A grateful nation gives thanks as its beloved Il Douche solves its energy problems at last.
President Obama admitted today that he does not have a “silver bullet” solution for skyrocketing gas prices, but he proposed alternative energy sources such as “a plant-like substance, algae” as a way of cutting dependence on oil by 17 percent.
“We’re making new investments in the development of gasoline, diesel, and jet fuel that’s actually made from a plant-like substance, algae — you’ve got a bunch of algae out here,” Obama said at the University of Miami today. “If we can figure out how to make energy out of that, we’ll be doing alright. Believe it or not, we could replace up to 17 percent of the oil we import for transportation with this fuel that we can grow right here in America.”
The Department of Energy (DOE) currently spends about $85 million on 30 research projects “to develop algal biofuels,” according to the White House, which announced that Obama is committing another $14 million to the idea.
Leadership. Visionary or crackpot, take your pick. Now, back to a place His Royal Majesty is only glancingly familiar with from pictures, TV, rumor, and movies: reality.
Oil industry leaders reject Obama’s claim to have given significant support to oil production. “These have been the most difficult three years from a policy standpoint that I’ve ever seen in my career,” Bruce Vincent, president of Swift Energy, an oil and gas company in Houston, said yesterday. “They’ve done nothing but restrict access and delay permitting.”
I’ll let Ace deal with the light work of smacking down the rainbow illusions of the Idiot In Chief:
In the future, we’ll probably have laser power for aircraft. All aircraft must expend a considerable amount of fuel just to loft the mass of the fuel they carry to 10,000 feet. It’s weird, but rockets, for example, expend something like 90% of their fuel just to lift the other 10% of their fuel.
So what if you had your fuel source on the ground, and beamed that power via a laser, which agitated a Flux Capacitor on an aircraft (you know, I’m not an engineer)? Then there would be no fuel wasted lifting the fuel up to 20,000 feet. The fuel would be on the ground. Weightless, as far as the aircraft knows. The aircraft would only carry enough fuel for an emergency landing.
Anyway, this is fun to talk about. It’s also 40 years off.
Right now, we need oil. Oil is what the world runs on. Not lasers, and not fusion, and not fucking algae, for the love of God.
There will always be some technological innovations and occasionally a paradigm-shifting breakthrough, a watershed.
But your policy cannot be built up on the premise “And then a miracle happens,” and further you certainly cannot schedule it to happen bureaucratically.
Turns out, we will assuredly not be looking back on this as the moment when the oceans began to recede and the planet began to heal.
I’ll just go ahead and say it: this boyish man is without doubt the dumbest, least-accomplished, most useless person ever to infest the Oval Office. Yes, I am including Monica Lewinski in that. And anyone and everyone who voted for him ought to be confined to some sort of home.