness HILLARY!© Clinton begins to look pretty darn fetching.

So welcome aboard, T, we’re mighty glad to have ya with us adorning the side of good ol’ Truth, Justice, and the American Way; far as I’m concerned, you’re making us look better already. And it’s early days yet; if we can persuade you to reconsider some of your holdover Leftist ideas and opinions in the days and years to come, our joy will be boundless. Not that looks are everything, of course. Then again, they aren’t exactly nothing, either. Certainly, in politics as in many other aspects of life on this here blue marble of ours, they don’t hurt.

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Whither the Renaissance Man?

CF friend KT—she of Saturday Pet Thread renown, among other notable things—hips us to an intriguing VDH column. Sefton linked it earlier this week, but I let it get by me somehow.

We Are in Need of Renaissance People
The songwriter, actor, country/western singer, musician, U.S. Army veteran, helicopter pilot, accomplished rugby player and boxer, Rhodes scholar, Pomona College and University of Oxford degreed, and summa cum laude literature graduate, Kris Kristofferson, recently died at 88.

Americans may have known him best for writing smash hits like “Me and Bobby McGee” and “For the Good Times,” his wide-ranging, star-acting roles in A Star is Born and Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid, his numerous solo albums, especially with then-spouse and singer Rita Coolidge, and the country group super-quartet he formed with Johnny Cash, Waylon Jennings, and Willie Nelson.

In other words, Kristofferson was a rare Renaissance man who could do it all in an age of increasingly narrow specialization and expertise.

At certain times throughout history at particular locales, we have seen such singular people from all walks of life.

Classical Athens produced polymaths like Aristotle—tutor to Alexander the Great, logician, student of music, art, and literature, educator, think-tank founder, biologist, philosopher, and scientist. Later Greeks like Archimedes and Ptolemy, as men of action, mastered six or seven disciplines and applied their abstract knowledge in ways that made life easier for those around them.

But we associate the idea of a “Renaissance man” mostly with Florence, Italy, between the 15th and 16th centuries. In that brief 100 years, the Florentine Republic hosted multi-talented geniuses like Leonardo da Vinci—master painter, sculptor, architect, scientist, engineer, and inventor—best known for the Mona Lisa and Last Supper.

The American Revolution was a similar embryo of Renaissance men. Thomas Jefferson was perhaps the most famous example of unchecked abstract and pragmatic genius displayed in almost every facet of late 18th– and early 19th-century life—main author of the Declaration of Independence, third U.S. President, founder of the University of Virginia, inventor, agronomist, architect, and diplomat.

But Benjamin Franklin may best approximate the model of the Florentine Renaissance holistic brilliance—journalist, publisher, printer, author, politician, diplomat, inventor, scientist, and philosopher.

And here’s where it gets really interesting.

The best American example of the current age is the controversial Elon Musk, a truly Renaissance figure who has revolutionized at least half a dozen entire fields.

Huh. Much as I’ve come to like and admire him, I hadn’t thought about Elon as a modern-day Renaissance Man before, but now that VDH brought it up it seems obvious. Onwards.

No one prior had broken the Big Three auto monopoly of GM, Ford, and Chrysler.

Musk did just that. He exploded all three companies’ dominance with his successful creation of the first viable electric vehicle, Tesla, whose comfort, drivability, reliability, safety, and power rivaled or exceeded the models of all his competitors.

His spin-off battery storage and solar panel companies allowed thousands of families to go off the grid and stay self-sufficient in power usage.

Musk’s revolutionary Starlink internet system—a mere five years old—provides global online service to over 100 countries. Through its some 7,000 satellites, Starlink brings internet service to remote residents far more effectively and cheaply than do their own governments. When natural disasters overwhelm utilities or war disrupts the normality of peace, all look to Musk to restore online reconnections to the outside world.

Musk, almost singlehandedly, transformed the U.S. space program from a NASA 60-year-old government monopoly to an arena of fervent private-public competition. His Space Exploration Technologies Corporation (SpaceX) created a rocket and spacecraft program that has kept the U.S. preeminent in space exploration and reliable satellite launches. When NASA and old aerospace companies falter, the government looks to Musk to bail them out.

Musk, at great personal cost, radically transformed the old Twitter—poorly managed, censorious of ideas and expressions not deemed progressive, and mired in scandal for partnering with the FBI to silence news deemed possibly injurious to Democratic candidates and left-wing campaigns.

His new X replacement is an unfettered platform for free expression. And the more the left abhors their loss of the monopolistic old Twitter’s ideological clearing house, and vows to flee X and start their own new left-wing, censorious Twitters, the more they stay on X.

There’s more yet, and it’s…well, like I said, it’s intriguing.

SIDE NOTE: I haven’t looked in on Hanson for a goodish while—nor American Greatness itself, for whom he used to write a regular column, and perhaps still does—but for many years practically every piece he published was linked and excerpted approvingly here at CF; in particular, his post-9/11 output looking into the Moslem supremacist threat and how the West might most successfully deal with it was reliably excellent—very insightful, well-written, and steeped in the historical perspective. I see now he has his own website, The Blade Of Perseus, which I didn’t know about before. Duly bookmarked and blogrolled.

Update! Just checked and yep, looks like Hanson is still posting over at AmGreat. A little taste of another good piece, this one with an overly optimistic title.

Try a Little Honesty About Israel
Rather than admitting their own role in igniting the Middle East, Biden and Harris now blame the victims of their own incendiary foreign policy.

Honesty? From these congenital liars?!? *snort* Yeah, as if. That’ll be the day.

It was the terrorists of Hamas who surprise attacked and murdered 1,200 Israeli civilians during peace and a Jewish holiday.

Their slaughtering torturing, raping, and hostage-taking revealed a level of precivilization barbarism rarely seen in the modern era.

Israel was simultaneously targeted by rockets from Hamas and Hezbollah that would eventually number over 20,000.

It did not respond to the bloodbath with a full-scale invasion of Gaza until October 27, some three weeks after the slaughtering.

During that interim, for most of the Muslim world and both U.S. Muslim communities and on American campuses, there was rejoicing at the news of slaughtered Jews.

After it all, Biden-Harris lifted sanctions on a hostile Iran, giving it $100 billion in oil windfalls. It begged Iran to reenter the disastrous Iran deal. It abandoned the Abraham Accords. It lifted the terrorist designation from the terrorist Houthis. It restored fungible aid to the Hamas tunnel builders. It gave new aid to Hezbollah-controlled Lebanon.

Israel’s enemies got the Biden message: attack the Jewish state and perhaps Americans for the first time in a half-century may not really mind that much.

And so they did in unison.

 And will go right on doing so, unless and until we finally pay heed to LeMay’s sagacious advice.

Curtislemay1 2x.

Read all of that Hanson piece at AG, folks, and expect to see more of the man ‘round these h’yar parts henceforth. I have been remiss, now I intend to make it up to y’all. What the hey, it’s the least I can do.

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AWWW!

Doesn’t suck? Dude, it ROCKS!

Stuff that doesn’t suck: Pat and Party Cat
The fellow flanking us was filthy, and upon his shoulder sat a small orange kitten, making the chopper pilot look like (the) world’s friendliest pirate.

Spurgeon and I were walking down a dirt path inside Nelson Ledges Quarry Park at the Lowbrow Getdown. We may have been inebriated. We were walking to see Blue Oyster Cult play a little rock ‘n’ roll. We commented to the cat-bearing fellow about how odd it was to see a kitten at a motorcycle event, and then we got the story of a lifetime.

Pat hails from New Jersey, not too far from RevZilla, but we met him in Ohio, hundreds of miles from home. Pat told us a story that would have been unbelievable if he didn’t have the furry proof standing on his shoulder. That adorable bucket of fuzz, by the way, now is known as Party Cat.

“I was coming back from Born Free in California, and we had made it to Nevada,” Pat told us. “I was at this truck stop getting gas, and this little guy just needed help. He was pretty badly burned, so I picked him up and tucked him inside my vest. We’re feeding him regularly now, so he’s doing better, even though he’s sort of living on the road until we get home.

“He’s been eating tuna fish out of those dry-foil packs you can buy, and his burns are pretty much all healed up except for the little spot on his lip. He’s so chill. He just hangs out in my vest when we get on the road. I’ve never met a cat so calm.”

Yes, there’s a pic, yes, it’s great, and no, I wouldn’t dream of not running it.

A real one-percenter

I repeat: AWWW! A cross-country Ironbutt trek all the way from Nevada to Jersey tucked inside a biker’s cutoff, with nary a complaint? That cute li’l booger is a natural-born scooter tramp for sure and certain. Good on ya, Pat, and God bless you and your feline passenger. Another rough, tough biker with a heart of gold, with a lot of gentle, loving kindness at its core. That may come as something of a surprise to people who don’t really know bikers, but not to me—almost all the many I’ve known have been like that.

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Lost America

GREAT piece on the opening-credits sequences of those classic old 70s sitcoms.

Opening credit sequences are a lost art these days. “Lost” because the ritual of collective TV watching is a thing of the past with no real place here in the streaming era. And yes, once upon a time, Network TV watching was a ritual. Like a formal State dinner with seventeen different kinds of spoons and a new glass for each course, Network TV viewing came with a set of rules and an irresistable order. All over America families gathered around the TV set at the appointed time, tuned our sets to the proper channel and waited for the opening notes of the songs we all knew by heart, excited to spend half another hour with characters we’d come to think of as friends.

There was something gratifying too about the idea that all across the country millions of our fellow Americans were doing the same exact thing at the same exact moment. If you are of a certain age, you probably have a memory of getting up during a commercial break on a warm night, maybe to let the dog out, and hearing the sound of the same commercial you were just watching coming from your neighbor’s open window. There was something special about that sense of shared culture, all of us participating at the same time, no matter where or who we were…city mouse and country mouse…doctors, lawyers, electricians and plumbers. There was an irresistable allure to being a part of something magical that would only happen once and then never again.

Streaming TV viewing, by contrast, is a solitary act with no real sense of time or place and where nobody knows your name. By the time a popular 70’s show entered syndication, a committed fan would have watched the series opener one hundred times or more. But memorable credit sequences are more rare now, a function of their incompatibility with the churn-and-burn binge-viewing nature of the streaming model. Easier to just click the “skip” button, or “next episode”, and get on with it.

Instant gratification saves time, certainly, but in the process something is lost that perhaps should not have been. There is value in waiting. Part of what makes Christmas so special is the month long run-up that precedes it. There is also something captivating and mysterious about the idea of being treated to a show. To the knowledge that we can’t speed things up at a whim. That we can’t just skip to the good stuff. It is satisfying in a way that the wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am rhythm of streaming will never be able to deliver. And it’s hard not to wonder if the old ways of network TV might not have been good for us in some critical way we can no longer recall.

Sit down, relax…be still. Someone else is in charge for the next 26 minutes and you can’t skip ahead. You are not in control. If the episode ends in a cliffhanger, you’re going to have to wait a week to find out what happens. And that’s OK.

Everything moves faster now. And while it may be an article of faith at Wharton Business School that the customer is always right, there is no immutable law that says the customer will always be happier, or even better off, once they get it.

“Sometimes you wanna go…where everybody knows your name…and they’re always glad you came…”

The above closing line, of course, comes from perhaps my personal favorite of all the shows featured in the post’s embedded videos:

Cheers, Taxi, KRP, Kotter, M*A*S*H—they’re all here, folks, and it’s one hell of a great ride. No true child of the American 70s will want to miss this one, and definitely shouldn’t.

(Via Stephen Green)

Update! The comments-section discussion betwixt myself and Barry compels me to append a typical, wonderfully silly cab-depot exchange featuring Andy Kauffman as Latka Gravas and the incomparable Christopher Lloyd as the Reverend Jim Ignatowski in Taxi.

Heh. LOVE that show. What kinda disturbs me is that, what with all the things that have slipped from my increasingly unreliable memory over recent years, I can still recall both Kaufman’s and Llloyd’s characters full names without batting an eye.

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