Precision, people. In language, as in all things.
Not hardly. Not first, nor last, nor anyplace betwixt. I doubt I could ever GET that sloppy drunk, honestly, even back in my heyday for such things. Not for lack of capacity or will, mind; the spirit(s) is willing, though the flesh be weak. It’s just that there ain’t that much liquor on the entire planet.
We went four years without glossy magazine covers trying to puff up the image of the sitting president. And no magazine ever featured our former first lady, an actual fashion model, either. The Bidens have now graced several, but this may be the most absurd. GQ Hype in the U.K. gave President Biden a fashion spread that is just….gag-worthy. The cover reads “Joe Biden, Swagger-in-Chief!” with a picture of the president LARPing Garth Brooks sitting on the tailgate of a vintage pick-up truck, complete with a few bottles of Budweiser at his side:
This magazine is trying to turn a septuagenarian from Delaware with cognitive issues into a heartthrob. Really? Swagger?
Stagger is a lot more like it. They were closer than you might think, actually; they only flubbed it by the one letter. In a sense, though, this embarrassing rumpswabbery is an entirely fitting thing. The fluffer-girls at GQ stitched up a phony image promoting one of the biggest phonies ever to occupy space actual humans might require for other, more useful purposes. They’re propping up a prop, creating a character for a man bereft of any. You don’t get more fitting than that.
Additionally, there’s GQ Hype itself to consider. I mean, could there possibly BE a magazine more appropriately named? C’MON, MAN!!!
Hope they put Dress-Up Joe into a Spiderman costume next. Or maybe do Gene Simmons, of KISS. I think that would be pretty cool.