Cold Fury

Harshing your mellow since 9/01

There’s always a workaround

Don’t have an Instagram account, and never wanted one. Until now.



Now that I have everyone’s attention, the backstory:

When Kimberly Matte captions an Instagram post “suns out, guns out, buns out,” she mostly means it. The sun may be out, but she’s inside. Her buns are definitely out, because she’s wearing a lime-green thong. Technically, there’s only one gun out, but it’s an AR-10 battle rifle, so she’s still overdelivering.

Matte has more than 84,000 followers on Instagram and recently founded her own social media marketing and modeling agency. She grew up in Windsor, Ontario, one of seven children — a fan of skateboarding, dirt-biking, four-wheeling, soccer, and tree forts, and not of guns. The first time she held a shotgun, she was a kid, “65 pounds soaking wet.” Her dad and brothers thought it would be funny to let her shoot it. “They didn’t tell me it was going to basically rip my shoulder off,” she says. “I was like, I’m never touching a gun again.”

But then three years ago, she moved to Michigan to be with her American husband, who’d recently retired from the military. Now they shoot guns together, and arrange assault-weapon-centric lingerie photo sessions for Matte and her clients. She makes good money for her part, doing sponsored posts for brands both firearm-related and not — assault rifles one day, teeth-whitening treatments the next. For $100 and some free products, Matte will post a “selfie and shoutout” on her Instagram grid; she gets paid thousands of dollars per month for recurring endorsements.

Matte’s feed is a mix of guns and rough-cut firewood and laser-cut underwear. She doesn’t let anyone shoot guns on her property because her yard is an unofficial foster home for wild deer, several of which she personally nurtured through infancy when their mother was hit by a car. She loves the president, hates the “free-for-all negativity” around him. She is extremely charming. Her platform, she tells me, is a place to preach love.

It’s actually a damned interesting article, albeit an unexpectedly long ‘un. Plenty more pics of several of these lovely gun-bunnies too, bless their hearts. Via MisHum, bless his heart too.

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Business as usual in the Clown World kakistocracy

One of Dov’s most toothsome rants.

We lugs don’t trust anyone in Washington, and we have kind-of figured out finally that the system is too unwieldy, too corrupt ever to fix. The Swamp, we now know, cannot be drained because it is not a marsh or everglade but an ocean of sludge filled with plastic straws, unrecyclable paper, Strzok-Page love notes, and 33,000 bleached messages about yoga and wedding dresses. The System betrays all. Half of us vote for a liberal like Clinton, only to be presented with an end to Welfare, a tough crime bill, and a dry-cleaning bill for a dress stain. At least he delivered Midnight Basketball. The other half of us, deep-rooted patriotic conservatives, vote for Republicans and end up with Justices like David Souter and Harry Blackmun, with wage and price controls, and with international “free-trade” agreements that all-but-destroy our steel and aluminum industries, while decimating our manufacturing. We elect Liberals who run on peace agendas, like Woodrow Wilson (“He Kept Us Out of War”) or JFK/LBJ who swear they will not allow a Goldwater to embroil us in military catastrophe, and we end up with our boys dying overseas in huge numbers in Vietnam. Or the other half of us go with our more conservative “America First” approach, and we end up with reckless adventurism aiming for regime change in the Arab Muslim world, based on the delusion that there beats in the heart-and-soul of every resident of Iraq, Afghanistan, and Syria a passion to actualize the writings of Rousseau, Locke, and Thoreau.

We watch our borders overrun brazenly, shamelessly. No control, with millions teeming to enter illegally, lecturing us: “We have a right to be here!” They could lecture us “Yankee Go Home!” but we cannot send them back? They don’t speak a word of English except the one sentence they have been taught by American Leftist activists to memorize: “I claim asylum because of well-founded fear of persecution based on my ethnicity, race, and religion. Para todas las demás preguntas, marque 2 por Español.” (For all other questions, dial 2 por Español.) We see the Democrats swear for decades to guard the border, build a wall, and protect the endangered lower economic class and African Americans from a swarm of cheap labor, until the Democrats figure out that the lower economic class and African Americans are in their pockets anyway, while the New Illegals actually turn Republican strongholds into Democrat states. So we turn to Republicans, who promise to fix the border. Next thing you know, the capitalist big business “Chambers of Commerce” are in cahoots with the Left, importing the same Illegals for cheap labor. We turn to Reagan for some conservative rugged patriotism and firm strength, and he grants universal amnesty to Illegals. Then Bush-the-First promises to be even kinder and gentler. Then Bush-the-Next decides that, since he has Spanish-speaking relatives who can pronounce “nookyuluh” as well as he can, we may as well let the Illegals keep coming in because, unknown to the Liberals, the Illegals all are small-business owners and all are devout Hispanic Catholics who are pro-life and anti-abortion like the Pope, pro-family, conservative Republicans at heart. And then Bush!-the-Last comes in, with Ana Navarro as his political advisor, telling us that we don’t want to keep the millions out because we are “better than that.”

So we elect Trump, who promises to deport 10 million Illegals, and we give him a Republican House and a Republican Senate, and we oust John Boehner for a new young dynamic GOP House Speaker who was the Vice Presidential nominee and conservative conscience of the losing Romney campaign, and that guy turns out to be Whatever. He gets his one “Budget Reconciliation” chance in a two-year legislative term to pass a budget that will build a border wall because that is the one bill every two years that does not require a filibuster-proof 60-vote Senate vote for passage, so it’s a piece of cake. And he “pulls a Bill Buckner” (rest his soul) and leaves it out. So even though the President proves to be a once-in-a-generation Transformational President who brashly eliminates swaths of economy-strangling regulations, who dramatically renegotiates one after another terrible international trade treaty, who fearlessly pulls out of cockamamie international fiascoes like the Iran Deal and the Paris Climate Nonsense, who moves the American embassy in Israel to Jerusalem and recognizes United Jerusalem as Israel’s eternal capital and Israeli sovereignty over the Golan, who directs laser-focused attention at the border crisis and tries one-after-another-after-another stratagem to deal with the morass, who waves a magic wand and resurrects a Dead Economy with bold tax cuts and even more determined deregulating and converts it into a blazing-hot engine, who reduces African-American, Hispanic-American, Asian-American, and female unemployment to historic lows, who changes the face of the Supreme Court and nominates more than one hundred solid conservative federal district and appellate judges, who reimagines America’s energy-producing capabilities and converts America into a net exporter of energy and the world’s largest energy producer, who recalibrates the Veterans Administration and V.A. health care, who forces through a “Right to Try” initiative that allows Americans with perilous ailments access to cutting-edge medical research possibilities — despite all that, and so much more, the GOP House not only drops the ball but butt-fumbles.

No solutions or meaningful fixes to medical coverage, health care, and the mess exacerbated many times over by Obamacare. No solutions to the Southern Border national emergency. No groundbreaking ground-breaking infrastructure legislation. And so the American voters throw the bums out in 2018.

The Left Democrat districts were going to vote Democrat no matter what. The conservative Republican districts were going to vote GOP no matter what. But in 2018, Democrats targeted more moderate, though conservative-leaning swing districts, and they campaigned on promises. We will do it. We will fix health care. We will find a fix for the border. We will rebuild the infrastructure. The message and that promise won the day. The same moderate, conservative-leaning swing districts that repeatedly had given the Republicans control of the House for much of the past two decades switched over for a better way. They were promised an end to the old Obama-era shenanigans. No more Democrats Gone Wild. No more Nancy Pelosi as Speaker.

We Promise.

Do I even need to tell you to read all of it?

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Do as they say, not as they do

Not in MY backyard.

Talk about great news for blue America. The left tells us that all immigration is good. More immigration is better. There is no distinction between legal and illegal varieties of immigration. If you disagree with any of this, you’re a white nationalist. That’s what they’ve said almost every day for the last two years.

And now, completely out of the blue, comes the man they despise most in the world, Donald J. Trump, offering them what they want more than anything: more immigrants, immediately, delivered right to their door at federal expense. It must have been like Christmas morning.

But that’s not how they responded. The left wasn’t happy about Trump’s offer. They were shocked and enraged. You know what this is, they said? It’s dumping. The headline on Mother Jones read, “Donald Trump Wanted to Dump Asylum Seekers on Streets of Democratic Cities.” In the view of The Daily Beast’s Harry Siegel, “The White House wanted to dump refugees in sanctuary cities.” He called that idea “nasty.” At the same time, almost simultaneously, both CNN and MSNBC ran headlines accusing the White House of wanting to “dump” migrants into cities.

What’s the message here? Immigrants are trash? If you wanted to defile someone’s pristine city, you’d “dump” immigrants on it? Hmm. That sounds a little … searching for the word here … racist — a lot racist, actually. But Nancy Pelosi agrees with it. She immediately issued a statement: “The extent of this administration’s cynicism and cruelty cannot be overstated. Using human beings — including little children — as pawns in their warped game to perpetuate fear and demonize immigrants is despicable.”

But that doesn’t really make sense. How can the presence of immigrants “perpetuate fear?” San Francisco is a sanctuary city. It subverted federal law in the hope more illegal immigrants would come. Now they may be coming, and San Francisco is upset.

Well, say the news anchors, Trump’s plan is illegal. There’s a process. Really? Did the people of Lewiston, Maine, or Hazleton, Pennsylvania — and countless other places across the country — take part in a process when massive groups of refugees were moved to their cities? But when you try to do that to the city where Pelosi lives, it’s supposedly “illegal.” This is getting confusing.

Let’s make it easier. Here’s a list of neighborhoods that could use some immediate refugee resettlement. These are affluent places. They are politically liberal. As a matter of policy and conviction, they love illegal immigrants; they just don’t really have any yet. Let’s change that. 

OHHH, let’s. This was one of Trump’s very best ideas, although admittedly it’s also probably the one with the least likelihood of his ever being allowed to actually do it. In hindsight, I’d bet Trump knows that too, and only brought it up at all to call attention to the staggering, balls-out chutzpahcrisy of the Democrat-Socialist “diversity” pimps. Once again, he called them out and exposed them for the brazen frauds they are—fobbing PC disaster off on the hated Normals that they’d never for one second tolerate in their own walled, gated, and guarded neighborhoods.

He not only called the pious shitlibs on their “sanctuary city” bullshit; he rubbed their noses in it, smeared them all over with it, and made complete fools out of them. No, he didn’t get it done, more’s the pity. But that wasn’t gonna happen anyway, and he still managed to score big with it nonetheless. Maybe the man really IS playing 4D chess here, huh?

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NeverForeverTrump

The Trump train: alllll aboooaaaarrrrd!

Years from now, history will note a major event that occurred in 2016. An event that significantly altered the course of the country and the world. At the time, the U.S. was in, what turned out to be, the last year of a 10-year economic slump. It was, in fact, the only 10-year period in history where the economy did not achieve 3% annual growth in any year.

From 2006 to 2016 economic growth averaged about 2%. That subpar growth rate led to fewer opportunities for Americans. That led to poor employment prospects and stagnant wages. There were many people who had absolutely no opportunity. That led to resentment.

Wary citizens were beginning to reject the capitalistic system in favor of socialism. The country was headed in an un-American direction.

On the world stage, a number of threats existed. There were numerous problems in the Middle East, Russia and China were going on offense, and North Korea was getting serious about displaying their strength. As for America’s foreign policy, it was as if someone gave the “stand down” order to every conflict, which resulted in the U.S. taking very soft, and ultimately weak, positions.

So Donald Trump came along. He was a very, very successful businessperson and TV personality. Although elected president, he was not a politician. But Trump’s message was welcomed by Americans. He told people to look in the mirror. He asked them to see where they were and what they had.

He emphasized being great, winning, and returning to prosperity. His vision was always clear. Unfortunately, his unpolished and politically incorrect communication skills were not as clear, which allowed the strong Trump opposition to make things extremely difficult for the president.

Although he did nothing wrong, the opposition insisted the election was a fraud. This led to a nearly two-year investigation by a special prosecutor, which found the president did not collude with any foreign government and he was not guilty of any other charges. Still, Trump continues to live with the constant media barrage, which seems to convict him of a new crime almost daily.

Yeah, well, there’s a reason for that, and it goes far beyond being about Trump alone.

America cannot continue as a republic without the acceptance that one party routinely will be turned out of office. Democrats no longer accept that bedrock principle of American liberty. They see themselves as the only party entitled to govern. “Trump Derangement Syndrome” and the Russian collusion frame-up are two faces of the same coin: Democrats now reject the orderly succession of power through duly constituted elections.

Democrats have whipped the nation into mass hysteria for three years. It’s a destructive game, manipulating people into a rage until Americans see each other as enemies. Most dangerous of all, driven by the social justice agenda of Obama progressives, Democrats are purposely delegitimizing our democratic institutions.

Democrats are playing an entirely different game than Republicans. Democrats think they have a mandate from history to seize power for people of color, LGBTQ minorities, and radical feminists. They don’t like America or Americans, who they consider bigoted and backward. They don’t like the principles of our founding, which recognize the God-given rights of individuals, not groups.

They don’t like how we elect presidents, because the Electoral College protects the heartland from domination by big cities, mostly controlled by Democrats. Social justice Democrats don’t want to control immigration, legal or illegal, because they are successfully replacing the existing American population with new people who will vote for them. They are substituting their Marxist vision of redistributive social justice for the American Dream.

We must go on the offensive. It is time to delegitimize Trump derangement. Stop answering and reporting on each lie and rabid attack as if they are part of normal politics. Attack Trump derangement head on, as a dangerous rejection of our democracy. Call out the stooges, Democrat and Republican, who take part in it.

The propaganda blitzkrieg of false accusations that fuel Trump derangement has never been seen in American politics before and it has no place in American life. It is left-wing fascism. It is devastating to the civility, tolerance, and basic unity that make the American experiment possible. We need to call out Democrats non-stop to match their waterfall of lies. They are destroying our democracy on purpose.

Bang, zoom, NAILED it, read the rest. Meanwhile, over to Aesop for more of the antidote:

He wasn’t my guy in 2016. He’s not, and never was, an actual conservative.

But he’s governed more conservatively than any president since Coolidge, including Reagan, and that ain’t nothing. I don’t care what you say, I care what you do.

The NeverTrumpTards and other lunatics will want to carp about him in comments.
A) Don’t. It’ll be blasted to the ether the minute I see it. I’m all out of patience with that level of idiocy and stupidity. Ride your convictions right into the ground, and STFU here.
B) You think you have reasons. Consult what we got in 1993 as a reward for “punishing Bush(41)” for his awful “No New Taxes” flip-flop disaster. The Clintons are like herpes. We’ll never be rid of them until their entire pustulent line finally dies out. And now you’d take a chance on giving the country genital warts or AIDS too? Yeah, no.
So just don’t go there. Srsly.

And let’s get serious: watching CNN’s ratings crater, and seeing Rachel Madcow and Bill Maher cry and rant and gnash their teeth in impotent rage was pretty damned funny in 2016. Imagine seeing their heads actually exploding in 2020!

That, alone, is a platform I can get behind, wholeheartedly.

Amen to that, brother. For all those prone to whining about this or that or the other supposed Trump failure, betrayal, or defeat, a clue: you don’t get “Perfect” as an option here. It ain’t on the menu in this life, nor did it appear on any ballot I ever laid eyes on. Mostly, we get either “Godawful” or “Catastrophic,” cushioned by a whole hell of a lot of pillowy, comfortable “More of the same.” Once in a while we find ourselves comparatively blessed with “Good enough,” which can then pleasantly surprise us by turning out to be “Better than expected.” That’s Trump, more or less, although I had high hopes for him all along, myself.

What Trump is, is EXACTLY the man we needed, at EXACTLY the right time. The fact that he’s a total outsider who pisses off pretty much all of the political establishment, Left and housebroken Right—elected officials, pundits, the DC bureaucracy, Enemedia, lobbyists, consultants, EVERYBODY—isn’t “problematic” or “troublesome”; IT’S THE WHOLE DAMNED POINT. It’s why those of us who like him, like him. And that, in turn, is the very thing all these so-called “experts” just can NOT figure out.

No, he won’t be able to “save” the country. No, he will not reverse America’s long, agonizing decline. No, he can’t “restore” the country either, other than temporarily; the next Uniparty president will undo every one of Trump’s accomplishments and restore us to Once-Great Britain v2.0 status so fast he, she, or Zxhirm will appear blurry around the edges to the naked eye. But you can be certain Trump still has plenty more Making Madcow Cry left in him yet. That’s good enough for me, a solid win no matter how you slice it.

Update! Oh, and by the way: yes, he’s going to win. You just watch.

Yet Trump remains the change agent in the campaign. It’s the Democrats who are the party of the status quo, the sorry state of the union pre-2016.

Decline.

Despair.

Declarations of how much we Normal people suck.

That’s their platform. It’s not very appealing in places where people have jobs that involve sweating and headgear. And while the Dems may run up 60%-70% margins among baristas and public employee union parasites in the blue states, who cares?

Electoral College, baby!

Thank you again, Founders, for the wisdom to set up a system to keep us from being ruled by the freaks in New York City and Scat Francisco!

I wasn’t a Trump supporter until he beat my guy Cruz. He earned my support by keeping his promises and running up the score. But my assessment of his chances is objective, not subjective. The competition is going to get crushed. That’s a fact.

That’s my belief. I could be wrong, of course. But hey, I called it right the last time around. And unless the Democrat-Socialists come up with a way to slip something into the water supply that will make Real Americans as bugfuck-nuts as they are, I firmly expect to be right this time, too.

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Senator Tom Cotton wins the Innarnets!

Economic power as weapon.

There’s a troubling trend among giant corporations using this wealth and power to force liberal dogma on an unwilling people. As liberal activists have lost control of the judiciary, they’ve turned to a different hub of power to impose their views on the rest of the country. This time it’s private power, located in a few mega-cities on the coasts.

And that’s not an exaggeration. The overwhelming majority of companies that lashed out against the pro-life movement in that New York Times ad are headquartered on the coasts, hoping to rule the rest of us like colonies in the hinterlands. More than three-quarters are headquartered in New York or California alone. More than a dozen are foreign companies. Yet those same companies presume to tell all of America what we should think.

And for some reason, this outrage only seems to go in one direction. As states like Arkansas have passed pro-life laws, other states have sadly gone down a different path, stripping unborn children of recognition and protection under the law. States like New York, Illinois, and Vermont recently passed laws declaring abortion a “fundamental right,” accessible until moments before birth for practically any reason as long as you have a doctor’s note.
We’ve already begun to see the consequences of these laws, which strain so mightily to defy and deny the humanity of the unborn. In New York City, prosecutors recently dropped a charge of abortion against a man who brutally stabbed to death his girlfriend and her unborn child. They dropped that charge because the pro-abortion law that had just passed the legislature in Albany removed all criminal penalties for killing an unborn child. According to the laws of New York State, that woman’s child never existed.

Pro-abortion laws passed in New York, Illinois, Vermont, and elsewhere truly deserve the label “radical.” So why isn’t the national media covering these radical laws with the intensity they’ve reserved for states like Georgia? Where are the indignant CEOs who profess to care so much for their female employees? Nowhere to be found, because their outrage is very selective. They don’t speak for the majority of Americans, much less for women. Instead, they’re actively trying to force a pro-abortion agenda on an unwilling public.

These companies want to wield a veto power over the democratic debate and decisions of Arkansans and citizens across our country. They want to force the latest social fashions of the coasts on small towns they would never visit in a million years. They want us to betray our deeply held beliefs about life and death, in favor of a specious account of “equality.” If there’s one thing the New York Times ad got right, it’s that “the future of equality hangs in the balance” when it comes to abortion. But their idea of equality doesn’t include everyone: it omits and degrades unborn babies as expendable, lesser than, even “bad for business.” That’s a strange kind of equality, if you ask me.

Nailed it, clean and tight. Humble thanks to Ace for so generously providing that transcription for us, bless his coal-black heart. His own remarks, wherein he moots the idea of shareholder lawsuits against the CEOs of these WOKE! corporations, are as always worth a look:

Now, most such suits are over stuff like corporate charity but those suits don’t work because of the very malleable concept of “goodwill.” If a corporation thinks that donating to Planned Parenthood buys it more goodwill, it’s within the corporate charter (as increasing goodwill is always or almost always permitted as a basic function of business).

HOWEVER, moves that alienate half the country, threaten states, BOYCOTT entire states, etc., do not increase goodwill. They decrease it.

Also, I’m 99% sure they don’t run polls about this stuff to determine if such a move would increase goodwill or not. I think I know that because I know a guy who does consulting and was asked about this sort of issue, asked by the CEO of a MAJOR, MAJOR corporation for advice (because he thought all the liberal marketing department people and mid-level managers were just telling them their Get Trump opinion, not necessarily reflective of popular opinion).

How major a corporation? Well, one of the blue chips.

Anyway, he started to do a study, and so began looking for previous studies on this sort of issue for a background and template for his own study.

His findings? THERE HAS NEVER BEEN AN ACTUAL STUDY OR POLL DONE ON A CORPORATE POLITICAL POSITIONING MOVE. N-E-V-E-R.

His was the first.

Corporations just make these decisions based on the personal political preferences of the officers and board, and their vague “feels.”

True enough, but my guess is even that ain’t the whole story. These corporations—many of them headquartered in urban liberal citadels like NYC—are not ony acting in accord with their executives’ personal political leanings, but are also responding to the loud, shrill demands of Proggie activists—who have more than adequately demonstrated their willingness to launch protests cum riots at the very doorstep of those corporate HQs, complete with threats, human chains blocking main entrances, plus the usual assorted piss-and-shit-flinging, sabotage, and senseless, random violence.

The Left has long been the squeaky wheel, and the squeaky wheel gets the grease. And when that greasing is in harmony with corporate leadership’s own political preferences anyway—and when they also know that conservatives/Normals/whatever are unlikely in the extreme to make things as uncomfortable for them as they already know the Left will—well, just what would be the downside for the CEOs here?

It always boils down to the same old thing in the end, doesn’t it? The comfortably-numb Right, accustomed through long habit of passively accepting defeat after defeat, must find a way to rile itself up enough to start directly confronting the Left—ALL of the Left, from individual political-street-theater performers right up to corporate malefactors who must be forced to make a choice as to whether their business is, y’know, the business they’re in, or politics. Until that happens, the Right must resign itself to being antagonized, harrassed, attacked, and ignored.

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Great minds

Richard hips us to this article from the Bee wherein they recognize the awesome, awesome greatness of a certain band—both musically and, umm…well, uhhh…

Study: AC/DC’s ‘Highway To Hell’ More Theologically Accurate Than 96% Of Modern Worship Songs

Yes, it’s the Bee again. I am, however, unprepared to render judgment as to whether or not it’s satire in this particular case.

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Have an (exploding) cigar

Curses, foiled again!

WASHINGTON DC (AP) – After over two years of attempting to arrest, indict, embarrass, harm, stop, stall, or even marginally interfere with the implacable forward progress of President Trump using a wide array of convoluted tricks, schemes, and scandals, Congressional Democrats are now determined to exact retribution for their continual failures from the ACME Manufacturing Company, Inc., claiming that the company’s products are both defective and hazardous, and that they have consistently allowed President Trump to get away.

During this time period, numerous Democrats have used ACME products in their political machinations, however, due to the humiliation involved, very few were willing to discuss their experiences on the record. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi offered the following statement.

“I remember when Trump called me into the Oval Office to discuss funding the border wall, and I had this feeling that he might try leaving before I could get on camera and cut him down with childish name-calling. So I took some ACME Wall Paint and made a fake archway into the next room. Sure enough, 2 minutes into the meeting, he runs out, but somehow he runs THROUGH the archway I painted. I tried running through the archway after him, but I hit the wall face-first and splayed out flat against it. That’s why I have this bandage on my nose. It is NOT – as some people have suggested – from cosmetic surgery. That’s the other bandage on my nose.”

At the time we interviewed Senator Chuck Schumer after his Trump experience, he had been compressed into a two-foot tall cylinder with just his arms and legs sticking out. As it was difficult to understand him over the accordion noises he made with every step, the interview was brief.

“Fell off a cliff. ACME anvil fell on me. ACME umbrella did nothing. I don’t wanna talk about it,” Schumer said before accordioning away.

By way of comment on the investigation, President Trump offered only the single brief and cryptic tweet: “Meep Meep”.

Okay y’all, I’m thinking this one just might be satire too.

(Via Van der Leun)

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Unclear and confuscated

Obligatory disclaimer: yes, it’s the Bee, and I do know it’s satire. Or, as their new subscription-solicitation box pronounces: “Fake news you can trust, delivered straight to your inbox.”

And yes, I signed up for it.

WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a special session called to order Friday, Congress voted unanimously to do a complete overhaul of Father’s Day, renaming the holiday “Toxic Masculinity Awareness Day” and redefining the day’s meaning to encourage citizens to heap shame and disgust on all fathers, current or potential.

Americans across the country excitedly prepared to celebrate the updated holiday designed to shame fathers and all things masculine as the weekend approached.

“It was just time,” said House Speaker Paul Ryan, citing the high numbers of depression and anxiety among men as “a good sign things are progressing in the right direction, but we still have a lot of work to do before all men, everywhere do the right thing and hate themselves with the appropriate level of vehemence.” The new initiative seeks to have all men wailing in the streets in sackcloth and ashes, flagellating and weeping with shame and regret for their harmful, problematic masculinity.

The rewritten holiday guidelines suggest cancelling any gift orders for cigars or plans to take dad out for steak and instead sitting dad on the floor in the living room and repeatedly shaming him for being part of the problem, saying things like “Take that money you were going to spend on a beard trimmer and instead donate it to women’s rights.” The government also established an associated website, ToxicFathersDay.gov, where you can download a free card to give your father that reads, “This isn’t your day any more. Do better.”

Okay, I THINK it’s satire. Maybe not; it’s so hard to tell these days, and attaching that “statement” to Paul RINO ain’t helping to keep the lines clear either. Here, let’s try another one.

U.S.—While everyone has a mother–a necessity in every family for raising and providing for the children–there is a second type of parent some people have called a “father.” It is unknown what purpose this seemingly vestigial parent provides, but today is a holiday known as Father’s Day, where the existence of fathers is acknowledged even if their purpose is unknown.

There had been concerns in the past that fathers actually were harmful to families because of their toxic masculinity, but that masculinity has been tamed in recent years. Now they’re relatively harmless and can help with chores around the house–though usually only under tight supervision, as they’re not very good at them–and can occasionally watch the children–though this again can cause trouble, as they often irritate the children with bad jokes.

While no one recommends having a father, if you know of one, today is the day to tell him, “There you are.” Scientists expect fathers to completely disappear in the next few decades, though, as they’re replaced with an automated device that can both kill spiders and say, “Nice to meet you, Hungry.”

Yep, I think it’s satire. I THINK.

Know what the real problem with the Bee is, though? Every danged time I look in over there I wind up wanting to excerpt EVERYthing here. They just suck me right in every time, and whenever I find myself immersed therein it’s so enjoyable that I don’t want to come back out again.

Update! Exhibit A in support of that last ‘graph of mine.

Covert Navy SEAL Team Really Starting To Regret Wearing These Pride Month Uniforms
RAQQA, SYRIA—A Navy SEAL Team recently expressed regret in showing support for Pride Month after their new uniforms gave away their position in a covert operation to infiltrate an ISIS stronghold. Seal Captain James McKeever says they endured heavy gunfire after the little rainbow flags poking up off of their shoulder area drew the enemy’s attention. “The whole mission was a bust. We barely made it out alive.”

The SEAL team is now being investigated for hate speech after expressing such clearly unpatriotic and anti-gay opinions. “To refuse to wear a bright, rainbow-covered frog suit on a covert ops mission is the definition of anti-gay bias,” said investigator Janice Gillespie. “They will be duly reprimanded.”

See? You SEE what I mean, dammit?

Updated update! An incredibly moving Father’s Day tribute that is DEFINITELY not satirical.

The men of 8th Company were much older now and not as lean as the men — boys, really — who appeared in the photos from 1950-51. Most carried extra weight around the middle, had the leathery skin that came with years of overexposure to the sun, and old tattoos that had purpled with age on biceps and calves that were not as hard and chiseled as they once were — but you didn’t try to tell them that. Like old athletes, they spoke with as much bravado as ever.

I had to smile. It had been my privilege to be raised in the company of such men. They could be profane and the jokes were always off-color. They were, to a man, hard-drinking and chain-smoking. They incessantly complained about the army and were fiercely proud of their part in it. Ornery and ready to fight each other, they were nonetheless ready to die for each other, too. Their vices were ever near the surface and yet, I cannot imagine where America would be without their kind.

I was 20 years old and sat silently watching and listening as I so often did when my father swapped war stories with other veterans. But this time it was different. These weren’t just any veterans; these were the men with whom he had shed blood. This would be his last reunion and it was important to him that I be there. As the son of an 8th Company Ranger, I was, like other sons, an honorary member of this very exclusive club and therefore allowed to participate on the periphery of their banter — and fetch them beer. Lots of beer. Ranger reunions were impossible without beer. And with middle-aged men, that meant frequent trips to the bathroom.

With my father away for a moment on just that sort of mission, one of his old buddies leaned in as if to tell me a secret:

“If any man was ever born to be a soldier, it was your father. Some men have an instinct for the battlefield, and he damn sure did. Absolutely the best shot I ever saw. Could hit flies at a hundred yards. And, man, he was fearless…”

My father, returning, rolled his eyes: “That’s bulls–t, Mike. I was as afraid as any man.”

He turned to me. “It’s as I’ve told you before, son, a man who is truly fearless will get you killed. There’s something wrong with him. His instincts don’t tell him to be afraid when he should be. You want a man on point who wants to stay alive just like you do and whose senses are telling him ‘something’s not right here’ when there’s reason to believe you’re walking into an ambush. Now Mike here, was a helluva point man…” This was all very typical. They extolled each other’s battlefield heroics, but not their own.

All of these men dealt with the psychological wounds of war whether they ever received a Purple Heart or not. My mother tells me that my father suffered from hideous nightmares to the day he died, a recurring one being that he had fallen into a thinly covered mass grave full of bodies in a state of decomposition. Though he fights to climb out over the bodies, the rotten flesh slides off the bones as he grips them and their flesh remained on him for days until he could bathe, a luxury not afforded to men behind enemy lines. Though he would never say, she thinks the nightmare reflected an actual occurrence. I wager all of these men had nightmares of war.

Years later, as he lay on his deathbed delirious from the heavy doses of morphine, he returned to the battlefield. I will never forget his words, a command shouted with urgency and authority: “Cover the left flank! Cover the left flank! Move! Move! Move!” The order was repeated along with something about laying down suppression fire. Whatever the battle he was in, he was reliving it and he was determined to hold the line. In that moment, I prayed that the Lord would take him. He was suffering the horror of war all over again.

The next afternoon, his chest, heaving and belabored for days, relaxed and the air left his lungs in one long sigh. My father was dead.

Trust me when I assure you that you absolutely MUST read all of this. Keep the hankies close at hand when you do. And wonder where we ever found such men, and whether we’ll ever see their like again. Pray to God that we do; sooner or later, as surely as the Sun rises, we’re going to need them.

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Needles: pegged

Say it like you mean it, baby.

Last week, Charlottesville, Virginia Mayor Nikuyah Walker proposed ending recognition of Thomas Jefferson’s birthday as an official city holiday. Instead, she wants the city to celebrate the emancipation of local slaves a month earlier, as “Liberation and Freedom Day.” The proposal will be brought before the city council at either its June 17 or July 1 meeting, reports The Daily Progress, a local newspaper.

Charlottesville is the home to the University of Virginia, one of the United States’s premiere research and educational institutions, which Jefferson personally designed, founded, and led after serving as the U.S. president. It is Jefferson who wrote the words that became a promissory note of freedom for all people and that this nation cashed in its own blood. It is he who helped design a nation that has secured the most freedom for the most people in all of human history. All this means nothing, say today’s rageaholic iconoclasts, because he held slaves.

Followed to its logical conclusions, this line of thinking bans the idea of greatness itself. It subsumes all good actions to any possibly connected evil actions. It insists that the most defining feature of any person is his sins. And it pretends that simply by virtue of understanding that slavery is wrong, we who live today in the West are perfectly holy, and may freely and smugly condemn every single person who has ever gone before us, and brush away every insight and achievement of human history.

Not one of these overindoctrinated underachievers who want to rid our society of all heroes is fit to shine Thomas Jefferson’s boots. They couldn’t create a nation out of scratch if they tried. They couldn’t in a million years dedicate their lives, their fortunes, and their sacred honor to establishing a country that would be among the first in world history end slavery through a near-suicidal deluge of its own blood, in a dedication to the words and the institutions Jefferson helped create: dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal, and seeing that their government treats them so, at the cost of a higher percentage of deaths than it cost this nation to liberate the entire globe from Adolf Hitler.

So, while Jefferson is too dead to defend himself and the benefactors of his great ingenuities too maleducated by the government of his co-creation to give him the respect he deserves, these envious, cowardly, accomplish-nothings spit on his legacy. The very freedom these people use to dig up and roast his dead corpse they would not have without him. They use the priceless treasure he bought with his life for them like a piece of toilet paper on which to wipe their fetid excrescence.

Seconded, by every last cell in my body. With this boiling-hot screed, Joy Pullman has surely penned one for the ages. Sing it with me one mo’ time ag’in:

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COLLUSION!!!

It’s baaaack.

In the latest media-manufactured crisis du jour, the president now stands falsely accused of inviting foreign interference into our elections.

During an Oval Office interview with ABC News’ George Stephanopoulos on Thursday, President Trump said there “isn’t anything wrong” with listening to information offered up by a foreigner about a candidate’s political opponent.

“It’s not an interference, they have information. I think I’d take it,” he told Stephanapolous when asked whether it’s appropriate to accept opposition research from someone in another country. “If I thought there was something wrong, maybe I’d take it to the FBI, if I thought there was something wrong.”

The rather innocuous comments unleashed the predictable and tiresome widespread outrage.

Kelly mentions odious lizard-woman Ellen Weintraub, who uncorked a blast of self-righteousness at Trump:

“Let me make something 100% clear to the American public and anyone running for public office: It is illegal for any person to solicit, accept, or receive anything of value from a foreign national in connection with a U.S. election,” her statement begins. “This is not a novel concept. Electoral intervention from foreign governments has been considered unacceptable since the beginnings of our nation. Our Founding Fathers sounds the alarm about ‘foreign Interference, Intrigue, and Influence.’”

Back to Kelly for a small problem Weintraub would probably rather you not know about.

Weintraub’s agency continues to sit on a complaint filed 20 months ago by the D.C.-based Campaign Legal Center detailing how both committees failed to report payments to Fusion GPS, only disclosing nearly $13 million in payments to Perkins Coie during the 2016 election cycle. The funds were vaguely described as “legal services” on reporting documents.

But the FEC still hasn’t taken action on the complaint—and there might be a reason why. Before joining the FEC, Weintraub herself was an attorney at Perkins Coie, serving as “Of Counsel to the Political Law Group” according to her FEC bio.

Oooops. No conflict of interest there, no sirree. No further mention, either, of the many other Democrat-Socialists, going all the way back to Ted “Waitress Sandwich” Kennedy, who have either actively solicited or cheerfully accepted foreign offers of election-jiggering, and…HEY, LOOK, OVER THERE! A SQUIRREL!!

For his part Limbaugh asserts that, far from this being an unforced error or gaffe on Trump’s part as some have claimed, he has actually master-trolled his numbskull enemies once again:

And here we go again, folks. Here we go again. Donald Trump sets ’em up, they haven’t figured it out yet. I’m kind of reluctant to explain it here ’cause I don’t want ’em to figure it out, but I gotta explain it so that you get it. Everybody calm down here.

But it’s fascinating to watch this ’cause it – (interruption) Why do I call it a setup? Well, the reason I call it a setup is because the Democrats have actually done it! Trump is forcing these people to go on the record steadfast opposition to this while Barr and Durham are conducting an operation to find out what kind of illegal activity there was between the investigators and Russia and other foreign actors in order to sabotage the Trump campaign and then the Trump presidency.

So Trump is forcing all these people to go public here with their outrage over just thinking about doing it, saying it’s illegal, it’s unpresidential, it’s un-American, and the day is gonna come where everybody’s gonna know that the Democrats did it, that Hillary Clinton did it. And it’s gonna be very difficult for these clowns having conniption fits today to walk it all back, once Barr and Durham make their findings clear.

That’s why I think part of this is a set — Trump is not stupid. Don’t care what anybody thinks, he’s not stupid. And Stephanopoulos did not sandbag him. Stephanopoulos did not set him up, did not catch him in a moment of when his guard was down, or he was not prepared.

Well and good, I guess, but Rush is assuming that these people possess sense of shame enough to preclude them from hypocritically denouncing Trump for something they’re guilty of themselves. Ain’t no evidence to support such an assumption, not a bit of it. Quite the opposite, in fact.

There’s another angle to all this, though, that I haven’t seen mentioned yet: Trump’s flat statement that “…you go and talk honestly to congressmen, they all do it, they always have. And that’s the way it is.” People seem to be overlooking it, but I think it’s more important than some might think. What Trump did there is what he’s been doing all along: he made a simple statement reaffirming a home truth, with an offhand bluntness completely horrifying to the Business As Usual crowd, that all Normal Americans already know. It’s exactly the sort of thing that attracted people who have been longing for many years to hear such truths spoken right out loud to Trump; as such, it won’t damage their bond with him at all, but will only solidify it.

A righteous troll? Who knows. A damaging error, one that will leach support from Trump in 2020? Not on your life. Beat that dead horse as hard as they like, it will gain the Democrat-Socialists and their Enemedia rumpswabs nothing. And in the end, THAT’S the thing they still just don’t get.

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“How can I tell if my Labrador is male or female?” “Easy: you suck. Next”

She’s gonna be sorely missed—by me and Roger Kimball, at the very least.

Donald Trump, the president of the United States, announced yesterday on Twitter that Sarah Huckabee Sanders, White House press secretary, would be departing her job at the end of the month. He later, at a press conference about a new program to help felons reenter the work force, praised her as a ‘magnificent person’ who has done ‘an incredible job.’ Taking the podium, Ms Sanders expressed her admiration for the president and his agenda and said, tears in her eyes, that working for him had been ‘the honor of a lifetime.’

I greatly admire Sarah Sanders. I think she is a breath of fresh air. Obviously loyal to the president and enthusiastically supportive of his agenda, she did what any good press secretary does: she was an effective ambassador of the president and his agenda to a hostile country, the media. She was there partly to explain policy but also, and just as important, to smooth ruffled feathers, cater to feelings of self importance, and spin questions and objections in a direction favored by the president. She helped to provide the most flattering light for his policies and pronouncements. That’s what press secretaries do.

Many of the press reports about Sanders’s departure accused her of lying. It is certainly true that this press secretary, like every other press secretary in the annals of history, spun things for the benefit of the president. Had she not done this, she would not have been doing her job. That said, I thought Sanders was as candid as the the job permitted, not less so than other incumbents of that august office, and much more truthful than the lying press that presumed to criticize her for dishonesty.

Yep. Which is a YUUUGE part of why they hate her. They would have in any event, of course; aside from that yawning, unflattering-to-them honesty gap, she worked for a non-Marxist administration headed by an outsider they hate worse than cancer, AIDS, and the shingles combined. Worse yet, she neither flattered them, sucked up to them, nor took one second’s worth of bullshit off their worthless asses. As Roger says, she was damned good at her job; Trump’s next press sec will have some mighty big shoes to fill. Hopefully, Trump will find someone even more cantankerous and intolerant of Leftymedia nonsense to replace her. Meanwhile, Bill provides this hilarious vid by way of farewell:




Word is Sanders is mulling a run for governor of Arkansas; I wish her nothing but success with that, or whatever else she may choose to take on next.

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Reconstitution

Clown nose OFF.

Conservatives must realize that in terms of creed and culture, we are past the point of no return. It’s time for an offensive strategy.

That subhed slams a drum I’ve been banging on myself for years now. Onwards.

From my vantage, it seems as if we are already living in a hollowed-out shell of a once-great nation where there is diminishing allowance for dissent—and, therefore, diminishing possibilities for recourse. Conservatives have not met the challenge. Whether to Huntington’s standards or to Kesler’s, they have decidedly failed in the “republican task.”

If, in the early 2000s, Americans were concerned for the viability of a society wherein broken families and communities were becoming the norm, we seem to accept one now where brokenness is the norm—and our elites, at least, have just stopped pretending to care. We now reside in a kind of bizarro-land, or, as some in my generation have termed it, “clown world.”

“Clown world” is one of the of the most striking memes to emerge in the realm of online political commentary lately. Like any spicy meme, it has been copied and edited by countless different groups, including some vile ones. But its reach is the product of a simple, philosophically devastating message. “Clown world” is used to describe instances of abasement that at any other point in history, to any person of dignity, would be regarded as incomprehensibly evil or stupid—so outrageous that they must be a joke. State-enforcedsexual transition hormones for children! Drag queen story hour! Voting rights for terrorists! This is Aristophanes with a shot of Nietzsche.

The next line is so damned sweet it makes my few remaining teeth ache.

The resistance to insist on the American way, for no other reason than it is ours and that this is reason enough, has resulted in the Right’s effectual acceptance of the Left’s constantly moving goalposts of woke sensibility.

MMMMMMMMyeah; cleanup in Aisle Mypants, please. Onwards ag’in.

In other words, conservatism gave up on culture. So afraid was the Right of charges of identity-based discrimination that they gradually ceded the whole symbolic, moral, and linguistic ground to the Left, relegating themselves to the “objective” realms of economy and war.

But conservative pundits continued to emphasize disembodied principles. They delayed action. They forwent dignity for the libertine. And as nascent clown world found no substantial pushback from their supposed enemies, it metastasized into a public dogma—an evisceration and replacement of both American culture and creed.

No more. The (“small”-r) republican task should no longer be played as a game of liberal one-upmanship with progressives. What we now face is a culture and a creed subverted beyond recognition. Treating any of its distorted major features as something to be conserved would be like applying makeup to a rotting corpse.

I’d love to excerpt a lot more of this, but I’ll back off now and insist—nay, demand—that you go read all of it. Trust me, you’ll like it. Excellent work, Ms Yang.

Update! Codevilla ponders whether there can even BE a conservative resistance in the first place.

#TheResistance began as an attempt by Clinton and her staffers to explain why their unexpected electoral defeat had to be illegitimate. It burgeoned quickly into rejection of rule by voters because so many on the Left and in the ruling class rallied to it, having already decided that ordinary Americans have no right to stand in their way.

Clinton’s characterization of Trump voters as “deplorables” and “irredeemables” and Barack Obama’s description of rural Republican voters as “clingers” to Bibles, guns, and racism, has long been ruling-class conventional wisdom. This attitude is what crossed the threshold of revolution.

Because the Resistance succeeded so well in limiting the impact of the 2016 election, it solidified the Left and the ruling class’s sense of common identity and entitlement. Henceforth, the bureaucracies, the educational establishment, the judges, the corporate establishment and the media will continue to impose themselves, regardless of conservative election victories or laws, never mind the Constitution. This attitude is not the result of a policy decision, but the expression of an evolving identity.

That last line is the truly important bit: it confirms that those who still hold out hope of the Left “coming to their senses” or backing off in any way, shape, or form from their seditious lunacy are kidding themselves. For Proggy, “the political is personal”; politics has been elevated to unchallenged dominance over every least aspect of Progressivist lives, and they will never countenance any less of a commitment from the rest of us. Which brings up another burning question:

Question For Bernie: What Happens To Those Who Don’t Want To Join Your Commune?

Easy: the gulags, the Killing Fields, the Holodomor, Siberia, Auschwitz. The same thing that always happens, in other words.

Much like Hillary Clinton feeling the need to reintroduce herself to voters multiple times, Bernie Sanders has decided to tell us again exactly what democratic socialism is. Maybe the need for so much explaining indicates that voters know what DemSoc is and want no part of it.

Naahh; only the sane, well-informed ones, that’s all.

The big question that never gets addressed regarding these and other “explanations” of socialism is: Why do the self-identified “democratic socialists” feel it’s OK to force those who’d rather be free into their collective?

Because they’re smarterer than we are, being “experts” who are way more qualified than we’ll ever be to make the correct choices. They’ll decide what “correct” is; your input will be neither sought nor permitted, thanksverymuch.

The system Sanders wants to force on this country of ostensibly free people requires more coercion than that which we are already under. Without force, both real and threatened, socialist systems cannot work. They require governments to take from some and give to others. Its subjects are obligated to participate.

Feature. Not bug.

If Americans learn nothing else about socialism, they should at least know this. “The goal of socialists,” writes William L. Anderson, “is socialism — not prosperity.” In other words, the objective is to use promises of abundance and a better life to do nothing more than amass raw political power.

Precisely so. Now, with the desperate necessity of mounting an effective resistance to such horrors thus established, back to Codevilla we go.

The conservative resistance would have to be organized, openly as a revolution, by national-level political leaders, whose credible voices could not be silenced. This resistance would have two assets: state-local government backed by the people, and economic boycotts.

But rallying the deplorables would have to overcome the natural conservative reluctance to acknowledge that the Republic of the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution, the republic of “all men are created equal,” is beyond our capacity now to restore. It must be understood that it needs instead to be reasserted anew.

The ruling class, unwilling to loosen its grip on America, will appeal to “the rule of law,” use its control of the bureaucracy to cut funds, its control of the media to intimidate, and might even send some federal agents to give substance to that intimidation. They might point guns. But knowing what they are up against, they dare not shoot.

America has already come apart. The conservative resistance can conserve only one of those parts.

Fine and dandy; only one part was ever worth conserving anyway. The other one can rot, its denizens and promoters to be remanded—by force, surrounded by walls and armed guards a la Escape From New York, if necessary—into their crumbling urban Thunderdomes so as to savor the fruits of their ideological “victory” to the absolute fullest.

Or we could just, y’know, shoot them all and be done with it.

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Shut ’em up, shut ’em down

ALL the way down.

The jury just rendered its verdict on punitive damages in the Gibson’s Bakery v. Oberlin College case.

Daniel McGraw, our reporter in the courtroom, reports that in addition to the $11.2 million compensatory damages awarded last Friday, the jury awarded a total of $33 million in punitive damages, which will probably be reduced by the court to $22 million because of the state law cap at twice compensatory (it’s not an absolute cap, but probably will apply here). That brings the total damages to $33 million. We will have the breakdown soon. The jury also awarded attorney’s fees, to be determined by the judge.

The Gibsons suffered a typical SJW Alpha-strike assault for “racism” after nabbing a couple of scumbag black Oberling students for shoplifting. The persecution campaign, intended from the start to destroy a family-owned bakery in business since 1885, was spearheaded by Oberlin College and its head, an odious, frumpy, disheveled bag of lard yclept Meredith Raimondo. After losing the case, Oberlin immediately began whining that awarding proper damages to the victims of their vicious, relentless persecution would put the school out of business for good, and I hope to God it does just that. It’s like this:

Some of the defenders of Oberlin College have claimed that the Gibsons’ were just in it for punishment on this case, and never tried to settle. That could not be further from the truth. According to Lee Plakas, lead attorney for the Gibsons’, a letter was sent before the case was filed in Nov. of 2017 asking for at least some talks on settlement and no answer was sent back (this reporter has seen it).

In early 2018, according to Plakas, two days of talks with a mediator were done, but nothing close to a settlement was achieved. In fact, the talks were initiated by the Gibson’s and “We were ready, willing and able to not have this case go to trial, but Oberlin College and their insurance company seemed to have no interest in settling this case,” Plakas said.

“As they have done throughout this case, they thought that they were above everyone else, and that the rules and working to settle such an egregious case of defaming a good family like the Gibsons’ was beneath them,” he added.

In his closer, Plakas added another stiff shot of 100-proof truth.

Why is the country watching you. Because the country agrees that what happened to the Gibsons should not happen to anyone, but could happen to everyone.

Could…and has, to far too many of us. Letting Oberlin skate would have sent a strong, clear message; this verdict and award does too—the right one.

The above report comes to us from LI’s own William Jacobson, who has done yeoman’s work on this from the start and offered a pretty pungent statement himself:

Oberlin College tried to sacrifice a beloved 5th-generation bakery, its owners, and its employees, at the altar of political correctness in order to appease the campus ‘social justice warfare’ mob. The jury sent a clear message that the truth matters, and so do the reputations and lives of people targeted by false accusations, particularly when those false accusations are spread by powerful institutions. Throughout the trial the Oberlin College defense was tone-deaf and demeaning towards the bakery and its owners, calling the bakery nearly worthless. The jury sent a message that all lives matter, including the lives of ordinary working people who did nothing wrong other than stop people from stealing.

Can’t win a war without fighting back; thankfully the Gibsons, finding themselves forced into a war they never asked for, didn’t want, and in no way deserved, fought back hard. They gave all of us a big win by doing so. As I always say: when liberal tears are flowing, it’s great news for America. Hearty congrats to the good guys, all of ’em. And to the losers: Learn to code, bitches.

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Another day, another win

Why no, I’m NOT tired of it yet.

President Donald John Trump once again roped the dopes in the media with his Mexican tariffs.

Like Wile E. Coyote thumbing through the Acme catalog, they knew better but gave into their worst impulses.

To be sure, President Trump was deadly serious about the imposition of tariffs.

But he also knew he would not have to.

President Trump had the battle won the instant he tweeted tariff. The Mexican government did not bother putting up a fight. The words were kind and diplomatic, and the capitulation was swift and painless.

The government seized the money of human traffickers, sent thousands of its National Guardsmen to its southern border, and agreed to stop the caravans.

But the political side also had a success as President Trump watched his critics throw their grenades — into telephone wires that shot the grenades right back at them.

National Review’s editors huffed and puffed, “The president here is unnecessarily complicating his own life. He has just overseen the successful renegotiation of NAFTA, which will be reconstituted as the U.S.–Mexico–Canada Agreement (USMCA). But that agreement has not yet been ratified — not by the United States, and not by Mexico. Imposing punitive tariffs over a policy dispute unrelated to trade five minutes after negotiating a new trade pact makes the Trump administration — and the United States — look like an unreliable negotiating partner. Mexico is not wrong to resent it, and even Trump allies such as Senator Chuck Grassley (R., Iowa) are against him on this.

“Also, it’s a good rule of thumb to fight one trade war at a time. If the administration, correctly, wants to focus on China’s malign trade practices — and not just during the current dispute but over the long term — it needs good trading relationships with its allies, especially here in North America.”

Who knew there was a rule of thumb on trade wars?

Y’know, you’d think #NeverTrumpTards, having been wrong every damned time about every damned thing, would be getting tired of all the losing already. And now, after having shrieked their throats raw and bloody in indignation over the abominable, inhuman atrocity of tariffs, they find themselves looking at yet another piping-hot, jumbo-sized platter of delicious crow on the menu. It still comes down to the same thing I’ve always said it would: Trump The Disruptor.

Democrats and their allies in the media continually bemoan President Trump breaking long-standing political norms. They still seem unwilling to grasp one of the central tenets of the 2016 movement that led to his election. Yes, accepted practices and “norms” of Washington worked well for apparatchiks of the administrative state and their crony allies among big business and K Street influencers. But this crooked system failed miserably to enhance the well-being of millions of working-class Americans who therefore chose, very knowingly, to send an agitator to Washington, D.C.

President Trump has been particularly forceful in breaking protocol and bucking conventional Beltway wisdom in the international arena. For example, he scuttled our participation in the unfair Paris climate accord. He also successfully shamed NATO partners into paying their proper share of the alliance’s defense burden. In international trade, he demands reciprocity and honest dealings from China, a country that has serially abused America for decades. 

Trump also smartly confronted Mexico over its inaction regarding our volatile shared border. The recent situation there has grown totally untenable, on pace this year to send over 1 million unvetted and uninvited trespassers pouring into our country. The overwhelming majority of these people, contrary to media narrative, are economic migrants willfully abusing our nation’s generous and well-intended asylum provisions. But, because the Democrats in Congress seem to prefer a controversy to a solution when it comes to illegal migration, the internal options for Trump and his Department of Homeland Security remain limited. But thinking creatively, the president determined that our immense economic leverage over Mexico could be summoned to coax them into acting as a good neighbor. For too long regarding Central American migrants, we have allowed Mexico to transfer its temporary trouble into our permanent problem.

But President Trump warned Mexico of imminent trade sanctions unless it shared proactively in the burden of stopping this dangerous flow of people and the attendant humanitarian border crisis it caused. Predictably, critics shrieked in disapproval over the last week.

But Trump did precisely what Trump was elected to do. He saw past the prevarications of the media, the self-serving platitudes of corporate plutocrats, and the pusillanimity of purported allies in the legislature. He took decisive executive action that forced the Mexican government to honor its obligations and respect the sovereignty of our land. After all, if Mexico or any other country wants access to the crown jewel of global commerce — the American consumer market — then it must act as a responsible partner. Our nation seeks prosperity and friendship with all nations, but will not be abused. 

And, note ye well, THAT is a big part of why they loathe him so intensely. The American consumer market is by orders of magnitude the largest in the world—the most powerful economic force on the planet. Corrupt, destitute Mexico simply cannot afford to be denied access to it. Like wise China, who needs to avoid being shut out of the American market WAY more than America needs rack upon rack of shoddy, ill-fitting, poorly-made 4XXXXL cargo shorts at Wal Mart.

No, the only strange thing about all this is that Trump seems to be the only one in Mordor On The Potomac who knows it—or, more accurately, the only one to whom it matters, and who is unashamed about acting as if it mattered. Thus:

Assuredly, these steps will not end the border crisis. Longer-term, our country desperately needs reform of our inane migration laws, particularly as they relate to asylum. We need a wall. We must harness technology to better track visa overstays. But given the options available to him at present, President Trump negotiated masterfully in this confrontation. He recognizes that in the global trade “poker game” America has the strongest hand and must play like it. His steadfast refusal to accept the status quo or cower to the elites validated the hopes that tens of millions placed in him when the voted to send a “disruptor-in-chief” to the Oval Office.

I remain convinced that, try however he might, Trump ain’t gonna be getting any wall; the Ruling Class has too many ways to stymie and stall, and it’s probably the one issue they’re least likely to ever yield on. But he’s still winning anyway, and even the most trivial loss for the Democrat-Socialists is still a win for America.

Update! Desperate, defeated, discombobulated.

Trump’s success in getting Mexico to agree to do more to curb the flow of illegal immigrants through their country and into the United States should be receiving universal praise, but unfortunately, Democrats, who we all know want to see illegal immigration increase to help secure their party’s power in government, couldn’t concede that Trump’s plan worked.

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi called Trump’s tariff threat, which succeeded in its goal, a counterproductive exercise in “threats and temper tantrums.”

“President Trump undermined America’s preeminent leadership role in the world by recklessly threatening to impose tariffs on our close friend and neighbor to the south,” Pelosi, a California Democrat, said Saturday morning. “Threats and temper tantrums are no way to negotiate foreign policy.”

Ummm, actually, Stretch, those “threats and temper tantrums” are more widely known in grown-up circles as “negotiating from a position of strength,” you clown-faced buffoon.

Pelosi said she was “deeply disappointed” by the asylum provisions of the deal, which she claimed “violates the rights of asylum seekers under U.S. law and fails to address the root causes of Central American migration.”

But the most absurd comment came from Senator Chuck Schumer.

And boy, did it ever:



I’m sorry folks, but it would take a heart of stone not to laugh right out loud at that pitiful, all-thumbs attempt at spin. Again: when Democrat-Socialists are crying, America is winning.

Can’t repeat it often enough update! Sefton puts it well, especially with the closer.

Good morning kids. Start of a new week so let’s get with it. The big story over the weekend and continuing is President Trump’s yuuuge win over Mexico, who folded like a wet taco when for the first time in my lifetime a US president actually threatened to seriously punish them with tariffs if they did not stop aiding and abetting the depopulation of Central America (and their own failed kleptocratic third world shit-hole) into our country. From a purely political perspective, it represents a Nelson Muntz laugh of epic proportions to the Democrat-Left-Media Complex and their remoras in the GOP-e who claimed it would destroy our economy, it’s racist and xenophobic or who just openly hate America and have no phony excuses but are grumbling at being kicked hard in the nadlers by Orange-Man-Bad. Yes, the winning – I ain’t now ways tahr’d of it.

Heh. Good as that is, JJ knows this is no real solution, and also knows what is:

Look, we can talk about walls, and troops on the border and all the rest of it all we want. The real long-term solution is to create a virtual wall that for sure is 100% impenetrable: Disincentivizing these people from coming here in the first place. No welfare, no food stamps, no free schools, no college tuition, no free medical care, no drivers licenses…Nada del Tio Azucar, nunca. It’s bad enough that upwards of 30 million foreigners are eligible to drain our Treasury legally. But take a look at the story in the links about a blood-sucking tick convicted of substantial food stamp fraud and multiply that by millions as well and, to quote Everett Dirksen, sooner or later you’re talking about some real money. The other half of that equation, as I stated, rests with our own citizenry. Any person or business that knowingly hires illegal aliens should be punished with severe fines and serious prison time. Does that mean someone who has a lady from Guatemala come in once a week to clean the apartment? Not sure. But something like a food processing plant, garment factory (if we still have them here anymore) or other industry employing masses of illegals should be shuttered, the assets seized and the owners chucked in D-Block.

He’s right, and you know he is. Now on to a truly golden meme, ripped off from elsewhere at the ol’ HQ:

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Jeez-O-Pete, Trump yuks it up with the Queen while Her Herness can’t draw flies even at a Costco warehouse—a place hardly known for drawing celebrities to hang out there. Hope poor old Hils found herself a good deal on pallets of cheap gin to ease the pain and humiliation, at the very least.

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Gibbering baboon opens mouth, hilarity ensues

I repeat: Maxine Waters should be in a job she’s more intellectually qualified for, like cleaning hotel rooms, botching orders through a drive-thru clown head, or serving as a parking-lot speed bump.

Auntie Maxine took a breaking from calling for President Trump’s impeachment for a moment to troll him and it was an epic failure.

Low IQ Max didn’t think this through.

Dude, she isn’t capable of thought. The moron didn’t get quite the response she expected, though.



LOL get fucked, stupid bitch.

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Doctor John the Night Tripper

Fare the well to a most amazing musician: Mac Rebennack, better known as Dr John. Saw him tickle the ivories solo once at a big outdoor jazz fest in downtown Charlotte, and he was truly out of this world. Back in my own piano-playing days, I could handily (ahem) play: most of Mozart’s Piano Sonata in D for Four Hands (after doing a little rejiggering of the score to make it suitable for two); all of Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata; the entire catalog of Scott Joplin’s ragtime stuff, which I committed to memory; and choice excerpts from some of Vince Guaraldi’s A Charlie Brown Christmas score, picked out from a scratchy cassette recording from off the TV speaker. I could even scrape adequately by on some of Fats Waller’s stride stuff, despite being handicapped by not having hands the size of a hamhock to reach those legendary walking tenths of his.

But I could never, ever come close to mastering the rollicking boogie-woogie whose apotheosis is in the vid embedded below. And you better believe I tried; OHH, how I tried, mightily and tirelessly. I bought lesson books featuring Peetey Wheetstraw, Mead Luxe Louis, and other titans of boogie-woogie; no dice. I could get the left hand going, and I could stagger along with the right. What I just COULD NOT do was both at once. And it just KILLED me, dammit.

Dr John was an intriguing and unique character indeed; his story is nothing short of dazzling. He played with everyone from the Stones to Ringo Starr to Gregg Allman to Lou Reed to Professor Longhair to John Legend to the Black Keys to…hell, it would be easier to just list the names of people he didn’t play with. He did more than three dozen albums. He and/or his music graced many movies, radio, and TV shows. He was even featured in a comic book. The theme song to one of the best kids’ PBS cartoons, Curious George, is his.

He fought a long, hard battle with heroin, and in ’89 he finally won. He switched from guitar to piano after shooting himself in the hand. He ran a New Orleans whorehouse, and did a two year jolt in federal stir for dope. He got booted out of Jesuit High School at 16 for playing in nightclubs. In the late 60s, he somehow contrived to work voodoo costumes and rituals into his stage show.

And in 1982, he wrote and performed the score for one of my verymost favorite movies, Cannery Row. That’s where the song below came from; M Emmett Walsh’s “Mack” character banged it out on piano in the epochal party scene, right before the celebrants utterly destroyed Doc’s house. And that was more or less my introduction to Dr John, or reintroduction, maybe. I had heard his classic hit “Right Place, Wrong Time” plenty of times, of course, but never did care a thing for that one.

This here, on the other hand…whew. It grabbed me hard, hasn’t let go yet, and I pray it never does. As I told the young ‘un when I played it for her in the car for the first time earlier today: I don’t care how much of a sour old grouch you are, there just ain’t no way in the world you can feel bad listening to this. Heck, I bet it could even lighten HILLARY!™’s mood a little bit, provided she got herself on the outside of enough bathtub gin beforehand. Bill could probably make his life a lot more bearable if he tried playing it for her now and then.

My kid loved it.



Malcolm John Rebennack performed without pause throughout his entire life on this earth. He died day before yesterday of a sudden heart attack first thing in the morning. But boy, did he ever do a lot of living. Rest easy now, Doc. Heaven’s Helluva Band just upped its game to a whole new level.

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History repeating itself, forever

If you think you fully realize the truth of the old saw “the more things change, the more they stay the same,” well, might want to sit down for this one, folks. I assure you, it is going to blow your mind no matter how jaded and/or cynical you might think yourself to be.

At the height of the 1964 race between Arizona’s junior senator, Barry Goldwater, and President Lyndon Johnson, the cover headline of Factmagazine’s September–October issue practically screamed: 1,189 PSYCHIATRISTS SAY GOLDWATER IS PSYCHOLOGICALLY UNFIT TO BE PRESIDENT! Inside, every page was given over to the feature, titled “The Unconscious of a Conservative: A Special Issue on the Mind of Barry Goldwater.”

Forgotten today, Fact even then was far from a major player on the journalistic scene. It had launched earlier that year and would survive just until 1967. Still, it enjoyed a status among the day’s progressive bien pensants far beyond what its limited circulation might suggest. Edited by the profession’s reigning provocateur, Ralph Ginzburg, its early issues had generated buzz with ahead-of-the-curve investigations of the tobacco and soft-drink industries, as well as American policy in Vietnam.

The issue’s introduction set the tone for the 63 pages to follow. Ginzburg described Goldwater as the product of a “sadistic childhood,” a “paranoiac” with an “obsessive preoccupation with firearms” who “compulsively must prove his daring and masculinity,” adding that “psychoanalysts who find a connection between sadism and an anal character will not be surprised that bathrooms seemed to fascinate Goldwater.”

The “psychiatric evaluations” that took up the next 40 pages were in response to a question that Fact sent to the nation’s psychiatrists from a list supplied by the American Medical Association: “Do you believe Barry Goldwater is psychologically fit to serve as President of the United States?” Ruth Adams of New York replied that she saw in the GOP candidate “a strong identification with the authoritarianism of Hitler, if not identification with Hitler himself,” and other responding psychiatrists echoed that theme. “I believe Goldwater has the same pathological make-up as Hitler, Castro, Stalin and other known schizophrenic leaders,” wrote Chester M. Johnson, Jr., of Long Beach, while Philadelphia’s Paul Fink observed that, like the Führer, the Republican nominee “appeals to the unconscious sadism and hostility in the average human being.” G. Templeton, of Glen Cove, New York, warned that “if Goldwater wins the Presidency, both you and I will be among the first into the concentration camps.”

That the entire exercise was ethically dubious was apparent at the time. As longtime Goldwater advisor Stephen Shadegg noted in disgust, “Those who presumed to reach a medical and psychiatric conclusion about Goldwater without ever having seen him or followed any other of the normal procedures required in a patient-physician relationship betrayed themselves as men unfit to practice any profession.” But the feature drew widespread attention via the media coverage that it generated and full-page ads in the nation’s leading dailies—Goldwater’s people rightly wondered how a modest publication afforded their $100,000 cost—and it undeniably did real damage.

As you may recall, the exact same psychoanalysis-from-a-distance thing has already been attempted with Trump. Incredibly, it’s happening again right now, which I’ll have more on later probably. But the eerie historical echoes are only beginning.

Though his name was on the 1960 bestseller Conscience of a Conservative (actually authored by Brent Bozell), Goldwater was still something of an unknown nationally. But that was not necessarily a negative, since his supporters would have a chance to fill in the blanks. And, already, observed J. William Middendorf II, the investment banker who served as the Draft Goldwater Committee treasurer, a survey they’d commissioned had established that voters tended to view Goldwater “as warm, candid, and a man of strong convictions” and that he “was not thought to be connected to the ‘radical right.’ ”

Nor, before he ran for president, was the attitude of the press notably different. Since coming to the Senate in 1953, Goldwater had always been great copy; deeply conservative, yes, but in a town where most ate, slept, and drank politics, a man of interesting parts. He was a student of Native American culture and language, an expert in aeronautics who’d flown every plane extant, and not only a skilled amateur photographer but also a ham-radio obsessive, with unseen pals around the globe. His was an American story if ever there was one: grandson of an itinerant Jewish immigrant peddler who established Phoenix’s premier department store, which young Barry brought to new heights of success before turning to politics.

Reporters also couldn’t help but like Goldwater personally. He was a man’s man—said what he thought, and cursed for emphasis. Even those who despised his ideas respected his keen sense of honor and love of country. Little wonder, as Perlstein remarks, that to peruse pre-1964 media profiles of Arizona’s junior senator is to find “eight or so years of his uninterrupted honeymoon with the press.” But as generations of Republicans have learned, sometimes to their surprise—see Goldwater’s Senate successor, John McCain—coverage changes according to need.

Starting to get that creepy feeling yet, anybody?

Goldwater and his followers were equally beyond the understanding of the Republican establishment. Even as the GOP convention opened in San Francisco, with the Arizonan’s nomination looming as inevitable, they were still plotting to replace him with a moderate savior: Pennsylvania governor William Scranton.

From the start, Goldwater had been taken aback by the Republican vitriol directed his way. A loyal party man himself, he’d often appeared on behalf of GOP moderates, eager for conservative support in tight races. Now, in San Francisco, he heard defeated rival Ambassador Henry Cabot Lodge say that Goldwater’s foreign policy “would destroy everything we hope for—including life itself”; and also-ran Michigan governor George Romney urge the delegates to “repudiate extremism of the right and the left.” But the cruelest blow came from Scranton, whom Goldwater had served with in the Air Force Reserve, mentored politically, and was considering naming as his running mate. In an open letter challenging Goldwater to a debate on the party’s direction, the Pennsylvania governor said that “Goldwaterism has come to stand for nuclear irresponsibility…for being afraid to forthrightly condemn right-wing extremists…for refusing to stand for law and order in maintaining racial peace.”

Gee, fake-conservative Vichy GOPe Swamp things backstabbing one of their putative own, a DC outsider who desperately needs some support implementing the exact same agenda they paid lip service to for years? Where, oh where, have I heard THAT before?

You’ll definitely want to read all of this one, it’s fascinating (and depressing) stuff. In the end, Goldwater—who I’ve always liked quite a bit, having frequently said that we could surely use more like him nowadays—had a penchant for shooting himself in the foot; his direct, pull-no-punches honesty, his unswerving loyalty, his core decency, his rawboned and unapologetic integrity—none of those fine qualities are at all marketable in the sordid, seamy environs of Mordor On The Potomac.

In a better world they would have been assets, Goldwater’s greatest strengths; instead, they were and remain liabilities that make a candidate his own worst enemy, carrying with them the seeds of his own political destruction at the hands of slimeballs, knaves, blackguards, and just plain scum. Thus:

There’s no knowing if Goldwater would have made a good president. He once told John McCain that if he’d been elected, “you wouldn’t have spent all those years in a Vietnamese prison camp.” “You’re right,” countered McCain, “it would’ve been a Chinese prison camp.” Unquestionably, though, Goldwater was a terrible candidate; it isn’t easy for a major party nominee to poll under 39 percent in a two-man race.

Still, if the GOP and its candidate were 1964’s most obvious losers, what Goldwater would recall as “that season of untempered abuse, vindictive falsehood, desertion of civility” also carried consequences for his tormentors in the media that continue to reverberate today. “At least forty percent of the people,” as GOP national chairman Dean Burch noted at the time, “feel subconsciously or consciously that the press has jobbed Goldwater.” It is a lesson about bias, double standards, and the slope of the playing field that millions of Americans have had no reason to forget ever since.

No reason to forget—and every reason to remember, so as to ensure that a just price is exacted when the time comes.

Moar propaganda update! On the other hand, some things DO change. All of a sudden-like, too.

NYT-propaganda.jpg

That there’s a little chart put together by Zach Goldberg recording the sudden curious surge in usage-frequency of certain words and phrases in the NYT, explored in more depth and detail here. Why, the coincidence is just UNCANNY, innit?

(Via WRSA)

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Making waves in Britain

Trump bitch-slaps Londonistan mayor Mohammad Abdullah al Farouq Shabeeb Hussein Saddiq bin Laden, among other deserving pustules, right between his beady little eyes.

President Trump on Tuesday, in a press conference with outgoing U.K. Prime Minister Theresa May, blasted his British left-wing critics as a “negative force” — and confirmed that he snubbed the leader of the opposition Labour Party when he sought a sit-down.

“I don’t know Jeremy Corbyn, never met him, never spoke to him — he wanted to meet today or tomorrow and I decided I would not do that,” Trump told reporters at the London press conference.

Trump also took another shot at longtime foe and London Mayor Sadiq Khan, who had also opposed Trump’s visit to Britain.

“I don’t think he should be criticizing a representative of the United States that can do so much good for the United Kingdom,” Trump said. “He’s a negative force, not a positive force.”

Of the mayor, Trump said: “He’s done a poor job, crime is up, a lot of problems.”

Ahh, but does it get even better? Hold onto your hats, boys and girls.


“Stone cold loser”? How could you NOT love the guy? But it gets better still, as the shitlibs at NPR hilariously jump in to “fact-check” Trump’s wicked jab regarding Mayor bin Laden’s height, then accuse him of “lying.”

No, seriously, gang. I really mean it. They did that. They really, really did.

Morning Edition host Rachel Martin cued up the lying accusation by highlighting Mayor Sadiq Khan’s dislike of Trump.

Martin then asked NPR London reporter Frank Langfitt what Trump was up to ahead of the trip.

“Well he fired off on Twitter criticism of Khan,” Langfitt said. “He said Khan had done a terrible job as mayor of London, called him a stone-cold loser, compared him to — in the opinion of the president — the very dumb and incompetent mayor of New York City, Bill de Blasio.”

“One difference, Trump said, between the two mayors, he said that Khan is only half the height of de Blasio,” Langfitt said. “That’s not true. Mayor Khan is 5 foot 6.”

NPR did the math and discovered that if the mayor were half the size of de Blasio’s 6 feet 5 inches, he would be just over 3 feet tall.

WELL, thank God those intrepid, dauntless NPR “journalists” got to the bottom of that one for us. What would we do without these heroes, eh? Loads more from Ace, including a report on the wanton murder of the Londonistan Left’s infamous Baby Trump blimp by an apparent Trump supporter. I dunno, call it a “post-birth abortion,” maybe.

Update! NPR is gonna want to fact-check this one too, I bet.

ENGLAND—England has reluctantly ceded control of their country over to Donald Trump after the visiting US president was given a sword by a strange woman lying in a pond.

Trump was walking by the lake, taking in the beautiful sights of the English countryside, when the woman emerged from the surface of the waters, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite. Trump began to bellow at her.

“Hey, very fine woman over there!” he shouted. “I very much appreciate English girls. Maybe the best girls in the world. Great teeth. How’d you like a tour of the White House sometime? You should see my office, it’s literally an oval.” Trump then attempted to wade out to her to continue their conversation, but the frightened lady of the lake tossed a sword in his direction to ward him off before disappearing.

“Have it your way!” he called out as he walked away, Excalibur in tow, his hosts in shock as they realized they now had to bend the knee to Donald Trump.

Political analysts attempted to point out that supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony, and that just because a watery tart throws a sword at you, that doesn’t mean that you’re a king. But Trump ordered them to be quiet.

It’s good to be King. Even if it’s only England.

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Day By Day fundie: give early, often, and bigly

Longtime CF brother-in-arms Chris Muir—the evil genius behind the universally-beloved Day By Day comic—is holding his annual fundraiser this week, prompting this here sticky post in support. Over lo, these many years, Chris and I have each seen the other through some tough personal tragedies, hashed out our stand on various issues of the day, lamented and reviled the eight-year Ogabe rein of error, and along the way forged a real friendship that I value highly. CF jumped in and propagandized for DBD from Day Uno, and Chris reciprocated by doing some excellent custom artwork for CF, including a fantastic header that I might just see if I can break out of storage for the week.

There are a couple of other most worthy ‘toons out there these days, but through both the superlative quality of his art, his deft presentation of his ideas, and his own stubborn cussedness, Chris has put DBD at the top of the heap. More importantly, when someone like Glenn Reynolds insists on the crucial necessity of slugging it out toe to toe with the neo-Marxist/Maoist/Gramscian Left in our societal struggle, Muir and DBD are precisely what he’s talking about. Muir and his colleagues are in the front-line trenches of the Great Culture War—a war our side simply cannot afford to keep on losing if we’re to have any hope of retrieving whatever remains of our stolen nation from the filthy talons of the Left.

So yeah, dig down and give Muir a financial boost if you can. I’m awed by his talent, grateful to call him an ally, and proud to call him a friend. Link to his donation page is here, to the DBD main page here. Oh yeah, I’m also working on putting together some sort of a code snippit so’s I can start running the daily strip again here at CF, since the Innarnuts somehow broke the old Javascript that automagically did it before. Fingers crossed on that one, people. As I said: this post sticky, to remain up top for the rest of the week.

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Pure brilliance

Bill links to an AOSHQ commenter who has quite the way with words.

Saira Rao, just shut the fuck up. Shut the whole fucking fuck up. Shut the new extended three hour director’s cut edition the fuck up. Once you’ve shut that fuck up, put in the bonus disc and click on the deleted fucks and shut those the fuck up. And once you have finished shutting the physical fuck up, redeem the code on the back, download the digital fuck from Amazon and shut those fucks up. And once your mouth has receded into itself with such force from shutting the fuck up that your entire digestive system collapses into a black hole, shut the fuck up one more time.

I got chills here. I swear, I’d consider having that tattooed on me someplace if I had enough blank fleshly real estate left for it. Only one response possible to such a glistering delight of precious-metal FOAD:



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Amadeus versus Salerius

Bonus points if you know where I got the title from.

Salieri is one of history’s all-time losers—a bystander run over by a Mack truck of malicious gossip. Shortly before he died, in 1825, a story that he had poisoned Mozart went around Vienna. In 1830, Alexander Pushkin used that rumor as the basis for his play “Mozart and Salieri,” casting the former as a doltish genius and the latter as a jealous schemer. Later in the nineteenth century, Rimsky-Korsakov turned Pushkin’s play into a witty short opera. In 1979, the British playwright Peter Shaffer wrote “Amadeus,” a sophisticated variation on Pushkin’s concept, which became a mainstay of the modern stage. Five years after that, Miloš Forman made a flamboyant film out of Shaffer’s material, with F. Murray Abraham playing Salieri as a suave, pursed-lipped malefactor.

Two centuries of calumny have created sympathy for the musical devil: I found Salieri’s grave festooned with bouquets. These were evidence that the man and his music are enjoying a modest comeback. Of his forty-odd operas, more than a dozen have been revived, and artists such as Riccardo Muti, Cecilia Bartoli, and Christophe Rousset have pleaded his case. I was in Vienna to attend Rousset’s performance of Salieri’s French opera “Tarare” at the Theater an der Wien. A German-language biography of Salieri, by the composer and musicologist Timo Jouko Herrmann, was published earlier this year. In 2015, Herrmann discovered the score of a cantata, “Per la ricuperata salute di Ofelia,” with one section composed by Salieri and another by Mozart. The find made clear what scholars have long known: that the two were more colleagues than rivals, and that their relationship was complicated mainly by Mozart’s tendency to see plots arrayed against him.

As brilliant as Abraham’s performance in “Amadeus” is, the Salieri of stage and screen is a fictional being. The real man was a more or less benevolent character who energetically involved himself in the musical life of Vienna and taught dozens of composers, including Beethoven and Schubert. Having been plucked from orphanhood by a generous mentor, he usually gave composition lessons for free. To be sure, he was a well-connected man who used his power to advance his cause. Beethoven once earned his wrath by presenting a concert on the same night as Salieri’s annual Christmastime benefit for widows and orphans. Yet this formidable operator had a nimble wit and enjoyed jokes at his own expense. Amid the procession of megalomaniacs, misanthropes, and basket cases who make up the classical pantheon, he seems to have been one of the more likable fellows.

Above all, his music is worth hearing. Mozart was a greater composer, but not immeasurably greater. To call Salieri the “patron saint of mediocrities,” as Shaffer does in his play, sets the bar for mediocrity too high. Salieri’s operas are tuneful, excellently crafted, inventive in their orchestration, and sometimes startlingly progressive in outlook. “Tarare,” which has a libretto by Pierre Beaumarchais, dares to show the overthrow of a despot. “Il Mondo Alla Rovescia” (“The World Upside Down”) reverses gender roles. “Die Neger,” his final opera, includes an interracial love duet. Although Salieri’s work is outwardly conservative, it tugs in unexpected directions, perhaps because he had an unusually open mind about what could happen on an opera stage.

As with any historical film, Amadeus utilizes a goodish dollop of artistic license in order to jazz up the story—some of the looseness trivial, some of it pretty severe. The liberties taken by the film in regard to Salieri, though, were damned near defamatory. Salieri was an entirely conciliatory, avuncular fellow: a man of good humor, friendly, considerate and decent. He was an adept player of the political games in Emperor Joseph’s court, but not malicious about it. Joseph also bore scant resemblance to his portrayal in Amadeus:

“Amadeus” serves Joseph no better than it does Salieri, portraying the ruler as a dithering dimwit. He was, in fact, a keenly musical man who acted as a full-time artistic administrator, attending to composers, librettists, singers, and budgets as if there were nothing more important to occupy his time. Vienna’s move to the center of European musical life had much to do with Joseph’s determination to attract talented artists—and, when necessary, to set them in competition with one another.

Amadeus has also been panned for its overly simplistic portrayal of Mozart himself as little more than an abrasive, self-indulgent, egotistical brat. Nonetheless, despite its occasionally-egregious rejiggering of historical fact, the movie remains one my very favorites.

Strangely, the instance of Amadeus playing fast and loose with history that most struck me was the scene wherein the scheming Salieri, in a moment of unguarded honesty, admits to Mozart that “…you are the greatest composer known to me.” That was actually said of Mozart by the great Franz Joseph Haydn, not directly to Wolfgang but in a letter to his father Leopold. To wit:

I tell you before God, and as an honest man, your son is the greatest composer known to me by person and repute, he has taste and what is more the greatest skill in composition.

I have no earthly idea why that one stuck with me the way it has, but it has. Anyways, this New Yorker rehabilitation of Salieri’s unjustly tarnished escutcheon is an intriguing read, for any of you out there who might be classical-music fanciers.

Update! Dang it, almost forgot to mention the juiciest apocryphal Mozart-Salieri legend of them all, the very core of the plot of Forman’s Amadeus:

Finally, let’s look at the Requiem. Was the commission conceived by Salieri as a way to drive Mozart mad? No. Was it some malicious plot to make Mozart believe he was writing a requiem for himself? No. Was it commissioned by an anonymous messenger? Yes, and that is where we need to begin.

Count Franz Walsegg-Stuppach was a music lover and wealthy landowner from Lower Austria. On February 14, 1791, his young wife died. He came up an idea. He would commission Mozart to write a requiem mass that he would pass off as his own. It would be performed on the anniversary of his wife’s death. Walsegg-Stuppach asked a neighbor to be an anonymous messenger and contact the composer. The neighbor was Turkish. The foreign accent may have confused Mozart.

Even after Mozart’s death, the Walsegg-Stuppach persisted with his deception. He copied the music (which had been completed by Mozart’s students) into his own handwriting. On December 11, 1793, he conducted it. It was entitled, “Requiem, composto del Conte Walsegg”!

Meanwhile, back to the New Yorker for the reality:

In mid-November, 1791, Mozart fell ill with fever and swelling, caused by an unknown malady. (Two candidates are strep infection and kidney failure.) Salieri evidently visited Mozart’s bedside a few days before the end, which came on December 5th, and he joined the funeral procession. He probably conducted the première of the tremendous Requiem that Mozart left unfinished at his death.

Ironic, no? Sometimes, truth really IS stranger than fiction. Or every bit as entertaining, at least.

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A brand new day, a brand new way

Steyn heralds the dawning of the new age.

In any normal UK election, it would be inconceivable for either of the two main parties – Conservative and Labour – to attract just 23 per cent of the vote. The fact that that is all they could muster between them is hilarious, and greatly to be enjoyed. As I put it on the radio last week, the departing Theresa May has led the Tories to their worst result in two hundred years. But, really, that’s praising with faint damns. I saw Daniel Hannan on the telly extending Mrs May’s impressive feat back through the pre-Reform Act era and accounting it the Tories’ worst result since 1678. Which is kind of hard to spin. Her forced resignation last Friday morning (by which point her party had made it clear they wouldn’t stick with her past lunch) ensures that she and that election result will be yoked together for all time. And jolly well deserved it is.

You said a mouthful there, brother.

As I’ve been saying for four years in a Trump context, it’s easier for the base to get itself a new elite than for the elite to get itself a new base. Three years ago the Brexit referendum revealed that Parliament and the people had become misaligned: If over half the people support a policy that no “mainstream” party supports, then in what sense are those parties mainstream? Mrs May should have enacted the people’s wishes, exited the EU on WTO terms, left it largely to civil servants to smooth the technical adjustments, and then invited Brussels to take its time and make proposals for such new arrangements as they might wish to entertain. By now, Brexit would be receding in the rear-view mirror, and normal politics – that’s to say, two-party Tory-Labour politics – would have resumed.

Instead, Mrs May in particular but also Parliament in general chose to double-down on the estrangement from the masses revealed by the referendum, and spent the next three years demonstrating that, whatever the Prime Minister had in mind when she first declared “Brexit means Brexit”, it obviously doesn’t mean leaving the European Union. Either through malice or stupidity or condescension, the political class opted to widen its breach with the people – and Nigel Farage, who is a very canny fellow, decided six weeks ago to create a party to fill the gap in a European election the UK shouldn’t have had to participate in.

The globalists overreached; like the Democrat-Socialists when Ogabe won in 2008, they assumed the traditionalists they so bitterly loathe were vanquished at last, leaving the field wide open for them to begin a Great Leap Forward into the worldwide Tranzi tyranny they always dreamed of. They seem to have been wrong about that, or so the Trump win here, the Brexit debacle in the UK, and this week’s EU election results indicate. Wrong, or at least premature, anyway. We’ll see where it all goes, but for now the signs are encouraging.

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Courage!

Wait, you mean there’s still a sensible, conservative actor left alive in Hollywood?

On Memorial Day weekend actor Jon Voight released a moving tribute in support of President Donald Trump.

Voight praised Trump for battling the left and their absurd words of destruction.

People of the Republican Party I know you will agree with me when I say our president has out utmost respect and our love. This job is not easy. For he is battling the left and their absurd words of destruction. I said this once and I’ll say this again, that our nation has been built on the solid ground from our forefathers. And there is a moral code of duty that has been passed on from President Lincoln. I’m here today to acknowledge the truth. And I’m here today to tell you my fellow Americans that our country is stronger, safer and with more jobs because our president has made his every move correct. Don’t be fooled by the political left because we are the people of this nation that is witnessing triumph. So let us stand with our president. Let us stand up for this truth that President Trump is the greatest president since Abraham Lincoln. God bless America. And may God continue to guide this nation.

Probably safe to assume that Voight intended this to serve as a de facto retirement announcement, bless his heart, since he now has no chance of ever getting work in Hellywood again. Well done anyway, Jon.

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Declaration of war

Unintentionally amusing headline juxtaposition at RCP.

Trump’s Rhetoric Is a Hallmark of Totalitarianism Dana Milbank, Salt Lake Tribune

True Extent of Obama’s Spying on the Press Revealed John Merline, Issues & Insights

Foaming, frothing idiot Milbank keeps using that word; I do not think it means what he thinks it means. Nor did he seem much bothered by it under Ogabe’s reign of error. Meanwhile, Trump is taking the offensive:

Timing is everything, and timing explains President Trump’s decision to finally pull the ripcord and open the Obama administration’s bag of dirty tricks.

With his memo giving Attorney General Bill Barr the authority to declassify any documents related to the investigation of the 2016 campaign, Trump made good on a longstanding promise. Most important, his decision signaled that the War of Washington is entering a crucial new phase.

The president is going nuclear.

After months of dancing between her party’s impeachment caucus and those who see it as political disaster, Pelosi sided with the impeachers by accusing Trump of a “coverup.”

That was Wednesday morning, and it was the final straw. Hours later, Trump walked out of their meeting on infrastructure, told the media that “I don’t do coverups” and put in motion the declassification order released Thursday.

The order means Trump is giving up on getting major legislation passed before the 2020 election. In his mind, making the 2016 documents public was always a declaration of war that would end any hope of bipartisanship.

Recall that he had often promised to release them, but never did. He said he was waiting for the right time, calling the documents the ultimate counterpunch.

Last November, in an Oval Office interview, he told me and two Post colleagues that if the Dems, who had just won the House in the midterms, engaged in “presidential harassment,” that would be the right time.

“I will hit them so hard, they’ve never seen a hit like that,” the president warned. “If they want to play tough, I will do it. And they will see how devastating those pages are.”

After long and bitter years of disappointment and Vichy GOPe betrayal, this is PRECISELY the sort of thing Trump supporters have been longing for from the beginning. Now stay that course and burn the Demonrats right to the fucking ground, Mr President. Scorch the earth, piss on the ashes, and salt ’em.

Gotta say, though, that Trump is totally bass-ackwards and wrong about this next.

Once he came close but pulled back, reportedly at the urging of Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein, who was overseeing the Mueller probe. That was odd because Rosenstein had a clear conflict of interest, having signed the final application to spy on Carter Page. That is just one of the documents that will be released because the application likely misled judges on the FISA Court.

Trump also hoped that, once the Mueller probe ended, Dems would be a more normal opposition party and he could make deals with them on critical issues.

Besides, he had a fondness for Pelosi, as demonstrated by his offer to help secure GOP votes to make her speaker if Dems were too divided. “You know, she loves this country. And she’s a very smart woman. She’s done a very good job,” he said the day after the midterms.

She doesn’t, she isn’t, and she hasn’t. But let’s keep our eye on the ball concerning what the whole mess was really all about—first and foremost, by insisting on using the proper word for it.

According to The American Heritage Dictionary, a hoax is “1. an act intended to deceive or trick” or “2. Something that has been established or accepted by fraudulent means.”

The spectacle of round-the-clock hostile media coverage of the Trump-Russia fantasy certainly was intended to “deceive or trick.” And certainly we learn almost every day a little more about how the various investigations were started on the basis of “fraudulent means” (here’s looking at you Christopher Steele).

But thinking about it, I conclude that the term “hoax” is wholly inadequate to describe the enormity of the political scandal that was perpetrated against Donald Trump, against the office of the president, and ultimately against the American people.

For one thing, the word “hoax” implies something jocular or prankish. The joke might be malicious, but it is still intended to be humorous. There was nothing at all humorous about what just happened in our political life, though the hysteria of the anti-Trump chorus—the pussy-behatted females complaining about how “crude” Trump was, the “comedian” who paraded about with a bloody doll’s head representing the president, the tears and imprecations and jeremiads disgorged by the press and by Trump’s political enemies: all that did have a sort of ghastly if pathetic humor about it.

But when we step back and consider what actually happened over the past three years—and, more, what almost happened—it is clear that the word “hoax” does not begin to cover the reality of what I have been calling for many months the greatest political scandal in the history of the American republic.

Does that, too, sound hyperbolic, like worrying about commas when Shanghai is burning? Some people think so. I have several times said why I think they are wrong.

Perhaps the best way of summarizing my disagreement is by suggesting an alternative to the word “hoax.” It’s not a novel suggestion.

On the contrary, it’s often been used in concert with or as a synonym for “hoax.” But I think it is a better word in this context because it expresses the malign intention behind the multifarious activities directed against candidate Trump and then President Trump. The word I have in mind is “coup.”

Later in his article, Kimball links to LJ Keith’s most worthy rundown of the whole seditious plot, which I think I’ll jailbreak from this post to give it a shiny, new one all its own.

Update! Just saw this handy-dandy comparison chart, attached by a commenter on the Kimball piece.

WaterVsObamagate.jpg

Sorta puts it all into perspective, don’t it? The Watergate bunch were absolute pikers compared to Ogabe’s crew.

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"America is at that awkward stage. It's too late to work within the system, but too early to shoot the bastards." – Claire Wolfe, 101 Things to Do 'Til the Revolution

"To put it simply, the Left is the stupid and the insane, led by the evil. You can’t persuade the stupid or the insane and you had damn well better fight the evil." - Skeptic

"Give me the media and I will make of any nation a herd of swine." - Joseph Goebbels

"Ain't no misunderstanding this war. They want to rule us and aim to do it. We aim not to allow it. All there is to it." - NC Reed, from Parno's Peril

"I just want a government that fits in the box it originally came in." -Bill Whittle

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