You’re in the Big House now

Contra all odds and expectations, Democrook Rod Blagojevich DOES appear capable of learning, when he just has to.

Wanna Know the Downside of Diversity? Look at the Prison System.
Disgraced Illinois governor-turned-felon Rod Blagojevich recently appeared on “The Joe Rogan Experience,” detailing his experience behind bars. It’s a fascinating interview. But this clip in particular is especially worth your time…

Keep in mind, that Blagojevich was a blue-state Democrat. He cruised to victory in his last congressional election with a whopping 87% of the popular vote and won his final gubernatorial race with a 10-plus point edge. Until his downfall, he enjoyed vast support from minorities throughout the state.

But according to him, after his first full day in a maximum-security prison, the correctional officers called him in and told him to join an Aryan prison gang ASAP. He had committed the faux pas of socializing with black inmates out on the yard and was told point-blank that he needed to “ride” with the whites.

Otherwise, he was gonna get killed.

Prison is a deeply segregated environment. It’s expected that the whites stay with the whites, the blacks with the blacks, the Latinos with the Latinos, and never should they mix.

So Blagojevich met with the leaders of the Aryan prison gang and ceded to some of their demands: He wouldn’t sit with the blacks or Latinos anymore and agreed to hang with the whites. He didn’t like it, but he did it.

“And then they told me something which I respected,” Blagojevich told Rogan. “They said, look, you’re not in the real world anymore. This is not a place where you could be a civil rights advocate or a civil rights activist. This is a prison. You don’t have the same rights here that you have out there. …So, if you’re gonna sit with somebody outside your race in the chow hall, that’s a direct affront to us and there are measures that we can take to make sure that you don’t do those sorts of things. And I respected the fact that they said it was to keep order, and it was the culture, and pretty much everybody in the prison system accepts it anyway.”

According to the Aryan gang leader, segregation is what kept people safe.

It’s curious, isn’t it? Outside of prison, we keep hearing that diversity is our greatest strength — and to be fair, sometimes it is. Sometimes, when diverse skill sets converge, the sum total is exponentially greater than all the individual parts.

But sometimes, diversity leads to wars, violence, hatred, and death. Even in a tightly controlled, highly regimented place like a prison.

Diversity is a luxury. It’s the icing on the cake of a stable, successful political system. But it’s not a luxury every country can afford. The consequences of getting it wrong are corruption, crime, social disintegration, and a cataclysmic civil war. Look at Afghanistan and remember the haunting quote from P.J. O’Rourke: “The Afghans themselves say that if you put two Afghans in a room, you get three factions.”

That’s not a recipe for stability.

Ahh, but there you go again, assuming that D卐M☭CRATs actually want stability, when they demonstrably do not. Their preference is for chaos, destruction, impoverishment, and immiseration generally. As their heroic icon Lenin is reputed to have said, the worse the better, don’tchaknow. Calls for an update of the old Jimmie Rodgers classic, I do believe.

Update! Worth noting, too, is that when D卐M☭CRATs prattle of “diversity,” they mean not diversity of, as mentioned above, skills and abilities, or of thought, or background, or any other worthwhile things. No, for them, it’s always and exclusively about skin color, and nothing whatsoever else.

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The ever-shifting Climate Change DOOOOOMSDAY timetable

Probably about due for another one, I expect.

FLASHBACK: ABC’s ’08 Prediction: NYC Under Water from Climate Change By June 2015

Amusingly enough, the date on this Newsbusters post is, ummmm, June 2015.

New York City underwater? Gas over $9 a gallon? A carton of milk costs almost $13? Welcome to June 12, 2015. Or at least that was the wildly-inaccurate version of 2015 predicted by ABC News exactly seven years ago. Appearing on Good Morning America in 2008, Bob Woodruff hyped Earth 2100, a special that pushed apocalyptic predictions of the then-futuristic 2015.

The segment included supposedly prophetic videos, such as a teenager declaring, “It’s June 8th, 2015. One carton of milk is $12.99.” (On the actual June 8, 2015, a gallon of milk cost, on average, $3.39.) Another clip featured this prediction for the current year: “Gas reached over $9 a gallon.” (In reality, gas costs an average of $2.75.)

On June 12, 2008, correspondent Bob Woodruff revealed that the program “puts participants in the future and asks them to report back about what it is like to live in this future world. The first stop is the year 2015.”

As one expert warns that in 2015 the sea level will rise quickly, a visual shows New York City being engulfed by water. The video montage includes another unidentified person predicting that “flames cover hundreds of miles.”

Then-GMA co-anchor Chris Cuomo appeared frightened by this future world. He wondered, “I think we’re familiar with some of these issues, but, boy, 2015? That’s seven years from now. Could it really be that bad?”

Turns out, no, Chris. No, it most certainly could NOT. Ed Driscoll chews the shitlib Chicken Littles up, spits ‘em out.

Quick Reminder: Nobody at ABC Personally Takes Their Global Warming Doomsday Predictions Seriously, Either
Obviously, no one at ABC thought so, since the network never moved their corporate headquarters from its tony Upper West Side address, despite attempting to scare the crap out of gullable low information viewers that Manhattan would be flooded in seven years. And notice that the network never cut back any of their entertainment programming or sports coverage, despite the enormous reduction in carbon output and the incredible statement it would make. (Insert the trademarked Insta-Rejoinder here. No, not the one about “I don’t want to hear an other goddamn word about my carbon footprint”; the other one.)

Nor should they take their own horseshit seriously, honestly. Nor should anybody else, for that matter. DEAD GIVEAWAY: Throughout the decades-old End Times panic-pimping, whether it’s global cooling, global warming, or the non-specific Climate Change all-purpose fallback, the solution has always remained the same: more government, higher taxes, less freedom. That’s the tell that NOBODY ought to take these shrieking hysterics at all seriously—about anything, EVER.

Every single last grim “prediction” they’ve puked forth over lo, these many years has been dead wrong—Manhattan/London/the Eastern Seaboard underwater; no more polar ice caps; new Ice Ages bringing solid-sheet glacial ice to mid-Nebraska, perhaps even northern Texas; oceans receding, turning lush, pleasant American coastal areas into barren deserts; spontaneous flash-fires from extreme high temperatures exterminating every living thing on Earth, whether plant, animal, or vegetable; no more water to be found—EVERY. LAST. ONE, just as wrong as wrong gets.

With a record so dismal as theirs, one would think these imbeciles would sooner or later be embarrassed by such ludicrous, neverending failure and slink quietly off into red-faced obscurity, hoping saner sorts would stop pointing and laughing at their stupid asses. Yet still they persist.

Many Westerners profess to be utterly mystified as to the primary appeal of those lifelike robot-girlfriends currently in vogue with young Japanese males, but not me. It ain’t hard to figure out, actually; unlike their human counterparts, the high-tech fuckbots have an “OFF” switch, that’s what the primary appeal is. Kinda reminiscent of the old joke about prostitution: you aren’t paying the hooker for sex per se, you’re paying her to leave afterwards.

Similarly, all Progtards ought to come with an easily-accessible “OFF” switch factory installed, maybe high up on the back betwixt the shoulder blades. Or, if nothing else, a “Volume” knob that can be dialed all the way back to its “SILENT” setting and left that way until they’ve finally run out of breath and stopped yapping and/or yawping.

“Science”? The pathetic jackasses wouldn’t know actual science if it walked up and punched them in the mouth.

Update! Hoo boy, the Climate Change (formerly Global Warming, formerly Global Cooling, formerly The Weather)™ sob-sisters ain’t gonna like THIS.

The Czech division of the International Climate Intelligence Group (Clintel) organized a two-day climate conference in Prague on November 12-13, 2024, where climate scientists declared that the “climate emergency” is over. The conference concluded with a communiqué drafted by the participating scientists and researchers that targeted the climate hysteria promoted by the United Nations body, the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change (IPCC).

The declaration has 18 different point referencing climate science and facts that counter the narratives being pushed by the IPCC and those who want to push their green agendas. I have listed the first six below (which should be familiar to Legal Insurrection readers); the remainder can be found in the copy of the declaration.

  • The modest increase in the atmospheric concentration of carbon dioxide that has taken place since the end of the Little Ice Age has been net-beneficial to humanity.
  • Foreseeable future increases in greenhouse gases in the air will probably also prove net-beneficial.
  • The rate and amplitude of global warming have been and will continue to be appreciably less than climate scientists have long predicted.
  • The Sun, and not greenhouse gases, has contributed and will continue to contribute the overwhelming majority of global temperature.
  • Geological evidence compellingly suggests that the rate and amplitude of global warming during the industrial era are neither unprecedented nor unusual.
  • Climate models are inherently incapable of telling us anything about how much global warming there will be or about whether or to what extent the warming has a natural or anthropogenic cause.

Though I have to say, #17 is a favorite of mine:

Since wind and solar power are costly, intermittent and more environmentally destructive per TWh generated than any other energy source, governments should cease to subsidize or to prioritize them, and should instead expand coal, gas and, above, all nuclear generation.

But, perhaps most importantly, the conference attendees demand the end of persecution of those researchers doing real science who struggle to share their reasonable and reliable findings whenever the data counters the political narratives.

Yowch! Common sense seems to be breaking out all over the place nowadays. The inescapable fact is that the climate has been changing ever since we’ve HAD a fucking climate; always has done, always will do, and there’s precious little, if anything, we puny hoomans can do about it. The arrogance, the narcissism and egomania, required to contend otherwise is nothing short of grotesque, even maniacal. If humankind in fact needs saving from CC (PRO TIP: it doesn’t), it’s a lead-pipe cinch that higher taxes and more government isn’t gonna do the trick. Carlin said it best, I think.

It was perfectly true then, and it remains perfectly true today. If self-absorption, vanity, and melodramatic hyperventilation had monetary value, the stupes would all be richer’n Croesus.

Updated update! The darker side of the Save Gaia NOW© fantasy.

Clean energy could create millions of tons of waste in India. Some are working to avoid that
On the edges of a dense forest in southern India, six women in a small garage are busy stitching cloth bags, pants, hospital gowns and office uniforms with automated sewing machines.

About four years ago, power cuts constantly interrupted their work. Heavy rain disrupted transmission lines and air conditioners pumping in extreme heat exhausted the grid. But now a small black box in a corner of the garage, not much larger than an office printer, keeps their operations running. The battery pack, made from used electric vehicle batteries, keeps their sewing machines and lights on even when the main power is off.

“This battery is a godsend for us,” said H. Gauri, one of the women. “Before the battery came, we’d have to stitch manually when there was no electricity which is exhausting. That is not a concern anymore and we’re able to finish all our orders on time.”

While the group is successful, initiatives like it in India are still few and far between. As the country gets more electric vehicles, solar panels and wind turbines, all aimed at reducing the country’s dependency on planet-warming fossil fuels, energy experts say that India will need to find ways to repurpose the batteries, panels and blades at the end of their lifespans or risk creating millions of tons of waste. If the country comes up with a comprehensive strategy to recycle components, it would both reduce waste and lead to fewer imports of the critical minerals needed for clean power in the future.

Currently, many panels, batteries and other clean energy parts end up in landfills. But others are processed by unlicensed waste recyclers, and some newer businesses and organizations are coming up with ways to recycle the valuable components.

As always with shitlib fever-dreams, the speculative benefits are off in some distant, gauzy Never Neverland-to-come, while the costs are right here, right now, and wildly exorbitant.

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Did someone say “shithole” just now?

Why yes, I believe someone did.

It turns out that Haiti is indeed a shithole
One of my MP buddies had been in Haiti after a hurricane. Disaster relief and all that. Some of the locals had decided to steal a 55-gallon drum of something or other. Just tipped it over and rolled it away, all the way to their shack. Now, this being Haiti, a lot of the roads are dirt roads, which means that my MP buddy and his squad simply had to follow the tracks that are left when one is rolling a 55 gallon drum. And so the did. Just following the tracks for about 500 yards, whereupon they found the 55 gallon drum “hidden” under a pile of garbage, and when my buddy and his squad went to retrieve that drum, they were met with accusations of theft and thuggery. And when my buddy pointed out that they were simply retrieving an item that the locals had stolen, every single person there swore on a stack of bibles that they didn’t steal anything.

Despite the evidence. The blatant, obvious evidence that they had stolen the 55 gallon drum, clearly marked as US property, with the tracks still fresh and clean in the dirt road.

Haiti is a shithole. It’s always been a shithole. The Dominican Republic knows this, which is why they built a fence along their border with Haiti and they refuse to let Haitians into the DR. There is absolutely no reason that we should be letting Haitians into the USA, as the chance of them acculturating and integrating is pretty damn small. If you want to help Haiti, do it in Haiti, but you’re going to have to bring guns, a strong stomach, and the will to be ruthless to the gangs that currently control Haiti. And I don’t see many Americans willing to do that. In order to help Haiti, you have to be willing to kill the cannibalistic gangs. Let me say that louder for the people in the back: In order to help Haiti, you have to be willing to shoot the gangs that are killing and eating people. I don’t see the American public being willing to (do) that.

I don’t see the American sheepul being willing to do much of anything that would inconvenience themselves in even the smallest way. Best thing to do for Haiti is to get the hell out of the nightmarish hellhole altogether, stay the hell out, and studiously ignore its very existence henceforth. Let the feral CHIDs (Cannibalistic Humanoid Island Dwellers) burn their own country to the ground if that’s what they want to do, and to hell with every man Jack of them. The DR obviously understands the proper way to deal with Haiti, which doesn’t involve “helping” in any way, shape, or form. And after all, having been forced by an accident of geography to live next door to these irredeemable animals, who would know better than they?

Lock. Her. UP

Best get the lead out, you sleazy, malignant creep. There’s a clock ticking, y’know.

Bill Clinton: I’m Open to Discussing Preemptive Pardon for Hillary Before Trump Takes Office

Yeah, I just bet you are at that.

Former President Bill Clinton said Wednesday on ABC’s “The View” that he was open to discussing a potential preemptive pardon for his wife Hillary Clinton with President Joe Biden.

Co-host Sunny Hostin said, “Do you think it would be wise of President Biden to preemptively pardon any potential targets? What about your wife, Hillary Clinton? She apparently is on Kash Patel’s list.”

Clinton said, “They’ve got a problem with her because first, she didn’t do anything wrong. Second, she followed the rules exactly as they were written. Third, Trump’s State Department — Trump’s State Department — found — remember how the emails were such a big issue in 2016? Trump’s State Department found that Hillary sent and received exactly zero classified emails on her personal device. It was a made-up phony story.”

Every word of that last ‘graph is a Gott-damn lie, including “and” and “the.”

He added, “So, you know, I guess if Kash Patel is determined to make one up, he could do it, but I think if President Biden wanted to talk to me about that, I will talk to him about it, but I don’t think I should be giving public advice on the pardon power. I think it’s too — it’s a very personal thing, but it is — I hope he won’t do that, Trump, you know. Most of us get out of this world ahead of where we’d get if all we got was simple justice. And so it’s normally a fool’s ear and to spend a lot of time trying to get even.”

Okay, now you’re just making shit up. “A fool’s ear”? DUDE! What the actual fuck does that even mean, anyway? I’ve lived most of my life in the sunny South, was born and raised down here, and figgered I’d heard all the folksy, down-home witticisms by now. But “fool’s ear” is a new one on me.

Gotta admit, though, that Stinkfingers Bill is dead on the button when he says he “shouldn’t be giving public advice,” on anything whatsoever. At this late stage of the game, the only thing YOU ought to be doing, Mist’ Cli-ihn sir (spelled with a “c” and a “u,” of course), is shutting your pie-hole, keeping it that way, and maintaining as low a profile as you possibly can. If you find yourself with surplus free time on your hands these days and can no longer stand being in the same zip code with your godawful “wife”—hey, I feel ya on that one, who in their right mind COULD?—just get busy organizing your collection of nekkid pics of those low-rent Arkansas three-baggers (two to cover her head, one for yours in case hers are ripped, torn, or knocked off by accident) you molested, raped, and/or otherwise abused in a nice, neat photo album, maybe.

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There they go again

The Borking of Pete Hegseth.

PR Primer for Pete Hegseth: How to Salvage His Imperiled Nomination
It’s like being attacked by a swarm of angry bees: You try to swat them away, but there are just too many. Soon, you’re overwhelmed.

That’s what the drip-drip-drip of anonymously sourced attack stories feels like when you’re in the middle of a media maelstrom. And right now, ex-Fox News personality Pete Hegseth is being savaged in the press. His nomination for Secretary of Defense is teetering in the balance.

Hegseth’s current PR trajectory is unfavorable. Today, the Wall Street Journal claimed Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis has been tapped as his replacement.

If Hegseth is forced to withdraw (or is John Tower’d by the Senate), it will dramatically change the narrative of the incoming Trump administration, costing them significant political capital. Instead of being a larger-than-life, Churchillian leader riding into D.C. on a white horse, Trump and his nominees will be portrayed as “The Gang That Couldn’t Shoot Straight” — a hodgepodge band of rogues, deviants, and miscreants who shouldn’t be trusted.

It’ll be Omarosa, Part II.

Sooner or later, Trump will have to hoist the ol’ Hawaiian Good Luck Sign in the Left’s general direction and stick by his “embattled”—by “anonymous sources,”  note ye well; always with the “anonymous sources”—nominees, if he seriously hopes to get anything at all done in the way of draining the foetid Swamp.

It’s like a child who takes to his heels and runs away from a charging dog: you just don’t do it, not unless you want to get your ass bit but good. The one and only time shitlibs ought to see our heels is when we’re kicking their fucking teeth out—in which felicitous circs they’ll not only get to see them, but to taste them as well.

The estimable Salena Zito notes something else of critical importance.


Why, it’s almost enough to make one think that the Left might be *gasp!* lying again. But no, that can’t possibly be right. Can it…? Via Glenn, who also has a resounding testimonial to Hegseth’s all-round good character from the man’s mother, no less.

Update! How’s that “get Hegseth” campaign workin’ out for ya, Proggy? Not too good, it would seem.

‘Zero’ Senate GOPers privately oppose Pete Hegseth for defense pick as he vows to ‘never back down’ amid misconduct claims: sources
“Zero” Senate Republicans are privately opposing Pete Hegseth’s confirmation, sources told The Post on Wednesday, as the defense secretary-designee was making the rounds on Capitol Hill and defiantly proclaiming he will “never back down” in the face of widespread allegations of past misconduct.

“There are zero ‘nos’ right now,” one GOP source familiar with the matter said, ripping smears against the former Army combat infantryman in the press as “BS.”

At least six Republicans, however, have expressed some reservations about President-elect Donald Trump’s nominee, NBC News reported Tuesday, as claims of binge drinking, sexual impropriety and financial mismanagement during his tenure as leader of a veterans advocacy group pile up.

Those six wait-and-see RINO fainthearts are pretty much who you’d expect, to the surprise of precisely no one whatsoever.

Updated update! Oh HELL yeah!

THAT’s how you do it, folks.

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Knobs

For many years now, we’ve had a category yclept “Liberals lie,” which just happens to be one of the most densely-populated categories of all. Turns out, there’s a very good reason for that.



They lie reflexively, automatically, without ever once imagining there might actually be another alternative. As my Grandma always said, they’d rather climb a tree and tell a lie than stand flatfooted on the ground and tell the truth. Or, as I always say: if they couldn’t lie, they wouldn’t be able to speak at all. I’m sure they didn’t mean to, but Blaine Cartwright of Nashville Pussy put it perfectly in the second verse of this blistering rip from their blistering first album, Let Them Eat Pussy.

“Nuttin’ you ever say is true.” A-yup. One minute twenty-nine seconds of pure hate, right there.

Update! Ace hilariously quips:

A man with the unlikely name of, get this, “Hunter deButts.”

I’m pretty sure that was my old CinemaJuggs sign-in.

Hunter deButts is a made-up name like Heywood Jablowmie. This man never existed. Apparently she used ChatGTP for her “research” for The View and ChatGTP is known to sometimes “hallucinate” fictions.

Next up…oh, God only knows what these cretinous curs are going to come up with next.

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Two sets of laws

Gee, how very odd. Why, one might almost think there was a two-tiered (or more) “justice” system in Amerika v2.0 or something.

96.9% of Americans Charged with Hunter Biden’s Gun Crimes Get Jail Time
The DOJ issued a press release in January of last year stating that it is “aggressively pursuing those who lie in connection with firearms transactions.” The ATF and the DOJ are taking a hard line on those who lie when purchasing a firearm. The press release included examples of Americans charged and convicted of the same crime as Hunter Biden. Many wonder if President Biden will pardon these Americans as well.

Shhyeeeaaah, keep dreamin’. Of all people, Gomer Pyle had the right of it all along.

Mordor on the Potomac’s chief orc dropping shit from a great height on Normal American heads all the livelong day, and nary a Sherriff Andy Taylor in sight to come along and put the kibosh on it.

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Above the law

Biden establishes once and for all time what his “word as a Biden” is actually worth.

NYP DECEMBER02.

As if we didn’t already know.

The long investigation of the Biden Crime Family ended when its principal member extended a “full and unconditional” pardon to its front man for any and all crimes that Hunter Biden might have committed or taken part in from January 2014 through Dec 1 2024.

The eleven year pardon by Joe Biden for his son and apparent co-conspirator is unprecedented in both its scope and its brazen shameless criminality. Biden’s pardon begins in the last two years of his vice presidency when the lame duck politician was using Hunter to aggressively monetize his fading political influence by conspiring with oligarchs around the world.

President Biden claimed in a press release that he pardoned his son to protect him from being charged for lying on his gun form and failing to pay taxes. But if Biden had been trying to deal with those two cases, he could have just commuted the sentences or offered a narrower pardon.

The gun form incident took place in 2018 and Hunter stopped paying taxes in 2016. Why start the pardon clock on Jan 2014? And why does it end at the vast last possible moment?

What is Joe Biden really trying to protect against?

2014 was the year that Hunter Biden joined the board of Ukraine’s Burisma, scoring a $1 million payday, and millions more for the Biden Crime Family. It was also the year that Yelena Baturina, the wife of former Moscow mayor Yury Luzhkov sent $3.5 million to a Hunter organization and attended an event with Joe Biden in D.C. It was also the year that a Kazakh oligarch who had just taken over the BTA Bank with whom both Joe was photographed sent six figures.

Were all of these foreign oligarchs sending big checks to a man who had just been discharged from the Naval Reserve over his cocaine use or to his dad who was the one actually in power?

Joe Biden did not pardon Hunter Biden: he pardoned himself.

In addition to the above good stuff, Daniel also has a little something swinging for all the shitlibs weeping with maudlin sentimentality over the compelling power of “a father’s love.”

A loving father would never have used a troubled son as a patsy. He wouldn’t use foreign oligarchs to finance his son’s crack habit. Using your son in a criminal enterprise even while he’s struggling to recover from his brother’s death, is not an act of love, but selfish, cruel and evil.

And a loving father would not have waited to see how the election would play out before pardoning his son. These are not the actions of a loving father, but a cynical and abusive criminal who had always put his own needs and desires ahead of his broken family.

The only reason Joe Biden needed to pardon Hunter was because he used his son as a front man for influence peddling. And not just his son, but multiple other members of his family, even shamelessly using his grandchildren to launder the loot from foreign criminals.

Even as a little boy, Hunter had been abused by his father for political purposes.

And how. Elsewhere, Phil shows us his shocked face.

Heh. As Phil clearly knows, anybody sincerely shocked by this thumbing of the nose at the very concept of impartial justice, rule of law, and basic rectitude is a damned moron. But myself, I think it’s great, I absolutely love that the addle-pated old crook has done this. I mean, seriously now, what better, more appropriate way to put the capper on a half-century of flagrant, unashamed corruption, graft, and privileged amorality than this? it’s so perfect, so fitting, it makes my hair hurt.

Update! Lest we forget, “Hunty” and Pedaux Jaux were hardly the only criminals involved here. No, the corruption was rife throughout every nook and cranny of FederalGovCo, certain corners of it most especially.

It’s important to mention here that the FBI sat on the existence of Hunter’s laptop for one year and silently watched 51 intelligence community people claim that whatever the New York Post was reporting looked like Russian disinformation before the 2020 election. The FBI information operation included leaking stories claiming that Rudy Giuliani, a former Southern District of New York federal prosecutor and mayor of New York, was a Russian stooge because he talked about information on the laptop. For the record, Giuliani, ever the law-and-order guy, was instrumental in getting the laptop into the FBI’s hands. Unfortunately for Giuliani, he was a Trump supporter and therefore needed to be squashed.

As if the election interference and misconduct weren’t enough, the FBI got the tech and media worlds involved in its cover-up operation. The Twitter Files revealed the FBI set up—a pre-buttal of the veracity of the laptop for news, social media, and tech sites at an Aspen Institute confab. The FBI told tech officials and reporters who attended that the Russians were going to operate a “hack and leak” operation and that any stories about the “hacked” laptop should be stopped in their tracks and censored. The news media and tech sites gladly did what they were told. Google, Facebook, and Twitter were all in on the censorship campaign.

But the laptop was real and filled with evidence of “hundreds of crimes,” according to those who matched up the evidence with U.S. criminal statutes, which are included in the Report. The laptop shows, and a U.S. Congressional Oversight Committee confirmed, that the Bidens got money out of countries over which Joe Biden had control including Ukraine, Kazakhstan, Romania, Mexico, Serbia, and Libya. You can check out the timeline of Joe’s grift at the House Oversight Committee’s website. 

If you can read it all without losing your lunch, you ought to get some kind of award for strongness of stomach, if nothing else.

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Brine shrimp

Anybody out there old enough to remember Sea Monkeys?

Sea-Monkeys is a marketing term for brine shrimp (Artemia) sold as novelty aquarium pets. Developed in the United States in 1957 by Harold von Braunhut, they are sold as eggs intended to be added to water, and most often come bundled in a kit of three pouches and instructions. Sometimes a small tank and additional pouches are included. The product was marketed in the 1960s and 70s, especially in comic books, and remains a presence in popular culture.

Ant farms had been popularized in 1956 by Milton Levine. Harold von Braunhut invented a brine-shrimp-based product the next year, 1957. Von Braunhut collaborated with a marine biologist, Anthony D’Agostino, to develop the proper mix of nutrients and chemicals in dry form that could be added to plain tap water to create a suitable habitat for the shrimp to thrive. Von Braunhut was granted a patent for this process on July 4, 1972.

They were initially called “Instant Life” and sold for $0.49, but von Braunhut changed the name to “Sea-Monkeys” in 1962. The new name was based on their salt-water habitat, together with the supposed resemblance of the animals’ tails to those of monkeys.

Sea-Monkeys were intensely marketed in comic books throughout the 1960s and early 1970s using illustrations by the comic-book illustrator Joe Orlando. These showed humanoid animals that bore no resemblance to the crustaceans. Many purchasers were disappointed by the dissimilarity and by the short lifespan of the animals. Von Braunhut is quoted as stating: “I think I bought something like 3.2 million pages of comic book advertising a year. It worked beautifully.”

Good old American marketing genius and ingenuity, that’s what, enhanced by a heaping helping of old school medicine-show hucksterism. What reminded me of it all was this post over at BRM. I tried leaving a comment over at Peter’s joint, but I don’t think it took.

There are several iterations of the Sea Monkeys ad findable via Luxxle search, but the one I remember best is this one:

Please note the disclaimer at bottom left—truth in advertising if ever I saw it, although as a kid I of course would pay it no heed. After refusing for a few years, my Dad finally consented to order some for me back then, and I must say the main result of the whole project was profound disappointment. Be all that as it may, one has to ask: was the world really a more fun place then, or were we all just more gullible? All things considered, this might be the perfect time to embrace the healing power of “and.”

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Wait, did somebody say something?

Oh fer Christ’s sweet sake.

Bolton: Gabbard’s Extreme Views ‘Are on a Different Planet’ — She’s ‘Unqualified’ to Lead Intelligence
Former National Security Advisor John Bolton claimed Tuesday on CNN’s “Newsroom” that President-elect Donald Trump’s pick to lead the intelligence community former Rep. Tulsi Gabbard’s (D-HI) views were “on a different planet.”

Host Jim Acosta said, “We’ve seen Matt Gaetz withdraw his nomination for attorney general. Should Tulsi Gabbard do the same for Director of National Intelligence?”

Bolton said, “Well look, she said many things publicly that I think disqualify her. These are not just because her views are extreme. They are on a different planet. they are the views of somebody who doesn’t understand anything about American interests. And to put her in charge of the office of the Director of National Intelligence I think, is malpractice. I think the effect it will have on foreign governments saying we’re not sharing intelligence with the United States if it’s going to come into the hands of somebody like that.”

He continued, “There are a lot of claims out there that’s why the basic practice of administration after administration and Senate after Senate, for all senior appointees, but particularly people nominated to sensitive national security positions, is before the Senate votes on them. they get a full field FBI background investigation. This is not picking on Tulsi Gabbard or anybody else. This is how you find out what’s really going on with with all of them.”

Bolton added, “This is a bad nominee I think of all the nominees Trump has put forward so far she and Matt Gaetz were in a class by themselves.”

Yeh, yeh, yeh. Whyn’tcha just shut your cakehole already, be of use for once, and go take yourself a flying fuck at a plate-glass window, asshole-eyes. At least THAT would have some appreciable entertainment value, with the likely added benefit of your being sliced to ribbons when the glass shatters as your mortally wounded ass sails through it, resulting in a blood-soaked, butchered meatpile inside the chosen establishment.—ideally, a dingy dive-bar in late afternoon, not too crowded, but by no means totally deserted either. A library; a vintage clothing store; a cigar/tobacco shop; a bakery; a bodega—none of those would have quite the same ooomph as a good old-school gin joint, in my view. At least in one of those alcoholically-correct barrooms, there’ll be plenty of day-drinking Old Soaks on hand as eyewitnesses for the blessed event.

Regardless of its commercial focus, the owner of said establishment doubtless won’t be too terribly chuffed at needing to get his broken window replaced all of a sudden-like, let alone the timbers-shivering prospect of trying to wheedle one of his lowlier employees—a barback, a busboy, a dishwasher, let’s say—into rolling out the mop and bucket to swab up the nightmarish lake of congealing gore and/or gobbets of shredded flesh without him/her huffily downing tools and stalking out sans the customary two weeks’ notice at the first intimation of an assignment as onerous as that.

On further reflection, however, the proprietor will fast come to realize that the former NSA’s spectacular swan-dive swan song was well worth the attendant expense, effort, and inconvenience for himself and his luckless lower-echelon staff. Upon such improbable wings have great fortunes, reputations, even legends taken flight and soared off into American history. Ask any owner of a Midtown Manhattan eatery in which a prominent Mafioso got whacked before a roomful of diners during a busy dinner shot about how said whacking affected his bottom line ever after, he’ll tell ya all about it: reservations booked solid for a year in advance; walk-in customers standing in lines at the front entrance that extend for six or seven long Avenue blocks; three-figure cash bribes slipped to maitre d’s to purchase a shitty table by the door to the kitchen; SRO in the bar area with patrons jammed in four deep to while away the hours with a high-octane libation or three as they wait for their ticket number to be called by the hostess, etc.

What the hey: five’ll getcha ten that nasty ol’ floor was overdue for some serious scrub-uppery anyhoo, even before the self-made oaf Bolton conjured the unique notion that it’d be a swell idea to attempt conjugal relations with a plate-glass window, capping off the unforgettable extravaganza by being rendered into tender, juicy Long Pig Kibbles & Bits (just add liquid, it make its own gravy!™) on the floor—flaccid, freshly julienned micropenis out, a-dangle, and in ready view.

Come ON, man! Stop pussyfooting around and just DO it already. Your public breathlessly awaits; don’t leave ‘em twisting in the wind like this, get right on down to brass tacks and git ‘er DONE, big fella! Beats those wan, deadly dull talking-head turns as a Faux News “expert guest-analyst” all hollow, and you know it every bit as well as everybody else does.

In any event, I gotta say that I do find it simply too, too adorable that Bloviatin’ Blowhard Bolton—a pluperfect dick with ears if ever there was one; the sine qua non, the ne plus ultra, the cum-laude instantiation of this grotesque de-evolutionary sub-strain—still somehow dares to dream that anybody gives a moist fart for anything he might say, on any topic whatsoever. It’s pathetic when you think on it, to be frank. One could almost pity the poor, deluded lower-bowel obstruction.

Almost.

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“Sustainable”

ain’t.

Thyssenkrupp to cut 11,000 jobs at steel division in major corporate shakeup
DUESSELDORF, Nov 25 (Reuters) – Thyssenkrupp’s (TKAG.DE), opens new tab steel business plans to cut some 40% of its workforce over the coming years, it announced on Monday in the latest painful overhaul of a German industrial giant, with workers promising fierce resistance.

Germany’s largest steelmaker, a division of Thyssenkrupp AG, is under pressure from cheaper Asian competitors, high power prices and a weakening global economy, leading to operating losses in four of the past five years.

Not to be making light of German suffering or anything, but one can’t help but wonder if the following might have anything to do with those high power prices I put in bold above.

The German government knew shutting down nuclear plants during the Ukraine war energy crisis was a bad idea but did it anyway, and the Green party minister may have been been deceived by his own people to make sure the closures went ahead, a magazine that sued the government to get internal documents released claims.

Germany ordered the closure of its final three nuclear power plants in 2022, the culmination of a years-long process to transition towards ‘renewables’, which ironically left the nation scrabbling for hydrocarbons like brown coal, gas, and LNG. This confirms long-held “suspicions” of government lies, the conservative opposition says.

Bold mine again, and dispositive, it would seem. But nah, must be a coinkydink or something, I suppose.

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Bee Doxxed by SPLC scum

Leftard filth, just doing what Leftard filth…does.

This week, the Southern Poverty Law Center published the identities of anonymous staff writers for our sister site, Not the Bee, which covers news so absurd that it seems like satire.

We at The Babylon Bee and Not the Bee remain committed to mocking woke insanity, but this is serious. 

The SPLC is a “scandal-ridden, discredited smear factory,” as our CEO Seth Dillon puts it, but government agencies, corporations, and violent leftists still take it seriously.

  • Last year, the FBI used SPLC data to connect traditional Catholics with extremism.
  • In 2020, Amazon relied on the SPLC’s “hate group” designations to disqualify conservative nonprofits from access to customer donations.
  • In 2012, the SPLC’s listing the Family Research Council as a “hate group” inspired a mass shooting plot at their headquarters.

We’ve been deplatformed, demonetized, and now doxxed by the SPLC. We won’t be intimidated, but we need your help to stay on the frontlines of the culture war. The only reason we’ve been able to survive these kinds of attacks is because we’re mostly reader-funded. And that’s where you come in.

Yes, as you’re bound to’ve grokked by now, the above is from a fundraising email the good folks at the Bee kited me; donation/subscription page is here, for any of y’all CF reprobates, scoundrels, and scalawags who might have a spare shekel or two to throw their way.

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Yes, it’s always been this way

Conflict and strife with Pisslam is a forever kind of thing.

Remembering Why the U.S. Navy Was Formed: To Combat Islamic Terror
During a recent mosque sermon at the North Hudson Islamic Center in New Jersey, a CAIR official, Ayman Aishat, made a seemingly startling claim:

We live in America, the United States of America. Brothers and sisters, those who do not know history, not too long ago, the USA was paying the jizya to the Ottoman Caliph.

Could this be?

First, let us define jizya. In brief (full discussion here), it is the monetary tribute that conquered or cowed infidels pay their Islamic overlords in exchange for peace, according to Koran 9:29:

Fight those among the People of the Book [Christians and Jews] who do not believe in Allah, nor the Last Day, nor forbid what Allah and his Messenger have forbidden, nor embrace the religion of truth [Islam], until they pay the jizya with willing submission and feel themselves subdued.

And yes, Aishat is correct: once upon a time, in its fledgling youth, the United States succumbed to paying jizya to appease Muslim terrorists. That story is instructive — not least as it includes the genesis of the U.S. Navy.

Between the sixteenth and eighteenth centuries, the Muslims of North Africa (“Barbary”) thrived on enslaving Europeans. According to the conservative estimate of American professor Robert Davis, “between 1530 and 1780 there were almost certainly a million and quite possibly as many as a million and a quarter white, European Christians enslaved by the Muslims of the Barbary Coast.” (With countless European women selling for the price of an onion, little wonder by the late 1700s, European observers noted how “the inhabitants of Algiers have a rather white complexion.”)

As Barbary slaving was a seafaring venture, nearly no part of Europe was untouched. From 1627 to 1633, Lundy, an island off the west coast of Britain, was actually occupied by the pirates, whence they pillaged England at will. In 1627 they raided Denmark and even far-off Iceland, hauling a total of some 800 slaves.

Such raids were accompanied by the trademark hate. One English captive writing around 1614 noted that the Muslim pirates “abhor the ringing of the [church] bells being contrary to their Prophet’s command,” and so destroyed them whenever they could. In 1631, nearly the entire fishing village of Baltimore in Ireland was raided, and “237 persons, men, women, and children, even those in the cradle” were seized.

By the late eighteenth century, Barbary’s strength relative to Europe had plummeted, and the Muslims could no longer raid the European coastline for slaves — certainly not on the scale of previous centuries — so its full energy was spent on raiding non-Muslim merchant vessels. European powers responded by buying peace through tribute, which the Muslims accepted as jizya.

Fresh and fair meat appeared on the horizon once the newly born United States broke free of Great Britain and was therefore no longer protected by the latter’s jizya payments. In 1785, Muslim pirates from Algiers captured two American vessels, the Maria and Dauphin. They enslaved and paraded the sailors through the streets to jeers and whistles. Considering the horrific ways Christian slaves were treated in Barbary — sadistically tortured, pressured to convert, and sodomized, as described in the writings of missionaries, redeemers, and others (e.g., John Foxe, Fr. Dan, Fr. Jerome Maurand, Robert Playfair; see pp. 279-283) — when the Dauphin’s Captain O’Brian later wrote to Thomas Jefferson that “our sufferings are beyond our expression or your conception,” he was not exaggerating.

And the rest, as the saying goes, is history. Note Washington’s pithy take:

In such an enlightened, in such a liberal age, how is it possible that the great maritime powers of Europe should submit to pay an annual tribute to the little piratical States of Barbary? Would to Heaven we had a navy able to reform those enemies to mankind, or crush them into nonexistence.

As we all ought to know well enough after ~250 years of continual Muzzrat depredation against the US, the only rational, realistic choice has to be Option B. Remember, too, the “…shores of Tripoli” bit in the very first line of the Marine Corps Hymn. It’s in there for a very good reason, y’know.

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No more business as usual, or else

Endorsed, a million bazillion kajillion percent.

As the scope of the FEMA scandal, wherein supervisory personnel made it written FEMA policy to discriminate against disaster victims based on political affiliation, has spread to being a long-standing and widespread agency practice, it’s time to remind people that such acts are not simply party fouls, but criminal acts under federal law, and that everyone who participated, or knew about but did not intervene to stop the practice, nor report a felonious official policy, up and down the entire FEMA chain of command, should be investigated, arrested, charged, and prosecuted under the above two sections of federal law, and imprisoned for appropriate terms in federal prison, both pour encourger les autres, and because they’re fucking federal criminals who need to spend fifteen years apiece in federal pound-you-in-the-ass prison, just to drive the point home. If that includes a FEMA director or cabinet-level secretary or three, all the better. Make Justice Great Again.

To hell with looking the other way, letting it slide, two-tiered justice, and weaponized government.

Round those bastards up, perp-walk them to jail, lock those motherfuckers up, and prosecute to the fullest extent of federal law, then bathe in the gallons of tears of progtards who will suddenly understand the second part of Fuck Around, and Find Out!

THIS—this right here, right down the fucking line. Elsewhere, Aesop hits another nail dead on the head.

Gabbard and Gaetz are excellent picks by Trump, but if Gaetz hasn’t indicted most of his predecessors and their underlings by next Valentine’s Day, he’s a waste of skin and oxygen.

Yeppers, that’s about the size of it. Since taking office Gaetz has talked the talk pretty well, for which I’ve cited him approvingly here more than just once or twice. But it’ll soon be time to walk the walk; if it turns out he ain’t up to it, as a surprising number of us seem to think, then fuck him for a game of checkers.

However much popcorn you have, it ain’t enough

Shitlib meltdowns: we’ve all seen ‘em, we all love ‘em, we’ve all laughed ourselves silly over ‘em, we all look forward to plenty more of ‘em in the days (years, hopefully) to come. Now Newsbusters collects the cream of the crud…SO FAR. One which I think is a particularly outstanding example of the genre:

“This is about a huge portion of our population who rejected the current system and what we have to solve for is why. We are the most prosperous and powerful nation in the world. This country is winning. I want to know why so many people in this country are feeling like we’re losing. Whether it is the economy, immigration, or for lack of a better term, ‘wokism’, we have now let misinformation become the accepted information. It has washed over us. Elon Musk, he buys Twitter and then he uses it almost exclusively to be a propaganda machine and we’ve accepted it. We’ve accepted a narrative that despite an actually great economic recovery, the vibes don’t feel good. So we want to reject it and get something else. And the person we are now betting on to change all of it is Donald Trump, a man who did two almost impossible things. He won the American presidency twice and he drove a casino into the ground. What will the future hold now that America has just decided we’re going to F around and find out?”

— Host Stephanie Ruhle on MSNBC’s The 11th Hour, November 6.

As is typical for these shrieking hysterics, not a single word of the above (beyond the first line) is actually, y’know, true. Yes, including “and” and “the.”

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CF Glossary

ProPol: Professional Politician

Vichy GOPe: Putative "Republicans" who talk a great game but never can seem to find a hill they consider worth dying on; Quislings, Petains, Benedicts, backstabbers, fake phony frauds

Fake Phony Fraud(s), S'faccim: two excellent descriptors coined by the late great WABC host Bob Grant which are interchangeable, both meaning as they do pretty much the same thing

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