Wherein I mention the unmentionable

Somebody ought to commend to the attention of the Righteously Indignants™ a regrettably neglected Biblical phrase stressing the importance of tending to one’s own knitting.

Until very recently, it would have been hard to imagine anything more iconic of American life than Coca-Cola and baseball. Today both remind me of Benito Mussolini’s corporatist – aka, fascist — game of merging of state and corporate power. The CEOs of these operations should hang their heads in shame and fire their public-relations teams. So should the CEOs of Delta and American Airlines, Black Rock, Cisco, American Express, and American Airlines, who have promoted President Biden’s false assertions that tightening election procedures to bring them back into line — and in accord with those of civilized Western governments elsewhere — is racist voter suppression. I’m fed up with this never-ending sham: partisan power grabs to weaken the most important features of American life being cloaked in virtuous anti-racism.

Following Biden’s lead, the CEO of Coca Cola (a company already in the spotlight for its advice to its workers to “be less white”) James Quincey chimed in with this pablum:

Voting is a foundational right in America, and we have long championed efforts to make it easier to vote.

Instead of making fizzy sugar water.

We want to be crystal clear and state unambiguously that we are disappointed in the outcome of the Georgia voting legislation. Throughout Georgia’s legislative session we provided feedback to members of both legislative chambers and political parties, opposing measures in the bills that would diminish or deter access to voting.

Gee, that’s too bad; I really hate that you’re disappointed. Me, I’m disappointed that you’re spending so much of your time “providing feedback” when what you oughta be doing is making fizzy sugar water.

Our approach has always been to work with stakeholders to advocate for positive change, and we will continue to engage with legislators, advocacy groups, business leaders and others to work towards ensuring broad access to voting is available to every eligible voter in our home state.

Well, I do hope that you’re still able to squeeze at least a little bit of making fizzy sugar water into your obviously busy schedule.

Additionally, our focus is now on supporting federal legislation that protects voting access and addresses voter suppression across the country. We all have a duty to protect everyone’s right to vote, and we will continue to stand up for what is right in Georgia and across the U.S.

As the CEO of a company that makes fizzy sugar water, your focus of right ought to be on making fizzy sugar water, you have a duty to make fizzy sugar water, and you need to tear yourself away from all that “standing up for what is right” folderol to continue making fizzy sugar water. Although you appear to have forgotten, you have a job already, one for which you are quite extravagantly compensated. I suggest you get back to it. If shitlib political preening is all that important to you, you can “stand up for what is right” on your own damned time.

It’s sadly emblematic of our era that it’s now considered not just perfectly appropriate but actually quite commendable for corporate execs, Hollywood bubbleheads, sportsball felons, rock stars, and pretty much every other halfass-famous Tom, Dick, and D’Shonze’ellenious to unabashedly scold the rest of us about our entirely unacceptable political views. Rather than being embarrassed by such obnoxious presumption as any decent person would, our self-styled superiors are all quite proud of themselves, and expect that their wisdom regarding matters about which they patently don’t know their ass from an innertube with wrinkles painted on it will be greeted by their lowly inferiors with the awe and obeisance that is no more than the due of such Olympian beings as Themselves.

All while not making fizzy sugar water.

20 thoughts on “Wherein I mention the unmentionable

  1. I thought it was Beer, Hotdogs, and Baseball. That’s what it’s always been at every Major and Minor League game I’ve ever been to, including the tailgate and parking lot parties.

    What’s this “Coke and Baseball” shit?

      1. Never mind:

        Author: “Clarice Feldman”

        Female, and quite possibly not an American gal, or she’d have gotten it right.

        All of the American Gals I’ve known or seen who show up at the ballpark were beer and Ballpark franks kinda gals.

        1. Clarice is a real American. She’s pretty old now (must be at least 80), both her and husband are attorney’s if I remember it right. Trump supporter from the time he came down the escalator. She is the real deal.

              1. Seriously. You start saying that Coca-Cola and Baseball go together, and after that, it’s just a tiny step off of the slippery slope to calling soccer “football” and claiming that polo is the great American pastime.

                And then next she’ll be going so far as to scrape MAGA stickers off of the bumpers of cars, and voting for Romney for President.

                You just can’t trust people like that.

                1. Heh, like a lot of people she loved the shrub, GWB, right up until the glasses fell off and she realized the truth. She knew Romney sucked.

                  As American as blueberry pie.

  2. Boys, ain’t but one gin-yoo-wine Southron soda: good ol’ Sun Drop, the nectar of the Gods. Okay, two, throw its close sibling Cheerwine in as well. Or, as we rednecks know it, Cherrywine, or Chillywine.

    And don’t give me any of that Mountain Dew nonsense (shudder) either; Mountain Dew is what you[‘d end up with if you left a bottle of SD sitting on the counter overnight with the lid off to remove all traces of carbonation, then dumped about three heaping tablespoons of sugar into it. No bite, no crispness, all lame, syrupy treacle. Vile, vile stuff, that Mountain Dew, up with which I will not put.

      1. Iced tea I never could stand, so I don’t have a dog in that fight. But BBQ has been covered here several times, including a lengthy flame-war back-and-forth with James Lileks some years back. It was all in good fun, of course, and both James and I thoroughly enjoyed the exchange. Just another precious thing losing two decades’ worth of archives from last year’s Rooskie hack cost me, damn their eyes.

    1. I had a machinery installer that traveled all over the world overseeing our installations, typically between 4-6 weeks per machine. Each shipment of machinery had to include multiple cases of Sun Drop. He lived on the damn stuff.

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