Spanked!

Also: PWNED. And a few other choice things, too. Remember Nazimerican Cindy Bronson, a staff sergeant in the late, lamented US Army? Well, Aesop certainly does, and he has a few things he’d like to say to her. Strong message follows:

Dear disloyal fascist peawit: You are a No-Go at the stations marked Oath Of Service, ROE, and Basic Common Fucking Sense, and are Too Fucking Stoopid to wear any stripes, except the prison variety. Your recruiter should be crotch-kicked for about 3 days straight, by a conga line of prior service former drill sergeants, just to make the point. How you ever got past basic training highlights the sad lack of any standards for military service in this country, and getting all the way to staff NCO rank shows that the Army gives out promotions to fucktards like they couldn’t find such unredeemed shitheads fast enough. You are the poster child for abolishing a standing army, and throwing the lot of you into prison until your initial enlistments are up, or for a term commensurate with your time in-service for people like you. If they drummed you out afterwards, and marched you at bayonet-point across the Bridge Of No Return at Panmunjon into North Korea at the DMZ, and tore up your American citizenship papers behind you, it would be too good for you, and far too light a sentence.

But be advised, if martial law is ever declared in America, Motor Transport Operators (that would truck drivers) like you should be informed that under such likely unconstitutional eventuality, the range will (be) hot in both directions, and you won’t get your weapon out of its holster before you get popped right between the running lights. They won’t name any bridges after you, but you can bet your body parts will be used to decorate one. And what’ll go on any grave of yours, if anyone bothers to shoo away the pigs feeding on whatever’s left, won’t pass for flowers.

But after recent events, you’ll understand why precisely no one in the entire nation is quaking in its collective boots at the fear of what you, or even the entire Army, think you’ll do. You won’t get what you like, and you won’t like what you’ll get. (cf. Lord Cornwallis) {Yet another strike against Common Core grads like SSGT Bulldyke, is that she probably couldn’t come up with the significance of the reference, even with a cellphone, three lifelines, and a shout-out.}

So put away your finger gun, and stick your thumb back into your cockholster, you would-be-Nazi stormtrooper cunt, before you beclown the entire U.S. Army more thoroughly than the events of the last two weeks have already done.

Dude, I mean, just…OUCH. Plenty more raucous bitch-slappery where that come from, all of it equally well-said. I also would like to commend Aesop, a former Marine his own bad self, for a most righteous response to the other night’s post wherein I lauded LTC Stuart Scheller, USMC—a Dogface’s Dogface and bona fide American hero of the old-school variety. Which we don’t seem to making too many of anymore, to our national shame and great loss.

LtCol Scheller, relieved of command of his battalion of Marines, and soon to be court-martialed, and dismissed from the service, started out as a grass-green 2dLt in 2004. He’s thus been fighting this war his entire adult life.

He is now olive green, and hard as crocodile dicks.

And he’s the only active duty Marine officer from 2d Lt to 4-star Commandant Hamhead Berger who can ever walk around with his head held high and his honor clean, no matter what aspersions are cast at him, nor what shenanigans are pulled on him by the chain of command.

He just embarrassed the living hell out of every officer in the Marine Corps, and for that matter, every other service, from full colonel on up, for them ALL being too chickenshit to do what he just did: call out the rent-seeking, ass-licking bullshit they’ve all participated in for any amount of time you’d care to name.

The Marines haven’t seen heroism like this since Capt. Jordan climbed onto an Israeli tank in Lebanon in 1983, and suggested to the colonel commanding that tank that trying to pass his Marine checkpoint without authorization would be career-ending, in a brains-all-over-the-turret sort of way. The tank commander rethought his plan, and departed intact.

LtCol Scheller just did the same thing to Commandant Berger and the entire Marine Corps and DoD chain of command, all the way to Gropey Dopey, and they unhesitatingly chose the path of dishonor. They might as well go full retard, and kill themselves. they can never get the yellow stains out of their pants, and they’ll never get the yellow stripe off their backs.

And for icing on the cake: the bomb that killed a dozen Marines was made with explosives left behind without being blown in place, by the Air Force etc. @$$holes who chickenshitted out of Bagram Airbase in the dead of night.

That right there is Dereliction Of Duty, and 12 counts of Manslaughter under the UCMJ.
UCMJ Article 92: Failure to Obey Order or Regulation (thebalancecareers.com)
UCMJ Article 119 Manslaughter – Court Martial Defense Attorney (ucmjlaw.com)

Call me when the worthless sons of bitches responsible for that colossal homicidal fuckup, from multi-star generals on down, are rightfully prosecuted and justly imprisoned in Leavenworth for the blood of heroic Marines now on their hands.

I ain’t holding my breath.

And no matter what happens to him henceforth for speaking the inconvenient truth, Scheller has a backbone of pure titanium, and balls the size of church bells.

Anyone asked ought to be honored to follow him, even through the gates of hell.

Semper Fi, Leatherneck!

Well said again, and seconded heartily—for whatever that might be worth, coming as it does from a cake-eating civilian like myself.

2

Miracles happen

What a story.

Disfigured Kitten Rescued From The Trash By A 7-Year-Old Girl
Sometimes, we are so busy with life we don’t notice the things that are happening right around us. Maybe we are running late for the next meeting or appointment, or trying to make the subway on time. Either way, I urge you to slow down and enjoy this life; it already goes by so fast. There is no need to make it go by any faster. Unfortunately that is the case in Istanbul. Day in and day out people passed a trash can and avoided the crying coming from inside. Nobody is sure about the amount of time this creature was left in there, it could have been days or even weeks. Thousands of people passed by it though and not one curious person stopped to find out what the horrific cries were. Except for one 7-year-old girl who decided to stop and see what was making all of that noise.

This is a story of love and dedication. Without the will power of that 7-year-old girl, this abandoned cat would be dead. So many of us have passed by tragedy, hurt, and pain every single day and don’t even think twice to stop and help. Our lives are passing by us quickly and I challenge you, myself included, to stop and take in this amazing world we live in.

Amazing is indeed the mot juste. I advise you to grab the full box of Kleenex before you click over; you’ll find it’s awfully dusty in there, whether you’re a cat person or not. Do stick with it till the end, though; the initial photos of the poor little critter are so gruesome as to be quite painful to look at, but the transformation shown in the last shot is nothing short of…well, miraculous. And just like that, the story goes from heartbreaking and tragic to the happiest of happy endings, and will surely warm your heart and lift your spirits—something we could all use more of nowadays, every bit of it we can possibly get our hands on.

(Via MisHum)

3

Shut ’em down

Looking for a way to bring a nation to its knees, force an economy to a dead halt, even topple a tyrannical government using one of the most effective, nonviolent, and quickest means there is? A truckers’ strike is your huckleberry.


Good on ya, mates, and Godspeed. More:

Citizens in Australia are now openly talking about OVERTHROWING THEIR GOVERNMENT and are openly coordinating a first-strike: A nationwide trucking shut down beginning August 31. NOTHING will be transported anywhere until the government comes back under citizen control.

Things are turning very ugly in Australia (and in New Zealand) as government public servants “order” the taxpayers who pay their salaries, to remain locked in homes, NOT TO TALK TO EACH OTHER, and a slew of other ridiculous “rules”  under the guise of a Flu-like illness they call COVID-19.

The people of Australia are fed up with this tyranny and they are now openly moving to forcibly remove the government. They intend to collapse the government by halting all trucking on the continent.  NOTHING will move by truck, anywhere.

Since everything, except electricity and natural gas, MUST, at some point, move by truck, absolutely nothing will be moving in Australia beginning August 31.

No food. No fuel. No medicine. No chlorine to treat public water supplies. No supplies to hospitals. All of it will stop when the truckers strike on August 31.

The truckers know the actual power they have. Without trucks, a country implodes within a week. No country on earth can survive without trucks.

S’trewth, cobber. My brother and I have been discussing this for ages now, both of us wondering over the last year why US truckers haven’t already done it. That fed-up Aussie haulers like this guy are speaking explicitly about “removing the shit government” says one hell of a lot about the level of righteous fury the dimestore dictators have brought down on their own empty heads.

So be it, then—you wanted it, you got it, you rotten sonsabitches.

This is just the start of it. Have a little something, y’know, for inspirational purposes.



Carry on, lads.

8

Biden Bugout: the gift that keeps on giving

Loss of US military gear, civilian personnel, and all respect, trust, and standing in the world: costly. Ongoing mockery and humiliation of ****”President”**** Biden from every corner: PRICELESS.

A former British military commander in Afghanistan said he believes that President Joe Biden should not be impeached, as some Republicans have suggested, but rather court-martialed as a failed commander-in-chief for “betraying the United States of America and the United States’ armed forces.”

In an interview set to air Sunday evening, Colonel Richard Kemp, CBE, formerly in charge of all British military operations in the country, also told Fox News host Mark Levin that he believes Biden’s debacle of a pullout has humiliated U.S. armed forces and Americans in general.

Two GOP House members — U.S. Reps. Marjorie Taylor Greene of Georgia and Bob Gibbs of Ohio — have drafted articles of impeachment against Biden, though last week, House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy, R-Calif., would not commit to impeaching the president if Republicans gained control of the chamber in next year’s midterms, saying he did not want to turn the process into a political exercise.

“I don’t say this lightly and I’ve never said it about anybody else — any other leader in this position. People have been talking about impeaching President Biden,” Kemp said. “I don’t believe President Biden should be impeached.”

“He’s the commander-in-chief of the U.S. armed forces who’s just essentially surrendered to the Taliban,” he added. “He shouldn’t be impeached. He should be court-martialed for betraying the United States of America and the United States armed forces.”

It’ll never happen, obviously. But I love it just the same, and look forward to much, much more of it.

10
1

Serendipity is a thing

It’s been quite the week for serendipitous coincidences around here, seems like. First, after having brought up cousin Reggie in the post on legendary Naval aviator Capt Dale Snodgrass, I was poking around the ol’ Wayback Machine just for grins when what to my wondering eyes did appear but this:

Big fun comin’

At last it can be told: I’m posting this from Strike Fighter Central, where I am now comfortably ensconced in my palatial suite at the BOQ, Bldg 460, #B241, NAS Oceana. Tomorrow morning Cousin Reggie will formally assume command of VFA-83 – the Rampagers. Tomorrow night the band will be doing a show to celebrate Reg’s change-of-command ceremony at the O-club across the street, within easy staggering distance of my lovely rooms. Reggie will be cordially invited onstage to play some guitar with us, but only after I’m certain he’s plastered enough to be rendered incapable of showing my ass up. This is going to be soooo much fun, folks. Having a great time so far – wish you were beer.

Tomorrow: photos!

And photos there were, in the two follow-up posts* just above that one. Also happily included in the Internet Archive page are all the comments, including a lengthy riposte from none other than Regbo himself. There are a good few from Reg’s fellow fighter jocks as well, all of which were as enjoyable for me to read as they were unexpected. The photos I was especially happy to see, since somehow or other I had lost most of them during the Great Migration from my long-deceased iMac onto the one I’m using now.

Then came another very pleasant and unlooked-for surprise when, in the comments to the other night’s post on Billy Beck, the dude pops up in the comments section. Flabbergasted doesn’t even begin to cover it, I assure you.

Which brings us right ’round to this.

The Trump years were a thing to behold. I’ve said many times that he’s a damned fool.

The day he came down the escalator, I knew he could win. When the nominations were cinched at him and Field Marshal Rodham, I knew that he would. I saw him as the answer to Rick Santelli’s original “tea party” rant on CNBC in 2009 (which I saw when he did it, live; I was watching CBNC that hour). She was running a strictly Old School Demshevik campaign in the first decade of real American Idiocracy and hadn’t sunk quite far enough below the level of, say, Hubert Humphrey-type hackery to really herd-up the New Lumpen.

Trump is a New York City lout. He’s a gamer, which is naturally because he grew up in that real estate “market” (if we want to call it that), along with everything that goes into it: the mob and the unions and every variety of government from City Hall to Albany to Washington. So; anyone who understands, for instance, coercive market distortions (von Mises & Hayek, ladies & gentlemen) and “the politics of pull” (Ayn Rand) can easily account for certain aspects of his ethics.

The thing is; he still has a gut-level appreciation of and love for America. Even if America isn’t really him, he’s still really American.

He went wading all that energy of his into D.C. with an attitude like he could deal with those people in dollars, as if that sort of power were the coin of that realm. He didn’t understand that it was a very different sort of power: the well-oiled and loaded .45 at the bottom of every stack of government paperwork, and everything that means.

For instance: he didn’t really understand (if he ever really even imagined) intelligence tradecraft; the applied power of the state in defense of itself.

When I first heard the term, “deep state,” I thought, “That’s pretty good. I wish I’d thought that up.” I soon saw it lensed against the left, which is arguably fair enough (e.g.; in the context of the five year-long coup attempt manifest in all the transparent commie horseshit about him and Russia). What I had mind, however, was the whole state, per se. Like; the entire administratum comprised in all the alphabureaus and their career apparat that’s virtually never subject to electoral politics, even if their appointed chiefs come & go.

Trump didn’t have the sense to take a chainsaw to that much of it, and spent a lot of his time in running fights with it. Now, he likes to fight, but that was a vicious waste of the time that America had left.

His spending was profligate (but now paling into shadow under what’s going on today).

One important thing came in his consequence: he scared the living shit out of the commies. They now have to make some really big plays to get their whole wagon back in the lane of trans-nationalist “transforming of America”. This is, for instance, why we’re seeing the whole disaster at the border: they’re importing voters. Stealing the 2020 election was an emergency maneuver. Pretty well-done, but maybe not well-enough to prevent it from going down correctly in honest history. We’ll see.

In any case, the lines that I drew back in the day are far deeper and one can watch America separating like a microscopic cell budding into halves. “The pace of this thing is picking up.”

Communist China is a monster.

I see anti-lockdown riots all over Europe which, dammit, is actually sort of encouraging.

I don’t know, man. I just hate it all.

People in my generation are unique in all of human history. I saw the peak of human culture: born in America in the 1950’s. Although he had the same outlook as me, my father didn’t see the backside — over the hill — of the American ascent. When he died in 2003, it was all still just barely coasting near the peak. The children, conversely, will never know what it was really like: what got lost.

I’ve seen the whole rise and fall; what it really could have been, and what it’s come to.

I saw some wag or other describe it as “like the fall of Rome, but with cell phones.” Nobody else will ever see anything like it.

That, of course, is but another jolt of hi-watt insight and analysis in the inimitable Billy Beck style from the aforementioned comments, to which I can come up with not a single word that would be worth adding.

* All the pics are good, but the one you really don’t want to miss features myself and Reg onstage, each of us sporting a female undergarment atop our respective head for reasons I was far too drunk then to be able to recall now. In fact, I have to wonder where the hell those thongs even came from in the first place; there were in fact a handful of female swabbies in attendance, but why they would have agreed to doff their delicates for use as decorative headgear I couldn’t say.

Man, what a night that was.

1

Sick burn

This is what it sounds like/When doves generals cry.

The Conservative Case for Cyberbullying America’s Generals

Oh goodie, I like it already.

On July 22, Major General Patrick Donahoe, the Commanding General of Fort Benning, reported from his official Twitter account that he was seeing a “surge” in ICU visits among young soldiers due to Covid. He reported that he would mandate the vaccine if he had the power to do so.

I replied, pointing out that the DOD has lost a total of 26 out of over 2 million personnel in the last year and a half to the virus. In the fourth quarter of 2020, there was a 25 percent surge in suicides across all services. In those three months alone, 26 additional servicemembers took their lives compared to the prior year.

The military’s response to the Coronavirus is almost certainly to blame for the rise. I exited the service in May of 2020, having had plenty of time to witness these policies firsthand. Deployed troops returning home were forced to quarantine for weeks at a time. Masks were required in all public spaces on base. Gyms were shut down. Commanding officers dramatically reduced liberty limits to within only a few miles of base. Those, like me, who were stationed in Camp Pendleton, were prohibited from traveling just 30 minutes south to San Diego during our off hours.

In light of these draconian policies, it is no wonder that troops experienced a surge in psychological illness and suicidal ideation. Turning barracks into prisons is a recipe for problems. Nor did the catastrophic “outbreaks” of Covid materialize. Virtually all servicemembers known to be infected with the virus recover. The handful of Covid related deaths are sad, but they never rose to the level of a crisis. On average, nearly a thousand military personnel die because of training accidents, suicide, and illness every year.

General Donahoe accused me of engaging in “false equivalency” and of downplaying the vaccine, arguing that it was the path to “normalcy.” As the return of mask mandates for both the vaccinated and unvaccinated in cities like Los Angeles attest, this is clearly not true. The real path to normalcy is for military leadership to adjust their risk tolerance. Treating healthy people like biohazards over an illness that has killed two dozen personnel in a force of millions is insane. Those preventative policies have  consequences, too; the surge in depression and suicide among the young is real.

Preventative measures make matters worse. One need only look at the case of Michigan and Sweden. Both territories have an equal population. Yet, Michigan suffered 50 percent more deaths from Covid despite implementing lockdowns, school closures, and mask mandates while Sweden did not. General Donahoe simply brushed these facts aside, deciding instead to call me a member of the “disinformation tinfoil hat team” for pointing them out.

He also tweeted at the university where I am a student, Hillsdale College, and told them to “come get your boy” for questioning the military’s quarantine and lockdown policies. General Donahoe, apparently, thinks the private sector is just like the military, where criticism can be stopped, and careers ended, with a mere snap of the fingers. As the thread attracted more attention, one commenter asked the General “how many wars he’d won.” The General responded by accusing the questioner of “shilling for Putin.” When I asked if Putin was the reason America had lost in Afghanistan, the General blocked me.

Heh. Whiny-ass little bitch.

My interaction with the General serves as a microcosm of the American military’s cultural rot. Here we have a two-star General who spends his days on social media hyping a vaccine for an illness that poses minimal risk to his troops. When pressed on why America can’t win wars and why he embraces policies that treat healthy people like biohazards, his first response is to accuse his critics of treachery and then block them from view.

This is what $693 billion a year buys you: unbridled arrogance from the leaders of a military that can’t win against third world tribesmen armed with small arms and homemade explosives. A significant portion of our military leaders, like General Donahoe, are totally detached from reality. They face no consequences for losing wars or losing troops to preventable suicides. Many of them don’t really command anything at all. They are so ensconced in layers of bureaucrats, staff, operations and logistics shops, briefs, intelligence reports, public affairs officials, and aides that there is usually no danger of the public uncovering their true character, lack of leadership, or empty careers.

The American people need to demand more from their leaders. They need these heroic defenders of freedom to account for their lost wars, failed policies, and ideological radicalism. Twitter gives the people the perfect avenue to do so.

Americans are beginning to realize that their military leaders are failing them. Even if politicians fail to demand better of them, we can and should still make our opinion known. Our generals are, far too often, soft, coddled elites and unthinking ideologues. It is time for the American people to start cyberbullying their generals.

At the very least. And they should by no means limit themselves to just the generals, either. Oh, and we seem to have ourselves an answer on that “won any wars lately?” question, and guess what? Though I’m surprised beyond belief at this, it turns out that—contra Gen Deskwarrior and alllll his Pretty Perfumed Pentagon Princes, diversity might NOT in fact be “our greatest strength” after all.

The Pentagon’s wokester generals, such as chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff Gen. Mark Milley, have touted Critical Race Theory as the military’s focus and a great success story.

The guy under him, though, didn’t have such good news.

According to DefenseOne:

A brutal loss in a wargaming exercise last October convinced the Vice Chairman of the Joint Chiefs Gen. John Hyten to scrap the joint warfighting concept that had guided U.S. military operations for decades.

“Without overstating the issue, it failed miserably. An aggressive red team that had been studying the United States for the last 20 years just ran rings around us. They knew exactly what we’re going to do before we did it,” Hyten told an audience Monday at the launch of the Emerging Technologies Institute, an effort by the National Defense Industrial Association industry group to speed military modernization.
 
The Pentagon would not provide the name of the wargame, which was classified, but a defense official said one of the scenarios revolved around a battle for Taiwan. One key lesson: gathering ships, aircraft, and other forces to concentrate and reinforce each other’s combat power also made them sitting ducks.

“We always aggregate to fight, and aggregate to survive. But in today’s world, with hypersonic missiles, with significant long-range fires coming at us from all domains, if you’re aggregated and everybody knows where you are, you’re vulnerable,” Hyten said.

Even more critically, the blue team lost access to its networks almost immediately.

This is ugly stuff. The military’s top strategic and tactical maneuvers — such as the massing of force  (remember “shock and awe”?) and information dominance from Big Tech, fell into enemy hands like a captured weapon. Long-range missiles made amassed force a liability, as such targets are easy to spot in a big group, while cyber-hacks (notice how those are stepping up?) took care of the rest, leaving the ships virtually useless with no information to go on.

Both things have served the U.S. well in the last wars, from the Persian Gulf War of 1991 to the Iraq and Afghanistan endless wars that followed. Apparently, the long endless wars that never ended until apparently now on Joe Biden’s watch served as a study point for our enemies to observe our strategies and tactics. Leaving the show on for a long time permitted authentic enemies with big firepower, such as Russia and China, all the study time they needed to get a sense of how our military operates.

A big mistake on their part, I’m thinking. After all, the only thing America’s increasingly ineffectual, poorly-led, and PC military might possibly have to teach anybody nowadays is how to lose very, very slowly.

2

OOF!

I have little to no use for polls, as you folks surely know by now. They’re easily rigged to support whatever agenda the pollster wishes to pimp; they’re commonly monkeywrenched by participants who have the same contempt for them I do and respond in prankster-ish fashion; they’re mainly used not to provide honest, reliable snapshots of the public’s general mood, but as tools to leverage political clout and influence. Basically, polls are bunk, and ought to be taken with a bucket of salt, if not ignored entirely.

But I gotta admit, I just love this one.

Wyoming Congresswoman Liz Cheney is the most unpopular Republican in the country among GOP voters, according to a new poll out this month reported by Axios.

While Donald Trump Jr. and Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis led in a survey of prominent Republicans, with a 55 and 54 percent net approval rating respectively, Cheney’s ratings tanked at negative 43 percent.

Um. Well. Okay, then.

Perhaps even better, the accompanying chart shows Senate GOPe “leader” Yertle McTurtle wheezing in at an embarrassing +2. Which makes me think that this is almost certainly the most accurate poll ever taken.

2

Non-event

And suddenly, there may be a reason to care about the fucking Olympics.

Olympic Madness: Women’s Beach Handball Team Fined for Not Showing Enough Booty

“Madness”? Waitwaitwait a minute—is this guy saying he thinks showing more booty is a BAD thing?

Is it just me, or did the Olympics, once upon a time, actually have some credibility? Didn’t the Olympics used to be a gathering place for champions? A moment where nations shined and personal bests were achieved? The first stop on your way to a Wheaties box? I could swear it was not that long ago.

Credibility? From everything I’ve read over the years—which isn’t actually all that much, since I never did give a tinker’s damn about any fucking Olympics—and from what I saw living in Atlanta during the Olympics there back whenever the hell that was, the fucking Olympics have pretty much always been all about the corruption and graft, on the behind-the-scenes business end at least. Throw in whacking great gobs of gooey-eyed nonsense about “promoting international understanding and cooperation” and other such rot and it shouldn’t be too tough to understand my iron determination to avoid the whole emetic shebang.

That being said, can someone pinpoint for me exactly when the Olympics went from being something we all could believe in to the godforsaken sideshow it and the events that surround it are today? Can someone tell me why we should give more than 60 seconds of our time to whatever beleaguered media event is scheduled for Tokyo?

Not really, no. But I’m probably not the guy you wanna be asking.

The Norwegian Women’s Beach Handball team (and btw, what the hell is beach handball and when did it become an Olympic sport? What’s next, shuffleboard?) was fined $1,700 for choosing to wear shorts instead of bikini bottoms during competition. The team noted that the shorts were easier to play in, and I am reliably informed by an actual woman and not a “menstruating person” that during a woman’s period, bikini bottoms can be problematic at best, and disastrous at worst. 

A measly 1700 clams? Hell, I doubt that will be anything like enough to get the Norwegian lassies back into the bikinis again, blast it. Although I will concede the point about the menstruation issue, if somewhat grudgingly.

Although the sanction was played down, the message is clear, whether the league officials approve it or not: People are expected to tune in to the Olympics to see scantily clad women, not athletes. Apparently, there is money to be made by blurring the line between sports fan and hormone-stricken teen. Or dirty old man.

NOW you’re singing my tune, buddy.

On the flip side, track and field Paralympian Olivia Breen was told at the English Championship that her shorts were too short.

Unpossible. Ain’t no such thing. Except on a fat broad, of course.

And as if that were not enough, another Paralympian, Becca Meyers, has withdrawn from the Tokyo games. Meyers is a swimmer and is blind and deaf. She was told she could not bring her caregiver with her. Did I mention that her caregiver is her mother? Never mind Becca Meyers’ needs or her dignity. Let’s get that blind and deaf girl in front of the cameras.

Okay, I will agree that does seem a pretty shitty thing to do. Pointless, petty, and self-defeating also, just a bonehead move all around. One wonders just what the hell those people were even thinking with that one.

So, the Norwegians are sanctioned for not showing enough skin—because, you know, sex and ratings and stuff. The Paralympians are sanctioned for being people and not merely disabled and checking the right box for the IOC, sponsors, and broadcasters. They have no value as athletes or as people. Once again, human beings are made into products.

So, for the sake of the Norwegian Women’s Beach Handball team, Olivia Breen, and Becca Meyers, when the Tokyo games begin, I would tell the IOC and whatever idiot legacy media outlet has the temerity to broadcast the games to go to hell. Go directly to hell.

Oh, I assure you I will be. The last few fucking Olympics came and went with me being completely unaware they were even going on at all, a streak I intend to extend by ignoring them again this year, or whenever it is these fucking Olympics are scheduled to take place. Not having to pretend I give a lumpy fart about the Games is a big ol’ win as far as I’m concerned.

2

Oldie but goodie

Aesop reruns an old post of his from 2018, a remembrance of the first moon landing on its anniversary, and it’s an inspiring read.

Fifty-two years ago today, and just a few hours from now, is the exact anniversary of when 50,000 steely-eyed missile men, crew-cutted geeks with pocket protectors, test pilots, fighter pilots, and hundreds of metric tons of raw testosterone kicked the rest of the world’s ass right to the bottom of the heap, going back to the dawn of time, from the moment that Eagle landed, to when this guy’s foot stepped off the LEM ladder.

Neil Armstrong, ace X-15 test pilot, and mission commander of Apollo XI, became the first man from earth to ever set foot on the Moon, and if and until we ever get people to Mars, he put every explorer in history, and even every guy to follow, below him on what Tom Wolfe correctly called “the top of the pyramid.”

He was there because he and his sidekick, lunar module pilot, and outside-the-box revolutionary thinker Buzz Aldrin had managed to land the lunar module manually, off course, and with mere seconds remaining for landing before a crash-tastrophe, because you don’t fly 250,000 miles to puss out at the last 12 seconds, just for such piddling concerns as running out of fuel.

As I said, a fine read, well worth a look in. But the real reason I brought it up was so I could rerun something my own self, something near and dear to my coal-black heart: the absolutely immortal vid of eternal badass Aldrin poking one of those stupid-ass moon-landing deniers right in the snoot.



Heh. Fatass gets all up in the grill of a bona fide American hero and defames him as “a coward and a liar,” Fatass gets what he has coming to him without further ado. It’s beautiful, that’s what.

I mean, the nerve of that honking, sebacious tub of goo. If Aldrin had shot the bastard down and left him for dead on the sidewalk, I’da stood up and cheered till my throat was sore. As it is, that footage ain’t NEVER getting old as far as I’m concerned, not if I live to be a hunnert and fitty. What’s captured therein is, basically, everything that’s wrong with America today juxtaposed with everything that was once right about it. They just don’t make ’em like Buzz Aldrin anymore, folks, which is precisely why we are where we now are.

4
4

Build a better mousetrap, and the world will be…ejected from your porch

I want one.

U.S.—An American manufacturer has been overwhelmed with preorders for its brand new “ejection porch,” which is specially designed to detect when Biden’s vaccine evangelists are at your door so it can launch them into the stratosphere.

“Excuse me, sir, do you have a few minutes to talk about our lord and savior Dr. Fau– AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” said one door-to-door vaccine auditor after the advanced technology in the porch detected his whiny and annoying government vaccine-evangelist voice and launched him into the sky, above the clouds, and out of sight.

For anyone who can’t afford an advanced and costly porch upgrade, the company is selling handy signs to hang on your porch to tell them to get lost.

In a first for the Babylon Bee, that last line appears NOT to be satire:

NOT SATIRE: Keep Biden’s minions away from your house with this Vaccine Door Sign. Get your actual, very real, not satirical, Vaccine Door Sign. There is limited stock, click here to get yours now!

Here’s the sign:

i want one of those too. Although probably I’ll just make my own and print it at home. IMHO, some MUCH stronger wording is called for here.

4

Let ’em breathe!

So brave. So very, very brave.

Female students go topless to protest gender inequality, public indecency laws
More than 100 students participated in a “Free the Nipple” protest at University of California, San Diego this week.
Female protesters were encouraged to shed their shirts and bras to protest gender inequality and body shaming.

In an effort to fight against perceived gender inequality and body shaming, male and female students at the University of California, San Diego gathered together Wednesday afternoon—completely topless.

More than 1,000 people RSVP’d to the event via a public Facebook page for the “Free the Nipple” event. The event description touted the sit-in as a “peaceful, laid-back, and safe environment.”

“Bring your curiosity, forget your shirts, and most importantly bring your love, compassion, and support for the cause,” the event description read. “Shirts, bra, tops – optional. Show up in whatever you feel comfortable with because it should be your choice!”

Organizers of the sit-in provided snacks, body paint, and masks for any woman who wanted to conceal her identity.

Organizers also forbade students from engaging with hecklers or “opposing groups,” according to the flier.

Opposing groups? Who the hell would oppose a tig ol’ bitty-fest like this, ferchrissake?

Although I must confess, I am of two minds about this particular story. On the one hand, I have no problem whatsoever with hot babes letting ’em breathe. On the other, I have concerns about the kind of sebaceous Leftwit manatees that usually overrun this kind of event and flap their no-fun bags at unwary onlookers like myself hoping to catch some more desirable sorts turning ’em loose in public. Hey, if I wanted to see tits that droop like fried eggs hung from a nail, as Joan Rivers once hilariously put it, I woulda brought my damned hammer along. Seems to me that this next doesn’t bode all that well:

Anni Ma, a UCSD alumna and organizer of the event, said in a video—which contains some nudity—that some think that women shouldn’t go topless because it could be dangerous for females or give men an opportunity to take advantage of women.

“And I’m, like, those are all, like, very valid reasons and that’s why women try to protect themselves, you know, because there are really dangerous people out in the world—it’s not cool—but then I’m like, that shouldn’t be illegal though,” Ma said. “This should be my choice to do what I want to do.”

Ma said in the video that “a group of sorority girls” judged her for going topless in public in the cold.

“Dude, this country makes me like so confused,” Ma said. “Our society is all, like, hopped up on, like, sex on TV, sex on billboards, sex, sex, sex, sex, and then in our private life, oh, don’t do that, that’s disgusting.”

Oof. Dude, like, I’m all like, y’know, wow, are you gonna show us any, like, titties or what? Cuz, like, I ain’t, like, y’know, got all day here, right?

Christ on a crutch.

Oh, and yes, I tried to watch the vid, because of course I did. Unfortunately, the blasted thing took too long to load, and being a raggedy and increasingly irritable old man nowadays I find I don’t care about video boobage—regardless of what kind of whiny nuisance sports it—nearly as much as I once may have. So I moved on, although I did leave the tab open. Who knows, maybe I’ll have something nice to wake up to in the morning.

Alas, despite an encouraging trend, it seems that all might not be sweetness and light in Ta-Ta Land.

The no-bra movement is taking over 2021 fashion — and it’s leaving many women behind
All I wanted was a cute sundress to help celebrate the end of a miserable pandemic winter. As someone who’s been trying to reduce my clothing consumption and move away from fast fashion as much as possible, it had been a while since I’d purchased a staple summer dress that made me feel flirty and feminine. But I was in the mood to treat myself, so I opened the Aritzia website and started to scroll.

To my dismay, the experience wasn’t nearly as pleasant as I had expected. After just a few minutes of looking through the website and seeing dress after dress with an open back, spaghetti straps or excessively low-cut style, I found myself repeatedly wondering, “How the hell am I supposed to wear a bra under that?”

And then it hit me. I thought back to conversations I’d seen on Twitter, articles I’d read from major outlets and styles I’d seen on the streets of Toronto, and I quickly realized my shopping struggles weren’t just a fluke: they were the result of a rising braless movement born out of the pandemic.

Sure enough, a quick search of the term “braless movement” reveals a host of recent articles from major publications like The New York Times and Vogue, and more declaring that “2020 could be the end of the line for the bra.”

One can only hope.

While I’m all for those who feel empowered by this change, as a busty woman who feels most comfortable wearing a bra (usually a wireless one, let’s be honest), I couldn’t help but feel excluded and frankly, inadequate to see countless outlets declare that bras should be banished and to watch bralessness trickle into 2021 fashion trends.

Going braless has rarely felt like an option for me. I went through puberty at a young age and developed breasts before most of my friends, and I have always felt most comfortable when the girls are supported rather than left on their own to succumb to the effects of gravity. Letting them hang free would attract attention not to mention the back pain that would come from carrying around their weight without help. 

Now, I wouldn’t want anyone to think that my full-throated endorsement of the braless trend is in any way meant as a dismissal of the back-pain issue. As a dedicated, lifelong proponent of seeing as much exposed and/or free-swinging breastal real estate as is humanly possible—BUT, at the same time, as a man whose beloved late wife was an honest double-D her own astonishingly fine self—I must acknowledge that this is a very real, umm, sore spot for a lot of women.

Nonetheless, I remain staunchly all for the mass unleashing of dem puppies, just as fast as it can be made to happen. Sorry, ladies, I just can’t help it. I might be old, but I ain’t THAT old. The depressing irony here is, of course, that it’s the gals sporting the full shirtfulls that your average eagle-eyed cis-het boobie enthusiast most hopes will forego the over the shoulder boulder holders. Life just ain’t fair, dammit.

Yes, there are pitchers attached to the above article, although most of them are of underendowed chiquitas, regrettably. Not that I care all that much either way, mind; as my old buddy Pfouts always said, all they really gotta be is tits and I’ll stand up and cheer lustily for ’em.

When I reached the close of that last piece, I was gratified to find a link to another one, which naturally I clicked on over to with a quickness.

On Wednesday, the 56-year-old supermodel shared a video of herself standing under a beautiful waterfall while wearing a string blue bikini that showed off her toned abs. The camera then pans up to show the towering cliff and returns to Porizkova who is all smiles as the water runs through her hair. In her caption, she explained the story behind how she came across the waterfall.

Fans flooded the comments in awe of both the stunning model and waterfall.

“This is so beautiful. Glad you found your way out of the jungle! This country is so awesome. Thanks for sharing a glimpse of it,” a fan wrote.

“Forever young,” someone said.

“You look incredible!!” another person added.

Know what? That she does. That, she damned sure does. But you don’t have to take my word for it.


What, you thought I WASN’T gonna embed the vidya? Not a chance, friend.

After that one, there was a link to yet another titty-related story about Gillian Anderson’s recent vow that she would “never wear a bra again,” which would have made me happy as some clams ten-fifteen years back when she still looked amazing. Now…not so much, to be up-front about it. Gillian says, “I’m sorry, but I don’t care if my breasts reach my belly button.” Unfortunately, from what I’ve seen of her lately they may very well have already, which I’m pretty danged sorry about myself.

Privilege is…

Not what we’re being told. Not. At. ALL.

Privilege is wearing $300 sneakers when you’ve never had a job. Privilege is wearing $200 Apple Airpods while living on public assistance. Privilege is having a Smartphone with a Data plan which you receive no bill for. Privilege is living in public subsidized housing where you don’t have a utility bill and where rising property taxes and rents and energy costs have absolutely no effect on the amount of food you can put on your table. Privilege is having free health insurance for you and your family that’s paid for by working people who can’t afford health insurance for their families. Privilege is having multiple national organizations promoting and protecting your race that’s subsidized by federal tax dollars. Privilege is having access to a national college fund that supports only your race. Privilege is having a television network that supports only your race. Privilege is the ability to go march against, and protest against anything that triggers you, without worrying about calling out of work and the consequences that accompany such. Privilege is having as many children as you want, regardless of your employment status, and be able to send them off to daycare or school you don’t pay for. Still waiting for this “privilege” I’m supposed to have…

According to Nemo, this was a commenter response to a racist Tweet from DC twat Muriel “Bow-wow” Bowser. I’d call it a real howler, but maybe that’s a bad-joke bridge too far even for me.

6

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