From my cold, dead hands

Which terms, don’t let’s kid ourselves, will be perfectly acceptable to the rotten fascist bastards.

So the oligarchs had Biden mask up and meet our other rulers, via Zoom, to discuss our next big panic. Global cooling.

According to one report, “President Joe Biden’s ambitious plan to slash greenhouse emissions by 50 to 52 percent over the next decade could prompt sweeping changes that could affect how Americans eat, drive and heat their homes.”

Smash!

How Biden smash? Biden take charge! By taking away your meat and having you consume oligarch-owned corporate-produced high-margin food-like plant-and-chemical-based concoctions. Yes, the oligarchs will grow wealthier once you’re forced to give up the healthiest food there is, but you will do your part in ensuring global cooling doesn’t contribute to a tenth of a degree change in globally averaged temperature in the next century.

Specifically (same source):

Americans may have to cut their red meat consumption by a whopping 90 percent and cut their consumption of other animal based foods in half.

Gradually making those changes by 2030 could see diet-related greenhouse gas emissions reduced by 50 percent, according to a study by Michigan University’s Center for Sustainable Systems.

To do that, it would require Americans to only consume about four pounds of red meat per year, or 0.18 ounces per day.

It equates to consuming roughly one average sized burger per month.

What would all those corporate-owned burger joints do, complain? No, sir. They’ll make the switch to chemical cuts and serve up “impossible” and “beyond meat” “burgers”. And charge more for them, likely, to both increase their profits and convince you it’s your fear-based duty to pay more and “save the planet”.

My dears, the planet isn’t going anywhere and is no need of saving.

Doesn’t matter, of course. The Climate Change (formerly Global Warming, formerly Global Cooling, formerly “the weather”) hoax is a subterfuge, a flimsy mask covering their real agenda.

The University of Michigan, as you have seen, is given credit for some of these “studies.” The Beyond Meat company commissioned one such study from UM’s “Center for Sustainable Systems“. And Lo, this study found—or is discovered more appropriate?—Beyond Meat good, real meat bad.

…Let’s look at the “study”, commissioned by Beyond Meat in their quest to discover whether real meat was better or worse than the fake meat they were selling. What do you think they found—or discovered—in this study? This:

Based on a comparative assessment of the current Beyond Burger production system with the 2017 beef LCA by Thoma et al, the Beyond Burger generates 90% less greenhouse gas emissions, requires 46% less energy, has >99% less impact on water scarcity and 93% less impact on land use than a 1/4 pound of U.S. beef.

So important was this finding—or discovery—they used italics to announce it. That’s how you know it’s true.

Looks like money well spent for Beyond Meat! But don’t applaud yet, because there’s more!

The Center for Sustainable Systems kept at it, finding—or discovering—meat accounts for “56.6%” of “greenhouse gases contribution by food type in [an] average diet.” Not 56.5%. No way. It was much more serious. It was 56.6%. That level of numeric specificity is what makes it science.

The saddest part, I think, is what will predictably follow this opening round of battlespace prep. First, we’ll get the usual comment-section chest-thumpery at various Righty blogs, stoutly declaring that Biden’s Deep State wardens “WOULDN’T DARE” do this, or “cannot” do it, because Muh Constitution! and miscellaneous other wishful thinking. Then comes the defiant op-ed nattering about how WE’RE REALLY GONNA GET THOSE DEMOCRATS, by electing more Republicans in the elections of 2022, 2024, 2026, 2028, &c &c. Yep, those damned Commies are really gonna rue the day after we take back Congress again! Next up: a steaming, stinking pantload of the they’re scared of us! because we have all the guns! variety of blah de blah de blahblahblah.

The result of all this self-deceptive pud-pounding? In only a few short years, “Independence Day” cookouts across this benighted disgrace of a nation (assuming official government permission) will see all those obstreperous self-proclaimed guardians of liberty happily chomping away on delicious, Gaia-preserving “burgers” made in a corporate chem lab from crushed cockroaches, lawnmower leftovers, toenail clippings, and Soylent Green, in the most grand and glorious celebration of Our Precious ‘Murkin Freedom™ ever. The disgusting things would probably taste somewhat better if they were grilled over some good ol’ traditional Kingsford briquettes. Which unfortunately won’t be available, having been banned well before as the deadly menace they so truly are.

Just you wait, my friends. Just you wait.

10 thoughts on “From my cold, dead hands

  1. “The University of Michigan…”

    A fake “university”, clearly.

    They left out the part about how the new MU approved, stamped, and certified food would be better for you than food from the producer of cow farts.

    This kind of stuff is just battlespace prep, to get you to bend over and take something they have planned, in the hopes you’ll go along because it’s not as bad as this.

    1. Incremental Steps Left. They’ve been doing it 100+ years now.

      That’s what got us here. They’ll get us THERE one small step at a time. In ten years you’ll be wondering how we got so far Lefter over THERE…

  2. I’m glad you threw in the part about how ‘they’re scared of us because guns.’ Unless the fucking things get used, they don’t scare anyone. Even a 70 IQ negro in the ghetto knows that.

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