It’s getting mighty hard to parody them, but Surber just made a damned fine job of it.
Writing newspaper editorials is an exercise in exasperating futility. They have scant impact. 243 newspapers endorsed Hillary. 20 endorsed Donald John Trump. Who won?
To those still laboring at a craft that last had impact in the 19th century, I draw upon my 27 years of experience to offer this generic editorial on whomever President Trump nominates for the Supreme Court.
You may cut and paste it, and your boss will not notice the difference.
The Senate Must Reject This Monster
President Trump — a vain, deranged, and impulsive man elected by Russia and not a majority of Americans — has nominated the worst judicial candidate sinceÂ Roger Brooke Taney, the chief justice who authored the Dred Scott decision. [Nominee’s name] may be worse. Not only does [he or she] view African-Americans as chattel, but women as second-class citizens!
Most Republicans want to return America to the oppressive and conformist days of the 1950s when everyone had a job instead of welfare!
President Trump has nominated a person who wants to return to the slave days of 1850s!
This would beÂ Armageddon for our Constitution. Women would be forced to seek reproduction freedom from back-alley butchers again. Republicans would bar minorities and millennials from voting. People would be allowed to own as many guns as they like without registering them;Â vaginas would be more regulated than assault weapons!
They’re so comically predictable by now it pretty much writes itself, in a way. And damned if I didn’t just realize that Surber isn’t in Ye Old Blogrolle, which I remedied with a quickness. I really need to give that thing a good going-over soon.
Dream a little dream update! Elsewhere Surber explores a topic I mentioned here not long ago myself, but in much greater detail than I did.
In addition to being an obscene poison pen writer, Kevin D. Williamson is sloppy. He penned an ode toÂ Harley-Davidson because it is standing up to “The Man” by shipping more production overseas to protest President Trump’s tariffs.
Williamson missed the real story. Harley-Davidson owes its existence to tariffs imposed by President Reagan in 1983. Ingratitude is hard to see when you are a Never Trumper basking in the glow of conservative victories that President Trump earned.
Harley now has plants all over the world. Harley, Williamson and the National Review ignored Reagan’s actions and words. They bet against America. They call it free trade, but given the low wages paid inÂ Thailand, where Harley is building a plant, maybe we should call it slave trade.
Williamson wrote, “unilateral free trade is an idea far too radical for our current timid national mood.”
Unilateral free trade is economic euthanasia.
“Free trade” is a chimera, a unicorn. As long as there are nation-states with governments pursuing competing interests, it will not exist—it cannot exist.