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The Thin Blue Yellow Line

Smells strongly of asparagus cooking.

Uvalde Police Department Unveils New Thin Yellow Line Flag
To commemorate all the bodily fluids lost while assaulting parents trying to rescue their children from an active shooter, today the Uvalde Police Department announced its officers would now cover their uniforms, cars and front lawns with new Thin Yellow Line flags.

“Dozens of Uvalde police officers lost their underwear in the line of duty Tuesday, forever soiled in a hail of their own piss while cowering behind barricades as innocent children were slaughtered by a rampaging gunman just a few feet away,” said Uvalde police spokesperson Robert Ford. “Alas, the police department only had a paltry 40% of the entire town’s budget, and were therefore left powerless to protect their trousers, let alone elementary school children. Maybe if the town had been more serious about the security of the community, these officers would have been able to cower behind even bigger militarized SWAT vehicles for another 40 minutes to spare at least their innocent boxers and briefs.”

Texas Governor Greg Abbott held an emergency press conference to address the unspeakable loss of underpants at the Uvalde Police Department.

“The great State of Texas will never allow such a humiliating disaster to befall our brave men in blue and wet yellow ever again,” said Gov. Abbott, comforting an officer while dabbing a pee stain from his pants. “I’ve consulted with Senator Ted Cruz who has assured me that underpants with only one entrance are much more secure, so we will be forming a task force to look into this technology immediately. Shoot, I feel like I’m forgetting something,—oh, right, the school and the dead children. Uh, have my assistant send a gift basket with some of those nice thoughts and prayers you get at the Cracker Barrel.”

Lurking underneath this and several other news items coming out of Texas is the ugliest of ugly possibilities: that the influx of shitlib refugees from Califruitopia has finally tipped the political balance in the Lone Star Republic firmly Leftward.

The article’s last line, which I omitted as a feeble nod to any Fair Use-abuse concerns, is not to be missed. Putting aside our natural and perfectly reasonable disgust for the contemptible, cowardly pussies of the U(terine)PD, there is actually an upside to this, and our friend Aesop knows what it is.



5 thoughts on “The Thin Blue Yellow Line

  1. And then there’s this: Police have no legal duty to protect individuals. “The US Supreme Court has made it clear that law enforcement agencies are not required to provide protection to the citizens who are forced to pay the police for their “services.” In the cases DeShaney vs. Winnebago, 489 U.S. 189 (1989) and Town of Castle Rock vs. Gonzales [see https://www.law.cornell.edu/supremecourt/text/04-278%5D, the Supreme Court has ruled that police agencies are not obligated to provide protection of citizens. In other words, police are well within their rights to pick and choose when to intervene to protect the lives and property of others — even when a threat is apparent. In both of these court cases, clear and repeated threats were made against the safety of children — but government agencies chose to take no action.” https://mises.org/power-market/police-have-no-duty-protect-you-federal-court-affirms-yet-again. And this failure to act in a timely fashion – or at all – has been seen in this most recent shooting: “Cops waited outside while shooter killed students. Video and witness accounts from outside Uvalde’s Robb Elementary School suggest local police officers not only failed to try and stop the shooter for an unconscionably long time but also actively prevented parents from trying to save their kids. The shooter—Salvador Ramos—was inside the school for 40 minutes or more while police stood around outside, the Associated Press reports. “Frustrated onlookers urged police officers to charge into the Texas elementary school,” but the officers reportedly waited outside until a SWAT team was ready. How many lives could have been saved if the cops had acted sooner? If they had bravely put their lives on the line instead of letting elementary school children and teachers fend for themselves against an armed madman for nearly an hour?
    Instead, witnesses say the cops stood guard outside the school, preventing parents from rushing in to try and stop the shooter themselves: Javier Cazares, whose fourth grade daughter, Jacklyn Cazares, was killed in the attack, said he raced to the school when he heard about the shooting, arriving while police were still gathered outside the building. Upset that police were not moving in, he raised the idea of charging into the school with several other bystanders. “Let’s just rush in because the cops aren’t doing anything like they are supposed to,” he said. “More could have been done.” Video taken by Hugo Cervantes shows cops corralling parents outside the school, even pinning one man down.” https://reason.com/2022/05/26/witnesses-video-suggest-stunning-inaction-from-uvalde-cops-during-school-shooting/
    Frankly, that community would be a lot better off having no police at all – with citizens taking on the full responsibility for their safety and that of their families and community – a responsibility which they already have by very settled case law – and a responsibility which law enforcement does not have and has never had. And Russell Brand – and others, including the Biden Administration and numerous Republican and Democratic politicians, seek to deny the people the most effective means of carrying out that duty, leaving them defenseless in the face of lethal threats, against which their governments and police forces have no duty to defend them – and that’s simply unconscionable. https://streamfortyseven.substack.com/p/uvalde-ukraine-and-the-second-amendment

    1. Frankly, that community would be a lot better off having no police at all…

      Agreed, I’ve been saying this forever. The cops do a good job of protecting the criminals though, which is what their job really is.

    1. I’d bet there is at least a minor correlation between owning guns and stocking supplies…

      OTOH, I don’t think we run out of food, it’s just the price will be out of sight.

      Either way, stock up and save your life or save your money, or both.

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