As Seen on TV!
President Obama on Friday hailed the “amazing growth” in phony stimulus jobs, especially from nonexistent congressional districts, as a “sure sign that we’re seeing a make-believe recovery and an encouraging spurt in faux GDP.” …
The president criticized his predecessor, George W. Bush, for “offering false hope without the fictitious numbers to back it up.”
“My administration provides genuine false hope,” Obama said…
Meanwhile, Democrats in Congress have reacted to the revelation that millions in stimulus cash reportedly generated thousands of jobs in congressional districts that don’t exist, by noting that “those congressional districts don’t exist … yet,” in the words of Sen. Harry Reid, D-Nev.
That reminds me of the video game I’m developing; it’s like “Fantasy Baseball”, only it’s “Fantasy Congress”. It will sell for $787 Billion per copy–but I only need to sell one!
I’m also working on some TV pilots for CFN, including:
* “Americans Idled”, a singing non-competition for the Funemployed; everybody loses.
* “Dancing with the Decline“, in which climate fiction-writers waltz with the data what brung ‘em.
* “Desperate Housemembers”, the story of Blue Dogs who voted for PelosiCare, and the prequel to the coming new Disaster Flick “2010“.
* “The Biggest Loser”, which is the story of every American if ObamaCare passes. If not, it’s the story of Al Gore and the Warmal e-mails That Capped His Trade.
* “Pimp My Car Company: Yankee Edition” because the car companies down South were doing fine.
* “This Old Housing Crisis” in which Congress (‘Liar’s Club’) and the president (‘Welcome Back, Carter‘) double down on Socialized Mortgages (‘Fantasy Poker Tour’) in hopes of restarting the housing market (‘Fantasy Island’).
* and “CSI: Wasilla”, in which dozens of AP fact-checkers descend on the tiny town to see if Sarah Palin ever took 16 items through the “15 items or less”-line at the supermarket.
This is a spin-off from “The U-Files”, in which Very Special Agent Sully of the Atlantic Bureau obsessively searches through the semi-frozen medical waste dumpsters behind Wasilla Memorial Hospital, desperately seeking what he claims is The Clue That Will Explain it All.
Remember, kids: “They Wouldn’t Put It on TV if It Wasn’t True”!
Besides, that’s what the Internet is for.

