T-Rex to Modern Science: Don\u2019t Give Me Any Lip<\/a><\/strong>
Breaking news from the Mesozoic Era is a phrase you might not have expected to hear. Nevertheless, recent research suggests the Tyrannosaurus Rex, that terrifyingly toothsome star of the movie \u201cJurassic Park,\u201d might have had lips.<\/p>\nA study recently published in the well-regarded journal Science<\/em> proposes as much. Respectfully\u2014for I wouldn\u2019t want to sound lippy around the experts, who I assume aren\u2019t writing with tongue in cheek\u2014I have questions.<\/p>\nFirst, how can we be so sure? No leviathan lipstick case was unearthed in Uruguay. No oversized Oxford with a telltale red on its collar was found bedside in Bangladesh. No love letter sealed with a kiss was discovered in Denmark.<\/p>\n
Such a note would be suspicious anyway, unless we\u2019re also to believe the newly-lipped Tyrannosaurus Rex\u2019s arms were not too short for writing. Were they only metaphorically stubby-armed? Did disinclination to pick up a check contribute to their demise? Paleontology keeps a conspicuous silence.<\/p>\n
Much of the case for dinosaur lips turns on the surprisingly low enamel-wear found on the solitary tooth of one Daspletosaurus, a distant T. Rex relative. Modern-day crocodiles, which are lipless, have substantially more outer-tooth enamel-wear than this solitary prehistoric chopper found in the dirt. Ergo, T. Rexes must have had lips.<\/p>\n
So it\u2019s \u201ccase closed, smoke \u2018em if you got \u2018em\u201d? According to my dentist, I have more advanced enamel-wear than most men my age. I hope in the distant future nobody digs up my worn-down chicklets and convinces my descendants I was lipless.<\/p>\n
This conclusion is really a mouthful. Glad though I am to have skipped the \u201cchecking enamel-wear on crocodiles\u201d booth on career day in high school, I wonder: what if this particular dinosaur simply practiced uncommonly good dental hygiene?<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n
I suppose unearthing a Little Black Dress, color-matched clutch purse, and a pair of high-heel pumps all preserved in amber from a T Rex fossil-bone orchard as confirmation of this dino\u2019s perfectly normal, sane, and admirable gender-bender tendencies is a little too much to hope for. But we all know the truth about this cross-dressing, sexually emancipated Thunder Lizard just the same.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Modern \u201cscience\u201d\u2014is there ANYTHING it can\u2019t ruin completely? Apparently not. T-Rex to Modern Science: Don\u2019t Give Me Any LipBreaking news from the Mesozoic Era is a phrase you might not have expected to hear. Nevertheless, recent research suggests the Tyrannosaurus Rex, that terrifyingly toothsome star…<\/p>\n
Would you like to know more? Trannysaurus Rex<\/span><\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6,12,16,20,28,50,61,161],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-11087","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-alternative-history","category-balls","category-believe-it-or-else","category-brilliant","category-gay-porn-cock","category-youwillbemadetocare","category-hmmm","category-sciency-stuff","wpcat-6-id","wpcat-12-id","wpcat-16-id","wpcat-20-id","wpcat-28-id","wpcat-50-id","wpcat-61-id","wpcat-161-id"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/coldfury.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11087","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/coldfury.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/coldfury.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coldfury.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coldfury.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=11087"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/coldfury.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11087\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11091,"href":"https:\/\/coldfury.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11087\/revisions\/11091"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/coldfury.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=11087"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coldfury.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=11087"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coldfury.com\/wp\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=11087"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}