Cold Fury

Harshing your mellow since 9/01

One SICK burn

Julie Kelly provides an amusing, unexpected twist.

He helped conceive a hoax so outlandish that only the most gullible, craven, or witless person could believe it.

The attack, as he called it, allegedly was executed by mysterious and politically motivated thugs with the intent to inflict harm. It exploited the political climate of the moment given that the chief goal of the ruse—and of the perpetrator himself—was to sow division in an already-fractured American populace for his own gratification. Nonstop news coverage and social media chatter ensued. The heretofore obscure perpetrator gained instant fame.

Lawmakers, journalists, and celebrities acted as accomplices, allowing themselves to be duped and conferring immediate legitimacy to the event. Public resources were diverted away from more serious matters. Whenever fair-minded observers voiced skepticism about the questionable nature of the circumstances and evidence at hand, they were riddled with insults.

As authorities began to expose the hoax, the mastermind lashed out, blasting his detractors and making incendiary accusations.

The public mostly went along with it because it sounded right or, at least, familiar like the narrative that Donald Trump and his people ultimately are at the center of everything wrong with our country today. And astoundingly, even as his story fell apart and his early supporters tried to distance themselves from the ruse, the hoaxster remained entrenched, beclowning himself and those who aided the scam.

No, I am not talking here about Jussie Smollett, the “Empire” actor who concocted an elaborate storyabout how MAGA-hat wearing hoodlums attacked him in the middle of a frigid night on an underground street in downtown Chicago.

I am talking about Representative Adam Schiff, the California congressman who helped make up a story about how Donald Trump and his campaign associates conspired with the Kremlin to influence the outcome of the 2016 presidential election.

Adam Schiff was Jussie Smollett before Jussie Smollett arrived on the scene. Few Americans had heard of Schiff before he earned notoriety by planting a false flag on the nation’s smoldering political landscape in 2016. And it’s not hard to draw a line between the hoax that Schiff perpetuated on the American public and the hoax that Smollett conceived and executed last month. In fact, Schiff tweeted his sympathies to the actor shortly after the “horrific attack,” as he called it, and signaled his rejection of this “act of hatred and bigotry.”

Oh MAN, that smarts all the way over here. Schiff is far too stupid to notice that he just got hammered into red, pulpy goo, natch. But still. Incredibly, Kelly’s beatdown only gets worse for Schiff-For-Brains from there. Meanwhile, libtards are distraught over the crushing of a sweet, sweet dream:

U.S.—The nation’s liberals were struck by a devastating blow this week after finding out a hate crime, reported by Empire actor Jussie Smollet, didn’t actually happen.

“I needed this to be true,” said liberal columnist Hanna Spalding. “When I first heard the news of this attack, I was filled with so much hope. I felt so validated. Then that was taken away. Now I just want to cry into my pillow.”
 
The attack had been called “a modern-day lynching” by democratic presidential candidate Cory Booker but after Chicago police reported that the “trajectory of the investigation” into Smollet’s story had shifted, Smollet was stripped of his victim status. Booker became irate, phoning the Chicago police chief and shouting repeatedly, “Check it again! CHECK IT AGAIN!”

After some deep breathing exercises, Booker spoke with reporters. “How are we supposed to intentionally turn the nation against each other and exploit these divisions for political power if people won’t commit a simple hate crime once in a while?”

Candlelight vigils are being arranged in liberal cities across the country as millions mourn the loss of one of the most potentially divisive crimes in the last decade. “There was so much promise there. Now there’s just emptiness,” said one mourner in Berkley, CA.

“While Smollet’s attack may have been a hoax, our emotions have undergone a modern-day lynching,” said activist Andrea Jones at a vigil in Chicago. “If you think about it, this is even worse than if the crime had actually happened. A lot of people put a lot of hope into Smollet’s story. Our expectations have been violently assaulted. Yesterday we thought one man had been attacked. Today, our narrative is the one in a hospital bed, sucking Jell-O through a straw and fighting for its life.”  

It’s satire…OR IS IT?

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1 thought on “One SICK burn

  1. Who do you know, after being supposedly attacked, would walk home leaving a noose around his/her neck, AFTER the attack stopped and the perps had absconded? Pure boooolsheeeet from the getgo.

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"America is at that awkward stage. It's too late to work within the system, but too early to shoot the bastards." – Claire Wolfe, 101 Things to Do 'Til the Revolution

"To put it simply, the Left is the stupid and the insane, led by the evil. You can’t persuade the stupid or the insane and you had damn well better fight the evil." - Skeptic

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