I resemble that remark

August 5th, 2013

James Delingpole ‘fesses up–for all of us:

I think it’s time you learned a bit more about me. Be warned, it isn’t pretty.

Basically, my sex life is a mess. I’ve never had a successful relationship with women, owing to the fact that I’m misogynistic, immature and a braying right-winger with a face like a horse. And we haven’t even got on to the size of my penis yet which, as you can well imagine, is minuscule.

Then there’s my unfortunate educational background. You’d think it would be an advantage having had an excellent private education at Malvern followed by a stint reading English at Oxford. But God, you couldn’t be more wrong. From public school all I learned is arrogance and a sense of entitlement and a lofty disdain for the poor while my English degree, being a mere “humanity”, is worthless and leaves me especially ill-qualified to comment on any issue which has to do with science.

And it’s not just that I’m ignorant about science, either. I’m actually anti-science. Perhaps it’s all the money I’m paid by Big Oil, perhaps it’s because I’m mentally ill, or perhaps it’s just because I’m plain evil but, would you believe it, I’m on a personal mission to disseminate ignorance by deliberately distorting the truth about issues like climate change because it doesn’t accord with my selfishness and greed and refusal to alter my rapacious lifestyle for the common good.

Did I mention my mental illness? I think I did but it really can’t be mentioned often enough. I’m sick, warped, perverted – not to mention stupid, childish, puerile, irresponsible, silly, flippant, sexist, racist, disables – and totally wrong in the head. It’s all down to the lack of love I received as a child, which turned me into a rampant attention seeker. The kind of upbringing I have scarcely bears thinking about but what we can say with confidence is this: the values imparted to me by my parents were so perverse that they created the veritable monster I am today.

Nah. Not really. The hideous creature I’ve just described isn’t me but an amalgam of the various things that get said about me pretty much every day, either in the troll comments below my blogs, or on Twitter or via email.

We all feel your pain, James. Now let’s get back to the hatin’, everybody! YAAHOOOO!

I tell you this stuff not in any way to make you feel sorry for me – being attacked for vices and problems you don’t actually have is more entertaining than it is wounding – but rather because of what it says about the left-liberal mindset.

Basically these people don’t get us. They don’t get us at all.

They really don’t get much of anything. It’s a necessary consequence of having your head rammed up your ass so far you have to yawn to see your way around, and being terrified of any idea you haven’t been spoonfed by people who have been masticating that tired old cud for generations.

By us, I mean, of course, those on my side of the political argument: Tea Partiers, classical liberals, libertarians, conservatives – anyone who believes in smaller government, less regulation, greater personal autonomy from the groping tentacles of the state.

And by “these people” I mean all those on the other side: the puritanical control freaks; the sustainability evangelists; the communitarians, commies, fascists, socialists and lefties generally – anyone who believes that the answer to our problems lies in bigger government, more bureaucracy, more state-enforced fairness, higher taxes, etc.

That’s about as good a breakdown of the two sides as you’re ever gonna get. And it oughta be enough right there to convince you that you’re going to enjoy the hell out of reading the rest of it.

(Via Bill)

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Comments appear entirely at the whim of the guy who pays the bills for this site, and may be deleted, edited, ridiculed, or otherwise pissed over as he in his capricious fancy sees fit. Thank you.
  1. Drumwaster
    August 5th, 2013 at 23:48 | #1
    It has long been a truism that while Republicans think Democrats are merely foolish, Dems think Republicans are EVIL. This is just more of the same...
  2. August 6th, 2013 at 05:22 | #2
    Some get us, some don't -- but the ones that do get us aren't particularly interested in our opinions. And they have a surprising (?) amount of success at persuading their confreres to pay us no mind.
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