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Bitch slap

Posted on February 13, 2025February 13, 2025 by Mike

Lakeside Joe asks the obvious question, then answers it himself.

Why would a TacoBell need a security guard? Oh – it’s in downtown LA. Never mind…

Even absent much if anything in the way of explanation for the guard’s dealing of some righteous Street Justice—what, Offissa Friendly didn’t have a vial of pepper spray on his belt he coulda used to git dat crazy-ass ho under control instead?—I’m gonna just go ahead and summarily pronounce this Your Feel-Good Video Of The Week.

Reminds me of a hilarious episode years and years ago—what was it, late 70s, early 80s, maybe?—when three of us were riding with our old friend Wayne in his VW Rabbit and he spotted a cpl-three young, ghetto-thug Neegrows fiddling about under the raised hood of a broken-down strugglebuggy just up ahead. Wayne quickly cranked his window down, signalling to all of us in the car with him that he meant to vocally heckle the unfortunate Cullud Yoot as he passed. Leaning his head out of the window, it was obvious that Wayne was struggling to come up with something cutting, witty, and demoralizing enough to suit his nefarious purposes.

Finally, just as we pulled alongside the smoking, steaming, beat-up old Loser Cruiser, he settled for an uncertain “It’s…WHATCHYA GET!!!” At which, the rest of us in the VeeDub nearly gave ourselves hernias, we were laughing so hard at our friend’s abject failure to deliver the last-minute goods. We teased and taunted Wayne for his lame, somewhat puzzling ad lib for many years afterwards.

It was a very different time back then; these days, a carload of skylarking white teenagers cruising around the West Side of CLT wouldn’t dream of yelling insults and/or general invective at any Pyrsynzz Of Color, lest an Ingram Mac-10 suddenly appear in every dark-complected hand and commence to spraying the offending vehicle with a rapid-fire hail of 9mm projectiles. Well, until the PoS Mac-10s jammed, at any rate. Which those useless pieces of stamped-out junk will do, especially on full auto. Ask me how I know.

1 thought on “Bitch slap”

Aesop says:

February 14, 2025 at 2:50 am

Trespasser dealt with appropriately.
QED

Now she can pay attention and listen out of her good ear.

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