{"id":4653,"date":"2021-09-12T23:50:55","date_gmt":"2021-09-13T03:50:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/coldfury.com\/?p=4653"},"modified":"2021-09-12T23:58:49","modified_gmt":"2021-09-13T03:58:49","slug":"short-but-true-and-funny","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/coldfury.com\/wp\/short-but-true-and-funny\/","title":{"rendered":"Short but True (and Funny)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Greetings Me Droogs N Droogettes!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Now, shit’s been too serious<\/strong> lately. I’m dropping this at my place in the A.M., but figured we got to lighten the mood up round here at Cold Fury, lest our Host Mighty Mike finally flips his shytte Aye? So vorwarts as Die Chermans would say:
Rolling down “memory lane” I came across’t\u00a0another<\/em>\u00a0picture set that was EPIC in it’s entirety.\u00a0 Now… this was Christmas 2006… We had a BIG Corporate Party under the Prime, ITT… what it -ackchully- stood for is lost on me and my shitty TBI induced memories, but we always called it “International Thugs n’ Thieves”.\u00a0 One of the larger more corrupt outfits to have ever run a Middle Eastern Grift… I was with Stanley under as a subcontractor.

So, being a miiiiiiiiiiiiiiillion miles away from the Untied Statz, the company tried to lay on a pretty BIG parh-tay, despite the ‘no booze rules’ of Kuwait.\u00a0 Now, don’t get me wrong, Booze\u00a0was<\/strong>\u00a0ostensibly available, however it was of two varieties, one being home-made moonshine called Siddique, pronounce Sid-deek-key or more often “That undrinkable bullshit that’ll leave you blind” and then\u00a0real<\/strong>\u00a0‘Murican Booze smuggled in by various factions… however, a single 5th of Jack?\u00a0 Yeah, try almost $200 USD.\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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#7 @ $200? Fuggedaboutit.

Waaaaaaay outta my league.  Not that I didn’t have the cash, but man, even for me, that’s faaaar too much dinero for a buzz.

So, anywho, the company threw a big assed party… booze free of course.  At the party, me and my bros went together, and the grub was good, and it was at a BIG mall in Fahaheel, which was a major high-end shopping District of Kuwait City.  At the party, they even had a gen-you-wine camel and drover of said-Joe-Camel there, for us to get rides and pictures taken.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Harris and Byron?  Well, they stood there and Joe camel seemed to be aight with it.
Then it was my turn.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Now, I wanted to get a -bit closer-… so shot #2 was needed:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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It’s blurry, but that’s because the camel started getting ‘ornery’ and Bryon who was taking the picture yelled to me at the last second “Big Country, watch out!”
Next thing I know, I got a camel chomping down on my right shoulder fucking vicelike and hard.<\/strong>
Bryon of course kept taking pics sorta-kinda<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Motherfucker done went and bit me…<\/strong>
And me? Well, I lost it…
The last pic is of Bryon going to pull me off the drover, cause I done went and did a Conan IRL.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Yeah,… no shit, it was sort of like this:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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