TRUMPGASM!
After furiously auto-diddling themselves for six frustrating years with no relief, the Leftard cat-ladies and girly-men have finally achieved one, and the pleasure is so intense they’re positively giddy from it.
Did They Light Up a Cigarette Afterward?
The New York Times enjoyed its long-delayed tantric Trumpgasm so much today that it rolled out the full-page banner headline format usually reserved for the commencement of world wars. (They took the banner down before seven o’clock this morning.) For many of the cat-ladies employed as “reporters” at the once-august paper, it was the first Trumpgasm they’ve ever experienced in a lifetime of emotional displacement, over-eating, and furious knitting of pink polyester hats for the crusade to root out patriarchal wickedness.This fulfillment of a years-long psychodrama, starring the feared and loathed occult persona of a gold-coiffed “Daddy” figure who once presided in the political household, came at the hands of dragon-slayer Manhattan DA Alvin Bragg, archetype of the many long-oppressed victims worked to death in the bilges of our slave ship of state — now turned righteous Woke deliverer of cosmic vengeance!
This oh-so-satisfying climax, of course, is brought to you by the party of hoaxes, flimflams, and mandated death shots, so it’s amusing here on the sidelines to see The Times’s op-ed writers squirm with post-coital pleasure underneath the full-page Trumpgasmic headline. The lead editorial declares: “Even Donald Trump Should Be Held Accountable”— overlooking the utter absence of accountability that has been the norm in every recent insult to the nation’s dignity from wholesale and repeat election fraud, to six years of lawless depravity in the FBI, to overt support of Antifa and BLM street havoc, to the forced, deceitful administration of deadly “vaccines.”
Such pleasure! Such passion! Such carnal bliss! Imagine how hard they’ll get off from watching the eventual Trump perp-walk and incarceration on live TeeWee. Why, it’s ever so much better than the erotic frisson they get from enabling pedophile “transgender” degenerates to proselytize and recruit the children of Normal Americans in defiance of the express wishes of their hapless, helpless parents! As sweetly satisfying, as deeply thrilling as that surely was, Drag Queen Story Hour for eight-year-olds simply could never hold a candle to this!
Oh god oh god oh god, harder, faster, deeper oh pleasepleasepleeeeaaase don’t ever stop!!!*
Heh. What a classic old vid, no? Plenty of folks don’t know it, but Offspring frontman Dexter Holland’s genius is by no means limited to the field of music: among several other interesting achievements, he also holds a PhD in molecular biology from USC, no shit.
Be that little digression as it may, let’s not short-dick another thrill-producing aspect to this development for these hedonistic Leftwit pleasure-seekers: the destruction of the long-moribund Republic, and its final descent into for-real Banana Republic-dom.
Is the title of this piece apocalyptic hyperbole? I wish it were. But everyone in the country and most of the people in the wide world know that Donald Trump has not actually been indicted for the crime of giving hush money to a prostitute. He has been indicted for the crime of opposing the Leftist elites and challenging their control over the political system. For the first time in American history, a politician – indeed, a front-running presidential candidate – has been indicted in order to destroy his political chances. Americans used to take pride in the fact that such things didn’t happen in the United States of America. But that United States of America is over.
Donald Trump has been indicted on the thinnest of charges. House Judiciary Committee chairman Jim Jordan, House Oversight Committee chairman James Comer, and House Administration Committee chairman Bryan Steil recently wrote a letter to Manhattan DA Alvin Bragg, the destroyer of the republic, pointing out that “even the Washington Post quoted ‘legal experts’ as calling your actions ‘unusual’ because ‘prosecutors have repeatedly examined the long-established details but decided not to pursue charges.’”
Even the New York Times on March 9, in an article about how criminal charges were pending against Trump, that “hush money is not inherently illegal.” Working hard to justify the looming pseudo-legal banana republic action of arresting the sitting president’s principal opponent, the Times suggested that “the prosecutors could argue that the $130,000 payout effectively became an improper donation to Mr. Trump’s campaign, under the theory that because the money silenced Ms. Daniels, it benefited his candidacy.” So the whole thing rests on a novel legal theory. Charlie Kirk of Turning Point USA tweeted: “Alvin Bragg lowered 52% of criminal charges in NYC last year to misdemeanors. He just bent over backwards legally to raise the charges against Trump to a felony. WITCH HUNT!!”
That it certainly is, and worse. Former TV and radio host John Cardillo warned: “Don’t downplay the severity of this indictment. There’s still another GJ in NYC, one in GA, and a federal one connected to the Special Counsel investigation. We are watching the political weaponization of our entire criminal justice system. This is a constitutional crisis.”
Much more is coming. Many are saying that the indictment hands Trump the election of 2024, but it’s actually designed to do just the opposite, and the designers are not stupid people. The objective is to prevent Trump from being able to run in 2024, or failing that, to make it impossible for him to win. The average American still has unreflective confidence in our institutions, and will assume from the very fact of Bragg’s indictment, and the others that are certain to come, that Trump must be some kind of criminal. The flimsiness of the cases won’t matter. The public perception will be formed, and that could be enough in himself to make sure that Trump doesn’t return to the Oval Office on Jan. 20, 2025.
Then if all this legal harassment somehow fails, there is still the ballot harvesting, mail-in ballots, and all the rest of the new system that has been carefully put into place and will ensure that neither Trump nor any other dissenter from the Left’s agenda will have a chance to win in 2024.
America’s descent to banana republic status has now been confirmed, but it has been coming on for a very long time. Old Joe Biden signaled it on Sept. 1, 2022, in his infamous red-and-black speech, when he declared: “Donald Trump and the MAGA Republicans represent an extremism that threatens the very foundations of our republic.” For the first time in the history of the United States, a sitting president, such as he is, declared that his principal opponent and his opponent’s supporters were criminals who were outside the bounds of acceptable political discourse. Now the ruling Leftists elites have taken the next step in indicting Trump. After that will come various measures to treat his supporters as if they were terrorists.
This is a dark day for the United States.
Indeed it is. And so much the better for any Trump-horny shitlib. What’s not to like here for such “people,” prithee tell? It’s all deliciously tantalizing grist for the America-hater lust-mill. No wonder they’re all springing a stiffy and splooging in their Underoos over this. I’ll let my old chum and hard-rockin’ colleague Mike Ness have the last word.
For those who might not know already, Ness is a dyed-in-the-wool Leftist his own self, of course. What the hell, he’s a punk-rock musician and celebrity, born and raised in Lost Wangeles, so what else would one expect? I still like the guy; he was always really good to me, despite our glaring political differences.
NOTE: I had originally written this intending it to be today’s Eyrie post, but since Substack doesn’t allow video embeds for some reason, I brought it over here instead. So now I gotta scramble around and find something to write about over there, since IMHO the video embeds sorta pull the whole thing together and make it sing, so to speak.
*Why yes, as a matter of fact I DID write pR0n for a living for a brief spell back when I was in NYC, why do you ask? I make no apology for that; don’t hate me ‘cause I’m beautiful, but as my friend Chris Pfouts pointed out when he first hooked me up with the job, almost all of the Great American Writers from the 20th century on did the same at some point, right up to and including Hemingway and Fitzgerald themselves. Being nothing anywhere near their league, I figured I wasn’t above resorting to erotic fiction for pay myself, if that’s what New York would require of me in order to keep body and soul together.
So there.
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