U.S.—An American manufacturer has been overwhelmed with preorders for its brand new “ejection porch,” which is specially designed to detect when Biden’s vaccine evangelists are at your door so it can launch them into the stratosphere.
“Excuse me, sir, do you have a few minutes to talk about our lord and savior Dr. Fau– AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” said one door-to-door vaccine auditor after the advanced technology in the porch detected his whiny and annoying government vaccine-evangelist voice and launched him into the sky, above the clouds, and out of sight.
For anyone who can’t afford an advanced and costly porch upgrade, the company is selling handy signs to hang on your porch to tell them to get lost.
In a first for the Babylon Bee, that last line appears NOT to be satire:
NOT SATIRE: Keep Biden’s minions away from your house with this Vaccine Door Sign. Get your actual, very real, not satirical, Vaccine Door Sign. There is limited stock, click here to get yours now!
Here’s the sign:
i want one of those too. Although probably I’ll just make my own and print it at home. IMHO, some MUCH stronger wording is called for here.
I’m pretty sure anyone could rig say – a garden hose & sprinkler – to go off whenever required.
“Oops! Did you get soaking wet? Bad luck showing up just when my lawn sprinkler was set to go off.”
“Such a shame.”
“Oh, and by the way, you’ll are trespassing. Fuck off & run along now!”
If you want to talk about the Vaxx one of us has you in their crosshairs right now. Proceed at your Own Peril.