GIVE TIL IT HURTS

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Q: Is EVERY liberal a liar?

A: Yes. Yes, they are. In fact, as I’ve long maintained, if it wasn’t for lies, they wouldn’t have anything whatsoever to say.

Which, you gotta admit, would be a most welcome change of pace.

Shocking never-before-seen documents from an ongoing trial concerning allegedly stolen Eagles lyrics shine new light on an infamous night in 1980 when Don Henley was arrested after a teen overdosed at his home.

Henley has always maintained that the overdose happened during a going-away party packed with crew members as the band began a lengthy post-’70s hiatus. Henley was charged with giving cocaine to a minor, but said he took the rap to protect the others. He also has maintained that he never had sex with the teen.

“There were roadies and guys in my house – we were having a farewell to the Eagles,” Henley told GQ in 1991. “I got all of them out of the house; I took complete blame for everything. I was stupid; I could have flushed ev erything down the toilet. I didn’t want this girl dying in my house. I wanted to get her medical at tention. I did what I thought was best, and I paid the price.”

A contemporary letter written by Henley to a Santa Monica probation officer, now introduced into evidence in the unrelated current trial, tells a very different story.

Oh, that’s putting it mildly, I’ll tell ya that much for nothing. Read on for the rest of the sorry, sordid story. Then go ahead and smash all your Eagles records to bits, and make a big bonfire with the shards. If you have any Eagles rekkids, that is; never could stand that band, except perhaps for “Witchy Woman,” which I haven’t heard in years and can’t honestly say I’’ve missed. So how best to dispose of my Eagles collection is not really a problem for moi.

Via Ace, who is every bit as disgusted as you and/or I.

As I read this story, I wondered if this scumbag pedophile — and he is a pedophile; there is no mistaking a fourteen year old girl for an adult — wrote “Dirty Laundry” as his “I’m the real victim here” cri de coeur.

Apparently, he did just that. The song is the whine of a pedophile who’s angry that he got caught.

He’s a dick with ears, that’s what, and always was.

Update! Now Joe Walsh, on the other hand

Joe Walsh of The Eagles executed the greatest prank in the history of pranks.

The Eagles had just completed a concert in Oakland, California. ‘The Day on The Green’ was a yearly concert sponsored by promoter Bill Graham which was held at The Oakland-Alameda County Coliseum.

Following a night of boozing with the group, crew, and associates, Don Henley became unconscious and Joe Walsh tried to grant him a circumcision. The attempt was carried out badly, giving Henley scarred for the rest of his life and bending to the left.

“I don’t know what I was thinking” said Walsh, “I was out of my mind a lot back then. I had just finished super gluing all the furniture to the ceiling and I was feeling bored. It was about 4AM and it was just Me, Mick Jones of Foreigner and Steve Miller still awake. Henley was passed out naked on the floor. His junk looked like bazooka joe wearing a turtle neck so I figured I would help him out and remedy the situation. I got out my trusty old Swiss army knife and went to work on him. I got half way through and realized I had no idea what I was doing. The knife was old, dull and rusty. The knife got stuck and Steve Miller pulled the rest off with a pliers.”

The following morning Henley awakened squirming in discomfort with his crap swaddled in gauze and duct tape. “I had no idea what happened,” said Henley “then I heard Miller and Walsh giggling uncontrollably in the other room. I was rushed to the hospital and I am now scarred for life, but it was all good clean fun. I can pee around corners now. That Walsh is an interesting bunch of guys.”

Heh. Serves the old pedophile right.

Walsh, of course, has always been known for the many pranks he’s perpetrated on his bandmates and crew, including but not limited to the time he glued the heavy curtains shut in a hotel room shared by two of his road crew, endarkening the room so’s they’d sleep right through bus call the next morning, then calling them on the phone last minute and shrieking hysterically, demanding to know where the hell they were at and what the hell they thought they were doing, because dammit, this bus was fucking leaving!

Needless to say, the hapless roadies came scrambling downstairs to the lobby in utter panic—all disheveled and only semi-awake, trying to pull whatever clothes they could on as they raced out to the tour bus, swearing blood-curdling threats of vengeance while Walsh and the rest of the entourage collapsed in gales of raucous hilarity.

Always did like Walsh, going back to his days with the James Gang, although I must confess I wouldn’t much care to tour with the guy, in any capacity or role.

Man, dig them groovy threads!

2 thoughts on “Q: Is EVERY liberal a liar?

  1. “Man, dig them groovy threads!”

    LOL, I wouldn’t be caught dead, then or now, in such ugly shit 🙂
    It would probably be fair to say I loathe most of these ugly minded commie bastards. Only a handful actually gave a damn about your freedom…

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