It’s gonna be
a bitch a shitload of fun.
What if Trump refuses to accept defeat in 2020?
President Donald Trump’s critics are increasingly focused on the question of which Democrat will challenge him for the presidency in 2020. It’s an important question, but another one might be even more important: Regardless of who runs in 2020, if Trump loses, will he leave the Oval Office peacefully?
Follows, the usual pantload you’d expect from The Most Busted Name In News, written by one of the most smackable dweebs ever to lapse into hysterics about overcooked tofu ruining—RUINING!!—his fifty-dollar bowl of artisanal, free-range ramen noodles. Think I’m kidding? Check it:
THIS. IS. CNN. My God, where the hell did they ever dig up such a wetsmack, no-ball bedwetter, anyway?
Of course all the dweebie’s handwringing angst is for naught, based as it is on the flawed liberal premise that Trump is some sort of NaziHitlerfascistdictatortyrantstrongman, which remains just as everlastingly stupid as it was the night he was elected and they all started crying and spazzing out from the shock and horror of it all. So we won’t bother fisking the rest of the gooey, stinking mess in detail.
But it did set me to thinking: if Trump DOES lose in 2020—which I still consider to be the most likely scenario, by the way—what ought to be OUR response? I mean, seeing as how we’ve already seen them flatly refuse to accept the results of an election, going so far as to launch a sort of pussified palace coup in response to their defeat?
For one thing, there should be protests, even riots, all over the whole damned country. The welkin should be made to ring with ceaseless cries of “NOT MY PRESIDENT!” from every corner. The electoral count itself shouldn’t be certified by a single Red state pending meticulous investigations into ballot fraud, which should be as drawn out as they can be made. Op-eds tut-tutting about the new president taking office “under a cloud of suspicion and doubt” ought to be run repeatedly in every conservative publication. Let the bolder among ’em refer to him unfailingly as the “ostensible” or “putative” President So-And-So.
Most important of all, though, is this: GOP Congressmen should immediately launch as many investigations, blue-ribbon commissions, and fact-finding panels as they have personnel to staff. Let a thousand Muellers bloom, I say; let these “investigations” be as wide-open and far-reaching as his own personal flea-circus has been, no matter what their actual mandate may specifically be. Drag ’em all out, too; insist on the “vital importance” of allowing them to “complete their work” unencumbered in any way, even passing legislation expressly forbidding any and all interference with them or their task.
Make the next Democrat-Socialist president the most investigated, harrassed, hounded, hindered, and hamstrung president in all of history. Truss him as tightly the Lilliputians did Gulliver, and then dare him to so much as wiggle an eyebrow. Go after his family, his friends, his appointees, his neighbors, and anyone he ever so much as sneezed at on the subway decades ago in like fashion. Imprison as many of them as possible, on any pretext that can be contrived. Offer each phonus-balonus conviction as further “proof” of his corruption and unfitness for office. Start the House impeachment process on January 21st.
Harry his appointees in restaurants, grocery stores, and gas stations, just as Maxine Fucking Waters called for. Protest at their homes long after midnight, for days and weeks on end; inconvenience and bully their neighbors too, while you’re at it. Assault any and every one of his supporters bodily; ambush them in gangs, injure them as severely as possible before running off into the night. When someone complains about the violence, blame the President and his “climate of hate.” Turn the tables by declaring your fear of his “thuggish” supporters and their well-known penchant for fascist violence.
Lie about Their Guy ceaselessly. Claim he said things he never actually said; claim that he didn’t say things he did. Blame him for any personal insecurity, neurosis, or irritation you ever suffered. Make things up out of whole cloth and assert them with unswerving confidence as if they were nothing more than common, universally-accepted knowledge. Persecute their president and everyone in his orbit relentlessly; make all their lives a living hell, every minute of every day, seven days a week. Make him and everyone around him wish not only that he’d never even thought of running for President at all, but that he and they had never been born at all.
In short, do every last thing they themselves have spent the last two years doing to Trump and his supporters, right down to the Nth detail. Only more so. Take it all further—double down, then redouble it, then double it again. Make sure Their Guy can’t accomplish even the most trivial agenda item without having to wade through a raging torrent of pain-in-the-ass first.
Ain’t gonna happen, of course. In particular, the legislative end of this hopeful fantasy would have to be put into action by the GOPe, which…well, ’nuff said about that. But it sure is nice to think about, ain’t it?(Via WRSA)