Cadaver Joe staggered out to mumble and slur his way through a speech of some kind or other, apparently. No longer giving the slightest toss about anything shat from any FederalGovCo sphincter myself, I wasted not a moment of my time or attention on it. Hearing it discussed on the car radio today, though, parts of it seem to have been of some moment after all.

On Thursday night, a masked Biden tottered down a long, empty hall to a podium. He then gave the most bizarre presidential address in American history. After a grim recital of “facts” about the last year, Biden emphasized multiple times that Americans had better take the vaccine — and be grateful to him for his amazing ability to get the vaccine to Americans. He also insisted that, vaccines or not, the government’s in control and can lock all of us up all over again.

Here, in no particular order, are the points that struck me:

1. Biden was more alert than he’s been in many months. Given how frail and confused Biden’s been lately, well, let’s just say his verve was suspicious. Even his eyes, which are usually tightly squinted as he struggles to stay alert and read his teleprompter, were wide open, almost scarily so. Still, he got visibly tired near the end, slurring his words and seeming lost.

3. Biden kept saying he was going to tell the truth. He quoted a woman he allegedly met who told him her heart’s desire: “‘I just want the truth. The truth. Just tell me the truth.'”

“Tell the truth,” Biden said again.

“My fellow Americans,” he said, “you’re owed nothing less than the truth.”

Later, he added, “I will tell you the truth.”

And then he said, “In the coming weeks and months, I’ll be traveling along with the first lady” and a whole host of others “to tell you the truth.”

Do you know who says things like that? Someone who’s lying.

Well, D’UH. Naturally, the speech was as packed stem to stern with outrageous lies as any other Demonrat exhalation reliably is. As pluperfect an old grifter as we know the pRetend pResident to be from his half-century spent rooting in the DC hog-trough, how could any sentient being expect something other than misdirection, hypocrisy, and calculated, self-serving falsehood from the senile old kiddie-diddler? Even so, there were some telling tidbits inadvertently revealed. More delicate, Pollyanna-ish types still locked in denial about what kind of country they live in might need to fortify themselves with a swallow or three of something strong.

7. The main thrust of the speech was that everyone must get the vaccine (the wonderful Biden vaccine). However, Biden conceded that even with the vaccine, masks and social distancing must continue. Even with everyone vaccinated, by July 4, maybe we can gather with small groups outdoors. In other words, even as we’re all pumped full of a vaccine, nothing will change. But we should trust Biden and remember that we’re all in this together.

8. Here’s the scariest thing Biden said, although he slipped it in so quickly many may not have noticed (emphasis mine): “Fourth, in the coming weeks, we will issue further guidance on what you can and cannot do once fully vaccinated to lessen the confusion, to keep people safe, and encourage more people to get vaccinated.”

The vaccine, rather than freeing us, will bring us even more tightly under government control as the federal government mandates what we can and cannot do.

It’s just beautiful, innit? Now you all be good little boys and girls and get your “vaccination,” then maybe Mommy and Daddy will think about letting you celebrate your “freedom” on “Independence Day” just a little this year, mmmmkay?

Naturally, Praetorian Media “journalists” wet themselves with delirious joy over Biden’s grim unveiling of how our Deep State masters really perceive the current state of play in Amerika v2.0.

“Biden Tells Nation There Is Hope After a Devastating Year.”

“Hopeful Biden Says, ‘I Need You.’”

“Biden Sets Vaccine Goal That Would Allow Americans To Gather By July 4.”

These headlines, from the covers of the printed New York Times, LA Times, and Boston Globe, greeted Americans Friday morning, 51 days into the Biden presidency and a full year into the beginnings of America’s long lockdown experiment.

“Seven Takeaways From Biden’s Prime-Time Address” topped CNN’s site. Chris Cillizza’s first two “takeaways”? “Donald Trump dug the hole” was number one. Number two? “A return to empathy.” Chris Cillizza, it’s worth noting, is a 45-year-old man and does not work for the White House.

“Last night is why Joe Biden won the presidency,” Politico Playbook opened with a straight face.

If you hadn’t watched the president’s prime-time address, you might think it was something — anything — other than the most depressing, defeated, and resigned speech since President Jimmy Carter held the office. You might think he hadn’t devoted his third sentence to a baseless attack on his predecessor, and the entire rest of his address to death, sadness, loneliness, and despair. You might think he hadn’t literally threatened the American people, warning, “We may have to reinstate restrictions to get back on track, please, we don’t want to do that again.”

Yeah, and you might also have trouble feeding yourself, tying your shoelaces, or finding your own ass with both hands and a compass, too.

But even in so deep and dark a night as this, there are glimmers of light to be seen here and there. For instance, earlier today I was on the phone with a friend of mine as he drove along McConnells Highway in South Cackalacky. Mid-conversation, he began mumbling a slow count-off, getting up to eleven before bursting into raucous laughter. See, along a certain stretch near his place there are a lot of homes flying the now-desecrated Stars and Stripes out front. Turns out that my friend was totting up the number of folks he passed who had suddenly decided to fly their US flag upside down. This, mind, on the day after Bai-Ding puked forth the most profoundly un-American speech by a *president* in our history.

Which is actually, literally illegal unless done as a distress signal in circumstances of extreme danger to life or property, if I remember right. I figure those people needn’t worry overmuch about being arrested or jailed, though. Our current national predicament makes a pretty good argument against it.