About damned time, too.
Experts at NASA have discovered a large object heading towards earth, made up completely of Joe Biden ballots. After calculating its mass, the scientists concluded that the meteorite contains approximately 19,000,000,000,000 galactic mail-in-ballots. An astronomical number, indeed.
When asked how they are so sure the ballots aren’t cast for the incumbent, a NASA employee said that there is no evidence that pro-Trump mail-in-ballots even exist in the universe. Team Biden has already promised to grant citizenship to all extraterrestrial aliens, even if they are bent on destroying humanity and devouring mankind.
It will take about 400 years for the meteorite to strike earth. Pending the unavoidable arrival, Fox News has already called this election, as well as all other elections for all eternity, in favor of Biden and any other Democratic candidates running for office throughout the Galaxy.
400 years? Well, no problem, actually. I mean, the debates made it apparent that they’ve gotten reanimating Cadaver Joe’s rotting corpse down to a science. Still, I do kinda hate having to wait that long for SMOD to finally show up.