While locked away in durance vile the last several months I resumed an old habit of mine, a most enjoyable one: listening to streaming OTR (Old Time Radio) shows. There are a handful of enthusiast sites out there who have somehow acquired catalogs of every episode of radio classics like The Great Gildersleeve, Fibber McGee and Molly, The Shadow, Jack Benny, and one of my own personal favorites, Gunsmoke. Honorable mention goes to the finely-crafted CBS Radio Mystery Theater, which ran on the CBS radio network from 1974 to 1982. RMT was a loving kiss blown back to OTR by people who clearly held a tremendous affection for the old programs of yore, a most worthy homage for a most deserving art form.

One of the best things about RMT is that whoever collected all those episodes (evidently, some fellow in Seattle whose name I don’t know) didn’t trim away the commercials and newscasts that went along with those old shows. The old Budweiser ads (one even features Engelbert Humperdink crooning the old “When you say Bud…” lines in the inimitable Humperdink style, bless him) are wonderful to hear again, but the real revelation is the news breaks.

The contrast between what mainstream journalism was then and the vampiric, dishonest obscenity that disgraces its older, better sibling today is truly striking. Even the voice tone, phrasing and delivery from 1974 is markedly different: calm, sober, non-sensationalistic, just an even-handed recitation of the day’s happenings without trying to promote a position or pimp an ideology.

I was a huge fan of RMT during its original run and lived in a house whose unquestioned lord and master, my dad, diligently had the Whole Fam Damily in front of the TV for the evening news each and every night, and I can’t say I remember the difference between then and now being so stark, so obvious. But there just ain’t no arguing with the tapes. It serves to highlight what a low point the squeaking, chipmunk-voiced propagandizing of our present-day news readers represents. The wreckage they’re responsible for creating at every level of our society speaks for itself, I think.

Greetings Y’all

Been talking with Mike, he sends regards and all the ‘usual froo-froo’ if’n you will. Think the man is a mite -peeved- at the whole “Winderz versus Apple” thing as, as I stated before, Fearless Leader apparently enjoys the “Dark Side” and usually does all his work on an Apple. The lappie I sent him was a Spawn-Created Winderz machine, which, after that one poast before this apparently yet another loooooong poast he’d been working on got TOTALLY ate the fuck up, so he’s been in a “Fuckitall” mode til he gets out and back on his Apple.

Which brings me to the next. Mike’s gettin’ sprung from ‘durance vile’ inside of oh shit, what about 5 days from now? He texted me at the beginning of the week (we haven’t talked much what with the torture sessions they’ve been legit putting on him) saying he had like 7 days left.

Not that I’m ignoring him nor y’all, I just been busy AF lately. Like everyone else, I’ma bit more’n nervous ’bout the whole Krainian thing, and I’ve been actually working on assisting Mike and his Brother with some defensive suggestions for the new compound…well not ‘new-new’ but now fully refurbished thanks to y’all’s donations (Thank Billy for getting the funds to Mike on the DL… good dude there… bit of a smartass, but a good dude). Mike’s brother has a “couple of acres and a mule” so to speak that the cash helped refurb to ‘cripple friendly’ and is going to be Mike’s “Hunker in the Bunker”

Hope he’s got room for me, Wifey and Sapper.

But otherwise, he’ll be back in a short-short. Like I said, he’s busy giving name, rank and serial number only to the torture specialists, and it’s only a matter of a few days til he gets sprung.

My apolly-olly-geez for being remiss in the updates… quite literally, shytte at MY A.O. has been off the chain stupid with Dumbunny to the point I… I had to call the fuzz in, which is a violation of Rule #1 “Never call the fuzz, deal with it yourself and have a shovel on hand”.

Problem is, Dumbunny is Wifey’s only Spawn, and I’m -not- allowed to ‘terminate with extreme prejudice.’

Yet.

So, stay tuned and we’ll see what happens

More Later I Remain The Intrepid Reporter
Big Country

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Greetings Me Droogs N Droogettes!

OK, so that latest and greatest is we got the monies rolling out to Mike in a short-short. Doing it ‘properly’ so that we avoid the earlier mentioned “Imperial Entanglements” sos to keep things on the cool side. Now, as to the update on Mike, he’s doing very well that I can tell. He’s busy as hell what with The Physical Abuse/Rebuild he’s got going on, but he has graduated from “bedridden” to “wheeling around” in his own wheelchair.

He also may be slacking a bit. I sent his ass a Dell Laptop that I know arrived ‘cos I was tracking that sucker, and Big Mike called me all excited. Now, part of the issue is probably a learning curve, primarily as I didn’t know this, but Mike, he’s been drawn over to the “Dark Side”, i.e. he’s an Apple man.

Maaaaan justt when you think you know someone huh?

And since he IS an Appleman, and I’m a Winders sorta guy, whelp the spare Lappie I had Spawn put together was a Winders 10 with an bogus-build on it, read non-licensed version. It works, it’ll just keep asking for the activation code and pissing him off. He’s probably having to learn the ins and outs of the Microsuck Universe.

So, I’ve been blowing up his phone telling him to GTF Back to work here, but then again, he just may be composing a bit of a Magnum Opus sort of poast like he’s been known to do. He’s been essentially cut off from the news and shenanigans that’ve been going on, and I’m sure just having the ability to surf again is like giving a Crackhead a baggie of Rock after a long absence.

Guess we’ll have to wait and see. Many thanks to Steve for the as-of-late poasts… I’m barely capable of keeping up with MY house these days, so my thanks brotherman!

More Later
BCE

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Greetings All Y’all who still give a shit!

OK literally got off the phone with Mike right now. He’s in GREAT shape mentally, wore the fuck out physically, and happy AF in general.

Now, Mea Culpa here. The laptop I put together for him suffered some ‘issues’… (Dell Inspiron L3350) and I had to replace a new memory stick in as one of them wasn’t working proper… Then, outside of the memory issue, Spawn had me replace the regular HDD. Per Spawn’s influence, and the fact that he’s a mad fan of Mike, I ordered, waited and then plugged a brand new 256 GB what do you call it, a Solid State Drive which may or may not survive the transportation to him… either way…

Now he’s got Win10…

And after the fact I find out his normal OS is Apple

Goddamnit

I -do not- want to spend the $$ on a fucking apple. No joke Aye? He’ll get the Win10 and deal with it, as he said in the humorous “get better or I’ll beat you” conversation I had tonight.

So, otherwise, shytte goes out NOW in the next 24.. and Mike should be back in charge.

Apple or No Apple Aye?

BCE

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Greetings Gang!

OK seems Mike is doing good and bad. Good in that he’s alive, bad is that he’s -still- not answering the phone, nor texting. His brother Jeff called today to give me the name of a trusted folk up around yonder to get the cashola that we raised to Mike and avoid any ‘imperial entanglements’ i.e. the Tax Doodz and Medicaid Arseholes.

Seems that the biggest problem is that Mike has to be completely financially busted ass broke to make sure that he get allllll this medical ‘stuff’ taken care of, so’s we got Billy up thar to be the bagman. Many thanks for that Bro! After talking to him n’Jeff, I guess it’s literally be a bag full of cash being parceled out…

Sort of reminds me of how I paid the internet bill back in Bagdad.

Literally $10k USD in a brown paper bag, handed to a dude named Mustapha in a back alley out of the regular line of sight from most folks… Made even MOR entertaining in that I was usually a rolling death machine, All body-armored up, armed with my MP-5, 3 or 4 frags, and my Browning Hi-Power…

Good times, good times.

So, anyways, they’re getting Mikey walking/stumping and kitting him out with a peg leg, and he’s being ornery as all get out. He’s bored to death, and still pretty demoralized, so his location is here:

Now I just checked in and when I mentioned Mike by name, the on-duty nurse started giggling and said “Oh Mike!!! Oh he’s a character!” so it’s pretty clear that he’s keeping everyone on their toes around him… I’m shipping out a laptop to him either tomorrow or the day after as they have wireless there and he’ll be forced to get back in Ye Olde Bloggsaddle ‘cos I know y’all are tired of my sorry ass, that and he’s bored to death what with only the TV to keep him entertained.

So, show him some love and make sure you put HIS name on any mail going there, and the staff’ll make sure he gets it.

Good news… ’bout damned time Aye?
More Later
BCE

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More Later but God Bless the Geeks who helped fix dis mess!

BCE

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…I didn’t fuck up getting us (well, the page) out of what Mike would be sure to call the “Horrordays Theme of 2021” and back to the Classis Cold Fury… Whew… Thankfully Mike has the majority of the stuff save TO the site… I’m sure I’ll still catch hell, but fuckit…

More Later Yadda Yadda

BCE

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Greetings Evvabody!

Again, it’s been a loooong couple of weeks for our Fearless Leader. He was doing good, then not so much, then good, then back to not so much… well, it would appear, leastways on it’s face that he’s finally getting around to where he’s being transferred tomorrow to start his full on PT and Rehab. The whole Omnicrom or whatevz caused a brief delay, as well as some more cuttin’ on Mike… sounds like he’s “Frankenmike” these days, stitched up like a rag doll… BUT

He called me tonight and we got to talk for a few before Nurse Ratched showed up to enforce the ‘no laughter’ rules.

He is, in his own words “…ready to put this shit behind me and relearn how to do -stuff- again!” I won’t go into details, but without going all graphic, I think his idea of heaven right now would be to use an actual toilet bowl as opposed to the bedpan brigade that he’s been stuck with. The whole ‘learning to walk ‘ thing is scheduled a bit down the road, but for now, and pardon the pun, one step at a time.

Now, other things is Wifey is going up thataways in the next week or two. She’s got to go visit a very old and dear friend who’s in similar circumstance… this ole girl though broke her leg and has nobody (fambly speaking) in the immeadiate A.O. to assist, so’s Wifey is dispatching up there to help out for a week or so. She’ll be passing by Mikey’s Torture Palace, and as I told him point blank:

“You’ve been on vay-kay long enuff. I’m sending you Wifey with a laptop for you to start getting back on here… the Cold Fury regulars are sick of me, and it’s getting ugly(er).”… and considering this crowd, that’s pretty damned ugly. He’s looking forward to it, and his mood is much better. For a while he was really down, but it looks like the light at the end of THIS particular tunnel ain’t a train.

Lastly, I thought I mentioned it but Mike opened for, played with, and knows Brian Setzer of “Stray Cats” fame, and he’s got a new album and tour going on, so I reached out… not for a donation per say, but to see if he could at least use some of that serious star power to help out Mike a bit. We shall see.

So it’s -finally- looking up. More as we go I’m the Intrepid Reporter

BCE

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Fingers crossed, but I got Brian Setzer’s Management info and contact info. Hopefully he responds.

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Greetings Evvabody!

The horror-days took up an inordinate amount of bullshytte as one can well imagine. Much to my professional chagrin, I’ve been behind on updating everyone on ye olde Fearless Leader of the Peg-Legged variety. According to sources, the infection in his spine didn’t get the full rinse and clean, and they had to cut on Mike again… I’ve been out of the loop, most embarrassed, but I still have to make the donuts Aye? He’s alive, and ready for rehab but still…

Still makes me feel like a shit tho…

The good news is that we’ve raised over $36K for Mike

The bad news is it’s only $36K.
Anyone got some Hollyweird contacts out there? FFS we should be able to hit up Brian Setzer… anyone who gets a line on that motherfucker and gets this ball of slow moving wax moving again, I’ll set up with an Autographed set of Charlie Mike Comix starring moi… and yeah, ego trip… y’all haters can suck it.

Yeah, NOT a shameless plug tho, it’s out of print. Not that it’s a OMFG thing, just nice to have some of my antics illustrated and published… I have two editions, #1 and that one #4 that I’m a featured story in. And yeah, that pic above is Marc’s rendition of me LOL… The main ramrod in it is Marc Baker who’s famous Army Wide for his “Private Murphy Comic” which was featured for years in Stars and Stripes. been friends with him for a minute, and he came up with a cathartic way for us Iraq Vets to tell our stories via a comic book… very cool…

So, whoever can get the moneyball rolling again, I’d surely appreciate it. Win 2x signed comix… I raised a hair over $1k with my raffle $$$. And that’s now complete (drawn today). Maybe another raffle in the future, ‘cept for some serious prizes, like a handgun or shotgun? Have to see… all comments and suggestions are welcome and yes, it’ll go to Mike, despite Mister “Royally Stupid” Commenter before…
I’ll let you know when I hear from either Mike or Jeff… it’s been slow though as I figure evvabody be in the post horror-daze mode…
More Later I Remain The Intrepid Reporter

Big Country

5

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Hey y’all!
Mike’s Brother Jeff called, and gave me the latest. Seems our Dear Leader is doing very well. He’s in surgery today, as they’re sewing up all the pieces parts that they didn’t before. For those of you who don’t know, when they get all hacky-hacky-wackity with the axes and scalpels, they have to plug in a drain to get all the nasty out, especially in light of how much infection he had riding shotgun on him.

Also, his carcass responded to the meds exceptionally well, and the infection they were worried about in his back is going away nicely. He’s being moved OUT of the ICU here too to Room 6219 in the next 24-48 when he recovers from this round of stich-bitch sewing.

All and all, most excellent news.

Jeff also pulled rank on him so to speak, and actually got him to choke down Ye Olde ‘Ospital Gruel that most of us who’ve been in a ‘ospital know of… I’d rather be on the Omelet and Ham MRE than hospital grub. BUT it’s utterly necessary to get him back up to speed and strength. Jeff -also- got him some resistance bands for him to start working out and he did, so fear not gang, Mike’s now on the mend. Jeff said it’s be about another 7-10 days, and they’ll be transferring him to a rehab facility where the real fun begins…

So, as I gets intel, I’ll keep throwing it up here. Also, I’m using some of the donated cash to send Mike -something- as Jeff said no flowers nor Big Tiddied Whammenz has shown up. If I thought I could get away with it, I’d have a Doordash deliver a Double Bacon Greaseburger and a cold beer, but the docs might have issues with that… I’ll let y’all know when that goes, and get Jeff to take a picture or something if Mike’ll allow it.

More Later I Remain The Intrepid Reporter
Big Country
Mini-Update:
And I did this as well, we’ll see what happens?

Greetings Me Droogs N Droogettes!

So a bit of a clarification is in order:
Some dood over at Gab burned me a new asshole over the poasting of my Raffle at my house.

Thing of it is, since the whole “Mike Thing” started, I A) Had a complete drop off the cliff on the Raffle, and B) I’ve wrapped up every. single. donation. that I’ve gotten for the Raffle since the “Mike Thing” started, and put it in Mike’s Kitty so to speak.. right now, about $500 from me in dribs and drabs.

The reason I poasted about it is also, the fundraiser has staggered and like had ZERO Movement.
I figured the incentivization of “Donate/Raffle” gets you cool shit. If anyone misunderstood, them me most ‘umble apologies.

And for that guy? Thanks for making me aware of that I didn’t communicate clearly enuff… but by the same token, stay in yer own fucking lane if’n you ain’t stepping up to the plate Aye?

Now, as far as Mike’s condition?
Mean as a snake still. He’s supposed to call me tonight. This time I’ma gonna be ‘good cop’ as what he’s been through is some seriously traumatic shytte and I’ve sorta-kinda dealt with stuff like this over the years. His biggest question is “Why me?” which is a natural reaction.

Now, ‘other biddness’
Chris Muir drew this up for other/all the webpages to Poast on their Bleggs as a free download to use in conjunction with any fundraising:

TBH, the face on that there hottie has a MOR than passing resemblance to Wifey, but I ain’t sayin shytte as her ego is already at “Hindenburg” levels.

So, that’s whats going on. Any Ideas for Blowing Up this campaign? I’m by no means a marketing specialist, and my mags have run dry. Any suggestions in the comments would be welcome!

More Later I Remain The Intrepid Reporter

Big Country

5

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Ok Gang, Me Droogs N Droogettes!

Mike a.k.a. “Stumpy” or “Peg-Leg” as he shall be known as is doing very well currently. He’s still got -some- infection but the croakers (doctors) are no longer worried. Only thing they had to do was on his right foot it seems that his Big Toe didn’t get the message and got eighty-sixed with the rest of the bad bunch.

His mood has not improved but they have brought his clothes, and his cell phone so he can get calls, for those of you close enough to be in the ‘inner cool-kid circle’

I’m broke but if’n someone, in lieu of a donation can send a titty-strip-o-gram it’d probably make things better.

Get the chickie to make Mike to literally eat his veggies and be a Good Boy
He’s been protesting the grub in the hospital ‘cos it ain’t Greaseburgers and Fries, with an extra side of cholesterol. I told him that right there is why we’re where we be at Aye? She’s also have to tell him to be nicer towards the staff, as they’re doing their level best to wrangle an angry redneck shy a leg and a toe. Then and only then should he get the titties.

I told him he should be grateful as fuck instead of ornery as Wifey’s friend? He had a similar experience, but unfortunately for him (God rest him, he was a nce guy) the Gangrene went allllll the way up and done ate his junk… like complete package elimination

>shudder<

So yeah, he needs to stop giving shit to everyone. Especially the nurses and Physical Tortur… errr Therapists.

Now, other things Big Country done fucked up:

Namely Mike’s PayPal, which I swear to God as my witness, I had no idea existed on this here place. The link is listed as “Shameless Begging” and is on the right hand side. It’s mike@coldfury.com for y’all too fucking lazy… Y’all who want to donate that way, go for it. As far as I know, the shit is good… if not, please let me know, ‘cos a lot of this ‘stuff’ I’m finding out via bits and pieces here n’there… Swear to Gawd if Mike survives, I’m ’bout to purely kill his ass done dead Aye.

So, good news all around, and if’n you get the urge to come over to MY place and throw $$$ for the raffle, I’ma ’bout to -sweeten the deal- with an additional 27 rounds of M855A1 62grain with an additional 3 rounds of XM856 64 grain tracer… and two brand new PMAGs in the wrapper to load ’em into. $10 a chance, with the Two Damascus handmade boot Knives and two autographed Charlie Mike Comix. Total now is 6 rounds of Tracer, and 54 rounds of Green tip ball, plus two mags and the ka-niffs and comix…

Oy Vey! Whadda deal I’m offering!

I’m announcing that at MY house tomorrow, so y’all Furians get a jump on the rest of MY criminal scum.

MY PayPal is theintrepidreporter2019@gmail.com LOL.
$10 an entry, to be drawn on New Year Eve by Wifey or some other suitable piece of fluff from her friends in bikinis.
So, More Later I Remain The Intrepid Reporter

Big Country

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Got the addy of where they go Mike stashed. I actually talked to him today and boy-howdy, he’s in an especially ornery mood, as well he should be. He’s also high as all get the hell out on the good stuff. Bad news is the infection is now on his spine… they’re working it, and it’s ‘minor’ for the sake of minor, but he’s still kicking, and as I told him only the good die young…

So He’s at

 CaroMont Regional Medical Center 2525 Court Dr, Gastonia, NC 28054

I know I’ve annoyed y’all enough but any love you can show him is much appreciated, as he said “I’m trapped here naked, eatin’ shitty food, and for some reason one of my legs is missing!!!”
The ‘good stuff’ indeed.

So yeah, no calls to him however. He’s got to rest and get better, so don’t be blowing up the fon there Aye?

Much Love to Everyone and Prayers for my Brother From Another Mother

I Remain The Intrepid Reporter
Big Country