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Mission creep, creepy mission

Whatever would we DO without Too-Big Government helping us to evolve into better, more compassionate and/or tolerant human beenz?

EXCLUSIVE: Biden’s Intel Community Is Celebrating Pride Month With Free Trans Flag Manicures, ‘Filipinx’ Lectures
Intel agents can get their nails painted and listen to a non-binary ‘Filipinx’ activist discuss ‘trans rights’ — all during work hours

The top intelligence agency in the United States is celebrating Pride Month by inviting agents to have the transgender flag painted on their nails, participate in a “Pride Ally Challenge,” and learn from a “non-binary,” “Filipinx” activist who has taught children about her non-binary identity, a document exclusively obtained by The Daily Wire reveals.

The intelligence document outlines nine different Pride Month activities held by the Office of the Director of National Intelligence (ODNI), a cabinet-level agency overseeing the rest of the IC, including the CIA, FBI, NSA, and intelligence components in each branch of the military. Over the course of the month, intelligence officers will have their nails painted with trans flags, or even learn to crochet their very own Pride flags.

“For nail painting, we’ll have our pro team of FVEY artistes ready to decorate you ready for Pride Month, with the option of celebrating pride or trans flag colors,” the document reads before further encouraging intelligence agents to have their nails painted. “If you don’t normally paint your nails, or have never done so, all the better! We’ll do everything for you, and you might just love it. What better way to show your allyship to the community?”

I KNOOOW, right?!?

The elaborate array of Pride celebrations, all of which will occur during the work hours of America’s top intelligence apparatus, demonstrates one of the most blatant ways in which the most powerful instruments of the federal government have been captured and leveraged by leftwing ideologues.

Rep. Mike Waltz (R-FL), a member of the House Select Committee on Intelligence and combat-decorated U.S. Army veteran who fought in the elite Green Berets, confirmed the authenticity of the document with the intelligence community. He said it’s another example of the Biden administration wasting valuable time and resources away from serious intelligence-gathering activities that are vital to our national security.

“It just shows where this administration’s priorities continue to be, which is a virtue signal to the progressive Left, rather than staying focused on lethality, effective intelligence collection, and keeping America safe,” Waltz told The Daily Wire. “It’s just a total misplacement of priorities, and it comes from the top, and it comes from highly politicized political appointees, by political appointees that are pushing an agenda.”

The ODNI provided several more outlets for intelligence agents to celebrate Pride Month.

Oh, I don’t doubt it, not one bit I don’t. I mean, why wouldn’t they have, for Gaia’s sake? Whatever our other differences, I think one thing we can all agree on is that there simply is no better, more appropriate use of taxpayer dollars imaginable than funding Pride Month celebrations, boosting Allyship as much as possible, and painting all the cis-het male CIA and FBI agents’ fingernails in the vibrant colors of the Rainbow Flag against their will. Right?

It’s the whole reason we have a federal government in the first place, really. Pimping for mentally-unbalanced freaky-deaks and ramming the Trans Mafia agenda down Normie throats using their own filthy money is an essential, core component of the overall US intelligence-agency mission. I mean, it says so right there in the friggin’ Constitution, you guys! Can’t recall exactly where right at the moment, but I’m absolutely, positively SURE I saw it in there someplace once. Or somebody told me it was in there, maybe. Or, y’know, something like that. DUDE, it’s, like, Civics 101, or something. Why, anything less would be LITERAL GENOCIDE©!!!!

Update! Just had what I think is a totally fabulous idea: every Friday evening during the month of June, throw a huge ODNI Pridemania© disco bash at FBI Training HQ in Quantico, complete with DJ, bartenders, and wait-staff of indeterminate gender; splashy wall decorations; baffling modern-art installations; whirling, swirling, queasy-making lighting effects; and a seriously kickin’ sound system cranked up to Full Stun! As that yummy, gummy, pansexual Captain Kirk would say: BEAM ME UP, BITCH!!

Attendance will be mandatory, especially for all binary-H888R male IC personnel. Cute cocktail dresses and size 16 spike pumps obligatory for men, construction apparel (including but not restricted to steel-toed brogans, Oshkosh B’Gosh overalls, and hardhats) for the ladies (whatever THOSE obsolete words mean anymore. Men? Women? Whatevs!). Open bar serving pink, fruity tropical libations all nite long; free amyl-nitrate poppers, dildos, and Astra-Glide available at the bar on request. No highballs, Scotch, malt liquor, or cheap canned beer because…well, quite frankly, icky-POO, sweetcheeks!

So all you FBI, CIA, NSA, and DIA darlings, get ready to mix ’n’ mingle, shake yer booty, and get funk-ay like a monk-ay at ODNI Pridemania©—guaranteed to be the wildest, craziest, most slam-banginest weekly Happening of the entire year!

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2 thoughts on “Mission creep, creepy mission

  1. I’m all for these males having their nails painted with freak flag colors. It will serve as an identifier.

  2. Acceptance becomes mandatory advocacy becomes compulsory participation.

    At this rate, by the end of the decade, mandatory butt-fucking of all employees and applicants will be compulsory for hiring, promotion, and continued employment.

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