Are you fed up yet?

You will be made to care. Unfortunately for Leftwits, that may not work out for them quite the way they assume it will.

I believe more and more people are starting to feel the way I do.

I never cared if you were “gay” or whatever acronym you chose to call yourself, until you started wanting special privileges.

I never cared what color your skin was, until you started blaming me for your problems.

I never cared about your political affiliation, until you started to condemn me for mine.

I never cared where you were from in this great Republic, until you began condemning people based on where they were born and the history that makes them who they are.

I have never cared if you were well off or poor, because I’ve been both, until you started calling me names for working hard to make a better life for myself.

I’ve never cared if your beliefs are different than mine, until you said my beliefs are wrong.

I’ve never cared if you didn’t like guns, until you tried to take my guns away.

Now, I care!

I’ve given all the tolerance I have to give. This is no longer my problem, it’s your problem. You can still fix it, it’s not too late, but it needs to be soon.

I’m a very patient person. But I’m running out of patience. There are literally Tens of Millions of people just like me that are sick of all the Anti-American crap!

I’ve always cared about life, and all lives, but now you try to force the notion on me and other fellow citizens and patriots that certain lives matter more than others. You protest, riot, attack, burn, and loot. Your so-called “movement” has become a radical out-of-control bunch of thugs, criminals, and anarchists who are intent on destroying our Country.

The masses have had enough! America is the greatest country on Earth, and if you don’t like America then we invite you to leave. We are done caring about your misguided “feelings.”

You don’t have the right to enjoy American freedoms if you are trying to take that right away from me or other Americans.

Damned skippy, right down the fucking line. An awestruck tip o’ the CF chapeau to MisHum and Legally Sufficient for this absolutely perfect blast of truly righteous rage.

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The Tucker Carlson Thing: the bigger picture

Rather than append this to my earlier Carlson post as an update, Jeff Goldstein’s typically astute analysis fairly well screams to be broken out into a post of its own.

Tucker up, Buttercup!
With Carlson out at Fox, and Matt Walsh pulled from YouTube, is the Uniparty making its move?

Love him or not — agree with him or not — Tucker Carlson’s voice is strong, unique, and bracing. Unlike, say, Sean Hannity, whose narrative brush strokes are driven by instructions on the paint-by-numbers canvas provided by his GOP and corporate handlers, Tucker was one of the few on-air talents on FOX you could see at times wrestling against the network’s hidden restraints, which we’ve all long known were there, and which we’ve all long known were being used to keep certain stories out of the news cycle and to foster certain narratives that the Uniparty favors or even promotes.

To me, it was obvious at the time of his release of January 6 footage — and the sudden and inexplicable stoppage of that release during subsequent shows — that bosses at Fox had applied the clamps to the January 6 story, and that Tucker had unfortunately buckled. Since then, though, his edge has only sharpened. He has, it seems, come to understand just exactly how important his voice has become to the New Right — which shouldn’t be confused with the “alt right.” The New Right has adopted more populist positions than the establishment GOP, certainly; and yes, they fight more effectively than Conservative Inc., because they’re willing to get dirt underneath their fingernails without fretting about their recent manicures. But more than that, Carlson’s connection to the New Right is in his nascent understanding of the ideology that is driving both the left and, by proxy, those in the Uniparty who are happy to go along with it.

Carlson, that is, understands that what we are witnessing isn’t politics and culture within the Enlightenment paradigm upon which the country was built, founded, and — through its law — framed. Instead, it is a toxic brew of applied postmodern Theory, cultural Marxism, and a move to globalize a re-worked iteration of communism under the twin values of “sustainability” and “inclusivity.” This is what Klaus Schwab means when he calls for a “move from a Production and Consumption to a Sharing and Caring economy metaphor”. To achieve this move, Schwab and his coterie of Supervillains have made it clear that they will insinuate these new values into our children, who — having been raised to insist upon such values inorganically yet obsessively — will become the vanguard for the Great Reset, the clay out of which Schwab and the transhumanist elite who run him will mold the new New Man. As I’ve long argued, what we are witnessing is Maoism marketed to the Western aesthetic. It is the real existential threat to this country — not “climate change,” not global overcrowding — and with it, to Western civil society, individualism, individual liberty, and all the other “discourses” of power Theory seeks to “problematize,” up to and including rationality, reason, Science, and the material world as anything useful outside the discourses that describe and maintain it. I find it no coincidence that calls from the government to rid the national dialogue of Carlson, or Matt Walsh, have led to predictable responses from media organizations or tech giants. They’ve been given the illiberal excuse to censor what they cannot abide. The truth is an obstacle to their remaking of the world. The Uniparty is a collaborator in the Great Reset — and the mainstream press is the voice of the Uniparty.

Oh, you’re definitely gonna want to read all of this one, folks. Although somewhat dark, there’s also a certain optimism to be found here as well—particularly in the quoted bits from Tucker concerning the unexpectedly liberating quality of simply speaking the truth in the face of the overwhelming tsunami of self-evident lies we’re inundated with by the godawful Amerika v2.0 regime. Jeff’s takeaway from all this? Merely this:

As I wrote elsewhere, “‘Queer theory’ is ‘critical race theory’ is ‘critical consciousness’ is the Marxist rejection of the individual as individual. Cultural Marxism is determined to raze norms, sow chaos, tear families asunder, and reduce being to collective conformity. I reject its premises as fully as I reject its adherents. I will not comply.”

It seems Tucker Carlson won’t comply, either. That Fox News has signaled it will comply — and indeed in many instances has already been complying — means that, in the mainstream of extant major news outlets, there are none left to stand athwart the new new thing, the poisonous thing, the silly thing, yelling stop.

The institution has been fully taken.

What we do next is up to us.

Exactly, precisely so—second verse, same as the first, just as it always has been, whether we can admit that to ourselves or not. Well done, Jeff old friend, and bravo.

Ducks in a row update! Divemedic sees the sinister hand behind all this, just as surely as Goldstein does.

There is an election coming. Time to silence anyone who opposes the left. We all know who is behind this.

Tucker Carlson has been kicked off of Fox.

In somewhat related news, I got several emails this morning from blogger. A dozen of my posts were deleted from my old blog over there. The reason given? They violated an unstated community standard. I haven’t posted over there in two years. It doesn’t matter. Every one of my posts on Blogger moved to this server when the blog moved, because I knew this was coming.

Gee, how very odd, eh? Must be a coincidence, thought nobody, EVER.

Soft landing update! Larry Correia perceives Tucker’s silver lining.

I am seeing a lot of people not really understanding today’s events in cable news. Ha ha. Tucker Carlson is such a loser. Big dummy got fired! 

That shows a very boomer era understanding of media consumption and overestimation of the power of a traditional news channel. 

He didn’t need Fox. The last I saw his contract there was something like cheap, which is chump change to a guy with a reliable audience in the millions every night. 

Tucker Carlson is now going to go sign a Joe Rogan size contract on a streaming service. He will make the most money of any news broadcaster in history and probably do so by an insane margin.

If you strike him down, he shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine—as I suspect asstard Rupert Murdoch and his shitlib get will soon be finding out, to their great dismay and my own boundless amusement. Be advised: the above-quoted material is gleaned from a Fakebook post, so click at your own risk. Not that I’m advising anyone not to, mind; hell, Larry’s pithy, concise bitchslapping of hapless empty-suit Don LeMon, which I omitted, is worth the price of admission all by itself. Via Insty, who also provides a couple of highly enjoyable Twatter posts as a bonus.

Wheels within wheels within wheels update! Bill has a notion:

In between the communist victory dances are chin pulling “analyses” appearing in most major leftist/progressive outlets, all purporting to explain why Carlson was axed, and by whom. None of them seem to agree much with each other. Conservative outlets have been notably silent. FOX itself had some anodyne scribblings, and Murdoch’s two biggest dead tree properties also have little to say, although the Wall Street Journal does hint at some connection between Carlson’s firing and FOX’s recent (last week) $750M settlement of the Dominion defamation lawsuit against the net. OTOH, The NY Post, the fourth largest paper in America, has nothing at all on the matter that I can find.

Let me offer a notion, one that doesn’t even rise to theory status, let alone conspiracy theory levels, but if I were trying to clear the decks of all possible serious opposition to the defeat of Donald Trump next year, Carlson (along with Elon Musk) would be my two primary targets, simply because of their ability to single-handedly move the larger rightwing culture beyond the hardcore Trump cultists, with none of the bombastic, juvenile baggage that Trump himself brings to the arena. Nor do I believe that the top stalwarts of the GOPe – people like Murdoch, Koch, and other giant moneybags, want to see Trump even running, let alone being reelected.

If this hunch is accurate, rate it as one down, and one to go.

No argument can I conjure against that idear, ain’t gonna try. Bear in mind, though, that the real reason behind Fox’s suicidal own-goal could very well turn out to be—quite probably is, in fact—All Of The Above. Plus a few others that we’re never gonna hear Peep One about, also.

Making them live their “truth”

Anything goes.


As do I. I mean, really, what could possibly be more fair? T’was toxic feminism created this voracious, all-consuming beast; now, let them live with it—cheek by jowl, in the house they themselves built for the rest of us, until they’re sick unto death of being forced to keep close-quarters company with the stinking, grotesque thing.

 GP also has a copy of Shepherd’s application to compete as a wyrmynnzzz, wherein zhirm hilariously declares “I identify as a woman for this contest.” Naturally, the weightlifting Powers That Be are pissing all over themselves trying to find a way to short-circuit the jolt of high-voltage reality being hurled their way by the Zeus-like Ms Shepherd.

According to the Reduxx report, the Global Powerlifting Committee of New Zealand (GPCNZ) appears to be scrambling to keep Shepherd out of the competition — even going so far as to change their rule book to say that he is ineligible.

The report points out that in their 2023 Rulebook, the Global Powerlifting Committee of New Zealand (GPCNZ) recognizes self-declared gender identity. In a section of the guidelines titled “Transgender Athletes,” GPCNZ states that “gender is presented on a spectrum” and that the organization “respects the autonomy of the individual and how they identify.”

“An archived version of the official website dated March 30 does not display the GPCNZ rules for trans-identifying competitors, instead leaning heavily on self-identification,” the report explains. “But, after submitting his application and declaring himself a ‘woman’ for the purposes of the competition, Shepherd was hastily sent an email and told he was not allowed to self-identify as transgender and must have been on estrogen for at least one year to compete.”

Shepherd is challenging their decision to exclude him.

You go, girl ummm, boy ummm, Manwoman ummm, whatever.

(((JOOOO JOOOO JOOOOO!!!)))

The Jew confession.

Maybe It’s Time To Fess Up, We Jews DO Run The World
As an American Jew whose family immigrated to the United States from Russia and Ukraine, the anti-Semitic words by people like Kanye initially horrified me. Still, I now realize that the time to be horrified is over. It is high time to fess up and tell the world the truth:

We Jews do run the world. And we’ve been running things for a very long time, manipulating world events for our own needs. It’s time to reveal the truth that many famous people now and throughout history were actually Jewish — part of the plot to perpetuate the myth and keep us in charge.

Martin Luther – yep, a Jew! But that one was pretty obvious. After all, he is famous for quitting his church to form a new one. Ever talk to a Jew about where he prays? He will tell you about the Synagogue he goes to and the one he would rather die than set foot in.

George Washington? Jewish, of course. James Monroe and Abe Lincoln also (take a look at their noses), So was John Adams (a short obnoxious guy whose real name was Ruby).

Napoleon was a Jew — no wonder he wanted to reconvene the historic Jewish court, the Sanhedrin. The French Emperor had this nervous habit of always playing with the Star of David hanging on a chain around his neck. The guy would look ridiculous, always sticking his hand in his shirt to play with the Star.

Most people don’t realize this but the Pope and all the Catholic Cardinals…members of the Tribe! You ever notice what they wear on their heads? Red Yarmulkes!

You know that famous picture of Bigfoot walking through the forest? I hate to disappoint people but it was a Jew in a costume. He was on the way to the international convention of the Worldwide Jewish Conspiracy (WWJC) and put on an Ape costume so people wouldn’t know about the convention.

See, I knew it, dammit, I KNEW it all along!

Note ye well though, folks, that I’ve been kicking around the ol’ blogosphere long enough now to remember back when The Lid blog was called “Yid With Lid.” So, y’know, you just can’t trust anything those Heebs say. Including the above jewa culpa.

All joking around aside, CF Lifers know by now that I have little to no patience with all that “the international Jew conspiracy is the cause of all our problems” schtuff out there. For one thing, it smacks too much to me of the selfsame thing the nig-nogs are constantly whining at Whitey about to ever ring true to these ears. For another, at least some of those Jew-under-every-bed folks insist that we’d be far better off to dump the treacherous, scheming, greedy Israelis and align ourselves with our True Allies™ over in the ME Sandbox—Iran, Saudi Arabia, et al.

Really, I ain’t kidding, I’ve seen ’em do it myself. To which I can only say…

Ummm, yeah, no.

As I’ve so often screamed at this impenetrable brick wall, it ain’t Jews you gotta worry about
—it’s liberals, be they Jewish, Episcopalian, Catholic, or what the hell ever else. We got plenty enough to be going on with dealing with the real menace to be frittering away any time or effort on made-up ones, that’s what I believe. But YMMV, I suppose.

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Do you Kipple?

Our friend KT—she of the much-beloved AoSHQ Saturday Pet and Gardening threads, among other fine and notable things—posts an excellent deep-dive analysis into one of the great Bard’s very best pomes.

Rudyard Kipling first published The Gods of the Copybook Headings in 1919, soon after the War To End All Wars. And it has been a decade since Bill Whittle slightly revised Kipling’s poem “for modern ears”, replacing “The Gods of the Copybook Headings” in the poem with The Gods of Wisdom and Virtue. He also replaced “The Gods of the Market Place” with The Gods of the Here and the Now.

The word choice of “The Gods of the Here and the Now” seems to me to be especially relevant to our culture and politics at the present moment. Some gods, especially the human ones, seem to fall out of favor in just a news cycle or two. Sometimes the descriptions of the non-human gods will be transformed in a news cycle or two.

So, what and who are the Gods of the Here and the Now, at this moment?

Safe to say that answering that question will automagickally provide the answers to a whole lot of other ones into the bargain. Read all of it. Then, from there, browse through my “Kipling” section, linked in Ye Olde CF Menuebarre up top yonder. There’s bound to be something in there that will be new to you, I’d bet. If you’re not a Kipling fan yet, then it’s high time you became one.

Gee, some wisdom, it turns out, truly IS eternal. Whodathunkit?

Modern-day Tea Party

A look at the historical roots of The Butt Light Rebellion.

Here in 21st century America, where we were once asked to tolerate alternative lifestyles, we are now required to celebrate them. Refusal to do so can result in an individual being effectively cancelled from participation in society. We are forced to bow in obedience to the woke monarchy. Well, Americans have had enough. And they are figuratively throwing Bud Light overboard as a statement of defiance to the woke ruling class.

Don’t forget, the original tea party extended beyond Boston Harbor. British ships carrying tea were also blocked at other US ports including Philadelphia and New York. The tea rebellion against Great Britain spread across the colonies, moving them closer to independence, just like the Bud Light Tea Party is a nationwide event in the battle to free us from woke tyranny.

In response to this beer boycott, America’s ruling class has been snarking that this all shows just how bigoted conservatives are, as if this is simply about Anheuser Busch hiring a cross-dressing man to become the face of their beer. No, it’s so much more than that.

It’s partly that people are fed up with the denigration of women – as if being a woman is nothing more than wearing lipstick, a dress and a handbag. But it’s more than that.

It’s also partly the fact that our ruling class despises the average American, as evidenced by the fact that the Bud Light marketing VP who hired Mulvaney was quite open about her contempt for Bud Light’s loyal customer base. But it’s more than that too.

As Dana Loesch notes, the rebellion against Bud Light is also about the erasure of women with such ugly terms as “menstruating people” and “chest feeders.” The rebellion against Bud Light is about the invasion of women’s private spaces by biological men.

To make another historical analogy, the massive backlash against Bud Light is akin to the Texian army at San Jacinto. After a long, humiliating retreat its soldiers suddenly found themselves in position to go on offense, screaming “Remember the Alamo! Remember Goliad!” as they took revenge against Santa Anna’s army.

Now the battle cry might be “Remember Loudoun County! Remember Riley Gaines!”

In Amerika v2.0, the list of “a long train of abuses and usurpations…to reduce them under Absolute Despotism” is far too long to remember all of it, much less boil them down into a handful of pithy motivational slogans. But with the above two, Buck’s made a good start on it, at least. The important part, really, is that battle at last be well and truly joined, not what Our Side chooses to yell at The Enemy whilst running at his lines, sabers waved aloft, with blood in our eyes.

Metaphorically speaking, of course.

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Memezapoppin’!

Spencer justly lauds Twatter über-mememeister Carpe Donktum for some truly outstanding work.

Twitter Memester Carpe Donktum Mocks the Trans Cult, and It’s Riotous
Carpe Donktum calls himself an “Eternally Sarcastic Memesmith,” and his eternally sarcastic memes have earned him over 335,000 followers on Twitter, as well as the undying wrath of the authoritarian Left: his pro-Trump memes were so effective that he was banned from Twitter in June 2020, at the height of Trump’s reelection campaign, and only reinstated when Elon Musk took over. Over the last few days, he has begun calling attention to the transgender cult’s grooming of the youngest children in schools in a particularly piquant — and riotous — way.

It all started on Thursday, when Carpe Donktum tweeted: “As a 3rd grade teacher, I often talk about Jesus with my students, they are so excited to hear about my faith. They point to the cross on [the] wall and ask me about the resurrection. Some have gotten baptized in the sink, as long as they don’t tell their parents. It’s our secret.” This tweet now has 3.7 million views. It was an obvious send-up of primary school teachers who push transgenderism on their students and keep it all secret from their parents, and just in case anyone didn’t get it, Donktum drove the point home in a series of follow-up tweets.

“I hope this doesn’t get me fired, please don’t share this to [sic] libs,” he added, and then: “want you guys to understand something, I am NOT grooming these young apostles, THEY COME TO ME and I follow their questions back to it’s [sic] source These kids feel something is not right inside them and I help them to understand that Jesus is what they are missing in their life.”

Warming to his topic, Carpe kept going: “These kids are so excited about their new spiritual identity that they devote every moment to studying the Bible. But sometimes, they lack the focus, in those cases the school nurse prescribes distraction blockers to help complete the transformation. Don’t tell mom and dad tho.” He took the opportunity to push other Leftist buttons as well: “One of my fondest memories from last year was when Taleb made his transformation from Islam to Christ. To celebrate his new identity we had a pizza party with his new favorite topping, Canadian bacon. Sometimes, I buy him a hotdog at lunch, since he can’t have them at home.”

Heh. Good, tasty schtuff indeed, more of which is perusable at the link. CD’s ingenious turning of the Trannylib tables has inspired me to throw in another similarly-inclined slice of brilliance, from Matt Margolis:

MargolisTransMeme

Heh again. That one’s culled from Matt’s Meme-manic Monday Substack post, the rest of which can be viewed—and really, really should be—at the immediately-preceding link. I’d suggest y’all subscribe to the Margolis thang like I already done dood a while back, so’s you can regularly enjoy more good stuff from the comfort and safety of your own email inbox as and when. But if you haven’t signed up for The Eyrie yet, then don’t you dare, you rotten bastige.

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Treatment for an epidemic of evil

Kunstler offers a prescription.

Call the Exorcist
You might be among those who have noticed that the people in authority in our country appear increasingly insane. It ought to be self-evident that this is deeply disturbing, but I will explain anyway to allay any residual mystification. In a sane human society, authority is granted to those who are trustworthy. People earn trust by demonstrating their allegiance to reality. Things generally work better when the people running them maintain cordial relations with reality. Now, you understand why so many things don’t work in the USA.

What more subtle minds are asking these days is this: when does this insanity tip over into evil? Especially the insanity evinced in our authority figures. How about when someone positively denies reality in the act of doing harm. How about Rochelle Walensky, Director of the CDC. Ms. Walensky is, to this moment, still proffering mRNA Covid-19 “vaccines” for children despite the reality that reams of evidence exist showing these products to be harmful, even deadly — and, in particular, by the previously exacting standards of the CDC’s sister agency, the FDA, which hold that just a few demonstrated injuries will lead to a drug being withdrawn from medical practice. (Ms. Walensky is a medical doctor, by the way.)

The political Left these days is determined to promote sexual confusion as a crucial component of the common good. Politicians, agency officials, corporate executives, the chiefs of NGOs and public interest organizations all support public demonstrations of ignoble and sinister sexual acts, often involving the inversion of sexual roles between male and female.

If you object to this behavior, you may be subject to extreme punishment (loss of career) for “transphobia.” The Left is taunting America with exhibitions like this (notice the child in the background at center). Is it not clear that this is some sort of insult to decency? The Left wants the non-Left to respond with acts of violence so that the Left can proceed to disarm the non-Left and prevent any opposition to the Left’s more serious plans to abolish personal liberty, such as a Central Bank Digital Currency that can monitor all your spending, punish you for your economic choices, and confiscate your earnings. The Left does these things in the name, they say, of “our democracy.” It’s a lie, of course. Democracy is the last thing they really care about. They do it in the name of pushing everybody around because all they really care about is coercion and punishment (applied with maximum sadism).

Human religious lore has it that the figure of Satan is the Father of Lies. Satan is the personification of evil. The political Left and the vehicle it rides on, the Democratic Party, with phantom president “Joe Biden” in the driver’s seat, has become the Party of Satan. We are in the presence of evil. (Call them psychopaths, if you’re more comfortable with that.) Whether you are religious or not, the Left represents a force at war with reality, and it happens to be at war against the rest of us. You can’t negotiate with it. It lies always and everywhere about everything. It must be vanquished.

Annnnd bingo. By “vanquished,” we should mean precisely that: no quarter, no mercy asked or offered—and most emphatically, no flinching from use of any means required of us to put the Great Enemy down. No, it doesn’t mean he won’t sooner or later arise again to resume his war on all that’s good and decent; almost certainly, he will. But neither does that unpleasant reality in any way absolve us from doing our duty, from living up to our solemn obligation to act in our own defense.

In such an epochal struggle as this, lethargy, complacency, and denial are just as potentially lethal an enemy as the Satanic Left itself is. No, we don’t have to like it. But neither do we have to just blandly accept living with it; in fact, if we are to survive, we mustn’t. In The Fellowship Of The Ring, Tolkien said it best:

“I wish it need not have happened in my time,” said Frodo.

“So do I,” said Gandalf, “and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”

And there you have it, ‘nuff said.

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Headless body in topless bar

The backstory of “the most anatomically evocative headline in the history of American journalism.“

This month marks the 40th anniversary of a watershed moment in journalism: the publication of the “Headless Body in Topless Bar” headline on the front page of the New York Post.

Headlines sell newspapers — at least, they sell the print newspapers offered via those relics known as newsstands. In 1983, almost all of the 965,000 daily newspapers that rolled out of the Post’s building in Lower Manhattan were sold on newsstands.

No one on the Post’s news desk debated the news value of the story: A Brooklyn man named Charles Dingle shot Queens bar owner Herbert Cummings to death and held patrons hostage. When Dingle learned that one was a mortician, he ordered her to behead the victim. Dingle, a box containing the head next to him, was arrested in an unlicensed cab in Manhattan. (Dingle died in prison in 2012, according to New York state records.)

The New York Times also covered the story, stuffing it on Page 2 of the Metropolitan section under the headline, “Owner of a Bar Shot to Death; Suspect Is Held.”

There would have been no Post headline without the gory story. Reporter Jim Norman wrote in a 2012 recollection that the police teletype in the newsroom had two items — one about the discovery in Manhattan of a cardboard box containing a head and the other about the discovery in a Queens bar of a mutilated torso. Norman said he helped to connect the dots as the “headless body” angle riveted the newsroom.

The headline went viral, by 20th-century standards. (then-NYPost managing editor Vincent) Musetto was on David Letterman’s show. It also was the title of a black comedy in the mid-1990s.

In this digital age, when search engine optimization rewards literal headlines and punishes wordplay, “Headless Body in Topless Bar” could perform well online. Was it too over the top? When veteran editor Steve Dunleavy heard criticism at the time, he supposedly replied, “What should we have said? Decapitated cerebellum in tavern of ill repute?”

Musetto always said his favorite headline was “Granny Executed in Her Pink Pajamas” over the 1984 story about the execution of Margie Velma Barfield, who killed her husband in North Carolina. (Musetto seemed to get all the good stories. My own favorite from my year at the Post was “Art thieves take the Monet and run.”)

Heh. Good stuff, that is, from a lost era before the qualities of wry, frisky humor; convention-straining wordplay; hard-boiled iconoclasm; and an above-all-else dedication to Getting The Story encoded in the DNA of crusty, old-school reporters with the de rigeur pint of whiskey tucked away in the bottom desk drawer had all been exorcised in favor of today’s fear-mongering; obeisance to Big Government and the urgenturgentURGENT!!! blandishments of “experts”; and lickspittle fealty to the PC/Woke/Hard Left agenda entire—a noxious hell-brew that poisoned bona-fide American journalism as it had previously been known fatally, and for all time.

Back in the 90s when I was living in NYC, the Post was the only daily I cared much about purchasing and perusing. NY Newsday plainly and simply sucked, on those occasions when it wasn’t infuriating; then again, it was an offshoot of Long Island-centric Newsday, and what sophisticated, urbane Manhattanite such as moi cared a whit about what those yokels might get themselves up to way out there in the boonies, anyway?

The WSJ was meh, boring, and still is. The Old Grey Whore (a/k/a the NYT) had nearly completed her long, slow slide into total hyperpartisan irrelevance and rank dishonesty; the NY Daily News was middle-of-the-road bland, making it a small cut above the rest of the shitlib propaganda broadsheets.

Later, 2002 would see a short-lived stab at reviving the old NY Sun, but despite the sly, self-deprecating insider-witticism of being printed on piss-yellow paper early on (because yellow journalism, get it?), the Sun failed to distinguish itself otherwise and thus quickly died the death, at least in its print version. Maybe it was good, who knows; although I was still spending a lot of my time in NYC, I still can’t remember ever even reading the thing, honestly.

As for the rest of NYC’s then-crowded field of news outlets: weekly radical-Left alternarag The Village Voice…well, most of the people I hung out with bought it exclusively for the voluminous rock-show and apartment-for-rent listings; amusing if frequently scandalous, even pornographic, personal ads; and maybe Nat Hentoff, among the small handful of my punk-rocker pals who cared about topical affairs.

When it came along, Russ Smith’s NY Press felt like a welcome breath of fresh air to NYC’s minuscule minority of RightWingNaziDeathBeasts like me, but it was short on the aforementioned Voice features New Yorkers had come to rely on. Even though I bought a copy every week the minute it appeared at the bodega down the street and read it cover to cover, I never for a minute thought it could ever amount to serious, credible competition for the Voice. And that’s pretty much how it went, eventually.

Maybe the best thing about this noteworthy anniversary of an unforgettable tabloid headline is that The Power hasn’t gotten around to outlawing any remembrance or remark upon such lighthearted, entertaining mass-media insouciance yet. You can bet they’re probably working on it, though.

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Trannysaurus Rex

Modern “science”—is there ANYTHING it can’t ruin completely?

Apparently not.

T-Rex to Modern Science: Don’t Give Me Any Lip
Breaking news from the Mesozoic Era is a phrase you might not have expected to hear. Nevertheless, recent research suggests the Tyrannosaurus Rex, that terrifyingly toothsome star of the movie “Jurassic Park,” might have had lips.

A study recently published in the well-regarded journal Science proposes as much. Respectfully—for I wouldn’t want to sound lippy around the experts, who I assume aren’t writing with tongue in cheek—I have questions.

First, how can we be so sure? No leviathan lipstick case was unearthed in Uruguay. No oversized Oxford with a telltale red on its collar was found bedside in Bangladesh. No love letter sealed with a kiss was discovered in Denmark.

Such a note would be suspicious anyway, unless we’re also to believe the newly-lipped Tyrannosaurus Rex’s arms were not too short for writing. Were they only metaphorically stubby-armed? Did disinclination to pick up a check contribute to their demise? Paleontology keeps a conspicuous silence.

Much of the case for dinosaur lips turns on the surprisingly low enamel-wear found on the solitary tooth of one Daspletosaurus, a distant T. Rex relative. Modern-day crocodiles, which are lipless, have substantially more outer-tooth enamel-wear than this solitary prehistoric chopper found in the dirt. Ergo, T. Rexes must have had lips.

So it’s “case closed, smoke ‘em if you got ‘em”? According to my dentist, I have more advanced enamel-wear than most men my age. I hope in the distant future nobody digs up my worn-down chicklets and convinces my descendants I was lipless.

This conclusion is really a mouthful. Glad though I am to have skipped the “checking enamel-wear on crocodiles” booth on career day in high school, I wonder: what if this particular dinosaur simply practiced uncommonly good dental hygiene?

I suppose unearthing a Little Black Dress, color-matched clutch purse, and a pair of high-heel pumps all preserved in amber from a T Rex fossil-bone orchard as confirmation of this dino’s perfectly normal, sane, and admirable gender-bender tendencies is a little too much to hope for. But we all know the truth about this cross-dressing, sexually emancipated Thunder Lizard just the same.

1

Bud transitioning

The obvious next step.

Budweiser Replaces Clydesdales With Cows Dressed As Horses
ST. LOUIS, MO — In a natural continuation of its push for diversity and celebration of transgender lifestyles, Anheuser-Busch has announced the company will be replacing the iconic Budweiser Clydesdales with cows that identify as and dress like horses.

“We feel this is a natural next step,” said Anheuser-Busch CEO Brandan Whitworth. “If we’re going to bend reality and ignore all basic understanding of science and biology with our Bud Light brand, then it only makes sense to make that philosophy consistent across our other brands, including the classic Budweiser advertising campaigns.”

The beverage giant scoured the nation in search of dairy cows that live their lives as horses. “I was very excited to receive a phone call from the Budweiser marketing folks,” said dairy farmer Ed Herman. “I just can’t get this group of cows to produce any milk because they insist on pretending to be horses. I was ready to put down the whole lot of ‘em, but now they can actually make me some money with this ad campaign.”

Budweiser marketing executives have mapped out an extensive campaign that will culminate in an emotionally stirring commercial during next year’s Super Bowl broadcast. “We really want to tug on everyone’s heartstrings,” said the company’s marketing spokesperson Katie MacDonell. “We’re absolutely certain that everyone in the country will be excited to follow the journey these proud horses embark on to discover their true inner species.”

After staring closely at the attached picture, I must admit I’m convinced.

Update! Transheuser-Busch tries to win back their traditional customer base, earning only mockery and derision for the patronizing, insultingly schmaltzy effort.

Anheuser-Busch has been devastated financially due to the company’s partnership with transgender influencer Dylan Mulvaney.

The company has lost over $7 billion in market value since they decided to shove Mulvaney in America’s face. Merchandisers have also revealed no one is buying Anheuser-Busch products.

Desperate to win back former customers, Budweiser decided to bring back the beloved Clydesdales in a new ad on Friday.

The ad opens with a Clydesdale galloping across a field of grain and then a town street. The horse next passes a fire department, a flag raising ceremony, and a beach.

The commercial concludes with the Clydesdale standing on its hind legs on top of a hill.

Couples and friends are seen throughout the ad along with national monuments such as the Lincoln Memorial.

Ad transcript:

Let me tell you a story about a beer rooted in the heart of America, found in a community where a handshake is a sure contract, brewed for those who found opportunity and challenge and hope in tomorrow, raised by generations willing to sit, share, risk, remember.

This is a story bigger than beer. This is the story of the American spirit.

If Budweiser thought former customers would forgive and forget, they were sorely mistaken. The former fans instead had an absolute field day over the commercial.

Follows, a collection of hilariously scornful Tweets from disgusted ex-Butt Light drinkers, my favorite of which would have to be this one:

Heh. Pinky Pie*, a “transgender”? Who the hell knew?

*NOTE: My ID of the above My Little Pony character might very possibly be in error; my daughter’s agonizing-but-inevitable phase of Pony-love was mercifully brief enough so that I hadn’t time to learn any but a very few of their names.

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1

“Reparations,” forsooth

The new Rosa Parks, just trying to “open a dialogue.”

Target security guard punches customer in the face after she demanded ‘reparations’

With that headline, the Post seems to be trying to make it look as if the security guard was out of line here. I assure you, he was no such thing; bitch got exactly what she had coming, that’s what.

A Target security guard punched a customer during a confrontation that was sparked when she asked for “reparations” while at a checkout line with more than $1,000 in groceries, according to a police report.

The ugly incident happened in October at the megastore in Blue Ash, Ohio, and began when Karen Ivery asked a cashier for their manager regarding the bill and reparations, according to the police report reviewed by The Post.

The cashier alleged to authorities that Ivery brought up reparations several times during their brief encounter before the manager arrived, the report states.

When speaking with the manager, the customer first asked for reparations and grew angry as she walked “aggressively” toward the manager, according to the report.

“Ivery kept berating her about reparations and her privileged life,” the report alleges as the patron kept walking toward the manager.

That’s when Zach Cotter, a loss prevention officer, intervened and asked Ivery to calm down and leave the store, the report states.

There’s a pic featuring the security guard’s lovely follow-through, and the FNIQ (Fat Nigger In Question) with her head snapped way the fuck back from the righteous smackeroo. It’s heartwarming, frankly. Onwards.

After reviewing footage of the incident, authorities wrote that they determined Ivery was the “aggressor” and she was placed under arrest.

“Ivery was confrontational with officers on the scene and didn’t want to explain her actions,” the report states.

In a bodycam video of the purported incident on YouTube, Ivery told an officer she wanted the cashier to contact the manager “so we could have a larger conversation about how money works, and how the provision works, and how it’s been working in our community in a very wrong way.”

“This is my Rosa Parks moment,” she added.

Because OF COURSE it is. So stunning, so brave, standing up to Da Man an’ demannin’ huh Rights n’sheet like dat!

I swear, if this incredible story doesn’t peg the needles on your Neegrow Fatigue meter, you probably ought to see a doctor or something.

5

Steve McQueen, problem-solver

Gotta admire a guy who appeals courteously at first—then, when he can get no satisfaction with good manners, civility, and politesse, is man enough to take the bull by the horns and resolve the issue a bit more…um, dynamically.

He Did Ask Nicely
After Steve McQueen established himself as a bankable movie star, he purchased a mansion in Malibu, California. His next-door neighbor was Keith Moon, the drummer of the famous English rock band, The Who. Moon lived the partying lifestyle of many rockstars, which annoyed McQueen, particularly because the drummer would always leave his bathroom light on. The light faced Steve’s bedroom window, which affected his sleep.

McQueen asked Moon more than numerous times to be mindful of turning off the bathroom light, and Moon continued to ignore his pleas. McQueen grabbed a shotgun one night, leaned out the window, and shot the light out.

I’d think that would do it, yeah. Heck, if I was Moon I’d be hesitant to go in that bathroom at all anymore after that, knowing I was putting myself in line of fire of a man eagle-eyed and steady-handed enough to ace a shot like that—in the dark, angry and stressed out, whilst hanging out a window. At the very least, I’d be content from then on to piss in a Solo cup in some other room, whether lit or endarkened, and toss it out the nearest window, rather than take a chance on replacing the bulb. With some folks, if you want to go on living it’s always sound policy not to make an enemy of them unnecessarily.

It may not seem obvious at first blush, but those were better days. With the current pussified crop of actors and rock and rollers, both aggrieved parties would no doubt put on their most fetching little black cocktail dresses, get together knee-to-knee over a nice chai latte, and have themselves a good, cleansing cry over the whole unnerving episode.

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1

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